The Complete Guide to Everything

The Complete Guide to Everything

By Tim Daniels and Tom Reynolds

A weekly podcast for knowledge about anything and everything. From North Korea to Nicolas Cage, Tim and Tom leave no stone unturned in their humble quest to make the world a more informed place. Put away the encyclopedia four-eyes because this may just be the last resource you'll ever need. Wikipedia, consider yourselves on warning.

Episodes

Alien Abduction

One of the worst things that can happen to a person is being abducted by aliens in the middle of the night while you’re just trying to get a good night’s sleep. This week we’re talking about alien abduction, something Tom is afraid of just about every night. Also we change up the format a bit this week and kick off the episode by solving a listener problem concerning a hobbyist lumberjack unwittingly terrorizing the old ladies of his neighborhood.
09/08/201h 5m

Chipotle: Part 2

After covering the business side of Chipotle last week, we're finally talking about what everybody loves about the juggernaut fast casual chain: the delicious food that only occasionally makes their patrons violently ill.
02/08/201h 11m

Chipotle: Part 1

The originator of the fast casual revolution: Chipotle. This week we’re going over their history and corporate governance, but it’s more fun than it sounds, cocaine is involved!
27/07/201h 10m

5G

It's the dawn of a new era! 5G technology will make our lives 1000x times better by making our mobile phones slightly faster. But what exactly is 5G? And why are some of the dumbest people on earth saying the craziest things about it? We explain everything, and also talk about the band Good Charlotte for a few minutes.
19/07/201h 14m

Tim and Tom Can't Help But Solve Your Problems

People have got a lot of problems but luckily we’ve got a lot of solutions. This week we’ve dedicated ourselves to giving back and doing an all TNTSYP episode. We tackle a fireworks-related neighborhood app problem, a girlfriend with bad glasses, and a neighbor who wants to talk astrology and borrow other peoples’ cars.
13/07/201h 9m

Showers

Lather on up and join us for an in-depth discussion about showering. This week we talk about our own personal shower routines, the history of showers, and a baboon that worked on the railroad.
05/07/201h 4m

Segway

Just when you thought 2020 couldn’t possibly get any worse, the world suffers another massive blow. Gone too soon: The Mighty Segway. 2001 - 2020. This week we discuss the gadget that Tom has never actually ridden as he tries to convince Tim to go 50/50 on buying one with him before it’s too late.
28/06/201h 6m

Air Fryers

Science has done it again! They've finally figured out how to fry food without using oil, and what do they use instead? Air! Of all things. Wild stuff. There's one catch: these air fryers don't actually fry things. But they are a good way to quickly cook and heat up some garbage food, so naturally we're excited about them.Thanks to our sponsors this week:TRICO - Go to Wipers123.com and use promo code GUIDE at checkout and receive $10 off your next order or $40 or more.Sakara - They're offering our listeners 20% off their first order when they go to sakara.com/guide or enter code GUIDE at checkout.
21/06/201h 6m

Waterbeds

We’re here to answer your burning questions about waterbeds. Are they just for creeps or do normals have them? How much do they weigh? Can you get seasick on them? Can you fill them with something other than water? We don’t shy away from any of these questions this week, plus we go over some important waterbed history so who knows, maybe you’ll learn a thing or two?
14/06/201h 3m

Cryotherapy (Live in Chicago)

Black Lives Matter.Here are some ways you can help: https://blacklivesmatters.carrd.co/---Tim and Tom go and get frozen in a cryogenics lab, except instead of waking up in the far future they emerge 3 minutes later feeling like they nearly died. Also we solve an audience problem concerning a co-worker and Marika makes us prove who the real King of Chicago is. This show was recorded live before a studio audience in Chicago.
07/06/201h 7m

HBO Max

We overcome tremendous technical difficulties to bring to you and episode you probably don’t want: HBO Max. Come hear all of our thoughts about the newest streaming service that Tim and Tom share using Tom’s mom’s cable login.Also be sure to check out this week’s Patreon episode “The Great American Book Quiz” at patreon.com/completeguide
31/05/201h 9m

The Prom

Are you a teen that's bummed that you can't have your prom this year? Don't be! We'll explain why proms stink and share our own personal stories to prove it. Also, in this episode we talk a lot about waterbeds and hot tubs: two very cool things.
25/05/201h 4m

Video Conferencing Etiquette

The future is here and it’s called “video conferencing.” While it may seem like a sci-fi fantasy, the technology to speak face-to-face across a “video screen” has actually been a reality for years now. But the rules of normal polite society are often thrown out the window by people too blown away by the mechanical marvel that is “video conferencing.” This week we’ll be going over the do’s and don’ts of this brave new world. Also we solve a listener’s problems with flies.
18/05/201h 6m

80s Candy

The 1980s were a seminal decade for delicious candy that was also pretty disgusting. It was also a pretty good decade for kids being just unsupervised enough to buy and eat whatever candy they wanted without their parents or guardians really caring. This week we discuss the candy we ate in the 80s, and we also decide to get really into Korean baseball.
11/05/201h 5m

Cutting Your Own Hair

Desperate times call for desperate measures. This week we talk about how to cut your own hair, from using the ol’ scissors to fancy new fangled gadgets like the Flowbee. Also Tom talks about his new ice cream machine.
03/05/201h 5m

Sleeping

Love it or hate it, it's time to face facts -- we all gotta sleep! Every day, if possible. This week we're discussing all the things that happen when we turn out the lights and go unconscious for several hours each night. Also, Tom explains a harrowing bathroom mishap.
26/04/201h 2m

Moon Conspiracies

Did we ever really land on the moon? Is the moon made out of green cheese? Does the moon even exist in the first place? Or is it a hologram or a hollow spaceship? All of these are perfectly valid ideas that we explore this week. Also, a discussion of how depressing network television is right now.
19/04/201h 4m

Quibi

In an episode that's roughly 6-8 quibis long, we talk about the brand new streaming service that you have to watch on your phone. Enjoy this longbite in which we discuss the merits of a service that makes you pay for a bunch of short shows that aren't very good.
13/04/201h 6m

Tim and Tom Solve Your Problems Despite Everything Else Going On

We’re taking our mind off our own problems by solving some other people’s problems this week. From co-workers covering the smell of poop with perfume to roommates not washing their hands we pretty much cover every type of problem there is currently facing the world.
05/04/201h 6m

Animal Crossing

Join Timmy and Tommy as we guide you through the hottest Nintendo game of the moment, Animal Crossing. It takes us a while to get to the point, but just go with it and you'll hear a funny story about Tom being the star of a drugs competition along the way.
29/03/201h 5m

Self-Isolation

We try to keep it light considering the circumstances, but this week we’re talking all about the newest fad that’s sweeping the globe: staying inside all the time. On this special remote edition we offer up our best tips as to how to keep from going stir crazy while staying safe.
23/03/201h 11m

Key West (Part Two)

This week we bring you just what everyone needs right now: a guy recounting more of his recent vacation. That's right, Tom went to Key West and all his exciting tales couldn't be contained in just one hour. So sit back and enjoy hearing more about what Key West, Florida has to offer.This episode is sponsored by Sakara. Our listeners can get 20% off their first order when they go to sakara.com/guide or enter code GUIDE at checkout.
15/03/201h 6m

Key West (Part One)

This week Tom goes on vacation and you the listener gets to come along! Actually he went on vacation last week, but he’s back to tell you all about his week of fun in the sun in Key West, Florida. Mostly it’s about going on a ghost hunting tour. Okay, it’s entirely about going on a ghost hunting tour but that’s because Tom caught evidence of a REAL GHOST on camera. Next week we’ll he’ll discuss the rest.
08/03/201h 8m

Morning Routines

Mornings. Literally everybody hates them, but they come every single g.d. day and there's nothing we can do about it. This week we share the morning routines we follow to try to make that time of day less terrible and talk about what successful people recommend. Plus, Tom becomes obsessed with a trashy reality TV show.
02/03/201h 1m

Milk

Milk, milk, milk, it's all anyone can talk about anymore. But between cow's milk, almond milk, soy milk, rice milk, oat milk, and more how can you choose? I'll tell you how, by listening to this episode entitled simply "Milk." Also a frank and honestly overdue talk about Werther's Originals. Lastly we solve a problem involving mistaken identity in the workplace.
23/02/201h 5m

Playground Games

Hey, we were all kids once, and what do kids love to do? That's right, play games. And where do they play these games? Duh, on the grounds literally named for all the playing that's done on them (playgrounds). This week we cover a bunch of games. Do we talk about every single playground game? Of course not. That would be ridiculous. But we do the big ones: hide and seek, tag, freeze tag, TV tag, capture the flag, cops and robbers, and pretty much all the other hits, as well as some cooler, underground games that you've probably never even heard of. We also talk about horses.This episode is sponsored by Skillshare. Head to skillshare.com/guide and get 2 free months of premium membership.
16/02/201h 5m

Date Night

Valentine’s Day is coming up and you’re probably wondering where to go on a date with your significant other. Have no fear, because romance experts Tim and Tom are here to tell you about all the different types of dates there are as well as some ideas for dates for cheapskates. Also we talk about pooping your pants but it’s unrelated.
10/02/201h 3m

Brad Pitt

You know him as the handsome man from all the films, but you also know him as a guy who can look cool while eating an apple. That's right, this week we're talkin' Brad Pitt. From young hunk, to Hollywood elder statesman who is also a hunk, we cover his on and off screen life. We also discover a strange short film that cost $70 million to produce.
02/02/201h 8m

McDonaldland

A place of fun, fantasy and french fries: McDonaldland! This week we’re talking about the magical place that a corporation invented to sell poison to children. Also Tom spends over 5 hours in a theatre to see Harry Potter and the Cursed Child on Broadway.Gumball is the marketplace for advertisers to buy host-read ads directly from podcasters. To learn more visit gumball.fm/guideSakara’s organic, ready-to-eat meals are made with with powerful plant-based ingredients, and they are designed to boost your energy, improve your digestion, and get your skin glowing. Get 20% off your first order at sakara.com/guide
27/01/201h 2m

Insomnia

In these troubled times, sleeping can be hard. This week, we discuss all the ways you can shut your brain off for ten seconds so you can fall asleep and we also solve a problem from a lady whose housemate wants to steal her room. But first, some breaking news about Burt Ward.
20/01/201h 5m

Cats (2019)

This week Tom goes to see Cats: The Movie and it breaks his brain for good.
13/01/201h 0m

The State of Star Wars

Star Wars was a weird space movie from the late 70s that captured our hearts so hard that they're still cranking out new stuff decades later. This week we discuss some of that new stuff, namely the movie Star Wars: Episode IX - The Rise of Skywalker, the TV show The Mandalorian and the video game Star Wars Jedi: Fallen Order. Also, a frank discussion about mothmen.This episode is sponsored by Skillshare. Head to skillshare.com/guide and get 2 free months of premium membership.
05/01/201h 7m

New Year's Eve

Happy New Year! This week we’re talking about the night that everyone’s been waiting for: New Year’s Eve! Mostly we just talk about the various disastrous New Year’s Eves Tim and Tom have both had over their lives. It’s a lot of fun.
30/12/191h 6m

Cookies

This holiday season take some time off, relax, gather your loved ones, and listen to two grown men discuss cookies for an hour.
22/12/191h 4m

Hard to Find Holiday Toys

Here’s one holiday gift that’s not hard to find: a new episode of our show! This week we’re talking about Cabbage Patch Kids, Tickle Me Elmo, Furby, Teddy Ruxpin and all the other hard to find holiday toys over the past 30 years. Also some late breaking news about Billy Ripken’s 1989 Fleer baseball card.This episode is sponsored by Peloton. Go to onepeloton.com and use the code GUIDE to get $100 off accessories with the purchase of a Tread.
16/12/191h 7m

The Best Movies of the 2010s

It's the end of the decade, so it's time for two guys who love watchin' flicks weigh in on which movies captured our hearts over the last 10 years. Noted flicksmen Tim and Tom go through their top 10 movies of the decade (well, Tom only has a top 9 list due to a miscalculation) and only fight a little bit.Thanks to our sponsors this week:Kamikoto knives - Head to kamikoto.com/guide and use offer code GUIDE to get an extra 25% off sitewideSquarespace - Go to squarespace.com/guide for a free trial and when you're ready to launch use offer code GUIDE to save 10% on your first purchase of a website or domain
08/12/191h 20m

Papa John

In this special episode of TCGTE, we order a Papa John’s pizza and eat it (off-mic at Tim’s insistence) to see if the quality really has dropped as much as noted racist Papa John claims. Also Tim is menaced by a squirrel and we solve a problem about snooping on your neighbors using LinkedIn.
02/12/191h 12m

Disney+

The House of Mouse has entered the Streaming Wars! This week we're talking about Disney+, which includes the Mandalorian, Marvel, all the films that have been released from the Disney Vault and even the boring stuff like National Geographic.Thanks to our sponsor Dashlane. Start your 30 day free trial at www.dashlane.com/guide and if you like it, use code "guide" at checkout to save 20% on your premium subscription.
24/11/191h 7m

Role Playing Games

Some say we all have a role to play in this life, others say I’d rather be playing role playing games! Well we’re with the latter this week as we discuss role playing games. Also Tim gets an important and potentially life changing text message during the show, we see a dog play Jenga, talk about poop pills and Murphy beds. Also we solve a listener problem concerning running out of things to say in Spanish.Wildermyth is a tactical, story based indie RPG that has just launched on PC. Check out Wildermyth on Steam or go to wildermyth.com/guide to learn more!This episode is sponsored by Peloton. Go to onepeloton.com and use the code GUIDE to get $100 off accessories with the purchase of a Tread.
18/11/191h 7m

Coworking Spaces

We all gotta do work, right? But where should we go to do that work? Increasingly, people are choosing coworking spaces because of the flexibility, affordability and free alcohol. Also, did you know that autocorrect will sometimes change the word "coworking" too "cowering"?Thanks to our sponsors this week:ZipRecruiter - Try it for free at ziprecruiter.com/completeDashlane - Visit dashlane.com/guide to start your 30-day free trial - no credit card required.
10/11/191h 5m

Paul Rudd

He’s America’s favorite immortal boy: Paul Rudd. This week we’re going over his entire filmography as well as solving a listener problem concerning their carbon footprint.Head over to Squarespace.com/GUIDE for a free trial and when you’re ready to launch, use the offer code GUIDE to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain.
03/11/191h 7m

Tim and Tom's True Tales of Terror

For the thrilling conclusion of Halloween Month, we get personal and share our own terrifying tales from our lives. You wouldn't think that two guys who grew up in a middle class Long Island suburb would have encountered so much paranormal phenomena growing up, but the things we've seen will make your skin crawl. From UFOs to Mothmen, grisly murders to g-g-g-ghosts, we've seen it all. This week we finally break our silence and tell all.
27/10/191h 8m

Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde

Halloween Month continues this week as Tom reads the novella “The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde” by Robert Louis Stevenson and explains it to Tim. Also the boys spend a weekend away in the woods and Tim reads some personal insults Tom has sent him over the years.This episode is sponsored by Peloton. Go to onepeloton.com and use the code GUIDE to get $100 off accessories with the purchase of a Tread.Check out No Such Thing as a Fish on Apple Podcasts
20/10/191h 7m

The Legend of Sleepy Hollow

A man with no head riding a horse. What could be scarier than that?? Nothing, that's what. This week we talk about one of the scariest stories ever published: Washington Irving's The Legend of Sleepy Hollow. It's got the Headless Horseman, a goofball named Ichabod Crane, a surprising amount of long passages describing food and, because it was written in the 1800s, some inexcusable racism.This episode is sponsored by ZipRecruiter. Try it for free at ziprecruiter.com/complete.
13/10/191h 11m

Pumpkins

The gourd that we all adored, the savory treat that we like to eat, that’s right we’re talking all about the orange guys: pumpkins. Picking ‘em, carving ‘em, eating ‘em, heck even smashing them. It’s the triumphant return of the spookiest time of year: Halloween Month and we’re kicking it off talking all about these rotund rascals. Also Tim and Tom finally went to a Billy Joel concert together.Head over to Squarespace.com/GUIDE for a free trial and when you’re ready to launch, use the offer code GUIDE to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain.
06/10/191h 3m

Spas

Does your body hurt all day every day? Does the simple act of living your life put you in near constant physical pain? Well if so, you should head to a spa. This week, Tom recounts his recent trip to a spa including tales about how he almost got cooked alive and how he saw all types of different naked people.
29/09/191h 7m

Murder (Live in London)

This week we’re live in London talking about everyone’s favorite podcast topic: Murder! We talk about famous murderers, murdering each other, etc. It’s really a lot of lighthearted fun.Also we solve TWO listener problems live: a 19 year-old who is afraid she won’t be able to relate to 18 year-olds and a man trying to get a recruitment bounty.
22/09/191h 9m

Seltzer

The fizzy stuff! This week, we're talking about water with carbonation in it, or as we know it, seltzer. We cover it all, from the boring plain stuff, to the flavored versions and even the kind that will get you drunk.This episode is sponsored by Peloton. Go to onepeloton.com and use the code GUIDE to get $100 off accessories with the purchase of a Tread.
15/09/191h 4m

Packing

Time to pack your bags and hit the road, because this week that’s what we’re talking about: packing your bags and hitting road. Tim has an 11 day trip coming up, and Tom has a 3 day one so it’s time to start thinking about what to bring. How much is too much? How little is too little? Also we solve a listener problem concerning how to start getting people to call you a new, fake name.Head over to Squarespace.com/GUIDE for a free trial and when you’re ready to launch, use the offer code GUIDE to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain.
08/09/191h 7m

Naps

What do you do when you want to sleep, but not spend your whole day or night unconscious? Take a nap! This week, we discuss all things naps, but first Tom makes an apology (and then retracts that apology). We also solve a problem from a listener with a bad co-worker.
01/09/191h 11m

Generation X

The slackers that everyone loves to hate. That’s right, this week we’re talking all about the Baby Boomers’ second favorite target of ire, Generation X. Slackers, flannel shirts, grunge, working in a coffee shop, it’s all here as well as a frank discussion about pooping your pants.
25/08/191h 11m

Frozen Treats

According to the internet, we're smack dab in the middle of a "hot girl summer." How do you cool down during such a thing? Well, with some frozen treats. Listen as Tom goes off the rails trying to come up with a standard definition of frozen treats and constantly lashes out at Tim for trying to help. We also solve a problem from a listener who is headed to Salt Lake City, Utah.
18/08/191h 12m

Inbox Zero

Go from being an Email Zero to an Email Hero this week as we discuss the idea of Inbox Zero: aka keeping your email inbox completely empty all the time. Productivity and Lifestyle Guru Tim tells Tom all of his tips about a thing he’s been doing for less than a week.Head over to Squarespace.com/GUIDE for a free trial and when you’re ready to launch, use the offer code GUIDE to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain.
11/08/191h 10m

Babysitting

People everywhere are giving birth to children and committing to feeding and raising them but everyone keeps running into the same problem: what do you do when you have a baby or a small child and you want to go see a movie or hang out at a fancy cocktail bar? Well, it turns out you can hire babysitters. This week, two childless men in their thirties discuss how babysitting works. We also solve a problem from a listener who keeps becoming friends with his clients at work.LONDON! We're doing shows at the London Podcast Festival September 13 and 14. Get tickets at tcgte.com/live.
04/08/191h 12m

Dips

When I dip, you dip, we dip. And baby, this week we’re ALL dipping into dips, God’s favorite food. We count down the best dips, the worst dips, hell even the best stuff to dip IN dips. Also we solve a problem with a co-worker blocking a listener on Instagram so he can flirt with another co-worker. It’s less complicated than it sounds.
28/07/191h 15m

Hunks

Two non-hunks discuss the topic of hunks for an hour. We also solve a problem from a listener who doesn't want to get clowned by teens.
21/07/191h 5m

Tim and Tom Solve Your Problems For The Umpteenth Time

It’s problem solving week here at The Complete Guide to Everything which means we’re doing nothing but solving your problems for an entire hour straight. Unfortunately your problems are very complex so we’re only able to solve three of them, but they’re doozies.This week's episode is sponsored by Openfit. Get a special extended 30-day free trial by texting GUIDE to 303030.This episode is sponsored by ZipRecruiter. Try it for free at ziprecruiter.com/complete.
14/07/191h 8m

Spider-Man

Everybody's favorite half-boy/half-spider is back in theaters and we're talkin' about him! And not just the new movie, either (no spoilers until the end, with fair warning). We're also talking about the Spiderverse, and the 6000 other Spider-Man movies that came out in the last 20 years too. And of course, what discussion of Spider-Man would be complete without a lot of mentions of the seminal, character-defining Broadway musical, Spider-Man: Turn Off The Dark?This episode is sponsored by Squarespace. Go to squarespace.com/guide for a free trial and when you’re ready to launch, use the offer code GUIDE to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain.
07/07/191h 6m

Star Wars: Galaxy's Edge

This week we’re talking about the newest most magical place on Earth, Star Wars: Galaxy’s Edge. What could be so exciting that two grown childless men who don’t even particularly like Star Wars are considering spending their life savings just to go? Listen in and find out. Also for some reason we talk about religion a lot.This week’s episode is brought to you by The Complete Guide to Everything’s Patreon! Check out patreon.com/completeguide to learn how you can get a double dose of TCGTE in your life every week with Books: The Podcast and more.
30/06/191h 5m

Ballparks

Like the famous song says, "Take me out to the ballpark" and this week that's exactly what we're doing: we're taking you, the listener to the ballpark. Don't worry if you don't like sports, a day at the ballpark is about much more than watching some silly game. For example, sometimes you get a bobblehead doll and you can usually buy a large helmet full of nachos for slightly less than $20. We also solve a problem from a woman who thinks her interns need a wakeup call.This episode is sponsored by Stamps.com. Get a special offer that includes a 4-week trial PLUS free postage AND a digital scale without any long-term commitment by going to Stamps.com, clicking the microphone at the top of the homepage and entering the code GUIDE.
24/06/191h 5m

Iced Coffee

I scream, you scream, we all scream for iced… coffee?!?! It turns out that cream isn’t the only cool treat on a nice summer day, you can also ice a coffee. That’s right, you might know coffee as a hot drink but it can also be cold. This week we talk about iced coffee and it’s various new fangled incarnations such as cold brew, nitro brew, etc. You get the idea.If you’re a creator or artist of any kind — podcaster, writer, video creator, etc. — you’ve probably heard us talk about Patreon. Patreon powers membership businesses for creators like us by allowing our biggest fans to become paying patrons. Patreon is offering free phone consultations with their Creator Partnerships team - sign up at patreon.com/headgumIf you suffer from hair loss, the last thing you need is to wait to see a doctor. With Keeps, there’s finally a way to get the help you need when you need it. For a limited time, receive your first month of treatment for free, go to Keeps.com/GUIDE 
17/06/191h 6m

Radiohead

Want to listen to two men talk about a glum band for an hour? You've come to the right place! This week we're talking all about Radiohead and their music and tell the story of how they fostered a friendship between the hosts of this very podcast. We also solve a problem from a listener with a car conundrum.This week's episode is sponsored by Openfit. Get a special extended 30-day free trial by texting GUIDE to 303030.
09/06/191h 7m

Elton John

You’re the one who won’t still be standing when you listen to this week’s episode all about Sir Elton Hercules John. We haven’t seen the new movie about him but we didn’t need to because we already knew a bunch of stuff about him. Also we should probably warn you that a good chunk of this episode is about his bitter arch-rivalry with Elton John’s sworn frenemy Billy Joel.Head over to Squarespace.com/GUIDE for a free trial and when you’re ready to launch, use the offer code GUIDE to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain
02/06/191h 7m

Outdoor Summertime Activities

It's the unofficial start of the summer, so let two aspiring outdoorsmen tell you about all the wonderful things you can do in the sunshine. We also solve a problem from a bored diplomat!This episode is sponsored by ZipRecruiter. Try it for free at ziprecruiter.com/complete.
26/05/191h 15m

Keanu Reeves

John Wick: Chapter 3 opens this week so we’re talking all about Keanu Reeves, the world’s best man. We cover his movies, generosity and riding motorcycles like a cool guy!Stamps.com - for a 4-week trial plus free postage and a digital scale, go to stamps.com, click on the microphone at the top of the homepage and enter GUIDE.Lightstream - Refinance your credit card balances and save with a Credit Card Consolidation loan from LightStream. Check out lightstream.com/complete for an additional interest rate discount.
20/05/191h 17m

Coca-Cola

Coca-Cola, the sugar water that captured our hearts, turns 133 years young this week. We look at the history of that bubbly brown beverage, explore the New Coke debacle and debate whether McDonald's really has the best Coke. In this episode, Pepsi is NOT okay.
12/05/191h 10m

Avengers: Endgame

We’re in the Endgame now, Avengers: Endgame that is! If you’re looking to save yourself $15 seeing it, why not opt in for the next best thing: listening to Tom explain the movie to Tim, a man who has no interest in hearing about it. (We issue a warning once we get into spoiler territory, if you’re concerned about having the movie spoiled for you but also like to wait weeks and weeks before you go see it.)Head over to Squarespace.com/GUIDE for a free trial and when you’re ready to launch, use the offer code GUIDE to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain
05/05/191h 14m

Game Boy

Believe it or not, if you wanted to play video games before 1989 you had to do it while sitting at home like some kind of chump. That all changed with Nintendo's Game Boy, which appealed to little kids and traveling businessmen alike. On its 30th birthday, we celebrate the Game Boy, discuss the best games and for some reason we talk about its tech specs for a really long time.
28/04/191h 3m

Ridesharing

Brother can you share… a ride? This week we’re talking all about Lyft, Uber and all the other companies that offer ways to share rides in exchange for money. We’ll tell you how to use these services while only feeling mildly guilty and without being a jerk. Also we solve a listener problem about where to go on a solo vacation.Stamps.com - for a 4-week trial plus free postage and a digital scale, go to stamps.com, click on the microphone at the top of the homepage and enter GUIDE.Lightstream - Refinance your credit card balances and save with a Credit Card Consolidation loan from LightStream. Check out lightstream.com/complete for an additional interest rate discount.
21/04/191h 11m

Mayonnaise

Mayonnaise, nature's wettest condiment, can be a pretty divisive topic. People either love it or they hate it. Or they think it's okay. Anyway, this week we're talking all about that white goo you put on your sandwiches. From the history of mayo to Tom's highly sought-after mayo recipe, we cover it all. We also solve a problem from someone whose co-workers chew too loudly.Thanks to our sponsor, Robinhood. They're giving our listeners a FREE stock like Apple, Ford or Sprint to help you build your portfolio. Sign up at guide.robinhood.com.
14/04/191h 13m

Karaoke

What is this, amateur hour? It is when you’re singing karaoke! This week we’re talking all about the thing that people either really love or really hate: singing on-stage to a weird MIDI backing track while a bunch of drunk people look on. Also we solve a listener problem concerning an old man bagging their groceries too slowly.Head over to Squarespace.com/GUIDE for a free trial and when you’re ready to launch, use the offer code GUIDE to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain
07/04/191h 8m

Writing

Everyone wants to write a book, but nobody knows how! Well, some people do and one of them happens to be Tom, one of the hosts of this very podcast. In this episode, we talk about the writing process, give some tips & tricks, and somehow wind up in a conversation about alarm clocks.Oh, and head to Amazon and check out Tom's new book, Omni's Fall!
31/03/191h 3m

Smartphone Etiquette

Hey! Get off your damn phone! It’s rude! Oh, you’re using it to listen to this podcast? Ahhh, that’s fine then. Actually, pop out those headphones, let’s all take a listen! In this brave new world there are new rules about etiquette and we’re here to teach them to you. We also cover headphone/AirPods etiquette since we’re on the cutting edge. Make sure you stay tuned until the very end to hear the result of a dramatic bet between Tim and Tom around who uses their phone more. The results might shock you!Our sponsor this week is Marine Layer, makers of the softest clothes you’ve ever felt in your whole dang life. For 15% off your first order, visit marinelayer.com and enter offer code GUIDE at checkout!
24/03/191h 7m

Scooters

Have you heard about the hot new craze? Grown-ups riding scooters! The next billion-dollar tech industry tomfoolery involves motorized city scooters and we had some first-hand experience with them. Also, we talk about dental veneers and solve a problem about water bottles.Thanks to our sponsor, Robinhood. Robinhood is giving our listeners a free stock like Apple, Ford or Sprint to help you build your portfolio. Sign up at guide.robinhood.com.
18/03/191h 8m

Captain Marvel

10/03/191h 16m

CBD

Look, we're not drugs people but this week we're talking about something drugs-adjacent, so be cool. CBD, which is derived from dirty filthy drugs, is legal in the US and has somehow become the hottest new trend. Since we're essentially investigative journalists, we had to try it for ourselves and report back. Also, Tom talks way too much about how scared he is by Tim's fast driving.Thanks to our sponsors this week:Stamps.com - for a 4-week trial plus free postage and a digital scale, go to stamps.com, click on the microphone at the top of the homepage and enter GUIDE.ZipRecruiter - try ZipRecruiter for free at this exclusive web address: ziprecruiter.com/complete
03/03/191h 4m

Dunkin' Donuts

25/02/191h 8m

Libraries

Hey listen up, libraries aren't just for bookworms anymore! They have VHS tapes, CDs and sometimes video games. Sure, the librarians will shush you if you get too out of control, but there are still ways you can have some fun in a library. This week we reminisce about our library experiences like a couple of old bores. This episode is sponsored by Robinhood. They're giving listeners of The Complete Guide to Everything a FREE stock like Apple, Ford, or Sprint to help you build your portfolio. Sign up at guide.robinhood.com.
17/02/191h 6m

Meditation

In today’s mixed-up, topsy-turvy, herky-jerky world sometimes it’s important to take a minute and give your gosh dang brain a break. That’s where meditation comes in. This week we’re talking about all of it. Mindfulness? Yes. Guided? You bet. Transcendental? You know it! Also this week Tom asks Tim a very important question.STAMPS.com Use our special offer GUIDE that includes a 4-week trial PLUS free postage AND a digital scale. See for yourself why over 700,000 small businesses use Stamps.com. Just go to Stamps.com, click on the Microphone at the TOP of the homepage and type in GUIDEHead over to Squarespace.com/GUIDE for a free trial and when you’re ready to launch, use the offer code GUIDE to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain
11/02/191h 8m

BONUS - Books: The Podcast Episode 1

In the premiere episode of Books: The Podcast, we kick things off with F. Scott Fitzgerald's The Great Gatsby. Tim teaches Tom all about the bond market, the Great War and how during the Roarin' Twenties it was apparently fine to flirt with your cousin.
07/02/1927m 33s

Keeping Warm

It's cold outside and everyone is losing their dang minds. Well, great news! We have the perfect solution to the cold weather: warmth. This week we'll tell you how to keep warm. We also discuss whether or not the wind chill is an actual thing and if you should wear underwear beneath long johns.
03/02/191h 4m

The Sopranos

What in the gabagool!?! That’s right, this week we’re talking all about the show that turns 20 years old this week and changed television forever: The Sopranos. Tim likes it so much that he read a book about it even. A book about a TV show, what’ll they think of next huh folks? Tom’s seen a few episodes here and there as well.This week’s episode is brought to you by the official launch of our brand new show Books: The Podcast available exclusively through the TCGTE Patreon. Each week on Books: The Podcast we’ll be diving deep into one of the many old and modern day classics. Tim and Tom switch off book for book and have to explain the book to the other, then at the end we watch a movie based on it and see how they measure up. We’re kicking things off with a classic The Great Gatsby, as read by Tim. Check out tcgte.com/pledge for more information and to listen to the first episode for free!
28/01/191h 10m

Instant Pot

The Instant Pot is the hottest new kitchen gadget for lazy people, which is right in our wheelhouse. This week we're talking about cooking your own food in weird new ways, and reveal too much about our horrible diets.Thanks to our sponsor Robinhood. They're giving listeners a FREE stock like Apple, Ford, or Sprint to help build your portfolio! Sign up at guide.robinhood.com.
20/01/191h 12m

Sully (Episode 500)

It’s our 500th episode and what better way to celebrate than having two heroes (Tim and Tom) pay tribute to another hero, Captain Chesley Burnett “Sully” Sullenberger III, the US Airways pilot responsible for the Miracle on the Hudson 10 years ago this week after two goddamn birds tried to take everything away from him. While we have long admired Sully, neither of us had ever watched his movie despite it starring Tom Hanks, another longtime hero. Wow, four heroes in one show. We really pulled out all the stops for this one. We even had a few famous names call in to congratulate us, despite our insistence that we’re not heroes. Not compared to Sully at least. We’re probably heroes compared to a lot of other people though. Anyway, it’s our 500th episode.Squarespace: Go to squarespace.com/guide for a free trial and when you’re ready to launch, use the offer code GUIDE to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain.
14/01/191h 35m

Getting Organized

It's a new year, so it's a perfect opportunity to get organized! Look, I don't want to talk out of school here, but a lot of us have been talking, and the consensus is that you really need to get your life together. Don't worry, we can help. Listen for all the tips and tricks you'll need from two organizational masterminds. Also, Tom makes a bizarre confession in a new installment of The Mundane Bucket List.Thanks to this week's sponsor ZipRecruiter. Try it for free at ziprecruiter.com/guide.
06/01/191h 2m

2018 Year in Review

Another year, another installment of The Completies, an annual awards show that we have done many, many times before. This year we give out some awards for TV shows and movies we liked and complain about news anchors being in movies.As an added bonus, you can start this episode at 10:56:08pm on New Years Eve and ring in the New Year live with us if you’ve ever wanted to listen to us talk right before having a big ol’ french kissing.
31/12/181h 9m

Wrapping Gifts

It's the holiday season and that means we have to give people gifts, which kinda stinks. But we all know the worst part is wrapping those gifts. This week we're talking about wrapping gifts.Thanks to our sponsors this week:Squarespace: Go to squarespace.com/guide for a free trial and when you’re ready to launch, use the offer code GUIDE to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domainRobinhood: They're giving listeners a FREE stock like Apple, Ford, or Sprint to help build your portfolio. Sign up at guide.robinhood.com.
24/12/181h 4m

Christmas Movies

Christmastime is here. Time to watch some Christmas movies. This week we go over Rotten Tomatoes incredibly suspect list of the top 50 Christmas movies of all time. We talk Home Alone, we talk Muppets, we talk Batman, it’s all in here along with opinions of people who say Die Hard is their favorite Christmas movie. Gather round the family and put this on television as it too is soon to join the pantheon of Christmas classics.We're sponsored this week by Quip. Get your first refill pack free with a Quip electric toothbrush if you go to quip.com/guide.eero - Never think about WiFi again - Get $100 off the 'eero base unit and 2 beacons package’ and 1 year of eero Plus, visit eero.com/tcgte and at checkout enter ‘tcgte’.
17/12/181h 12m

Gift Giving Etiquette

It's the holiday season, so that means giving and receiving gifts, which sounds pretty easy but can sometimes be complex because nobody actually likes giving gifts to other people and most gifts you get kinda stink. How do you deal with these awkward or annoying situations? Let us fill you in, with some help from the ghost of Emily Post.Thanks to our sponsors this week:Butcher Box - For free bacon and $20 off your first box, go to ButcherBox.com/guide and enter promo code GUIDE.Squarespace - Go to squarespace.com/guide and when you're ready to launch, use offer code GUIDE to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain.
09/12/181h 5m

Dogs

Dogs! Everyone’s favorite four-legged friends. But what do we really know about them? It turns out that we know a lot and we discuss that this week. From the depressing origin of the phrase “raining like cats and dogs” to Tom’s story of meeting his dog in human form inside of a dream, we cover it all.Molekule is a complete reinvention of the air purifier, not just an improvement on existing, outdated technology. For $75 off your first order, visit MOLEKULE.comand at checkout enter GUIDE.The Great Courses - Grab a digital copy of Fundamentals of Photography for Only $9.99 or get unlimited access to enjoy this course, and so much more– with a special FREE TRIAL to The Great Courses Plus exclusively at TheGreatCoursesPlus.com/Guide.We're also sponsored this week by Quip. Get your first refill pack free with a Quip electric toothbrush if you go to quip.com/guide.
03/12/181h 8m

King Kong The Musical

We took a field trip to Broadway this week, to visit the biggest ape in the world: King Kong. There was singing, dancing and a big puppet, so needless to say we were intrigued. Also, they were selling very expensive booze at the theater, so we tried that too.Thanks to our sponsors this week:The Great Courses - Grab a digital copy of Fundamentals of Photography for Only $9.99 or get unlimited access to enjoy this course, and so much more– with a special FREE TRIAL to The Great Courses Plus exclusively at TheGreatCoursesPlus.com/Guide.Robinhood - They're giving listeners a FREE stock like Apple, Ford, or Sprint to help build your portfolio! Sign up at guide.robinhood.com.
25/11/181h 11m

Stan Lee

This week, a tribute to Stan “The Man” Lee. Co-creator of Spider-Man, the X-Men, Iron Man, Thor, the Hulk, the Fantastic Four, Black Panther, Daredevil, Doctor Strange, Ant-Man, Silver Surfer, Doctor Doom and more! We drown our sorrows in wine while discussing Stan’s contributions to comic books and pop culture as well as his numbers film cameos.This week’s episode is sponsored by The Great Courses. Grab a digital copy of Fundamentals of Photography for Only $9.99 or get unlimited access to enjoy this course, and so much more– with a special FREE TRIAL to The Great Courses Plus exclusively at TheGreatCoursesPlus.com/Guide.Squarespace - Check Out Squarespace.com/guide for a free trial and when you’re ready to launch, use the offer code GUIDE to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain.We're also sponsored this week by Quip. Get your first refill pack free with a Quip electric toothbrush if you go to quip.com/guide.
19/11/181h 2m

Las Vegas

As the swingers in the famous movie The Swingers said, "Las Vegas, baby!" That's what we're talking about this week because Tom went to Vegas and has bravely decided to break the law and disclose what happened there. And what happened in Vegas? Well, Tom had a terrible time. On an unrelated note, Tim went to a taping of his favorite TV show (not in Las Vegas) and had the best time.Thanks to our sponsors this episode:eero - Never think about WiFi again - Get $100 off the 'eero base unit and 2 beacons package’ and 1 year of eero Plus, visit eero.com/tcgte and at checkout enter ‘tcgte’.Squarespace - Check Out Squarespace.com/guide for a free trial and when you’re ready to launch, use the offer code GUIDE to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain.
11/11/181h 2m

Red Dead Redemption 2

Red Dead Redemption 2. The third Red Dead game, and the prequel to Red Dead Redemption 1. Confusing? Yes. That’s why you need to listen to this episode. Basically it’s an incredibly popular game where you get to pretend you’re a cowboy and become good friends with a horse which you can name yourself. There’s also baths.This week’s episode is sponsored by The Great Courses. Grab a digital copy of Outsmart Yourself for Only $9.99 or get unlimited access to enjoy this course, and so much more– with a special FREE TRIAL to The Great Courses Plus exclusively at TheGreatCoursesPlus.com/Guide.We're also sponsored this week by Quip. Get your first refill pack free with a Quip electric toothbrush if you go to quip.com/guide.
05/11/181h 3m

Dracula

As we conclude Halloween Month, we take a look at the original scary dude, Dracula. And even though you think doing research on Dracula would be fun and spooky, we learned the hard way that the original source material that introduces this guy who is undead, sucks blood and can turn into a bat and a wolf-thing, is actually kinda boring. Tom read Bram Stoker's original book and Tim watched the 1931 Bela Lugosi-starring movie (a totally fair division of work), so we have a lot to share.
29/10/181h 5m

Fright Fest

Halloween Month continues to bring thrills and chills, and this week we’re leaning heavily on the thrills part. Tim and Tom go to Six Flags: Great Adventure to experience the best of both at Fright Fest. Roller coasters, zombies, werewolves, haunted houses, chainsaws, it’s all here this week along with exclusive footage of Tom getting repeatedly scared in haunted houses.This week’s episode is sponsored by The Great Courses. Grab a digital copy of Outsmart Yourself for Only $9.99 or get unlimited access to enjoy this course, and so much more– with a special FREE TRIAL to The Great Courses Plus exclusively at TheGreatCoursesPlus.com/Guide.
21/10/181h 12m

Frankenstein

Halloween Month continues this week with a look at one of history's greatest monsters, Frankenstein. "But Frankenstein is the doctor, not the monster," you say, trying to be clever. Well guess what, pal? We were talking about the doctor. You see, the doctor IS the monster because he created a monster. The monster he created? Frankenstein.Anyway, Tom read the classic book and Tim watched the classic movie, so this week we're comparing notes. Give it a listen... if you dare!
14/10/181h 8m

Trick or Treating

Trick or treat, smell my feet, give me something good… to listen to? Well, you’re in luck because this week’s episode is a humdinger all about trick or treating! We talk about tricks, treats, souling, the strange, heavily Canadian history of trick or treating and kick off Halloween Month on The Complete Guide to Everything.quip starts at just $25 and if you go to getquip.com/guide right now, you get your first refill pack for FREE with a quip electric toothbrushThis episode is sponsored by Squarespace. Head to squarespace.com/GUIDE for a free trial and when you're ready to launch, use the offer code GUIDE to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain.
07/10/181h 1m

Delis

The two of us can't get enough meats, cheeses and prepared salads. And that's why we spend most of our times in delis. This week we're talking about what makes delis so dang delicious.This episode is sponsored by Robinhood. They're giving listeners a FREE stock like Apple, Ford or Sprint to help build your portfolio. Sign up at guide.robinhood.com.
01/10/181h 4m

Tipping

Tipping. Gratuity. A means to show “gratitude” through the universal language of cold, hard cash. This week we’re talking all about tipping. How to do it. When to do it. Why to do it. As expected, Tim attacks Tom’s character with no evidence throughout this episode. Also we solve a listener problem from a guy who doesn’t want to run into his land owner and his wife in the kitchen every 15 minutes. It makes more sense in the episode.
23/09/181h 3m

The Predator

The Predator is a vicious alien that hunts people for sport and that Tom loves talking about. This week we discuss the Predator franchise, but mostly about the first classic movie full of all your favorite musclebound hunks.
17/09/181h 1m

Microwaves

Macrowaves? NO! Microwaves! They’re a type of wave that can kinda cook food or make it hot at least and they’re what we’re talking about this week. Like most episodes, this is another one where we just can’t stop talking about magnetrons. We also talk about inflation and damaging your DNA.This week’s episode is sponsored by MyBookie. Visit MyBookie Online today and use the promo code GUIDE when creating your account to match your deposit dollar for dollar.This week’s episode is sponsored by Bluechew. Visit bluechew.com and get your first shipment free when use promo code GUIDE. Just pay $5 shipping.
09/09/181h 5m

Netflix 2: More Netflix

If you thought we covered everything there was to know about Netflix on last week's episode, you're dead wrong. (Mostly because we just talked about Blockbuster Video for the most part.) This week we're talking more about Netflix, specifically their millions and millions of original series. Also, Tom is dealing with a serious refrigerator issue.This episode is sponsored by Squarespace. Head to squarespace.com/GUIDE for a free trial and when you're ready to launch, use the offer code GUIDE to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain.We're also sponsored by MyBookie. Visit MyBookie Online today and use the promo code GUIDE when creating your account to match your deposit dollar for dollar.
03/09/181h 2m

Netflix

We’re talking Netflix baby! Actually we talk a lot about Blockbuster video too, but Blockbuster can’t compete with the newest idea: DVDs in the mail! They’ve also got this crazy idea about streaming video that might just be wacky enough to work. Also we solve a problem about a nuisance cousin following a listener around the world.
26/08/181h 7m

Salads

We bet you think salads are just boring bowls of lettuce and other stuff you'd never want to eat under normal circumstances. And guess what? You're wrong. Well, half wrong. This week we're talking about all the different types of salad out there and some of the salads we discuss may shock you. Also, Tim has the summertime blues and we talk about Tom's diving prowess.Come see us at the London Podcast Festival on September 14th 2018. Tickets at tcgte.com/live!
19/08/181h 8m

Running

This week we’re talking all about walking… FAST that is. That’s right: running. You’ve heard about it, you’ve thought about it, you’ve maybe even seen other people doing it and thought: hey, that looks like fun but where would I even start? Here. Here is where you would start. Along with running, we also talk about the Lockhorns, Tim never having had the wind knocked out of him and we answer a question about Chipotle in France.Mack Weldon will be the most comfortable underwear, socks, shirts, undershirts, hoodies and sweat pants and more that you will ever wear. For 20% off your first order, visit mackweldon.com and enter promo code: GUIDE at checkout.A second TCGTE show has been added to the London Podcast Festival! Tickets on sale now for Friday, Sept. 14 at 7pm @ tcgte.com/live 
12/08/181h 7m

Tom Cruise

Is Tom Cruise the world's greatest movie star? You bet your butt he is, and this week we're talking about his movies, his magnetic personality and his crazy ride on that glamorous roller coaster we call Tinseltown (Hollywood, California). We also talk about whether Cameron Diaz is retired, question whether Katie Holmes speaks in Stevie Wonder lyrics and finally address Tim Robbins' height.
05/08/181h 8m

Bar Trivia (Pub Quizzes)

Imagine going to a place to drink and instead being bombarded with questions. Welcome to the world of Bar Trivia, aka Pub Quizzes.
29/07/181h 5m

The Current Political Climate

Look, we're not gonna sugarcoat it: considering the state of affairs in the world today, we need to talk about some serious stuff. This week we delve into the current political climate and discuss the big topics on everybody's mind.This episode is sponsored by LightStream. Our listeners can get an additional interest rate discount on top of LightStream's already low rates by going to lightstream.com/complete.We're also sponsored this week by Quip. Get your first refill pack free with a Quip electric toothbrush if you go to quip.com/guide.
22/07/181h 1m

Security

Security breach! Security breach! Haha, just kidding! This week we're talking all about how to keep things secure. Look, we both had different ideas about what the topic "Security" would entail, but in the end this is mostly just us arguing about a machine that hard boils eggs.
15/07/181h 3m

Heat Waves

It's hot outside! We're talking about all the things: how to beat the heat, what kind of fans exist and stuff that happens in pools. Also, Tom tells one of his famous "Only In New York" stories and we solve a problem from a listener about pants!This week's episode is sponsored by Squarespace. Check squarespace.com/guide for a free trial and when you're ready to launch use the offer code GUIDE to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain.
08/07/181h 7m

Fireworks

Bing! Pow! Kabloey! You guessed it, this week we’re talking about fireworks. With the Fourth of July right around the corner, you need to know how to buy fireworks, light fireworks or at the very least watch fireworks. This week’s episode covers all of that and a story about tree sap.quip starts at just $25 and if you go to getquip.com/guide right now, you’ll get your first refill pack FREE with a QUIP electric toothbrush.Lower the interest rate on your credit card debt with a Credit Card Consolidation Loan from LightStream. Get an additional interest rate discount on top of LightStream’s already low rates at lightstream.com/complete Subject to credit approval. Rate includes 0.50% AutoPay discount. Terms and conditions apply and offers are subject to change without notice. Visit lightstream.com for more information.
02/07/181h 4m

Movie Theaters

There are lots of different types of movie theaters, and in this episode we discuss some of 'em! We also talk about MoviePass, the perils of popcorn and brushing your teeth at work. (That last thing doesn't have much to do with movie theaters.)London! Come see us live in London as part of the London Podcast Festival on September 15. Get tickets at tcgte.com/live
24/06/181h 5m

Casinos

Roll the dice! Spin the wheel! Pull the lever! That’s right, it’s casino time. The most depressing places on earth can sometimes also be the most fun. This week we’re talking all about how to win big and avoid the pit boss at all costs.London! We’re coming to see you as part of the London Podcast Festival at Kings Place. Tickets are on sale now at tcgte.com/live for our one and only London show on September 15th at 9:30pm. Grab ‘em while they’re hot!Also be sure to check out our friends’ new-ish podcast, The BrainFood Show. The BrainFood Show is a podcast brought to you by the team behind the wildly popular TodayIFoundOut YouTube channel. The podcast does deep dives into historical curiosities- everything from how famed enlightenment thinker Voltaire made his fortune by helping to rig the lottery to that time Julius Caesar was captured by pirates and the hilarity that ensued… on iTunes at https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-brainfoodshow/id1350586459
17/06/181h 4m

Jurassic Park

In anticipation of Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom, we're looking back at the movie that started it all (well, if you ask Tom he claims the book is better): 1993's Jurassic Park.This episode is sponsored by quip. Go to getquip.com/guide to get your first refill pack free with a quip electric toothbrush.We're also brought to you by Audible. Start a 30 day trial and your first audiobook is free. Go to audible.com/guide or text "guide" to 500-500.
11/06/181h 3m

Grifters

Grifts! Confidence Tricks! Long cons! Short cons! It’s all covered to varying degrees this week and Tim reveals the titles of the 11 movies he’s seen.This episode is sponsored by Squarespace. Check out squarespace.com/guide for a free trial and use offer code GUIDE to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or a domain.
03/06/181h 3m

Graduation

It's that time of year again, when we welcome a new crop of grads to the world. This week, Tim and Tom talk graduation ceremonies, the graduation songs we all know and love and the experience of leaving school and never looking back. Also, Tim is very tired for some reason.
28/05/181h 1m

Royal Wedding: Prince Hank Edition

This week we’re talking all about the royals. Kings, queens, princes, princesses, all of that nonsense because guess what: one of them is getting married! To an American! Also, the results are in from the TCGTE Best Place to Live 2018 contest.ForHims.com - A one-stop shop for hair loss, skincare, sexual wellness, for men. Get a trial month of hims for just $5 today right now at forhims.com/guidequip starts at just $25 and if you go to getquip.com/guide right now, you’ll get your first refill pack FREE with a QUIP electric toothbrush.
20/05/181h 7m

Life Problems

It's another week of Tim & Tom Solve Your Problems! Listeners sent in their problems and we're gonna solve 'em!This episode is sponsored by Squarespace. Check out squarespace.com/guide for a free trial and use offer code GUIDE to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or a domain.
14/05/181h 1m

Romantic Problems

This week we’re concentrating 100% on solving the romance problems of our listeners, because we’re good listeners. And answerers.This episode is sponsored by Squarespace. Check out squarespace.com/guide for a free trial and use offer code GUIDE to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or a domain.
06/05/181h 4m

Lunch

Lunch: the ol' second meal of the day that people can't seem to get enough of. This week, we're digging in on lunch. Also, Tom receives a birthday gift.
30/04/181h 3m

A Primer to Avengers: Infinity War

The end of an era is almost upon us as Marvel’s Phase 3 comes to the beginning of the end with Avengers: Infinity War. This week we’re offering a valuable primer to anyone who does know their Spider-Man from their Spider-Ham so you can go into the movie theater not wondering who the hell all these people are. There are no spoilers in this episode for Infinity War, lots of spoilers for every movie leading up to it.ForHims.com- A one-stop shop for hair loss, skincare, sexual wellness, for men. Get a trial month of hims for just $5 today right now at forhims.com/guide.
22/04/181h 6m

Fortnite

Tom loves this video game Fortnite Battle Royale so much that he insisted on talking about it for an hour. So that's what we're doing this week.This episode is sponsored by Squarespace. Check out squarespace.com/guide for a free trial and use offer code GUIDE to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or a domain.
16/04/181h 3m

French Fries

Whether you call them French Fries, Freedom Fries, chips or just potatoes, this week they’re what we’re talking about. Tim gives his top 11 tops of French Fries, we discuss the various toppings available and Tom issues an apology for last week’s episode.
08/04/181h 7m

Steven Spielberg

We devote an episode to celebrating the work of Steven Spielberg, a dreamer of dreams, on the eve of the most anticipated film of his career. So sit back, relax and prepare to learn all about Jaws and the rest from two guys who know a thing or two about Hollywood. 
02/04/181h 8m

Toys R Us: RIP

Et tu, Geoffrey? This week we’re talking about everyone’s favorite toy store being shut down, as well as a discussion of liquidating vs. liquifying. We also solve a listener problem about how to make friends at work when you’re stuffed off in a corner.
26/03/181h 4m

March Madness

Helloooooo basketball fans! This week, a couple of basketballers will tell you the best way to fill out your March Madness brackets, and explain the fundamentals of college basketball to all you noobs out there. We also solve a problem from a fella who has a million nightmare roommates.
19/03/181h 7m

Hawaii

This week we're talking all about the 50th state: Hawaii. It's a place Tim recently went to without inviting Tom where he almost died numerous times. In this episode we forget to talk about Don Ho, a mistake that will haunt both of us to our graves.
11/03/181h 3m

Universal Studios

Hooray for Hollywood! That's kind of our unofficial motto around here, and this week we finally make good on it.Tim recounts his recent trip to Universal Studios in Hollywood, California, we both detail our long history with the park and in case you're worried we wouldn't talk about the RIDES and ATTRACTIONS, let us tell you this: we talk about the RIDES and ATTRACTIONS.This episode is sponsored by Warby Parker. Head to warbyparker.com/guide to order your free home try-on box.This episode is also sponsored by ZipRecruiter. Our listeners can try ZipRecruiter for free at ziprecruiter.com/complete.
05/03/181h 5m

Oscars 2018

It's time once again for the stars to come out in Hollywood! This week we're talking about The Oscars themselves, who will win and who will go home feeling like a complete and utter loser. Also we discuss MoviePass, a scam you should get in on before it's too late!
26/02/181h 3m

Hotels

Learn about hotels from two jet setters who have stayed at their share of swanky places, believe me. From Motel 6 to the Ritz Carlton, we cover it all and even offer a free continental breakfast (ha ha, just kidding). Also, Tom's hoarse from Billy Joel karaoke and Tim gets a rare bout of FOMO.
19/02/181h 1m

Romance

Valentines Day is right around the corner, so we’re here just in time to tell you all about how to be very romantic. Also, an update on the plan to start sending all of our garbage into outer space.
12/02/181h 3m

Tea

We all love tea, right? A little bit of the ol' leaves in water? Well, steep yourself a cup, strap in and listen to two tea fans talk tea. From green to black, hot to iced, we cover it all! Also: an app recommendation that will remind you about death.
05/02/181h 2m

Cryptocurrency

Wanna get rich? Then sit back and let us tell you the fastest, easiest way to get richer than you ever imagined: CRYPTOCURRENCY. This week we blab about bitcoin and blockchain, and Tom details how the crypto boom is changing his life. We also talk about roller coasters, tech bros and the best way to hide lewd pictures in your home.
29/01/181h 4m

Driving Etiquette

Learn all about the rules of the road from two ol’ road warriors who themselves are Master Drivers.. There’s also a discussion of the plot of the hot new movie Regarding Henry and Tim proposes turning Tom into a baby through surgery and then adopting him.
22/01/181h 2m

Fad Diets

Looking to lose a bunch of weight without doing any work? Great news! It's totally possible. There are these things called "fad diets" that work like a charm. You can tell because we've tried a few and we're in great shape! So listen up as we go through some popular fad diets and explain exactly how they work, and get ready to see immediate weight loss results. Also, we talk about what the proper etiquette is when a millennial takes your picture on the subway.
15/01/181h 3m

He-Man

He-Man and the Masters of the Universe! This week we’re talking about Tom’s favorite muscular hunk from when he was a child. Also, Tim gives his honest thoughts about Muppet Babies and we both with Benji Madden and Cameron Diaz a happy wedding anniversary.
08/01/181h 3m

2018

PRO TIP: Start listening to this episode on December 31st at 11:46:08 to ring in the New Year with us!Join us as we say goodbye to 2017, and welcome 2018 which is sure to be much better. We'll give you some things to look forward to in the new year, like the Olympics, a royal wedding and a weird spaceflight thing. We'll also give you our expert predictions for what celebrities will have a big 2018 and provide some important information for the elderly.
31/12/171h 6m

UFOs and The Pentagon: A Christmas Spectacular

This week our colleagues at the New York Times blow the lid off of a secret Pentagon program investigating Unidentified Flying Objects and we’re here to report on their reporting. Also Tim is very hungry and we sing some Christmas carols for you, the listener.Glowing Auras and ‘Black Money’: The Pentagon’s Mysterious U.F.O. Program
25/12/171h 0m

Snakes

Snakes! Some people love 'em, some people hate 'em, but we can all agree on one thing: those things sure can slither! This week we discuss all things snake, but first Tom has a thrilling encounter with his old mailman.
18/12/171h 2m

Holiday Gift Guide 2017

Looking for something for everyone on your list? Well you've come to the right place, as long as what you're looking for is one of the handful of children's toys we talk about. We also solve a listener problem concerning moving across country to live with your girlfriend and their three polyamorous roommates.
11/12/171h 3m

Broadway

These boys are bonkers for Broadway! This week Tim and Tom discuss all the Broadway shows they've seen, including Tim's recent trip to Hamilton, the popular rapping musical about history. Tom also talks about his track and field prowess and we debate whether cartoon animals are better than real-life animals.
04/12/171h 2m

Tim and Tom Solve Your Problems Whether You Want Them To or Not

Tom has a crappy week this week where he breaks bones, has the mailman ring his doorbell close to the Witching Hour itself, and gets ripped off on a Bigfoot documentary. Then the guys decide to spend an hour of their lives solving the problems of others as a way to give back.This week they solve a problem of a boy with a crush on an older lady, a librarian whose name no one can remember, and a student who doesn’t want his dad to open a fast food restaurant at his college.
27/11/171h 0m

Justice League

Apparently, some of the most popular superheroes–including Superman, Batman and Wonder Woman–have gotten together and made a movie! This week we'll talk about that movie, as well as the history of this so-called league of justice, or Justice League, and its members.
20/11/171h 3m

Tacos

This week we’re Talkin’ Tacos with Tim and Tom. You’ll hear all about the saddest meal Tom’s ever made, the Top Ten Tacos Tips and Toppings, and Tom’s off-brand Pac-Man sheets.
13/11/171h 3m

Super Mario

Nintendo's main dude Mario has a new game out, and we're talkin' about it. But if you think we're just gonna cover Super Mario Odyssey, you're so wrong it's pathetic. From Donkey Kong to the Super Mario Brothers Super Show, you'll learn literally everything there is to know about the original Super Man, Mario. But first, we talk for about 20 minutes about a burrito.
06/11/171h 2m

Exorcisms

The final terrifying week of Oct-BOO-SCARE, the scariest month of the year. Before we talk scary though, bring your kids in the room to hear Tim’s tale of seeing the gang from Sesame Street out in the real world. Then send your kids out of the room when we talk all about the process of eliminating demons from possessed people!
30/10/171h 2m

Halloween Costumes

Every year people dress up in costumes for Halloween, but nobody knows why. That mystery goes unsolved in this episode, but we do talk about costumes we've dressed in, the most popular 2017 costumes and the reason why the MASH theme song is so depressing. Tom also sees a favorite old piano man at a television taping.
23/10/1759m 58s

Men in Black (Myths & Legends)

This week, another installment of Myths & Legends: Men in Black. Tim has trouble differentiating fantasy (the Men in Black movies) with reality (the men in black who visit people after UFO sightings and are aliens, government agents, and/or robots) but Tom does his best to fill him in on this very real menace.
16/10/171h 2m

Robbing A Bank

Nobody should ever rob a bank. Let's get that out of the way. That includes you, dear listener. But the sad truth is that there are some sickos out there that rob banks all the time. Thousands of times a year, in fact. This week we talk about all things bank robbery related, from passing notes to the teller to hiring the right getaway driver.
08/10/171h 4m

Whole Foods

Hey, HOLD the foods? I don’t think so! That’s right, you’ve guessed it, this week we’re talking about Whole Foods. The latest acquisition from bald-headed mastermind Jeff Bezos. Also we solve a listener email from a vegan looking to use dating apps to make vegan friends.
01/10/171h 4m

Sunday Roast

This week we’re back from the United Kingdom having conquered one of Tim’s biggest fears: Sunday Roast. We’ve finally been to one and have a lot of thoughts about them, which we talked about into microphones and recorded and turned into this episode.
25/09/171h 1m

2017 Fall TV Preview

“Hey, what’s on the boob tube?” That’s the question on everybody’s mind this time of year, and luckily you have Tim and Tom to guide you through the new fall TV offerings. With the help of a little website called TV Guide dot com (perhaps you’ve heard of it?), we take you through literally every new show on network TV this year, except for the shows we didn’t have time to get to.
18/09/171h 2m

Potato Chips

Whether you call them chips or crisps, these things are delicious. This week we're talking about it all: different flavors of chips, history of chips and those weird low-fat chips that made oil seep out of your butt. 
10/09/171h 3m

Van Life (aka #vanlife)

Living in a van is no longer considered hitting absolute rock bottom and we're gonna talk about it. This is also Tim's last episode as a single man and serves as his bachelor party.
04/09/171h 7m

Saved By The Bell

Zack, Kelly, Slater, Jesse, Lisa and Screech (and to a lesser extent, Tori) are the teens who inspired a generation to go to school, eat hamburgers served by a magician, abuse caffeine pills, line up at the mall to score tickets to George Michael concerts, build AI robots (but only bring them around once in a while), cheat on each other with each other, make fake IDs to sneak into over-18 dance clubs, start bands that only play weird 80s ballads at school dances, hold radio legend Casey Kasem in bizarrely high regard, call their distracted fathers using giant cell phones to ask "Is this the only way I can get through to you?" and constantly display disgusting levels of disrespect towards their beleaguered school principals. This week we're talking about the whole Bayside gang from Saved By The Bell.
27/08/171h 10m

Sonic The Hedgehog

This week we're talking about one of the fastest hedgehogs around, Sonic. He's everybody's favorite little ring-collecting blue guy to draw disturbing pictures of and post to the internet. We discuss Sonic's origins, what kind of kids own each video game system and Michael Jackson. We also solve a problem about a couple dogs that is so disturbing that we almost end this show forever.
20/08/171h 4m

The Sun

Can’t live with it, can’t live without it. That’s right, we’re talking about The Sun. That big ol’ ball o’ fire way up there in the sky. How high up in the sky is it exactly? Who put it there? Is there any danger of it ever falling down? Those are all good questions, but mostly we talk about the upcoming solar eclipse and how otherwise boring the sun is. We also solve a listener problem concerning how to confront a boyfriend who chews with their mouth open.COME SEE US LIVE! We're coming to Edinburgh (Sept 13, 2017) and London (Sept 15 and 16, 2017). Get tickets at tcgte.com/tour.
14/08/171h 5m

Condiments

We all love food, but what about all that stuff we put on our food that isn't quite food, but makes the food we love even better? Yes, that's right, clearly we're talking about condiments. What are condiments? Which condiments are the best, and which are the pits? We'll answer all those questions and more, and learn a lot about the Spanish American War on this week's episode. COME SEE US LIVE! We're coming to Edinburgh (Sept 13, 2017) and London (Sept 15 and 16, 2017). Get tickets at tcgte.com/tour.
07/08/171h 7m

Road Trips

This week we’re talking all about the road! More specifically, taking trips on it. What makes a trip a road trip as opposed to just a regular trip? Is it okay to pee in a bottle instead of pulling over? Those and other classy questions are answered. Tim also tells a very long story about scones and then doesn’t even say if the scones were good or not.
30/07/171h 6m

Christopher Nolan

This week we talk about our good friend Chris Nolan and the movies he's made, in a rare insider's look at Hollywood (Tinseltown). Also, Tom discusses a very serious problem he's been dealing with.
24/07/171h 7m

How To Disappear

Interested in leaving your old life behind for a life on the run, like friends of the show D.B. Cooper and Whitey Bulger? We'll tell you how. But first we'll need to talk a bit about lil' stinkers.
16/07/171h 5m

Teen Fads 2017

Wanna learn about today's hottest new teen fads? Great news! Two men in their mid-30s are here to explain everything you need to know about fidget spinners, slime and dabbing. We also solve problems from someone who hates dining with his in-laws and a vegetarian who gets mocked at work. This episode is sponsored by Squarespace. Get 10% off your first purchase by going to squarespace.com and using offer code GUIDE.
10/07/171h 6m

iPhone 10th Anniversary

The iPhone came out 10 years ago, and boy oh boy, what a long strange trip it's been. This week we discuss the origins of the iPhone, our memories of its announcement and the way it changed the world around us. We also talk about Harrison Ford a lot.
03/07/171h 3m

Ron Howard

This week we’re talking about the name on everyone’s lips in Tinseltown: Little Ronnie Howard. He’s not Opie anymore, he’s a big time Hollywood director that is taking over one of the new Star Track movies.
25/06/171h 4m

Gardening

This week we're talking plants, and not the kind that the government puts in place to keep an eye on you. We also solve a problem from an accidental dog caregiver who doesn't like the attention his dog gets.
18/06/171h 10m

Airports

Tim has returned from a trip to Europe, and boy does he want to talk about the airports he flew into and out of. But first we discuss bringing suits to dry cleaners and try to make sense of the novelty t-shirts of the 1990s.
12/06/171h 3m

Personal Hygiene

Toothbrushing, showering, deodorant, when will it end? This week we're talking about the stuff you have to do to participate in polite society, namely cleaning yourself, you animal. Also, Tim complains about tourists.
04/06/171h 3m

Wonder Woman

This week we're talking about Wonder Woman, the star of the brand new movie called "Wonder Woman." Tom explains the origins of the character and Tim asks a bunch of dumb questions. But first, they talk about Broadway musicals and useless robots.
28/05/171h 2m

Fake Meat

In the interest of equal time, this week we’re talking about fake meat. Not just your grandpa’s veggie patties either. To hell with your grandpa’s veggie burgers actually. We’re talking veggie burgers that bleed baby! And meat that you can grow in a lab, or print out of a printer. It’s all kinda gross and weird, but so is regular meat so it’s all the same to us.
22/05/171h 4m

Meat

Listen to two beefy dudes chew the fat about meat. From Tim's tales of his time working at a butcher shop to Tom's list of the best meats, we cover it all. Also, we discuss the convoluted plot of an exciting new video game.
14/05/171h 3m

Laundry

This week Tom discusses the problems he’s having with his home life and Tim talks about his desire to sleep outside.Also we talk about laundromats, having your underwears stolen, Iron Butterfly, dryer fires, dry cleaning, bleach, new Febreeze scents, Tim goes through a list of how often you should launder things, and long distance phone calls.
07/05/171h 1m

Toilets

LET'S TALK TOILETS! This week Tom is very excited to talk about toilets for some reason, and Tim graciously lets him do so, for a very long time. We also discuss a highfalutin who refuses to serve regular coffee.
01/05/171h 2m

Board Games

Board games, sometimes known as “bored games” are games you play when you are bored. But what qualifies as a board game? Are cards a board game? What are the best board games? All of these questions and more are answered this week.
24/04/171h 4m

Tesla

This week we're talking about Elon Musk's electric car company Tesla, which we think is really great despite the fact that neither of us can afford to buy one. We also solve a problem from a twin who is looking to get up to some tricks.
17/04/171h 6m

Fast Casual Dining

This week we talk about Elon Musk sending two knuckleheads to the moon before getting to the heart of the matter: the difference between quick serve restaurants, fast casual dining, and fine dining. Along the way we learn about the fancy places Tom has eaten dinner and Tim slanders the entire city of Boston.
10/04/171h 1m

Riverdale

This week we're talking about the teen TV show sensation, Riverdale. It's a show about cool teens based on a comic about lame teens, and resident Archie expert Tim explains everything about it to Tom (with minor spoilers). We also talk about stealing McGriddles from McDonald's, which nobody should ever do.
02/04/171h 4m

Yet Another Tim and Tom Solve Your Problems

This week we decide to give back. That’s right, it’s yet another episode where all we do is solve your dang problems. We solve problems relating but not limited to: parents who don’t want you to bring your laptop on the plane even though you want to bring your laptop on the plane, naming children and polishing your resume. Also this week Tim talks about navigating supermarkets in a post-iPhone world.
27/03/171h 2m

Scams with Dan Deacon (LIVE)

We did a live episode in Austin, Texas during SXSW with our good friend Dan Deacon! It was ostensibly about "scams" but things went off the rails and got weird very quickly. Among other things, we talk about gross shenanigans at work, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and we solve a couple problems from a very nice, patient man. This episode is sponsored by Squarespace. Start your free trial today at squarespace.com and enter offer code GUIDE to get 10% off your first purchase.
20/03/171h 19m

Logan / Wolverine

This week we’re talking about a man so famous they made an entire movie about him. The movie and man in question? Logan, aka Wolverine. Also this week we talk butts on Instagram, MGM Studios, American Gladiators, children meeting Darth Vader, Tom’s replies to emails, and Rosario Dawson. This week's episode is sponsored by ZipRecruiter. Post jobs for free at ZipRecruiter.com/FIRST. This episode is sponsored by Blue Apron. Get your first three meals free, with free shipping, by going to blueapron.com/guide.
12/03/171h 3m

Hats

Hats. We all wear 'em but what do we REALLY know about them? This week we're talkin' all things hats, including unveiling our official, scientific list of Top Ten Hats.
06/03/171h 6m

Exoplanets

This week we're talking all about the latest discovery from NASA and it ain't that girls go to Jupiter to get more stupider. It's that there's a bunch of planets nearby that we totally didn't even notice until just now. Are they habitable? How long will it take to get to them? All of these questions and more are answered in the vaguest terms possible. Also Tom shaves his head by accident and we solve a listener problem concerning not having enough work to do at work. We're coming to SXSW in Austin, Texas on March 11! Tickets are on sale now at tcgte.com/tour
27/02/171h 1m

Presidents

This week, because it's Presidents' Day, we're talking about American presidents. There's no way this could go off the rails, right? Also, we talk about Popeye, Billy Joel and Voltron, as one would expect when discussing American history.
20/02/171h 4m

Looney Tunes

Looney Tunes! Merry Melodies! They're two different things! That's just one of the many thing you'll learn in this episode. Granted, we don't discuss what the differences are but it's been a long week, what do you want from us? Also we solve a listener problem from a bartender concerning their fellow bartender's terrible fake New England accent. If that's not enough, we also announce that we're coming to SXSW in Austin, Texas on March 11! Tickets are on sale now at tcgte.com/tour
13/02/171h 5m

Snapchat

Want to know more about the hottest app all the kids are using? You've come to the right place! Listen to two men in their 30s try to explain Snapchat. Also: Tom has a soup-related announcement, we have questions about McDonaldland and we solve a problem from a listener who had her package stolen from a post office.
06/02/171h 14m

Soup

The episode that everyone has been asking for: Soup. Nature's wettest food. Is it really just food mixed with water, or something more? You'll find out all about that and MORE in this week's episode.
30/01/171h 4m

The Circus

This week we talk about the most important thing in the news right now: the end of the Ringling Bros and Barnum & Bailey Circus. But that's not all: we talk about clowns, we talk about elephants, we talk about trapeze artists, we talk about lion tamers... we cover it all! Also, Tom shares some info he learned about the Super Mario Bros movie and as always, the conversation turns to Tom Hanks.
23/01/171h 7m

Food Network

This week we're talking about everyone's favorite TV channel to put on when they can't find anything to watch that isn't HGTV, that's right the Food Network. Tim tries to understand what the plot of Cooks vs. Cons is while Tom tries to wrap his head around how big the supermarket in Supermarket Sweep is.
16/01/171h 1m

Becoming A Vegetarian

In this episode, Tim talks about his recent decision to stop eating meat and Tom talks about how much he hates animals. We go through the top 10 reasons to become a vegetarian and have a frank discussion about the rocker Tommy Lee. Also, Tom has a bizarre experience at a screening of a Star Wars movie. This episode is sponsored by Squarespace. Start your free trial today at squarespace.com and enter offer code GUIDE to get 10% off your first purchase.
08/01/171h 7m

Winter

Winter is coming! Ha ha, just like that famous book and television show. Just kidding though, because winter is already here! This week we're talking about the coldest of the seasons for all the wrong reasons; that's right, winter.
02/01/171h 7m

Being An Adult (LIVE!)

Earlier this year we went to London, England and recorded a live show called "Being An Adult" and as a special holiday treat we're releasing it to you, a person who probably wasn't in London that night. Special thanks to the wonderful folks at Kings Place (especially Zoe!) who let us be a part of the 2016 London Podcast Festival.
26/12/161h 27m

Toys

It's the holiday season, and you know what that means... TOYS! Toys for everyone! This week we discuss all the toys that are worth spending all your free time playing with. Also, Tom has a terrifying series of nightmares and we rave about garbage chutes.
18/12/161h 6m

Going on Tour with Jeff Rosenstock

This week we have special guest star Jeff Rosenstock in the studio to tell us all about his glamourous rock n' rock lifestyle. Also we solve a lighthearted problem concerning whether or not to marry someone.
12/12/161h 15m

Cowboys

What's the deal with cowboys? I mean, most of them appear to be full-grown men, not boys, and they certainly aren't cows. Come on, people! This week we talk about what cowboys actually do and how we'd fare out on the range. We also discuss the death of the creator of the Big Mac.
05/12/161h 2m

David Blaine

Magic, magic, magic! This week we’re talking about David Blaine, a real magician’s magician. Also one of the few magicians that Tim and Tom have waved at IN PERSON. Hear all about that as well as all of his amazing feats of endurance in this week’s episode. This episode is brought to you by MVMT Watches. Get 15% off today - WITH FREE SHIPPING and FREE RETURNS—by going to mvmtwatches.com/guide. Join the MVMT! If you haven’t heard of them before, Harry's was started by two best friends – Jeff and Andy – who were fed up with being overcharged for razors, so they started their own razor company to give people what they deserve: a great shave at a fair price. Free shipping ends on December 9th, so ACT NOW.  Go to Harrys.com right now to get a limited edition holiday shave set while supplies last, and don’t forget to enter code GUIDE at checkout for $5 off.
28/11/161h 12m

Nintendo Entertainment System

Just in time for the release of the new NES Classic Edition, we talk about the beloved NES game system. Which games were the best? Which games were just for the scummy kids? How the heck did the gun for Duck Hunt work? We show our age and cover it all this week. We also talk about people freaking out about Daylight Savings Time and solve a problem from a listener who doesn't want to commute with her annoying coworker.
20/11/161h 7m

Tom Hanks

Boy, what a week. That's why we've decided to try our best to keep our minds off it for at least an hour and talk about the one thing everyone in this world can agree on: Tom Hanks. Starting with movies that aren't even made yet and going all the way back to the beginning, we talk about literally every movie Tom Hanks has ever been in.
14/11/161h 15m

Clowns

This week we do some clowning around, and discuss a topic thats sometimes funny but usually scary: clowns. We also talk about our potential new hotel business and solve a problem from a listener who works at a toy store!
07/11/161h 7m

Poltergeists

This week we're talking all about things that go bump in the night. Well, not all things. We're mostly just talking about poltergeists, which Tim wants to make very clear that he is not afraid of.
31/10/161h 4m

Myths and Legends - Werewolves

It's a spooktacular Halloween-ish episode, we discuss werewolves, the hairiest of all the mythical monsters. How do you avoid becoming a werewolf? How do you kill a loved one if they become a werewolf? We'll answer those questions and more! Also, we solve a couple problems.
24/10/161h 1m

Yosemite

This week Tim and Tom go hiking in the nation's largest national park: Yosemite. Learn all about hiking, nature and almost dying alone in the woods!
17/10/161h 11m

Left Handedness

This week we discuss the sinister implications of using the devil's dominant hand: the left hand. A lot of solid scientific research went into determining the evils of left handedness, and we'll use all of it. All of it.
10/10/161h 1m

Appetizers

This week we're talking apps and NOT the kind you might find on a modern smartphone! No, we're talking about the original apps: appetizers. The things you eat to appetize before a big meal. You know, like chicken fingers and stuff. This episode is brought to you by MVMT Watches.
03/10/161h 3m

Fall TV Preview 2016 - Part 2

This week brings the thrilling conclusion to Tim and Tom's discussion of the new fall TV schedule. We talk Empire, South Park, Lethal Weapon and some other stuff. Also, we solve a problem from a blacksmith (really).
25/09/161h 5m

Fall TV Preview 2016

This week, Tim and Tom scheme to become hulking muscle men. They also discuss some of the new and returning TV shows coming this fall. What shows? Well, shows like Supernatural, Westworld, Jane The Virgin, Kevin Can Wait, Big Bang Theory, Who’s The Boss, Dancing with the Stars, Ladder Matches, Supergirl, Night Court rumors, Dr. Phil, Designated Survivor. There’s also a little Edward Snowden talk.
18/09/161h 8m

iPhone 7

Apple announced the iPhone 7 this week (and some other stuff) and we talk about it as we are wont to do. We also discuss the latest Taylor Swift news and solve a problem from a listener who can't get her partner to listen to the same music as her.
11/09/161h 13m

MTV VMA 2016

Welcome to this week's episode of Teen Talk, the only show where two men in their mid-thirties talk about all the cool stuff teens are into. This week Tom watched the MTV Video Music Awards and wasn't nearly as confused as he thought he'd be.
04/09/161h 5m

Burger King

This week we talk about Burger King, an episode we were shocked we haven't done before. Obviously there's a lot of Whopper talk, but we also discuss some lesser-known menu items for all you fast food hipsters. Also, Tim wants to spy on a contractor and we solve a problem from someone who wants some driving tips. Blue Apron knows that when you cook with incredible ingredients, you make incredible meals, so they set the highest quality standards for their community of artisanal suppliers, family-run farms, fisheries and ranchers. Whether it’s Japanese ramen noodles, wild-caught Alaskan salmon or heirloom tomatoes, Blue Apron is bringing you the best. Check out this week’s menu and get your first THREE meals FREE—WITH FREE SHIPPING—by going to blueapron.com/GUIDE
26/08/161h 12m

Alien Superstructure

Have we possibly found an alien civilization almost 1,500 light years away? That’s what some scientists are saying, and if you can’t trust scientists who can you trust? This week we’re talking about the famous vacuum cleaner man Dyson and his sphere, which collects energy for a star. We also hear from a woman named Becky who asks for advice about how to get people to stop calling her Becky.
21/08/161h 6m

Buffalo Wings

Hoo boy, this is a hot one! This week we talk about everybody's favorite spicy treat that covers your face with sauce and makes you work for every last bit of meat on the bone: Buffalo Wings. Also, Tim is bummed out and Tom can't get enough of The Matrix. And in a new installment of Tim & Tom Solve Your Problems, we advise a gentleman who has a co-worker who won't leave him alone.
13/08/161h 14m

Jared Leto

From My So-Called Life to Suicide Squad we’ve watch Jared Leto grow from a handsome boy to a handsome man who still looks like a boy. Whether he’s gaining a lot of weight or losing a lot of weight he sure can act. This week we’re talking all about him and his method acting and his band that all the kids seem to love, 30 Seconds to Mars. Blue Apron knows that when you cook with incredible ingredients, you make incredible meals, so they set the highest quality standards for their community of artisanal suppliers, family-run farms, fisheries and ranchers.  Whether it’s Japanese ramen noodles, wild-caught Alaskan salmon or heirloom tomatoes, Blue Apron is bringing you the best.  Check out this week’s menu and get your first THREE meals FREE—WITH FREE SHIPPING—by going to blueapron.com/GUIDE
05/08/161h 8m

Shoes

Shoes. Everybody wears 'em, but what do we really know about them? This week, we discuss all different kinds of shoes and share some very important opinions about that famous footwear everybody's talking about: shoes! Also, Tom has some words for people who don't check their email, and we solve a problem from a lady who can't convince her boyfriend to get the kind of dog she wants. This episode is brought to you by Loot Crate. Loot Crate is a monthly subscription box service for epic geek and gamer items and pop culture gear. For less than $20 a month you get 4-8 items that include licensed gear, apparel, collectibles, unique one of a kind items and more! Make sure to head to lootcrate.com/everything and enter code EVERYTHING to save $3 on any new subscription!
31/07/161h 8m

Lucid Dreaming

This week we're talking all about lucid dreaming. What's lucid dreaming? It's when you know you're in a dream! You'll be thinking, "Am I HAVING a dream? If so, I never want to wake up!" when you listen to this amazing episode! Also we solve a listener problem about Jeopardy! that makes Tim jealous.
24/07/161h 9m

Pokémon Go

This week two men in their 30s will infuriate a bunch of you by trying to make sense of the Pokémon Go phenomenon. We also solve a problem from a listener who can't get rid of an annoying friend. This episode is brought to you by Loot Crate. Loot Crate is a monthly subscription box service for epic geek and gamer items and pop culture gear. For less than $20 a month you get 4-8 items that include licensed gear, apparel, collectibles, unique one of a kind items and more! Make sure to head to lootcrate.com/everything and enter code EVERYTHING to save $3 on any new subscription!
16/07/161h 19m

Waterparks

Waterparks! Slides, tubes, pools, waterparks have them all. This week Tim and Tom went to a waterpark for the first time in probably at least a decade and returned to tell the tale. They discuss the different kinds of amusements one would find at a waterpark as well as what’s worth your time (lazy rivers) and what might not be (wave pools). If you’re looking for thrills AND spills then this episode is right up your alley. Blue Apron knows that when you cook with incredible ingredients, you make incredible meals, so they set the highest quality standards for their community of artisanal suppliers, family-run farms, fisheries and ranchers.  Whether it’s Japanese ramen noodles, wild-caught Alaskan salmon or heirloom tomatoes, Blue Apron is bringing you the best. Check out this week’s menu and get your first THREE meals FREE—WITH FREE SHIPPING—by going to blueapron.com/GUIDE
09/07/161h 7m

Fourth Of July

On this episode, we celebrate our country's independence from that lousy king and talk about hot dogs and fireworks and all that stuff. Also, Tom has an idea for a new kind of credit card scam. This week's episode is sponsored by Blue Apron. To get your first three meals free (with free shipping), head to blueapron.com/guide.
02/07/161h 13m

Golf

This week we talk about the sport that all the gentleman go wild for: golf. From putting to sand traps, we cover it all. Plus, Tom sees some ridiculous fashion choices on a train and Tim shares a horrible story involving a horse. This week's episode is sponsored by Blue Apron. To get your first three meals free (with free shipping), head to blueapron.com/everything.
25/06/161h 8m

Sandwiches

This week we’re talking turkey, turkey SANDWICHES that is. One of our favorite topics, but one that has never been explored at length, until now. We aren’t afraid to tackle the big issues either. Mustard or mayonnaise? Whole wheat or white bread? How tall of a sandwich is too tall? We also find surprising common ground as well as a whole lot of conflict.
19/06/161h 4m

Simulation Hypothesis

This week we learn that the world around us might not be what it seems, as Tom explains to Tim what the Simulation Hypothesis is all about. Is life as we know it a computer simulation? It's possible. Does Tim have issues with low blood sugar? It would explain all the giggling in this episode. We also solve a problem from a listener who has an awkward situation at work with her boyfriend.
12/06/161h 10m

Summer Vacation

School’s. Out. For. Summer. That’s right kids, this week we’re talking about what you’ve been waiting for all school year: summer vacation! We discuss the various exciting and not-so-exciting off-year summer vacation destinations we both went to as kids and a shocking revelation is made about Tim’s diving expertise (or lack thereof?). Also this week we solve a listener problem about an inherited cat that’s been bringing around a bad crowd. This episode is brought to you by Loot Crate. Loot Crate is a monthly subscription box service for epic geek and gamer items and pop culture gear. For less than $20 a month you get 4-8 items that include licensed gear, apparel, collectibles, unique one of a kind items and more! Make sure to head to lootcrate.com/everything and enter code EVERYTHING to save $3 on any new subscription! Just for ourlisteners, Audible.com is offering a free 30 day trial membership! Go to audiblepodcast.com/everything today to start your free trial today! Again, show your support for The Complete Guide To Everything and get a free 30 day trial at audiblepodcast.com/everything
05/06/161h 6m

Sweden

This week, a jet lagged Tim talks about what he learned on his fact-finding trip to Stockholm while an allergy-ridden Tom struggles to understand Swedish culture. We also solve a problem from a listener who has a problem with some cat bullies.
29/05/161h 2m

Reboots

This week we drink whiskey and discuss Hollywood's obsession with reboots, but we wind up just arguing about the new Ghostbusters movie for a while. We also solve a problem from a woman who loves her job despite the fact she doesn't know how to actually do her job. And also, we're going to be a part of the London Podcast Festival at Kings Place. The festival is September 23-25 (we have shows on the 23rd and 24th) and tickets go on sale May 31 at noon. You should really go to it.
21/05/161h 12m

Acupuncture

This week Tim and Tom are talking about acupuncture. Does it really help or is it really just sticking a bunch of pins in yourself and hoping for the best? Also, a frank discussion about moisturizing habits.
14/05/161h 6m

2016 Summer Movies Part 2

This week Tom's back from Ireland and ready to talk about even more summer movies!
07/05/161h 9m

Tim And Tom Solve Even More of Your Problems Again

Experienced problem solvers Tim and Tom are at it again this week, guiding you through your most serious quandaries. We help people with their problems relating to the Property Brothers, tattoos and rude people in new towns. To be honest, it just feels so good to give back. Also, Tom talks about his brother's wedding and Tim explains what your favorite teen star from the 90s is up to.
29/04/161h 5m

Prince

We heard the news that Prince passed away shortly before we recorded this week's episode, so this week we talked about Prince and how cool he was. Also, in a followup to last week's Oculus Rift episode, Tom explains how he is transitioning to living in cyberspace full-time.
24/04/161h 10m

Oculus Rift

This week, Tom explains everything about the Oculus Rift, the newly-released virtual reality headset that he recently purchased, in what will likely be his last episode ever before going to live full time in cyberspace. Also, Tim has a series of misadventures at a rock concert and we talk a little more about last week's topic of Tiny Houses.
16/04/161h 5m

Tiny Houses

Spread the word: tiny houses aren’t just for people who can’t afford big houses anymore! This week we’re talking about the minimalist movement sweeping the nation. Want to build your own tiny house and then go live in the woods all alone? Then you’ve come to the right place. Also, we solve a listener problem concerning a yawning co-worker/roommate. Today’s sponsor is Casper Mattresses - obsessively engineered American-made mattresses at a shockingly fair price. And now, you can get $50 toward any mattress purchase by going to casper.com/guide and using code GUIDE. This episode is brought to you by Loot Crate. Loot Crate is a monthly subscription box service for epic geek and gamer items and pop culture gear. For less than $20 a month you get 4-8 items that include licensed gear, apparel, collectibles, unique one of a kind items and more! Make sure to head to lootcrate.com/everything and enter code EVERYTHING to save $3 on any new subscription!
09/04/161h 13m

The Internet Of Things

Pretty soon every item in your home will be connected to the internet and everything you need will happen automatically. At least, that's what all the nerds who are buying internet-connected refrigerators are saying. Anyway, this week we talk about the Internet of Things, Tom's obsession with having a "connected home" and we speak with a very special robot guest. Also, Tim's cab driver has a run-in with the police and we try to order cashews just by talking into thin air. Loot Crate is a monthly subscription box service for epic geek and gamer items and pop culture gear. For less than $20 a month you get 4-8 items that include licensed gear, apparel, collectibles, unique one of a kind items and more! Make sure to head to lootcrate.com/everything and enter code EVERYTHING to save $3 on any new subscription!
03/04/161h 5m

2016 Summer Movies Part 1

Movies Movies Movies! Like we always say: hooray for Hollywood! This week, Tim and Tom take Tinseltown as we preview this summer's hottest blockbusters. (Actually, in this episode we mostly talk about movies coming out in April and May.) But the main event is Tom's complex reaction to the new Batman v Superman movie, which was not very good. We also solve a problem from a listener who needs to travel across the country with a couple of cats.
26/03/161h 10m

Spring Break

This week we're taking a break... a SPRING BREAK that is! We're talking about all the hot spot destinations for spring break like Florida! Also this week we solve a lister problem concerning a mouse but not from a mouse. Today’s sponsor is Casper Mattresses - obsessively engineered American-made mattresses at a shockingly fair price. And now, you can get $50 toward any mattress purchase by going to casper.com//guide and using code GUIDE
19/03/161h 14m

Civilian Space Travel

Blast off with your best buds Tim and Tom as we talk about civilian space travel. That's right, some billionaires are trying to make it possible for schlubs like us to go to space, which seems like a really bad idea. We also talk about public drinking laws in New York City, going to the movies with teenagers and we solve a problem from a guy whose roommate hasn't showered in weeks. Audible.com is offering a free 30 day trial membership! Go to audiblepodcast.com/everything today to start your free trial today! Again, show your support for The Complete Guide To Everything and get a free 30 day trial at audiblepodcast.com/everything Loot Crate is a monthly subscription box service for epic geek and gamer items and pop culture gear. For less than $20 a month you get 4-8 items that include licensed gear, apparel, collectibles, unique one of a kind items and more! Make sure to head to lootcrate.com/everything and enter code EVERYTHING to save $3 on any new subscription!
12/03/161h 12m

Popcorn

Popcorn, get your fresh popcorn! This week we're talking all about the treat that's a treat to eat: popcorn. How does corn turn into popcorn? What are the different ways to make popcorn? Why doesn't Tim like popcorn? All of these questions and more are answered on this week's episode. Audible.com is offering a free 30 day trial membership! Go to audiblepodcast.com/everything today to start your free trial today! Again, show your support for The Complete Guide To Everything and get a free 30 day trial at audiblepodcast.com/everything Loot Crate is a monthly subscription box service for epic geek and gamer items and pop culture gear. For less than $20 a month you get 4-8 items that include licensed gear, apparel, collectibles, unique one of a kind items and more! Make sure to head to lootcrate.com/everything and enter code EVERYTHING to save $3 on any new subscription!
07/03/161h 13m

The Chupacabra

This week, we have a brand new installment in our TCGTE Myths and Legends series. We talk about the infamous goat sucker, the chupacabra and uncover some truly alarming facts. Also, Tim has some stories about riding the bus and we solve problems from a lady looking for love and a child politician.
27/02/161h 8m

Bagels

Bagels, bagels, bagels. This week we’re talking about the ol’ bready treat known as bagels. Toasted, untested, cream cheese, butter, New York-style, Montreal-style, we don’t shy away from any bagel-related topic. Also this week Tim discusses his trip to the magical Build Your Own Burger McDonalds that Tom visited a few weeks ago as well as his Valentine’s Day run-in with Rainbow Bagels. Also this week we celebrate the return of the Mundane Bucket List and we solve a listener problem involving a couple’s escalating prank war.
21/02/161h 5m

Childhood Ambitions

Ever wonder what the tiny, child-versions of Tim & Tom wanted to be when they grew up? What were our hopes and our dreams? The answers may shock you. Also, Burger King announces it'll serve hot dogs, Tom has a question about the Super Bowl and we solve a problem about old love letters.
14/02/161h 12m

Groceries

This week Tim and Tom are talking Groceries, something that neither of them thought to shop for until very recently. We're talking fruits, we're talking vegetables, are we talking meats? You're damn right we're talking meats. No stone is left unturned. Also this week we solve a listener's problem concerning how to make an acquaintance into a friend without being a real weirdo about it.
07/02/161h 6m

Rebranding

Questions about branding? You've come to the right place. This week we're talking about rebranding efforts: Radio Shack, Pizza Hut, Dr. Pepper and a bunch of other brands have switched things up in a misguided attempt to appeal to young folks, and all of them paid a terrible price for doing so. Can we rebrand The Complete Guide to Everything to appeal to a new, hip audience? But first, Tom takes a magical trip to a new McDonalds with a magical touch screen. Also, we solve a problem from a listener with a co-worker who is a boring drunk.
30/01/161h 8m

Snow

There's a blizzard a-comin'! As we prepare for the biggest snow storm to hit NYC in decades, we're talking all things snow: childhood memories, panicked rushes on the supermarkets for bread and milk, and building disappointing snowmen. We also come up with a foolproof plan to avoid snowstorms altogether in the future. And in a new installment of Tim and Tom Solve Your Problems, we help out a chef who can't seem to keep her subordinates out of jail.
23/01/161h 14m

Glasses

This week we’re talkin’ glasses. It turns out they’re not just for nerds anymore because now Tom needs them too. Mostly this is just an episode where Tom complains, first about the Post Office, then about the process of getting an eye exam and buying glasses. Also, Tim answers a lot of Tom’s burning questions about the ins and outs of glasses ownership. Then at the very end we talk about how everyone admirable has been dying lately and it’s really sad. This episode is brought to you by Loot Crate. Would you classify yourself as a geek, gamer or popculture nerd? Then this is the subscription box for you. Make sure to head to lootcrate.com/GUIDE and enter code GUIDE to save $3 on any new subscription! Audible.com is offering our listeners a free 30 day trial membership! Go to audiblepodcast.com/everything today to start your free trial today! Show your support for The Complete Guide To Everything and get a free 30 day trial at audiblepodcast.com/everything
17/01/161h 21m

Sensory Deprivation

This week we're hittin' the tanks! We took a field trip to a new age-y place to get into sensory deprivation tanks. Was it fun? Did Tim lose his mind forever? Did Tom travel through the cosmos and discover the meaning of life? Listen and find out what we learned by lying down naked in some salt water in the dark for an hour.
09/01/161h 5m

Ska With Dan Deacon

Our old buddy and acclaimed music guy Dan Deacon stops by to ring in 2016 and talk about ska music, Santa Claus and a bunch of weird stuff with us. We also solve a couple listener problems in a special edition of Tim & Tom & Dan Solve Your Problems.
02/01/161h 20m

Chocolate

For the last episode of 2015, we talk about chocolate, the only food that Tom eats without complaining. We discuss the Mast Brothers controversy in detail and consistently mispronounce the word cacao. Also, Tim has a heartwarming holiday encounter in a pizza place.
26/12/151h 11m

T&TSYP

We've had to skip solving problems for the past few weeks so this week we're doing nothing but (solving problems that is.)
19/12/151h 8m

US Mail

The Mail's here! Ha ha, just kidding, but we are talking about it this week. Soon you'll be able to look at pictures of your mail before you get it and maybe even do your banking at the post office. Plus Tim has some ideas about how the mail can be improved.
12/12/151h 10m

Stand - Up Comedy

This week we talk about that thing people in suits do with a microphone in front of a brick wall: stand-up comedy. Things get a little heated when we go through a strange list of best-ever comedians from 2005. Also, Tom tries to start a feud with an actor that nobody has ever heard of.
05/12/151h 13m

RPGs

Another thrilling installment of Tom Explaining Something Nerdy to Tim! This week we’re talking about Role Playing Games, or RPGs, something Tom barely understands himself. We’re talking all about everything from Dungeons and Dragons to Fallout 4. We also solve a problem with how to deal with an acquaintance who is also a jerk. A jerkquaintance, if you will. Socks and underwear use to be a boring stocking stuffer, but Mack Weldon has changed it into a top- of-the-line gift. The Mack Weldon holiday packs are not just a gift that every man needs, it's the gift that every man is excited to get. Go to mackweldon.com and get 20% off using the promo code: EVERYTHING
28/11/151h 10m

Public Relations

Public Relations is a hard job. This week we talk about the PR efforts behind a new TV show (Tom was invited to a fancy premiere party), Adele’s new album and Justin Beaver: The Dancing Boy. We also solve a problem that is super ridiculous. HEY NEW YORK! Come to our live Holiday Spectacular at Union Hall in Brooklyn on December 4th. Get tickets at tcgte.com/live.
22/11/151h 11m

Pizza

Can you believe we've never done an episode about Pizza? I mean, we probably have, but we couldn't find it listed anywhere so here it is. You'll find out our favorite toppings, least favorite toppings, and opinions about non-New York pizza which may surprise you! Also we solve a problem relating to where to find a quiet place to propose in NYC. This week's episode is sponsored by TransferWise. TransferWise is the smart way to send money abroad. Head to transferwise.com/completeguide and your first transfer up to $500 will be free!
15/11/151h 6m

The Moon

This week we talk about the moon and whether or not it is actually made of cheese. Also, Tom gets a flu shot, Tim becomes a skeptic and we solve a problem from a listener who isn't sure whether or not to move in with his grandmother. This week's episode is sponsored by Prudential. Visit bringyourchallenges.com for more information. We're also brought to you by Audible. Get a free audiobook of your choice and a free 30 day membership at audiblepodcast.com/everything.
07/11/151h 8m

Hoverboards

The future is here, but not the future we were promised. This week we're talking about hoverboards, from Back to the Future 2, to real experimental hoverboards, to these weird self-balancing scooters that people are calling hoverboards. Also this week we solve a listener problem involving unwanted street violence.
01/11/151h 9m

Halloween Candy

This week two candy enthusiasts talk about candy for a while. We also discuss the spookiest Halloween songs, Tom considers what his life would be like as a drug addict and we solve a problem from a reasonable young woman whose friend is being a big jerk. This week's episode is sponsored by TransferWise, the smart way to send money abroad. Head to transferwise.com/completeguide and your first transfer up to $500 will be free!
24/10/151h 14m

Back to the Future

This week Tim gets scared by a scarecrow and we're talking about Tom's favorite movies of all time: the Back to the Future trilogy. Also, we solve a problem concerning an elementary school teacher who has to tutor her boyfriend.
17/10/151h 13m

NYC Comic Con 2015

Well, the comic book convention rolled into town, so we put on our journalist hats and hit the floor of NYC Comic Con 2015. In this episode we talk about our experience amongst the crowds, Tom eats a Halloween-themed Whopper and we feature another installment of the occasional series "Tim's Tales of Cowardice." Also, Tom talks about Batman a lot, probably.
10/10/151h 12m

Pretty Woman

Look, sometimes in the podcast game you pick the topics and sometimes they pick you. And then sometimes you pick the topic but instead wind up talking about Pretty Woman for an hour instead. This week is one of those times. Also Tom lends his wisdom and experience as a former RA to solve a problem facing a new RA.
04/10/151h 9m

Podcasts

This week we talk about podcasts, a topic that we theoretically know a lot about. We also talk about the Pope's visit to New York (will a certain special guest drop by the TCGTE studio??) and we solve a problem from a barber who places lots of bets. Honestly, things kind of go off the rails in this episode.
26/09/151h 8m

Burning Man

Burning Man. Is it a free-wheeling, anything goes festival where people go to find themselves through art and expression, or is it just baloney. The Complete Guide to Everything investigates (by reading things on the internet and making wild assumptions). Also Tim talks about his Bing gambling problem and we solve a problem involving us of all people.
20/09/151h 11m

Apple TV

This week we talk about the new Apple products, as we do at least twice a year. Will Tim wake up at 3 a.m. to buy the new iPhone? Will Tom buy a new Apple TV despite already owning many devices that do the same thing? Tune in for the answers to these questions and much more! Also, we discuss self-help books, big bags of M&Ms and the logistics of air traffic control.
12/09/151h 7m

TV Show Tapings

This week Tim and Tom went to a test show of the new Late Show with Stephen Colbert but they're not really allowed to talk about it. So instead they talk about all the other weird TV show tapings they've been to, as well as their differing opinions of Miley Cyrus and Sesame Place. Also a listener question involving breaking and entering by a neighbor is solved.
06/09/151h 11m

McWhopper

This is it. The episode topic this show was made for. This week we discuss Burger King's proposal to team up with McDonald's in the name of world peace (or something) and create a hybrid Big Mac and Whopper. We talk about the wide-ranging effects of this newsworthy event, create our own fast food hybrids and debate the ethics of getting a chicken addicted to cigarettes.
29/08/151h 5m

Bad Luck

This week we're talkin' 'bout the idea of bad luck. Specifically, how Tom managed to lock himself out of his home, break his computer, and more all in one week. We also talk about some other superstitions and solve a listener problem involving buying stolen property.
22/08/151h 5m

Berenstain Bears And The Mandela Effect

This week we talk about the internet's obsession with the spelling of the children's book series The Berenstain Bears and delve into the weird world of the Mandela Effect. It turns out, if you misremembered something, you might not be wrong; it's possible you are a traveler from a different parallel dimension. Seriously. Also, we talk hoverboards (as always), Tim has an important message about The Muppets and we solve a problem from a man who can't stop tilting his head in photographs. Brought to you by Sidekick by Hubspot. With Sidekick, you can have powerful contact insight right in your inbox. Seamlessly integrated email tools for Gmail, Apple Mail, and Outlook to receive live notifications when someone opens and clicks on your emails. Go to getsidekick.com/everything to get your first month of Sidekick for free.
14/08/151h 12m

City Etiquette

Tom pitches Tim a billion dollar bathroom business. We also discuss the many, many rules of etiquette in the big city, from subways to walkways. A problem involving lying about quitting a job just to go work right down the block is also solved. Brought to you by Sidekick by Hubspot. With Sidekick, you can have powerful contact insight right in your inbox. Seamlessly integrated email tools for Gmail, Apple Mail, and Outlook to receive live notifications when someone opens and clicks on your emails. Go to getsidekick.com/everything to get your first month of Sidekick for free.
09/08/151h 7m

Celebrity Encounters

This week we have stars in our eyes! We discuss the various celebs we've met throughout the years and the stupid things we've said to them. We also talk about a bunch of other random stuff because NYC is in the middle of a heat wave so brutal that we can't even think straight. Brought to you by Sidekick by Hubspot. With Sidekick, you can have powerful contact insight right in your inbox. Seamlessly integrated email tools for Gmail, Apple Mail, and Outlook to receive live notifications when someone opens and clicks on your emails. Go to getsidekick.com/everything to get your first month of Sidekick for free. We're also sponsored by Audible.com. Get a free audiobook of your choice and a free 30 day trial membership at audiblepodcast.com/everything.
01/08/151h 4m

Foo Fighters

It's Foo Fighters week on The Complete Guide to Everything. That's because Tim and Tom saw the Foo Fighters last week at Citi Field. This week we talk all about Foo Fighters, the basis for Tim and Tom's original friendship in the 1990's. We also go through each album, naming the best, worst and sleeper hits of each until we get to the albums where we don't recognize any songs any more. Brought to you by Sidekick by Hubspot. With Sidekick, you can have powerful contact insight right in your inbox. Seamlessly integrated email tools for Gmail, Apple Mail, and Outlook to receive live notifications when someone opens and clicks on your emails. Go to getsidekick.com/everything to get your first month of Sidekick for free.
25/07/151h 26m

Taco Bell

This week we're heading for the border and thinking outside the bun, cause we're talkin' Taco Bell. We go in-depth about the most bizarre of the major fast food chains and deconstruct their current and former menu items. Also, Tom has a lot of opinions about famous dogs and we stumble on a million dollar idea that would be an absolute game-changer at McDonald's.
16/07/151h 14m

Fallen Heroes

This week we’re talking about famous people everyone loves who turned out to be (alleged) monsters. Mostly we’re talking about Jared from Subway, Bill Cosby and Tom Selleck. We also talk about current hero and non-alleged monster Tyrese Gibson who has built a Starbucks in his backyard. T&TSYP this week tackles a listener problem concerning pissing off a friend’s chicken. This episode is brought to you by Amazon! July 15th is Prime Day with HUGE discounts. Be sure to visit tcgte.com/amazon to check them out and support the show.
11/07/151h 8m

Apple Music

This week we're talking about the hot new entrant into the streaming music game: scrappy young upstart Apple. We also discuss Donald Trump's PR strategy, Tom Hanks' recent career choices, cracking wise on a lifeboat and, as is required by law whenever talking about anything music industry-related, Taylor Swift. Additionally, we solve a problem from a listener who can't stop reading his emails in a goofy accent.
04/07/151h 14m

Mobile Games

This week we're talkin' mobile gaming and some Arkham Knight, even though it's not a mobile game whatsoever. We also solve a problem involving some complicated political issues relating to high school student government. This week's episode is brought to you by: Uncle John's Bathroom Reader - Go to bathroomreader.com/everything to download a free mini eBook. Loot Crate - go to lootcrate.com/everything and enter code "EVERYTHING" to save $3 on any new subscription! Advertiser Survey - Lastly we have a 5 minute survey you can take to help us fund the best advertises matched to you and enter a drawing to win a $100 Amazon gift card at podsurvey.com/guide
29/06/151h 13m

Fan Theories

This week, we talk about a thing that everyone on the internet is required to talk about at some point: fan theories. You know that movie or TV show you like? Well, you're never going to believe what's REALLY happening in it. It turns out half the characters are secretly dead and most of the scenes are fever dreams and coma fantasies. This week's episode is brought to you by: Uncle John's Bathroom Reader - Go to bathroomreader.com/everything to download a free mini eBook. "In Praise of American Educators" - Learn more at www.solution-tree.com/inpraise
21/06/151h 10m

Escaping From Prison

This week we’re talking all about the recent prison break in upstate New York which hopefully hasn’t come to a horribly tragic end by the time you listen to this. Also discussed: Tim’s depressing lunch at Quizno’s, the idea of toasted burritos, a puppet restaurant, lockdowns, Tim’s near run-in with the Hammerman, real life Harley Quinn, dirty prison underwear, the governor of New York being on the case, US Marshals. This week's episode is brought to you by:
Uncle John's Bathroom Reader - Go to bathroomreader.com/everything to download a free mini eBook. "In Praise of American Educators" - Learn more at www.solution-tree.com/inpraise
14/06/151h 8m

Tim And Tom Solve Your Problems Yet Again

You all have been sending us your problems and dang it, we always try our hardest to solve 'em. This week we devote the entire episode to helping out our listeners, save for some talk about Night Court and America's Funniest Home Videos. This week's episode is brought to you by: Uncle John's Bathroom Reader - Go to bathroomreader.com/everything to download a free mini eBook. "In Praise of American Educators" - Learn more at www.solution-tree.com/inpraise
07/06/151h 5m

Treating Yourself

This week Tom decides that he deserves a look into how the other half lives and treats himself to a luxuriously long massage. We also discuss friend of the show Ben Affleck’s problems with his wife and neighbors as well as annoying subway bongo players. Our live shows in London are coming up soon (JUNE 25, 26 & 27) so you should buy tickets right now at tcgte.com/live. Thursday night is 50 Shades of Tim and Friday night is Dating Part 5: Online Dating!
30/05/151h 10m

2015 Summer Movies

This week is our annual summer movie preview, recorded after several of the year's biggest blockbusters have been released and already forgotten. Since loud, dumb summer movies are basically created for people like Tom, we've created the Tom-Scale™ of movie ratings so you can keep track of which movies are worth your time. But first, we announce the extremely exciting and very sexy topic for our first show in London this year. By the way, the shows are coming up soon (JUNE 25, 26 & 27) so you should buy tickets right now at tcgte.com/live. Also, Tim tries to find a venue for his birthday party that isn't a bar, and we solve a problem from a listener about iced coffee.
22/05/151h 10m

Mattresses (Part One Of The Bed Series)

What conversation about mattresses would be complete if it didn’t start with 20 minutes of Tim complaining about Tom’s new Apple Watch and ignoring Tim’s text message? After that, we talk about the new mattress Tom bought from the internet, the time Tim got duped into paying an extra $200 for a mattress by a mattress salesman, mattress protectors and spilling wine/wetting the bed and a tease for future bed episodes. This week we also solve a problem from a listener who found a bunch of undeveloped film rolls in hiding place in the old shed of the new home he bought.
17/05/151h 9m

California

This week we kinda talk about the great state of California, a place where we have each been a couple times and have some vague opinions about. Also, Tim is sick, Tom gets a new water filter and we solve a problem from a listener who has a weird mental picture of the two of us.
08/05/151h 5m

HGTV

This week we're talking Home and Garden Television, or HGTV to the layperson. Flip or Flop, House Hunters, House Hunters International, Property Brothers, you name it. (Mostly just those though.)
02/05/151h 12m

Birthdays

It's Tom's birthday, so he gets to talk about whatever he wants this week. Oddly, he chooses to talk about the subject of birthdays. Also: Tom doesn't get his Apple Watch in time for his birthday, Tim has a bus adventure, we contemplate the future of Marvel movies and a fact about a talking horse creeps us both out. And in a new installment of Tim & Tom Solve Your Problems, we help a listener with his ringtone quandary. This week's episode is sponsored by Shari's Berries! Get freshly dipped strawberries starting at $19.99 by going to berries.com, clicking on the microphone and entering the code "Brooklyn."
25/04/151h 8m

Bruce Willis

It’s the return of Bruno. Not really, but we talk a lot about Bruce Willis, his musical alter-ego Bruno, and his sci-fi film career.
19/04/151h 7m

Area 51

Do you want to know more about aliens hidden at secret government facilities? Do you want to see Donald Trump kiss a bunch of people on television? Do commercials for toilet paper make you irrationally angry? If you answered yes to these questions, this is the podcast episode for you! This week's episode is brought to you by Loot Crate - go to lootcrate.com/everything and enter code "EVERYTHING" to save $3 on any new subscription!
12/04/151h 6m

Cars Of The Future!

This week we’re talking cars of the future, like Tesla, Google’s Self-Driving Car, Hyperloop, Apple’s Car and more. Also this week we hear about how Tom fell down in the street along with the riveting tale of how Timmy Baloneyskins became Timmy Meatballs. Hey New York City! We're doing a show in Brooklyn on 4/10 at Union Hall. We have to keep the topic secret because we're afraid to announce it publicly, but we promise it'll be worth your while. Get tickets at tcgte.com/live. This week’s episode is sponsored by Loot Crate. They’ll deliver you a monthly box with 6-8 cool items like vinyl figurines, comics, shirts, and more - and each month has a theme. Go tolootcrate.com/EVERYTHING and enter code EVERYTHING to save $3 on any new subscription!
04/04/151h 4m

Starbucks

This week's episode is about a chain of coffee shops that also sells easy listening music and always has a bathroom for you to use when you need one. Also this week: Tim has some ideas for spoons, we salute the hard work done by bookies everywhere, and we solve a problem from a listener about her dogs. Hey New York City! We're doing a show in Brooklyn on 4/10 at Union Hall. We have to keep the topic secret because we're afraid to announce it publicly, but we promise it'll be worth your while. Get tickets at tcgte.com/live.
28/03/151h 10m

Buying A Car

Tom’s had an interesting week in regards to popcorn and being a tough guy. Also, Tim and Tom argue about the logistics of stretch limo hot tub maintenance before getting to the topic at hand: buying a car. Neither is buying a car, but that doesn’t stop them from discussing it. Also, a problem is solved in relation to vacationing with a family friend in NYC. HEY NEW YORK! Come see us in Brooklyn on 4/10. Tickets at tcgte.com/live. HEY LONDON! Come see us in London on 6/25, 6/26 and 6/27. Tickets at tcgte.com/live.
21/03/151h 5m

Minecraft

This week we discuss Minecraft, the worldwide phenomenon that somehow Tim was completely unaware of. Luckily Tom is there to explain it all. Then we hatch schemes to live inside our Minecraft creations when the technology is finally available. We also talk about Bill Gates' magical video walls and what we would do with the giant letters from Yankee Stadium. This week's episode is brought to you by Loot Crate - go to lootcrate.com/everything and enter code "EVERYTHING" to save $3 on any new subscription! We're also sponsored by Audible. Get a free 30-day trial and audiobook of your choice at audiblepodcast.com/everything.
14/03/151h 6m

Harrison Ford

A heated debate concerning TGI Friday’s Endless Apps takes up about half of this episode, but we do eventually get to talking about Harrison Ford. Who is Harrison Ford you ask? Why, he was in Star Wars, Indiana Jones, Blade Runner, you name it and so do we, in this episode. Mostly we talk about him crashing a plane into a golf course though. We also solve a listener problem concerning moving out of the sticks to the big city. This week’s episode is sponsored by Loot Crate. They’ll deliver you a monthly box with 6-8 cool items like vinyl figurines, comics, shirts, and more - and each month has a theme. Go to lootcrate.com/EVERYTHING and enter code EVERYTHING to save $3 on any new subscription!
08/03/151h 4m

Sneakers

This week it's all about the shoes. Ya see, we're talking about sneakers, and we don't mean the 1992 film starring Robert Redford and Dan Aykroyd. We're talking about actual sneakers that you wear on your feet and Tom tells a story about designing his custom Nikes. We also talk about how the obnoxiousness of the Jersey Boys musical and solve a problem from a listener about an annoying co-worker. HEY NEW YORK! Come see us in Brooklyn on 4/10. Tickets at tcgte.com/live.
28/02/151h 5m

Toy Fair

This week Tim and Tom go to Toy Fair! But first, a frank discussion about how the subway tracks are cleaned, then it's on to Toy Fair! A place where they apparently don't give out free toys but will let you hurt yourself on a remote control skateboard if you ask them. We also try to solve a listener problem regarding an arranged marriage!
21/02/151h 13m

Kanye West

This week we talk about polarizing musician Kanye West because the world needs to hear more opinions about him. This episode contains the most passionate defense of Kanye from a guy who doesn't really care from him that you'll hear all week. Also Tim goes to a high class magic show and Tom tries to get him to explain all the tricks.
13/02/151h 8m

Vaccines

Hot topic alert! This week we’re talking about vaccines. Who’s getting them, who’s not getting them, you name it. Also we talk about the logistics of storing your own blood and making a new skeleton. Also we solve possibly the most embarrassing listener problem we’ve ever received.
07/02/151h 6m

Microsoft

This week's episode is about Microsoft, a company that makes software and computer stuff. We talk about the majesty that is Windows 95, as well as some of their newer hit products like the Zune. We also solve a problem from a listener about feeding vegans at his wedding. This week's episode is brought to you by Harrys.com, which sells shaving supplies. Save $15 and get a chrome engraved Winston set for just $25 by using the coupon code EVERYTHINGVALENTINE.
31/01/151h 10m

Basketball

Basketball. B-ball. Tim and Tom went to a Brooklyn Nets game this week and now they've both got a bad case of basketball fever. They also talk about how terrible both of them are at basketball and the various levels of humiliation it has caused them throughout their lives. Also, a problem involving being too young to buy fish at an aquarium is solved.
25/01/151h 5m

Joining A Gym

This week Tom joins a gym and has some very big plans for how the rest of his life will play out. Also, Tim is afraid of teens he sees on the bus. And in a new installment of Tim & Tom Solve Your Problems we solve a problem from a listener whose parents are potentially stealing his hard earned money. This week's episode is sponsored by Audible. Get a free 30 day trial and an audiobook download of your choice by going to audiblepodcast.com/everything.
16/01/151h 15m

Cereal

It’s the topic that the entire podcasting world is talking about: Cereal. This week we’re talking all about that stuff you eat in the morning that is mostly sugar. From Cap’n Crunch variants to the multitude of monster cereals on the market, we cover it all this week.
10/01/151h 3m

Secret Menu Items

From "animal style burgers" to burritos wrapped in quesadillas to unofficial McDonald's sandwiches with really disgusting names, we're talking about secret menu items this week. Ya know, for people who like to go into a fast food joint and order "off the menu." Also, Tim explains the Gilmore Girls to Tom and we have a very special announcement regarding the Tim & Tom Solve Your Problems theme song!
02/01/151h 4m

2014 Year In Review

2014 kinda stunk but it is our solemn duty to still recap it. This week we're talking all things 2014, along with bureaucracies, fingerprinting, North Korea and predictions for 2015, the year the hoverboard finally becomes a reality.
27/12/141h 6m

Stephen King

It's Christmastime, so this week we're doing an episode about noted horror novelist Stephen King. This guy does it all: writes books, has movies made based on his books, produces miniseries based on the same books successful movies have already been based on, and predicts the future in the books written by his pseudonym. Also, Tom gets a weird contraption for his back and we solve a problem from a listener who expects us to figure out his whole life for him.
19/12/141h 4m

Mars

Mars. The Red Planet. We've all heard of it, but how many of us have actually been there? The answer may surprise you. The answer is none. None of us have actually been there. But that's not going to stop us from talking about Total Recall, Terraforming, One-Way Trips, Biodomes and everything else you need to know about if you want to go to Mars. Also we solve a problem about a listener's friend who raps all the time.
13/12/141h 5m

Christmas Trees

This week we get in the holiday spirit and talk about Christmas trees. Tim helps Tom decide whether he should get a real tree that will make his dog sick and probably catch on fire, or a fake tree that will require him to empty out an entire room of his apartment for storage. We also take a look at reviews of classic books written by dumb children and solve a "problem" someone has because they get too much free wine. If you're doing your holiday shopping on Amazon this year, consider using tcgte.com/amazon. It's the same old Amazon, but your buddies Tim and Tom get a cut.
05/12/141h 7m

Soda

This week we're talking the fizzy stuff. Ya know, soda. All kinds of soda, but mostly just the mainstream stuff from Pepsi and Coke. Also this week we answer a listener problem concerning a boyfriend who might have a name fetish.
29/11/141h 6m

Uber

This week we talk about the recent controversies surrounding Uber, the car service run by bros. This somehow leads to heated conversation about the development of a real life Hoverboard. We also bring back the popular segment "A Particular Type of A****** You Didn't Know Existed Until The New York Times Pointed Them Out To You" and solve a listener problem from a young married woman. You can help us out by going to podsurvey.com/guide and taking a short, anonymous survey about your interests. If you do it, you'll be entered into an ongoing monthly raffle for a $100 Amazon gift card.
22/11/141h 15m

Toys R Us

The toy-giving season is coming up, and this week we're talking about the mother of all toy stores: Toys R Us. We talk about how difficult it was to get there as a child, the horrible idea of letting kids "test" toys while making their wish lists, the logistics of buying a video game as a child and FAO Shwarz, the high end toy store recently bought by Toys R Us. Also Tim has a foul smelling misadventure on the bus, Tom has some internet problems and we solve a problem about smoking cigarettes. Hey, did you can support the show and get some cool rewards? Check it out at tcgte.com/pledge.
14/11/141h 7m

Florida

This week Tim just can’t stop talking about Florida, where he just got back from tour and where he did not go to Disney World. Also Tim’s body can’t process alcohol, there are now Cronuts at Dunkin Donuts, the return of a classic segment Mundane Bucket List and the guys solve a problem about what to do when adults want to be your friend. You can help support TCGTE and get all kinds of cool rewards on Patreon at tcgte.com/pledge. And Tom has a new book out! You can get it at tcgte.com/tom.
08/11/141h 1m

Taylor Swift

This week we talk about the polarizing pop star Taylor Swift in a manner befitting two men in their 30s who have a tenuous grasp on what young people enjoy. We trace her career from her roots in country music to her current role as Global Welcome Ambassador for New York City, a place she has lived for 6 months. Oh well. Haters gonna hate hate hate hate hate. On this episode we also announce our Patreon campaign, which includes a new mini-podcast called Amazing Facts. If that sentence doesn't make any sense to you, check out tcgte.com/pledge for more info. And Tom has a new book out! You can get it at tcgte.com/tom.
31/10/141h 21m

Halloween Parties

This week we're talking Halloween parties. What to eat at 'em, what games to play, costumes to wear, you name it. If it's something you can or should do at a Halloween party, we're talking about it this week. We also solve a listener problem concerning what to do when you receive a gigantic framed print as a gift and don't want to put it up in your house.
27/10/141h 7m

Comic Con

This week we discuss a topic near and dear to Tom's heart: comic book conventions. We somehow obtained press passes to New York Comic Con, and we pulled out all the stops! (Actually, we just brought a tiny recorder with us and we kinda screwed it all up.) Listen as Tom gets excited about Batman stamps and Tim gets frightened by large crowds. Hear stories of Tom getting mad at everyone he encounters and Tim leaving and never coming back. Also, Tim gets very tired because he watches too many late night talk shows and Tom has issues with people wearing Google Glass.
20/10/141h 3m

Arcades

Arcades are back, and now you can drink alcohol there even if you aren’t a juvenile delinquent! This week we’re talking about the rise of “barcades” as well as remembering back to the arcades of our youth and Tom’s obsession with Sega’s Time Traveler holographic video game. Also, Tim and Tom discuss the upcoming New York Comic Con and solve a listener problem about what to do when an annoying co-worker wants to be your real life friend. This week's episode is brought to you by Audible. Get a free 30 day trial and an audiobook download of your choice by going totcgte.com/audible.
13/10/141h 4m

NYC Subway Vs London Tube

This week, we discuss a recent article in The Guardian in which a British journalist trashed the New York City subway system for being needlessly confusing and extremely disgusting. In the interest of fairness, we, as New Yorkers, discuss our impressions of the London Tube and rationally compare the two public transportation systems in a calm and reasonable manner. Also this week, Tom shows off his new iPhone that he bought after doing some ridiculous research, and we solve a listener's problem that causes Tim to reevaluate the way he lives his life. Read the original article about the NYC subway at the Guardian's website: http://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2014/sep/23/new-york-subway-homesick-london-underground-mta-map This week's episode is brought to you by Audible. Get a free 30 day trial and an audiobook download of your choice by going to tcgte.com/audible.
06/10/141h 9m

Derek Jeter

This week we discuss the retirement of one of baseball's brightest stars, Derek Jeter. If you don't know anything about Derek Jeter, don't worry -- we bring you up to speed very quickly. We also talk about a few of the more surprising aspects of his life, some of which are pretty shocking. But first, we discuss Tim's recent trip to Iceland, Tom's casting decisions for the Captain Marvel movie and the acclaimed film Rounders 2. And in a new installment of Tim & Tom Solve Your Problems, we tackle a question about a baby that says swear words.
28/09/141h 8m

Comic Book TV Shows (Fall 2014)

This week Tim’s on vacation so A.J. joins Tom to talk about something Tim would never want to: all the new comic book superhero TV shows coming to TV this fall. Tim and A.J. talk Tom’s trip to the NYC premiere of Gotham, the new season of Arrow, The Flash, Constantine, Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. and more. The guys also help an engineering intern try to figure out how to make his office stop smelling like fish in order to get him a job.
22/09/141h 3m

Apple Watch

This week we’re talking about the latest gizmo to completely change the world and allow you to finally forget about all of your problems: Apple Watch. Also, Tom explains to Tim the video game Destiny and we solve a listener problem concerning not liking seafood. This week's episode is brought to you by Amazon. Did you know that they now sell more than just books? It’s true! They started selling other stuff about 10 years ago. You can find out all about it at tcgte.com/amazon.
15/09/141h 7m

NYC Trendy Food

Cronuts, ramen burgers, gourmet chicken nuggets, who can keep track of all of these new trendy foods that you have to wait in line for hours and hours to acquire? We can, despite not having eaten many of the items. This week we run down the list of the hottest food trends in New York City and tell you why they’re stupid. Also, Tim and Tom solve a problem regarding a marriage proposal at a concert. This week's episode is brought to you by Audible. Get a free 30 day trail and an audiobook download of your choice by going to tcgte.com/audible.
08/09/141h 6m

Memes

If you're a person that uses the internet (and we suspect that you are), then one thing is for certain: you can't get enough MEMES!!!! In an episode we can't believe we haven't done in the past, Tom explains some of the most popular internet memes to a skeptical Tim. Naturally, this is followed by a fair amount of confusion, as well as a discussion of presidential hamburger-eating habits. But first, we talk about how we're celebrating Labor Day 2014 and give a definitive answer to a classic airplane etiquette question. And in a new installment of Tim & Tom Solve Your Problems, we help out a guy who needs to choose between romancing a bunch of girls over the internet or saying with one girl in real life. This week's episode is brought to you by Audible. Get a free 30 day trail and an audiobook download of your choice by going to tcgte.com/audible.
31/08/141h 6m

Emergency Preparedness

If there’s an emergency, are you prepared? You are if you have THIS episode. Tim and Tom discuss all the things you need to have in case of an emergency, like a hand crank radio, dehydrated food and constant entertainment. This week we also introduce a new segment called “Taking Care of Business” and solve a listener problem relating to Facebook birthday blues. This week's episode is brought to you by Audible. Get a free 30 day trail and an audiobook download of your choice by going to tcgte.com/audible.
24/08/141h 1m

Ice Cream

We're smack dab in the middle of summertime, so this week we're talkin' ice cream. And boy oh boy, do we have a lot of opinions about ice cream. If you enjoy listening to two grown men talking about desserts very passionately, this is the episode for you. We also coin a new phrase that is sure to take the world by storm, and solve a listener's problem about when to shake hands and when to hug. This week's episode is brought to you by Audible. Get a free 30 day trail and an audiobook download of your choice by going to tcgte.com/audible.
17/08/141h 9m

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

It’s Tim and Tom Talkin’ Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles! Except neither of them has seen the new movie, so mostly it’s just talking about the old movies, TV shows, video games, action figures, comic books, ice pops, pizza, etc. Also, Tim reveals what he played with as a child instead of action figures like a regular kid!
11/08/141h 7m

Personal Hygiene

This week we cover it all, folks: from baths to showers to brushing your teeth. Everything you need to know about proper personal hygiene is covered. Plus we explore a minor plot point in Back to the Future which may not make any sense, Tom refuses to explain why a cab hailing app has deemed him "influential," and Tim says something gross that needs to be bleeped out. Also we solve a problem from a listener that may or may not be made up. This week's episode is brought to you by Audible. Get a free 30-day trial and an audiobook of your choice by signing up at tcgte.com/audible.
03/08/141h 0m

Summer Concert Series

Summertime. You know it, we know it. What does it bring? Concerts! Sometimes these concerts have not one, not two, but sometimes three or more bands! We call these "summer concert series" sometimes. This week we talk about this young man's game as well as the time Tim and Tom went to see Radiohead and didn't understand how concerts work.
28/07/141h 3m

Fitness Trackers

This week, Tim tries to rebrand the podcast as a resource for consumers to compare products, beginning with fitness trackers in this episode. Tom doesn't seem all that interested in this plan and spends more time thinking about they lyrics of Stevie Wonder songs. Also, Tim is ready to leave New York City for good because his car was towed. This week's episode is brought to you by Audible. Get a free 30 day trial and an audiobook download of your choice by going to tcgte.com/audible.
21/07/141h 5m

Haunted Houses

This week we’re talking all about haunted houses! Ohhhhhhhhh! Scary! All kinds of haunted houses, from the dinky ones at small-time amusement parks like Adventureland, where Tim shut down an entire ride, to haunted walking tours all about horrific deaths. Also we solve a listener’s problem having to do with some inappropriate photos on a work computer. This episode is brought to you by Audible. For a free 30 day trial and an audiobook download of your choice, sign up at tcgte.com/audible.
14/07/141h 9m

Charles Manson

This week we talk about Charles Manson, a man famous for horrible things. Please be warned: Tim and Tom share what may be a somewhat controversial opinion: we don't like him. We make no apologies for this fact. Also we talk about old department stores and giving gum to the animals at the zoo! We also introduce our brand new segment "The Complete Guide Mailbag." Get in on the fun by sending us mail! Here's our address: The Complete Guide to Everything P.O. Box 395 Greenpoint Brooklyn, New York 11222-0395 This episode is brought to you by Audible. For a free 30 day trial and an audiobook download of your choice, sign up at tcgte.com/audible.
06/07/141h 8m

Horse Racing

This week we talk about Tim's trip to the horse track, which did not go well for him. Things go a little off the rails when we discuss the lineage of certain horses and what constitutes a "good horse." There's also a lot of talk about drinking smoothies, buying life-sized wax figures of George Clooney and opening a dangerous amusement park, as well as a staggering amount of product placement. In a brand new installment of Tim & Tom Solve Your Problems, we tackle a young man's question about an uncle who steals his cigarettes. This episode is brought to you by Audible. Get a free 30 day trial and an audiobook of your choice by going to tcgte.com/audible.
29/06/141h 10m

World Cup 2014 Brazil

World Cup Fever! This week we’re talking all about the world’s favorite sport: Non-American Football. Mostly though we talk about how Tom enjoys soccer, Tim is indifferent to it and they both agree that a lot of people in Brooklyn pretend to like it when the World Cup happens. Also the return of our world famous segment, The Mundane Bucket List. This week’s episode is sponsored by The Complete Guide to Everything, who encourage you to check out The Complete Guide to Everything: After Dark Volume 2! That’s right, another collection of exclusive episodes we recorded with 7 of our besties that are available only on this custom limited edition 4GB USB drive. Over 10 hours of content for only $20 right over at tcgte.com/store!
23/06/141h 4m

Algernon After Dark

This week, we offer you a taste of our other show, The Complete Guide to Everything: After Dark, mostly because we don't have an actual episode to put out. So instead, please enjoy this episode from the vault (recorded a couple years ago). If you've heard this episode already, we apologize. But listen to it again, maybe you'll hear some stuff you didn't pick up on the first time! We'll be back next week with a regular episode. Promise.
16/06/141h 18m

Going Off The Grid

Have you ever wanted to disappear completely and never be found? Are you afraid that sinister forces are watching your every move, and just wish you could get away from it all? Well, you probably won't find any practical information in this episode, but you will hear Tim & Tom contemplate how difficult it would be to live off the grid. Also, Tom floats the prospect of replacing Tim on the podcast with his dog, Tim shaves his beard out of paranoia, and we discuss what to do if you smell terrible and don't know it. In a new installment of Tim & Tom Solve Your Problems, we give advice to a teenager about how to properly channel teen angst. This week's episode is brought to you by Audible. Get a free 30 day trial and an audiobook download of your choice, go to tcgte.com/audible.
08/06/141h 5m

Soylent

This week we talk about the future of food, Soylent. If you don't know, Soylent is a goo that was created by tech industry folks that provides all the nutrients your body needs [probably], eliminating the need to eat regular food. It seems really weird, and the dude who invented it sounds kind of like a jerk. We discuss this, and also Tom gets angry at people who call pasta sauce "gravy." In a new installment of Tim & Tom Solve Your Problems, we help out a young person who has trouble scheduling a study schedule. Oh, and hey, Manchester and London: We are in your cities this week! There are still some tickets available and we would love to see you. Go to tcgte.com/tour for more info!
01/06/141h 4m

Conspiracy Theories (Night 2 in Manchester 2013)

The second night in Manchester as part of last year's UK/Ireland tour! Hear us talk all about crazy conspiracy theories from the internet, play games with the audience and solve problems LIVE on stage! If you're in Ireland or England there's still time to grab tickets! (Sorry Scotland, sold out.) Get all the info and buy tickets at tcgte.com/tour.
25/05/141h 40m

Twitter

This week we’re talking about the hot new website Twitter.com! We also spend an inordinate amount of time talking about a Morrissey Twitter account that turned out later in the week to be fake. From now on we’ll wait until the absolute last minute to record as always to make sure all of our facts are straight. Hey! We're coming to the UK and Ireland in less than a month! Get all the info and buy tickets at tcgte.com/tour.
19/05/141h 7m

Summer Movie Preview 2014 Part 2

Last week's episode was so wildly popular, we've extended the party for another hour! Because we only discussed a few of the blockbusters being released this summer, we are bringing you a second part of our annual Summer Movie Preview. Among the movies we talk about are Think Like A Man Too, Jupiter Ascending and Guardians of the Galaxy. Naturally, this leads to talk of the Matrix, Ghost Dad and for some reason, Family Feud. Also, Tom explains another bizarre dream, Tim mades a critical podcasting blunder, and we solve a problem from a listener who can't get his roommate to stop banging away on drums all day and night. Hey! We're coming to the UK and Ireland in less than a month! Get all the info and buy tickets at tcgte.com/tour.
12/05/141h 12m

Summer Movie Preview 2014

This week Tim's sick for a change and we're talking about the summer movies of 2014. Which summer movies of 2014 you ask? Well I'm so glad you asked. How about a little movie called X-Men: Days of Future Past! Or what about another tiny indie movie called GODZILLA!?! There's a few other as well since we only got up to about June before running out time since the plots of all the X-Men movies had to be explained to Tim in detail by Tom. BIG NEWS: We also announced the name of our Ireland/Scotland/England 2014 tour: The Teenagers and Alcohol Tour! You heard right, those are the two topics for our TCGTE shows joining Michael Jackson as our Pop Everything topic. More info and tickets at http://tcgte.com/tour
05/05/141h 11m

Mac And Cheese

This week we're talking about everyone's favorite meal, macaroni and cheese. It's the easiest (not to mention the cheesiest) quick meal option when you want to eat a bowl of something that will do gross things to your body. Tom explains how he discovered this the hard way when he microwaved himself up some discount truffle oil mac and cheese with a legitimately dangerous amount of saturated fat. Tim prefers to focus on some historical facts about mac and cheese which bores Tom nearly to death. We also discuss Adam Levine's various endorsement deals that lead us to believe he may be a teenager in disguise and we provide tips to avoid having your friends' parents exploit you on America's Funniest Home Videos. Finally, In a new installment of Tim & Tom Solve Your Problems, we read letters from two listeners with similar problems despite being at very different stages in their lives. This episode is sponsored by Audible. Get a free 30 day trial and an audiobook download of your choice at tcgte.com/audible.
27/04/141h 8m

Billy Joel

This week Tom’s complaining about museums selling his information when all he wants to do is look at some mummies and we talk about one of the most famous Long Islanders of all time: Billy Joel. We play some of his songs and everything, which kinda screws up the sound here and there but all in all it was well worth the extremely minimal effort. This week's episode is brought to you by Audible. Get a free audiobook download and 30-day trial by signing up at tcgte.com/audible.
21/04/141h 18m

Novelty Items

This week we talk about one of our favorite topics: novelty items used to pull pranks on your friends. From fake dog poop to hilarious toilet paper, we cover it all. Tim also proposes a business venture to Tom that would capitalize on their love of novelty items, but Tom is skeptical. First we talk about the logistics of maintaining George Washington's wooden teeth and which Founding Father would be the best morning zoo radio host. Tickets for our UK and Ireland shows are going fast! Get yours at tcgte.com/tour. And if you're coming to the shows, email us with the problems you want solved for a live version of Tim & Tom Solve Your Problems. This week's episode is brought to you by Audible. Get a free 30 day trial and an audiobook download of your choice at tcgte.com/audible.
13/04/141h 3m

Elementary School With Dan Deacon

This week we've got our old friend Dan Deacon on the show to talk about elementary school, a place where we all went together. Keep in mind, the majority of this episode is about finding pornographic magazines in the woods and is the absolute last thing anyone IN elementary school should listen to. We also solve some listener questions about exacting revenge on a neighbor who tears your wall down and advice on what to say during a valedictorian speech.
07/04/141h 13m

Virtual Reality

This week, things get technological as we discuss virtual reality. Among the questions we tackle: What is virtual reality? Why did Facebook buy Oculus? What is Oculus? What is Facebook? What ever happened to Virtual Boy, the Nintendo system from the mid-90s? Is it possible to use virtual reality to accurately simulate the sensation of kissing Juliette Lewis? Why is it so cold in cyberspace? We also talk about curing people of stab wounds by draining their blood and freezing them, stealing broaches from parties, and sneaking in to R-rated movies as a young teen. In a new installment of Tim & Tom Solve Your Problems, we answer an email from a listener who thinks he's some sort of big-shot funny man. This week's episode is brought to you by Audible. Get a free 30 day trial and an audiobook download of your choice by going to tcgte.com/audible.
31/03/141h 5m

Guitar Center

This week we’re talking about Guitar Center, which if you can believe this is an entire CENTER which sells guitars. But not only that, they also sell drum sticks and podcasting mixing boards. That makes this sound like it’s a sponsored episode, but once you listen to it it’ll be obvious that it is anything BUT. Also, the return of listener favorite segment: The Mundane Bucket List! This week’s episode is sponsored by us, The Complete Guide to Everything LIVE in Dublin, Edinburgh, Manchester and London is coming this Spring! Buy your tickets now or forever regret it!
24/03/141h 6m

Nuclear Power

This week, we discuss nuclear power, with Tom sounding like a corporate shill ever since watching a documentary about its benefits. Tim asks the tough questions about the harmfulness of radiation, the likelihood of obtaining super powers from nuclear waste and why we don't attach all of our waste to hot air balloons and send them into space. But first, there is some confusion about the logistics of Benjamin Button's reverse aging, we disagree about the merits of superhero movies and we're distracted by some bright studio lights. In a new installment of Tim & Tom Solve Your Problems, we help a listener who has questions about finding a girl who likes Doctor Who and a barista with a secret admirer. This week's episode is brought to you by Audible. Get a free 30 day trial and an audiobook download of your choice by going to tcgte.com/audible.
16/03/141h 3m

Hot Dogs

Live show announcement! Dublin, Edinburgh, Manchester and London, we’re coming back! Find out more at tcgte.com/tour! This week we talk about union strike inflatable rats, Ellen’s Oscars bits, and the new NYC bathroom membership options available. Also the McDonald’s Mighty Wings problem in dissected before a brief conversation about hot dogs. We also unveil a new segment: “Real-life Equivalents of Fictional Characters" and solve a problem involving going out on a first date with a cheapskate. This week's episode is brought to you by Audible. Get a free 30 day trial and an audiobook download of your choice by going to tcgte.com/audible.
10/03/141h 5m

Bitcoins

This week Tom schools Tim on his new favorite currency, bitcoins. Tom explains how bitcoins are mined, sold and spent, or at least how he THINKS it all works. And Tim nods along like an old grandpa pretending to understand because he doesn't really care. Also, Tim has a terrible encounter with a magician on a subway, we consider the merits of letting a 6 year-old ride the subway alone, and we solve a problem from a listener who was an accomplice to a "shrimping". This week's episode is brought to you by Audible. Get a free 30 day trial and an audiobook download of your choice by going to tcgte.com/audible.
02/03/141h 5m

The Oscars 2014

This week we’re talking about the 2014 Academy Awards. Who will win? Who do we think will win? Who do we think deserves to win? Find out all that and much more about Henry David Thoreau’s history with Street Fighters 2 in this week’s episode! This week’s episode is sponsored by Amazon Prime ( http://tcgte.com/prime ). Try Prime before February 26th in the UK and lock in your first year for only £49, including access to the all new Prime Instant Video library of over 15,000 movies and TV shows.
24/02/141h 7m

Cable TV

This week's episode is a ripped-from-the-headlines account of a big news story: the merger between Comcast and Time Warner Cable. Actually, it's more about how Tom got screwed by his local cable company and Tim's reminiscing of the time he was disappointed by the Playboy channel as a teenager. Also, Tom is excited by the prospect of listeners abandoning the podcast because of his dream recollections last week, and we discuss Tom's recent training in the art of archery. We also solve a problem from a listener who would rather go see Motorhead than spend time with his visiting parents. This week's episode is brought to you by Audible. Get a free 30 day trial and an audiobook download of your choice by going to tcgte.com/audible.
17/02/141h 2m

Traveling Into The Future With Anna Kendrick

Look, this is a weird one. We were going to do an episode about the Winter Olympics, but Tom was sick and instead we spent an hour talking about a dream Tom had where he time traveled into the future with Anna Kendrick and later met up with Tim who had a new iPad that Tom was worried would give him away as a time traveler. Also, Tom almost drowns during this episode at one point. We also solve a listener problem regarding his desire to one-up his girlfriend's Valentine's Day plans. This week's episode is brought to you by Audible. Grab any of their over 150,000 audiobooks INCLUDING TOM'S NEW AUDIOBOOK VERSION OF 'META' for free by going to tcgte.com/audible.
10/02/141h 6m

Super Bowl Commercials

It's the week of Super Bowl, folks, and everyone knows that the best part isn't the game itself, it's the commercials. In this episode we preview some of the most anticipated Big Game commercials and imagine what the best Tostitos commercial ever would look like. But first, Tom grills Tim on dip-related matters, Tim won't stop talking about one particular episode of the Cosby Show and we feature a very special halftime spectacular of our own. In a new Tim & Tom Solve Your Problems, we answer a listener's question about a relative that she can't shake. This weeks episode is brought to you by Audible. Get a free 30 day trial and an audiobook download of your choice by going to tcgte.com/audible.
02/02/141h 7m

Raising Children

This week we're talking about literally one of the easiest things anyone could ever do: raise children. Over the course of the hour we go through a lot of the common mistakes idiots make when trying to raise children, along with our solutions, along with a discussion about a troubled young person named Justin Bieber and the advice of Francis L. Thompson who claims to have raised 12 kids to not only be perfect children, but also excellent hot rod mechanics.
27/01/141h 9m

Fancy Suits

This week, hear about wearing fancy clothes from two guys who never wear fancy clothes. After being invited to serve as groomsmen (NOT broomsmen) in a friend's wedding, we have to a take a trip to get fitted for tuxedos. As a result, Tim is worried that his recent weird diet will screw up the way he looks in a tux when he gains his weight back and Tom has a serious question about ventriloquist dummies. Also this week, we talk about Doritos that taste like tacos that taste like Doritos and we solve two problems in a new installment of Tim & Tom Solve Your Problems: one about a wedding and one from a drunk baker. We also announce our upcoming live shows in London! We'll be sailing on a ship across the Atlantic Ocean to do shows on June 5, 6, and 7, 2014. Get more info at tcgte.com/tour!
19/01/141h 5m

Nancy Kerrigan & Tonya Harding Scandal

This week we're talking about something that happened 20 years ago: the Nancy Kerrigan & Tonya Harding Scandal! Learn all about the scandal that happened when Tim & Tom were barely young men and in no way involved. Also we talk about some jerk who tried to buy his way into the Olympics this year and failed, and we solve a listener problem involving the casual sex phone application Tinder. This week's episode is brought to you by US! Check out tcgte.com/store for a bunch of cool merchandise that'll make you the envy of your next bridge game.
13/01/141h 7m

Hangover Cures

In case you're still hungover from New Year's Eve, we cover all the various remedies available to deal with your throbbing headache and nausea. From greasy food and energy drinks to Gatorade and the "hair of the dog that bit you," we cover it all. Plus, we discuss how to purchase a pop star's hair from eBay without breaking their terms of service. But first, Tom overhears a strange conversation on a train, Tim has a theory about Duck Dynasty and we devise a Rube Goldberg machine that makes moonshine. And in another installment of Tim and Tom Solve Your Problems, we help a college girl who is too shy to talk to her crush. This week's episode is brought to you by Audible. Get a free 30 day trial and an audiobook download of your choice by visiting www.tcgte.com/audible.
06/01/141h 3m

2013 Year In Review

This week Tim finds out he wasn’t invited to the annual Complete Guide to Everything corporate Christmas party due to his behavior last year and we discuss the year that was: 2013. No stone is left unturned as we talk about the year’s biggest celebrity break-ups, “buzzwords” and other “events”. Also we give an Englishman advice about how to woo American women by acting like Hugh Grant. This week's episode is brought to you by Audible. Get a free audiobook download and 30-day trial by signing up at http://tcgte.com/audible.
30/12/131h 6m

Christmas Shopping

This week, while other podcasts are taking the week off, we are giving invaluable advice regarding last minute Christmas shopping. Tom in particular has a lot of advice to give, as he has not bought any presents for anybody as of 3 days before Christmas. As he explains, he's been too busy getting riled up by the local news. Tim, on the other hand, has all his shopping done, with enough time left over to come up with ideas about how to get beat up by Best Buy security guards and score a huge cash settlement. In a new installment of Tim & Tom Solve Your Problems, we tackle a bizarre problem from a running enthusiast regarding some mysterious puke. Merry Christmas everyone! This week's episode is brought to you by Audible. Get a free 30 day trial and audiobook download of your choice by going to www.tcgte.com/audible.
23/12/131h 4m

Home Alone 2

This week we’re talking Home Alone 2, and nothing but Home Alone 2. Except of course for the first like 20 minutes or so where Tim recounts a harrowing tale of a hamburger delivery gone wrong. But then after that, it’s like almost all Home Alone 2 talk. Is Home Alone 2 just a direct rip-off of Home Alone 1? Or have the events of Home Alone 1 made Kevin McCallister into a sociopathic monster hell-bent on ruining his family’s life and torturing criminals for his own sadistic pleasure? Also, we discuss whether the Occupy Wall Street movement should have used Peter McCallister (the father) as the symbol of corporate greed for everyone to rally against. This week's episode is brought to you by Audible. Get a free audiobook download and 30-day trial by signing up at http://tcgte.com/audible.
16/12/131h 8m

Drones

This week we drone on about drones (HAHA just kidding, that's just a joke... a preview of some of the hilarity you'll hear in this episode), but not the controversial scary kind. Tom has become obsessed with Amazon's recently announced prototypical drone delivery service and has some big plans for when its implemented. We also talk about an encounter on the street with a few colorful characters of varying levels of attractiveness and we discuss the job of "futurist" as a possible career path. And in a new installment of Tim & Tom Solve Your Problems, we discuss a listener's question about her devotion to her pets. This week's episode is brought to you by Audible. Get a free audiobook download and 30-day trial by signing up at tcgte.com/audible.
09/12/131h 4m

Open Letters

This week Tim discusses having to find a new chiropractor who isn’t a racist, and his extensive collection of swords and letter openers. The idea of the Joker surrounding himself with henchmen with heart conditions is dissected before moving onto the main topic: Open Letters. We discuss a man’s open letter to a restaurant demanding an employee be fired for not letting him wear his $1,500 creep toy as well as Sinead O’Connor’s open letter to Miley Cyrus. We also solve a listener problem concerning being on the other end of unrequited love while trying not to ruin Christmas for everyone. This week's episode is brought to you by Audible. Get a free audiobook download and 30-day trial by signing up at tcgte.com/audible.
02/12/131h 4m

Thanksgiving

It's the time of year for Tim and Tom's favorite holiday, Thanksgiving. Apparently we haven't done an episode about this yet (we checked Wikipedia and everything!) so we try to make it as comprehensive as possible. This mostly entails discussing which ABBA songs we think Harry Styles is aware of and the things that annoy us about Morrissey. Also, we talk about how confusing the story of "The First Thanksgiving" is for kids, and Tim remembers a Thanksgiving essay he wrote as a 7 year old that got him in trouble with his teacher. We also announce that our brand new t-shirts and tote bags are available at tcgte.com/store, but it's not like a commercial at all. It's more like two podcasters at the top of their game just riffing, ya know what I mean? You won't even realize you're being marketed to. This week's episode is brought to you by Audible. Get a free 30 day trial and an audiobook download of your choice at tcgte.com/audible!
25/11/131h 3m

Personal Finance

This week we’re talking about personal finance, and to kick it off we decide to talk about a bunch of things we don’t understand, such as the iPhone app Bitstrips, the NSA, running robots, soldiers’ personal assistants, Second Life destroying relationships, addicting iPhone games and Snapchat. Later Tom rants about the new fancy pants “Coin” credit credit bluetooth do-hicky for your phone while simultaneously defending his nerd watch, leading to Tim demanding to go through Tom’s wallet card by card live on air. Tim also talks about the time his identity was stolen and resulted in fraudulent adult website charges on his credit card as Tom explains how he uses American Express as his own personal small business bully before explaining his plans to sell his PS4 to a spoiled child. We also solve a listener problem from a college guy who’s girlfriend doesn’t want anyone to know she’s his girlfriend. This week's episode is brought to you by Audible. Get a free audiobook download and 30-day trial by signing up at tcgte.com/audible.
18/11/131h 11m

Coffee Shop Etiquette

This week we talk about how people should act every morning when they get their cup of coffee. But first, we discuss why you probably shouldn't buy a ukelele if you live in Brooklyn and the surprising fact that hipsters haven't built their own planes. Also this week, Tom decides that he will be more assertive and offers a lot of opinions about a number of different things that may or may not be relevant to the topic at hand. Tim is upset with the attitudes of people who work on television shows that film in his neighborhood and has some ideas about how they can better behave when in coffee shops. Finally, we solve a problem of a listener who is moving to a new city and wants to avoid another potential new resident. This week's episode is brought to you by Audible. Get a free 30 day trial and audiobook download at tcgte.com/audible.
11/11/131h 3m

Writing A Novel

This week we’re talking about writing a novel because guess what? Tom wrote a novel. We also discuss some other guy who uses the pseudonym of Tom Reynolds, SAG name rules, the other Mark Wahlberg and maybe the most horrific episode of a game show ever thanks to Fox’s now canceled ‘Moment of Truth’. After that’s out of the way attention is turned to NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month), where thousands and thousands of people around the world try to crank out a full length novel in just one month’s time. We give advice from famous writers whose names we cannot remember, talk about Stephen King’s thirst for revenge, and take a look at Amazon’s Top Ten Bestselling Books of 2012 and look at how to take elements from all of them to guarantee yourself a spot on 2014’s list. This week's episode is brought to you by Audible. Get a free audiobook download and 30-day trial by signing up at tcgte.com/audible.
04/11/131h 6m

Jury Duty

This week we hear the epic tale of Tom's recent time spent at the local courthouse. No, he wasn't once again accused of a crime he didn't commit, he was there for jury duty. Who was there with him? Well, a famous movie star you might know. (Michael Rapaport, perhaps? No, not Michael Rapaport.) And a judge and some bailiffs… you know, the whole gang. Also, Tim talks about a recent marathon of the television show Extreme Couponing he watched for 8 hours, and we discuss whether or not it is possible to buy gold doubloons from the government. Finally, in a new installment of Tim and Tom Solve Your Problems, we tackle a problem from a listener named Aaron who had his name ruined by a funny sketch. This episode is sponsored by Squarespace, the best and easiest way to build your own websites. Check them out at www.squarespace.com/tcgte.
27/10/131h 6m

Home Invasion

This week’s episode starts off with the exciting announcement that Tom has used a whole container of milk for the first time in his adult life. Of course, this then leads to a conversation about making butter in Kindergarten and which is better: Seamless or Delivery.com. Later in the episode we discuss possibly living solely on emergency rations and Tim talks about wanting to to change his name to Sam Malone and the proximity of White Castle to his new apartment before recounting the terrifying tale of coming home to find all of his doors unlocked and open. Finally the episode ends with Tim and Tom solving a problem involving what kind of gift to buy a boss and Tom announces that he wrote a book and didn’t tell anyone about it. This week's episode is brought to you by Audible. Get a free audiobook download and 30-day trial by signing up at tcgte.com/audible.
21/10/131h 13m

Electronic Dance Music

This week we discuss Electronic Dance Music (EDM), an entire genre of music that Tim just learned about by reading an article in the New Yorker, officially making him an irrelevant old man. To be fair, Tom doesn't really understand much about it either, and the two of us just fumble our way through trying to decipher something that is meant for people much, much younger and cooler than us. Also, Tim has trouble canceling internet service and must come up with a big lie to avoid offending a customer service representative, and Tom tries his hand at vigilanteism when he witnesses what may possibly be a crime outside his window. Finally, we announce a brand new addition to the Complete Guide family, a new podcast called "Pop Everything" that begins this Thursday! Check it out on iTunes or at tcgte.com. This episode is sponsored by Squarespace. Check them out at www.squarespace.com.
13/10/131h 8m

Modern Art

This week we’re talking about something neither of us is qualified to talk about in anyway whatsoever: Modern Art! But before the conversation gets all hoity-toity we discuss Tom’s love of summertime and seasonal beers. We also discuss the merits of possibly just putting MSG on all the food you eat to make it delicious and Tom recounts the time he ruined a turf soccer field by bleeding all over it. As far as artists are concerned, we cover everyone from Banksy to Hanksy, making stops in between to discuss graffiti as an art form, adults who skateboard, Miley Cyrus, @Horse_ebooks, Sting’s real meaning behind The Police’s ‘The Bed’s Too Big Without You’, Tilda Swinton, Jennifer Aniston, Marina Abramović, and all the nuns Tim has been hanging out with recently. This week's episode is brought to you by Audible. Get a free audiobook download and 30-day trial by signing up at tcgte.com/audible.
07/10/131h 7m

Claire Danes

This week, we have a bit of a miscommunication in the scheduling department, and an interview with a popular Hollywood starlet that Tim thinks was going to happen is put in jeopardy. As we wait for the possible arrival of Claire Danes we talk about Tom's trip to a pet store and Tim's encounter with a crusty old hippie biker. We also discuss Tim's unfortunate run-in with Claire Danes at a Beck concert in 1997 and a more positive encounter with her My So Called Life co-star Jared Leto at a clothing store. Additionally, Tom shares his strong feelings regarding bands with movie stars as members. In a new installment of Tim & Tom Solve Your Problems, we tackle a gross problem about a hoarder roommate and answer a question about Breaking Bad. (No spoilers, we promise!) This episode is sponsored by Squarespace. Check them out at www.squarespace.com/tcgte9.
29/09/131h 14m

GTA V

This week we're talking about the video game that has already made literally $1 billion dollars: Grand Theft Auto V! As you might expect, Tom has basically lived his life inside the game since it was released while Tim is only vaguely aware that it's even out. We also luckily have some time to talk about Tim experiencing deja vu all over again, the idea of waiting in a line for a video game, Elton John, and of course Teen Jeopardy. We also solve a listener problem concerning their brother's girlfriend hitting on her boyfriend presumably years ago. This week's episode is brought to you by Audible. Get a free audiobook download and 30-day trial by signing up at tcgte.com/audible.
23/09/131h 11m

Veterinarians

This week, Tom takes the helm and is given free reign to talk about anything he wants. Naturally, he turns the conversation to dog-related matters, recounting a recent trip to a hipster veterinarian. We also talk about the logistics of veterinarians treating all different kinds of animals and whether or not you can accurately treat a dog's illnesses with information you find on the internet. Rounding out the animal talk, we discuss the strange case of a missing pet parrot that haunts the neighborhood. In a new installment of Tim & Tom Solve Your Problems we tackle problems regarding giving oneself a nickname and hanging out with feuding friends. This week's episode is sponsored by Squarespace. Check them out at squarespace.com/tcgte9.
15/09/131h 13m

Fall TV Preview 2013

This week starts off with some confusion about Fleet Week and Fashion Week along with some good suggestions about where to go out on interesting dates even if you're a moleman. Tim and Tom then compare their tastes in board shorts before Tim quizzes Tom about baby etiquette at restaurants. All of this of course leads to this year's Fall TV Preview where we discuss the new shows Almost Human, The Crazy Ones, Dracula, Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D., Masterchef Junior, Masters of Sex, and The Million Second Quiz. We also solve a listener email concerning a stuck-up roommate and offer some dire warnings in regards to snakepeople. This week's episode is brought to you by Audible. Get a free audiobook download and 30-day trial by signing up at tcgte.com/audible.
08/09/131h 7m

French Fry Burgers And Secret Ingredients

It's hot in the Complete Guide studio this week, causing all sorts of mayhem. Tom's selfish use of a portable fan causes a rift in a friendship, while the heat causes something to come loose in Tim's brain, resulting in a movie pitch about Michael Jackson's faked death that is somehow tied to some Mrs. Doubtfire-esque shenanigans in the White House. Also, Tim delves into his new life as a man who comments on articles on the internet. But ultimately this week, we have food on the mind, breaking down the uproar over the recently announced French Fry Burger from Burger King and Tom is upset that some products purport to have secret ingredients. In a new installment of Tim & Tim Solve Your Problems, we help a beatboxing champion turned plumber map out the rest of his life, and give some sleuthing advice regarding a mysterious building in Tokyo. This week's episode is sponsored by Squarespace. Check them out at squarespace.com/tcgte.
01/09/131h 7m

Magicians

This week we talk about how Tom's not going to the VMAs while Tim proposes a number of Robin Thicke / Alan Thicke Mash-ups. There's also discussion regarding the current lack of magic shops and spy shops getting muscled out. Tim tells a story about the time Penn and Teller were used as a ruse to watch the Playboy Channel, and the time Tim and Tom went to go see David Blane buried alive. The magic talk wraps up with a remembrance for The Masked Magician who revealed all the magician's secrets on Fox, before finally leading up to what everyone's come here for: Tom's thoughts on Ben Affleck as Batman.
26/08/131h 19m

Another Episode About Video Games

This week, we were all set to record a thrilling episode all about magic and magicians, with a bunch of super interesting anecdotes and jokes, but then Tom started talking about video games and when Tom starts talking about video games, well, it's kinda hard to stop him. You just gotta let him tire himself out. So video games it is, folks. We talk about the newest systems that will be hitting the market later this year: the XBox One and the PS4, as well as why Grand Theft Auto is actually bad for society and why it is that the trashiest kids in your elementary school had the most video game systems. Also, Tim considers the value of video games when you reach a point in your life when you realize all your hopes and dreams have died. This week's episode is brought to you by Audible. Get a free 30 day trial and a free audiobook download by going to tcgte.com/audible.
19/08/131h 6m

Trains

Tim finally crosses off an item on the ol' Mundane Bucket List by finally staying in a sleeper car on a train. This week we're talking about riding the rails, whether it's via First Class like Tim or hoping in an open box car as it ambles through a country field. The future of train travel is also discussed as we debate the merits of Elon Musk's "Hyperloop", which will get you from San Francisco to Los Angeles in under 30 minutes by going 1,102 km/h. This of course leads to an intellectual argument about musks and colognes. Finally this week we also officially unveil the winner of the Tim and Tom Solve Your Problems Theme Song Sweepstakes and solve a listener problem concerning being blocked on all social networks after telling off a friend. This week's episode is brought to you by Audible. Get a free audiobook download and 30-day trial by signing up at tcgte.com/audible.
12/08/131h 11m

Tim And Tom Solve Even More Of Your Problems

This week we put on our problem solving pants and dig into the ol' mailbag for an episode-length version of Tim & Tom Solve Your Problems. We solve problems about sharing a home with your significant other, asking a girl out on a date in a world in which John Lennon has devalued the concept of love (this one's a little complicated) and having your co-workers think you've fathered a child that you haven't. We also unveil a new crop of entries in our contest to find a Tim & Tom Solve Your Problems theme song. (Go over and vote for your favorite at facebook.com/completeguide.) Also, Tom isn't allowed to talk about Doctor Who, and is incensed by Tim's 20+ minute rant on the topic of Jeopardy Kids Week. But seriously, something pretty awful happened on Jeopardy this week, and Tim just wants to be sure that a young contestant gets the recognition he deserves. This week's episode is brought to you by Audible. Get a free 30-day trial and audiobook download by going to www.tcgte.com/audible.
05/08/131h 10m

Batman Vs. Superman The Movie

This week we're of course talking about a movie that isn't coming out for two years, doesn't even have an official title, and very little information has been released about: Batman Vs. Superman. Also this week we discuss Tim's upcoming train vacation and go over five entries into the new Tim and Tom Solve Your Problems song contest, almost half of which are disqualified immediately. We also solve a listener email about whether he should try to date his best friend's sister long distance. This week's episode is brought to you by Audible. Get a free audiobook download and 30-day trial by signing up at tcgte.com/audible.
28/07/131h 8m

Being Lazy

This week, on account of the obscenely high temperatures in New York, we discuss the best ways to be lazy. Ya know, to conserve energy and whatnot. From dropping off your laundry at a laundromat with a surly hipster employee instead of doing it yourself, to buying an electronic Spin the Bottle game so you don't have to spin some bottle like a rube just to kiss somebody in the context of a game situation, we have every lazy trick covered. Also, in a new installment of Tim & Tom Solve Your Problems, we give advice to a high school ski bum who doesn't think wooing girls is worth his time. This week's episode is brought to you by Audible. Get a free 30 day trial and audiobook download at tcgte.com/audible.
22/07/131h 7m

Amazing Facts!

This week, Tim and Tom vie for the coveted title of Factmaster General of TCGTE in an epic showdown of incredible proportions. We try to outdo each other with amazing facts, to see who has the number one most amazing fact of all amazing facts. We relay some interesting info about the Three Stooges, the Empire State Building, the human brain, the universe and much more. Also, we talk about building RVs for New York City living, the legality of touching parked cars that don't belong to you and the second book of the Hunger Games. This week's episode is sponsored by Audible. Get a free 30 day trial and audiobook download by visiting tcgte.com/audible.
15/07/131h 7m

The Beach

This week we're talking about one of everyone's favorite summer destinations: the beach! Well, more specifically we're talking about Tim's trip to the beach this week that ended up with his arm in a sling. Also discussed: illegal ice cream vendors, new types of beach bros that are really into knowledge in all its forms, terrifying things in the ocean like sea snakes and some summer beach tips. Lastly we solve a listener problem concerning what to do in a lab over the summer when everyone else is gone. This week's episode is brought to you by Audible. Get a free audiobook download and 30-day trial by signing up at tcgte.com/audible.
08/07/131h 7m

Board Games

This week, Tim and Tom tackle the riveting topic of board games, which contrary to popular belief are not games you play when you're bored, but rather games that you play with a board. We discuss Tom's secret to Trivial Pursuit success, the "re-discovered" actual rules to Monopoly and tailoring a version of Guess Who to college fraternities. But before all this, Tim has a question about proper deli ordering procedure and we try to get to the bottom of what Elmer Fudd was really doing out there in the woods. In a new installment of Tim and Tom Solve Your Problems, an amateur sleuth from the UK asks for advice regarding a bathroom situation at work. This week's episode is sponsored by Audible. Get a free 30 day trial and audiobook download at tcgte.com/audible.
01/07/131h 9m

Dog Fostering

This week a discussion of the elaborate post-production process that each episode goes through and Tim gets taken to the cleaners at the local lube shop. Also, Tom fosters a dog which of course leads to a heated discussion about Webster versus Diff'rent Strokes. The rest of the episode is pretty much just a blow by blow recounting of Tom's fostering a dog which is later revealed to have spent almost the entire episode snotting into Tim's sweatshirt.
23/06/131h 4m

Superman

It's a bird! It's a plane! It's two guys sitting around talking into microphones about Superman for a little while! This week, Tim and Tom discuss the new, darker turn Superman has taken in the new Man of Steel movie, memories of the Batman/Superman cartoon show, the finest portrayal of Superman in any medium (Lois and Clark: The New Adventures of Superman), Smallville, the time Superman died and everyone bought a thousand copies of the comic and some other stuff. Also, we argue a lot about Batman, because that's kind of "our thing." But first, Tom talks about the time he gave some ungrateful young adults directions on the subway and Tim talks about a Foreigner concert he saw at a baseball game. And on a new installment of Tim & Tom Solve Your Problems, we tackle an iPhone-related marital issue and Tim asks listeners to write a theme song for the segment, with a lot of qualifiers. This week's episode is brought to you by Audible. Get a free audiobook download and 30-day trial by signing up at tcgte.com/audible.
17/06/131h 9m

Conspiracy Theories (Retilians, JFK and Dinosaurs) - Live in Manchester on March 18, 2013

This week we're putting out a live episode from our somewhat recent Europe tour. This is the first night in Manchester at The King's Arms. Included are some stories about us visiting an optical illusion museum in Edinburgh and almost missing our flight from Dublin because we're extremely out of shape. This episode also marks the first time Tim tries out some of his new topical political humor on a Manchester audience before we get into the real topic of the show: Conspiracy Theories. We manage to cover reptilian humanoids living amongst us, the connection between the JFK assassination and Billy Joel, as well as whether or not dinosaurs still live. We also introduce a completely new audience participation segment called "Real Conspiracy Theory or Something Tom Made Up" and trot out an old favorite "The Mundane Bucket List". Before closing out this super-sized episode we also solve some audience problems concerning invisible bears and roommates who lie about attending university. Videos referenced in this episode: Shapeshifting Reptilian caught on camera during Antique Roadshow? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xLe1jHjR58A Dog Drives Power Wheel Car by Himself http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qh6vttHOzpA REAL LIVE DINOSAUR footage CAUGHT ON TAPE! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kvmWOKMpFZ0 PTEROSAUR filmed in flight, Yantai City, Shandong Province, China. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W2s0U44Z3hg
09/06/131h 34m

NYC Tourism Part 1

This week, due to popular demand, we talk about the things that people should do when they visit New York City. Ya know, The Big Apple. The City That Never Sleeps. Birthplace of the Churro. We discuss some of the more touristy destinations like Times Square (particularly the M&Ms Store), the Statue of Liberty and the Empire State Building. This, for some reason, leads to a lot of talk about Roy from Siegfried and Roy. Before we get into that, though, Tom tells a couple riveting stories about motorcycles and pizza flavored snack food products. Some really great, interesting stories. Then we solve a coward's question in another installment of Tim and Tom Solve Your Problems. This week's episode is sponsored by Audible. Get a free 30 day trial and a free audiobook download at tcgte.com/audible.
02/06/131h 10m

Binge Watching

This week, in honor of the premiere of the new season of Arrested Development, we discuss the new way of watching television (according to blogs): Binge Watching. We share our opinions on the wisdom of watching eight hours of television at one time, the uselessness of Nielsen Ratings and how terrible 24 is when episodes are watched back to back. But first, we talk about a Jeopardy contestant with a strange anecdote in the contestant interview, Tim gets his hands on a soundboard and Tom gets angry and we pitch an idea for a Netflix series called "House of Cars". After some real talk about "I Love Lucy" we solve a problem from a listener who is having trouble making friends at a new school and offer some tetherball-related advice. This week's episode is brought to you by Audible. You can get a free audiobook download and 30 day trial at tcgte.com/audible. Also, subscribe to our YouTube channel at youtube.com/tcgte and help us to do fun video stuff in the future!
26/05/131h 7m

The Complete Guide to Nothing in Particular: The Squeakquel

In this episode, a sequel (or "squeakquel") to an episode from 2010, we discuss an array of topics. We cover selling broken iPads on eBay, Michael Jackson, wearing jeans to basketball practice, buying school gym coaches football hats and eating gummy vitamins as an adult. Also, Tom tells a story about a recent heart attack victim concerned with a child's safety at a Wendy's fast food restaurant and Tim tells a story about a 4 year old getting injured at a miniature golf establishment and seeking refuge in a 1980s Taco Bell. This week's episode is brought to you by Audible. Get a free audiobook and a 30 day trial by going to tcgte.com/audible. Do it!
20/05/131h 3m

Biking

This week Tim discovers a fun new activity for Saturday night's if you're tired of going to the dog park week after week. Also the guys discuss biking! Well, mostly Tom discuses the arduous task of receiving a free bicycle helmet from the city of New York while Tim accuses him of taking advantage of the government. NYC's upcoming Citibike program is talked about in hazy detail and we solve a viewer problem concerning a young lady's Special Ops. boyfriend who wants to have fun being single. Also don't forget to head over to tcgte.com/audible to grab a 30 free trial of Audible and a free audiobook of your choosing! Seriously. Pick anyone you want. See if we care. It's yours.
13/05/131h 5m

Fancy Restaurants

This week we're talking fancy restaurants, but what conversation about fancy restaurants would be complete without first looking back at Prince's most erotic songs from early in his career? No conversation, that's what. After that we jump right into fancy restaurants starting with our favorite restauranteur Gordon Ramsay. Not only is he the world's foremost authority on whether food is raw or not, he has a number of restaurants Tom has been to which Tim claims are not fancy despite never having been himself. Tim and Tom also discuss the number of fancy and not quite fancy restaurants they spent money at at while in Europe out of fear that it would be robbed from them eventually anyway. This leads to a long argument about the merits of wine and whether a single person on earth can tell the difference between different bottles. The episode closes out with Tim's readings from a book on restaurant etiquette from the Emily Post Institute and a discussion of the now movie from Splitsider Presents called The Exquisite Corpse Project which you should totally buy.
06/05/131h 11m

Summer Movies 2013 Part 2

This week we bring you the second part of our annual summer movie roundup, and almost make it through the films coming out in June. We cover After Earth (which apparently is some Will Smith movie that is coming out), The Purge, The Internship, Man of Steel and talk about the difference between Robert Downey Jr. and Morton Downey Jr. Also, we talk about what makes for a good anecdote in Jeopardy's contestant interview segment, the bizarre pervasiveness of burlesque acts in Brooklyn and we solve a listener's problem about choosing a best man for his wedding.
29/04/131h 5m

Summer Movies 2013

Even though it's Spring, it's still time for this Summer's blockbuster movies to premiere and Tim and Tom are here with their preview. This week they look at Oblivion, Iron Man 3, Hangover Part 3, Fast and Furious 6, The Great Gatsby and Star Trek Into Darkness which doesn't even get them out of the month of May. The merits of 3D and 4D movies are also argued as well as an agreement that all movies should be much, much shorter. Also Tim's feeling great this week after a visit to his doctor reveals a health concern which is delivered to him in the middle of the night. This week's episode concludes with a return of the popular 'Particular Type of Asshole You Didn't Know Existed Until The New York Times Pointed Them Out To You' segment where the new trend of toilet training infants is covered in full.
22/04/131h 3m

The Complete Guide to The Complete Guide to Everything

It's our 200th episode, so Tim and Tom decide to celebrate by getting very self indulgent! This week we turn the focus of the show onto the show itself and tell a couple of very long, semi-interesting stories about how the show started and how a presumed stalker almost ruined it all. We also play a rare clip from our previous podcast that you've never heard! In a very special Tim and Tom Solve Your Problems we solve a particular problem that we've never quite faced bfore. And to top it off, Tom tells a story of a less than exciting encounter with a television prank show. This episode is brought to you by MailChimp, a great service that we use ourselves. Check it out at mailchimp.com.
19/04/131h 27m

Wrestling

This week's episode begins with the disappointment that Tim and Tom were unable to attend this year's Wrestlemania and the full intention of doing the episode about a different subject entirely before the power of Wrestlemania flat-out demands that they instead indeed talk almost exclusively about wrestling. Of course this means talking about the recent Hulk Hogan Uncensored at the Beacon Theatre that neither attended, a nearly screenplay accurate recounting of the Wrestling Buddies (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XllxxslzkGU) commercial and Tim's close encounter with a Murphy bed. Also discussed in depth this week: Tom's legacy as a two-term class president in high school and his attempts at recreating a wrestling fundraiser he and Tim both attended as young children where Jimmy "Superfly" Snuka screamed at him. This episode is brought to you by MailChimp, a great service that we use ourselves. Check it out at mailchimp.com.
19/04/131h 3m

Easter

This week, despite our stated policy of not discussing anything even vaguely religious, we talk about Easter, which apparently is a very important Christian holiday. Mostly we just talk about candy, including Tom's dangerous addiction to Cadbury Eggs. We also talk about a large scale, highly competitive Easter egg hunt from Tom's childhood, coordinated by a local creepy elderly couple. Most importantly, we discuss the very serious issues of getting lollipops at the bank, drinking beer with alcoholic ATMs and Tim announces his plans to take all his money out of the bank and keep it handcuffed to him at all times. This episode is brought to you by MailChimp, a great service that we use ourselves. Check it out atmailchimp.com.
19/04/131h 4m

Urban Legends: Disney Theme Parks

This week Tim and Tom deliver a pre-taped episode recorded before their European tour which of course leads with an extensive conversation about the possibility of the episode being automatically released after their inevitable plane crash. Tim also has a lot of questions about the frail old man serving as Tom's personal butler for all of these years. Some of the many, many urban legends around Disney Theme Park that are addressed this week include the infamous Club 33, the parks' rules around long-hairs, whether or not anyone at the park has ever been pronounced dead on the premises, and some unusual requests in Walt Disney's will surrounding the first man to become pregnant and presumably isn't Arnold Schwarzenegger. Finally the guys solve a listener problem concerning a large VHS purchase recently made at a flea market, of course.
19/04/131h 12m

Subway Etiquette

This week, seasoned subway riders Tim and Tom discuss the most appropriate behavior when traveling on the NYC subway system. Answering questions like "When is it appropriate to shame someone on the internet for sitting in a seat designated for the handicapped?" (which sends Tim into a rage), "When is it appropriate to bring furniture onto the subway?" and "Should I bring a large uncovered pot of soup onto the train?" we leave no stone unturned. Also, Tom talks about a man playing Misfits covers at 8 a.m., and we imagine what it would be like if everyone in America started eating frogs legs. Also, we solve a problem from a listener who has a friend that constantly talks about annoying stuff. This episode is brought to you by MailChimp, a great service that we use ourselves. Check it out at mailchimp.com.
19/04/131h 6m

Supermarket Shopping

This week we take on the thrilling subject of purchasing your food at the supermarket, a process that often confounds Tim and Tom despite that they are grown men in their 30s.  In this episode we talk about getting into altercations with experienced shoppers in supermarkets, the merits of leaving milk in the refrigerator until it solidifies for easier disposal, tricking your children into thinking your favorite cereal is health food, the many infurating new flavors of mayonnaise and the strange cases of Miracle Whip and Cool Whip. This episode is sponsored by MailChimp, a great service we use ourselves. Check it out at mailchimp.com.
19/04/131h 2m

Martial Arts

This week we talk about Martial Arts, because we've both been endlessly fascinated by people punching and kicking each other. First, we recap our NYC live show and our experience at an open mic comedy night in which the comedian is a horrible racist. Then Tim talks about a Judo championship match he is attending because of the prospect of free beer, and Tom reminisces about being a teenager and studying the art of karate in a strip mall dojo alongside a sad man in his 30s. Then, we solve a problem from a listener who is dating a man considerably older than her. This week's episode is brought to you by MailChimp, a great service we use ourselves. Check it out at mailchimp.com.
19/04/131h 11m

Tim & Tom Solve Your Friend-Making, Friend-Ending and DVD Lending Problems

Tim starts off by promising this will be an all karaoke episode but quickly loses interest and begins discussing the harmonies in Neil Young songs at detail instead. Instead the guys decide to do an all Tim and Tom Solve Your Problems to officially open the gates for listeners to send in their problems for the upcomingNew York City and European shows in March. The first problem is a follow-up from Terrence, who previously wrote in to complain about not being able to attract girls as easily now that he works for a non-profit. Now he wants to know how to make friends as a single man in his 30s. This of course leads to a discussion of old grizzled surfer guys, the time Tim did a 360 on a boogie board and the time he almost killed himself trying to surf. Tom explains the difference between wet suits and dry suits and Tim's parents buy a young Tim a custom-made bootleg Scottie Pippin jersey. Lastly Tim and Tom solve Katrina's problem concerning her male BFF systematically working his way through all of her friends' pants and Carolyn asks us to solve her problem concerning the return of The Office DVDs lent to a friend a long time ago.
19/04/131h 9m

Meteors

This week we talk about the latest terrifying meteor and asteroid events that made us all think that we might possibly die suddenly and without warning at any time. We also discuss NASA's starting lack of telescopes, the difference between an asteroid and a meteor and why Fred Flintstone was kind of a jerk. Also, Tim tells a tale of an aggressive truck driver who might be tracking him down to do him harm, we announce a New York live show (March 1st at UCB East) and we hear from someone on the "inside" at McDonald's who we plan to get special information from. This week's episode is brought to you by MailChimp, a great service that we use ourselves. Check them out at www.mailchimp.com.
19/04/131h 3m

McDonald's Part 2: The Return of the Arch Deluxe

This week, we go further down the McDonald’s rabbit hole and discuss the strange case of the Arch Deluxe, a hamburger marketed towards adults, and how kids everywhere thought that this pepper- flavored burger might convince their parents to eat fast food seven nights a week. We also talk about the brief history of hot dogs at the Golden Arches, which were banned for being “unhygienic” and debate whether or not Chicken Selects are available across the United States. (By the way, if your local McDonald’s sells Chicken Selects, take a picture and send an email to thecompleteguidetoeverything@gmail.com so that Tim can win his $1,000 bet with Tom.)We spend a good amount of time discussing this brilliant article posted on The Awl that dreams of a McWorld in Times Square that would provide a global McDonald’s experience. You should read it immediately: http://www.theawl.com/2013/01/giant-mcdonalds-times-squareAdditionally, we start off with some snow talk, debating the difference between a Snowmageddon and a Snowpocalypse while decrying the shoddy treatment of local TV weathermen whenever a B-list celebrity drops by.This episode is brought to you by MailChimp, a great service that we actually use for our newsletters. Check it out at mailchimp.com.
19/04/131h 3m

McDonalds

This week Tom receives more mail from the local cemetery and has a run-in with a conspiracy theorist on the subway, leading to a frank discussion about the Illuminati and immortality. Also Tim explains how he doesn't like people who love science, but wouldn't mind donating his body to it as long as he can make sure it isn't used to scare children after he's dead. On the subject of McDonalds the guys discuss promotional menus, "eating" a milkshake, Grilled Onion Chedder burgers, Fish McBites, McRib, Shamrock Shake, the origins of the McRib, Hulu burgers and Tim's run in with his McDonalds employee crush from 15 years ago. Before they wrap up they also take a moment to solve a problem with a woman who doesn't want her boyfriend asking her parents to marry her.
19/04/131h 6m

Super Bowl 2013

The BIG GAME is next week, and we're spending every waking moment preparing for it. After some initial confusion regarding the Super Bowl vs. Big Game Hunting, we talk about various foods found at Superbowl parties, Domino's Pizza foray into different types of food, the merits of having a party every Sunday evening, why Superman can't play in the Super Bowl, why Batman is a bad detective and debate whether or not an NFL player should be allowed to get a free pass to Disneyworld if it's possible that he was involved in a violent crime. We also announce the details of our upcoming tour in UK and Ireland and prepare to be shipwrecked on the way there. If you want more details on our tour, check out www.tcgte.com/tour. In a new installment of Tim and Tom Solve Your Problems, we tackle a question from a listener who is ashamed of his job working for a charity. This week's episode is brought to you by MailChimp. Check out their awesome service for free at mailchimp.com.
19/04/131h 15m

CES Wrapup 2013

This week we recap the 2013 CES! Learn all about the latest gadgets and gizmos, as well as an old second rate Spencer's Gifts-style store in the local mall called Gadgets and Gizmos. Before the tech talk Tim goes over some of his favorite dangerous car bits and Tom gets a flu shot from a somewhat shady Chinatown doctor. Once the tech talkin' begins we go through The Verge's best of CES 2013 list and discuss this year's monstrous 4K TVs, convertible laptops, the Fitbit Flex, Oculus Rift virtual reality glasses, the Pebble smartwatch, Qualcomm's disastrous keynote presentation, Audi's self-driving cars and Microsoft's IllumiRoom technology which might just find itself in the Xbox 720. This week's sponsor is Mailchimp. Check out their awesome service for free atMailchimp.com and sign up for our Mailchimp-powered mailing list at TCGTE.com/mailing-list.
19/04/131h 14m

The Flu

Everyone's getting the flu. Don't leave your home. If you must go out into the world, don't shake any hands or talk to anyone who isn't wearing a surgical mask. And for Pete's sake, don't kiss anyone on the mouth until at least April. Luckily Tim and Tom have managed to avoid getting sick so far. This week we discuss the flu epidemic, getting a flu shot (including Tim's experience with a bewitching pharmacist and an unruly customer) and telling your doctor to shut up.  We also resurrect the segment "A Particular Type of A**hole You Didn't Know Existed Until The New York Times Pointed Them Out To You" and disagree about who the titular a**hole is in this situation. And in a new installment of "Tim and Tom Solve Your Problems" we suspect the young lady seeking our advice is not being completely honest with us.
19/04/131h 6m

College Urban Legends

This week's episode is the first installment of our new series of Urban Legends themed episodes (which will appear monthly, or until we forget about them). This week we're talking about college. Are sorority houses illegal under some states' brothel laws? Do you get straight A's if your roommate commits suicide? Did some nerd win a car for reading the small print in a textbook? Do you really get 200 points on the SAT for spelling your name correctly? Tim and Tom get to the bottom of these questions and more, with the help of the extremely informative website snoops.biz. Also, we discuss mistakes we made on New Year's Eve and somehow get on the topic of Kindergarten Cop. In a new Tim and Tom Solve Your Problems, we help out a smart dude with a dumb co-worker. (There are Go-Karts involved.)
19/04/131h 10m

The Movies of 2012

This week Tim has had enough of Christmas and would like you all to stop even though Christmas ended nearly a week ago. Also Tom becomes a member of a museum and feels pretty smug about it. In this episode the guys discuss the movies of 2012, including Sleepwalk with Me, Moonrise Kingdom, The Dark Knight Rises, The Avengers, Underworld, Red Tails, Chronicle, Ghost Rider, Wanderlust, A Thousand Words, 21 Jump Street, The Hunger Games, Cabin in the Woods, Dark Shadows, The Dictator, Battleship, Men in Black 3 and Life of Pi. It is important to note that neither Tim nor Tom have seen the majority of the movies discussed. Episode sponsored by Audible.com. Get a free audiobook by signing up for a free trial at tcgte.com/audible.
19/04/131h 5m

2012 - The Year In Entertainment

2012 was a crazy year in entertainment, what with all of those wacky celebrities getting into hilarious or tragic scrapes, that we decided to recap the year's biggest stories. We talk all about Jay-Z & Beyonce, Lindsay Lohan, Hulk Hogan, Amanda Bynes, Jessica Simpson and some other folks we don't really know much about to sort out what was hot in 2012. We also discuss our mixed feelings about the lack of an apocalypse this year and how we would hope the end of the world to play out.  Oh, and we also go over Tim's twitter "feud" with none other than 80s icon Richard Marx, who listened to our episode about him and took offense to many of Tim's comments.
19/04/131h 7m
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