No Such Thing As A Fish
Award-winning podcast from the QI offices in which the writers of the hit BBC show discuss the best things they've found out this week.
Hosted by Dan Schreiber (@schreiberland) with James Harkin (@jamesharkin), Andrew Hunter Murray (@andrewhunterm), and Anna Ptaszynski (#GetAnnaOnTwitter)
Episodes
560: No Such Thing As Spanish Toes
Live from the Sydney Opera House, Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss North Korea, war games and 'breaking' news - that is, news about breakdancing.
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05/12/24•54m 16s
559: No Such Thing As Fishing In The Sea Of Tranquility
Live from Perth, Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss stars, snakes, spinoffs and selenian spirituality.
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28/11/24•53m 27s
558: No Such Thing As A Boomerang Shaped Spaceship
Live from Adelaide, Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss ants, boomerangs, cubes, and Danish editorial foibles.
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21/11/24•49m 47s
557: No Such Thing As A Sweater For Einstein
Live from Manchester, Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss bestselling books, time travel, Mexican militias and Hellenic hydrology.
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14/11/24•53m 36s
556: No Such Thing As A Ghost In Blue Jeans
Live from the Theatre Royal, Drury Lane, Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss failure, theatrics, fraud and a highly litigious member of the Trump family.
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07/11/24•54m 0s
555: No Such Thing As Catherine Of Croydon
Live from the Theatre Royal, Drury Lane, Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss cassettes, cruising, cliffs and clowns.
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31/10/24•51m 12s
554: No Such Thing As A Dragonfish At The Opticians
Live from the Cardiff Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss wax, water, Persians and perverts.
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24/10/24•55m 39s
553: No Such Thing As A Shooting Star
Live from the Gothenburg Book Festival, Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss Bruce Lee, faux geese, science facts and science fiction.
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17/10/24•50m 6s
552: No Such Thing As I Love I Love Lucy
Live from Newcastle, Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss the beach, geese, teeth and Queen Elizabeeth.
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10/10/24•48m 38s
551: No Such Thing As President Iceberg
Live from Glasgow, Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss deaf composers, daft names, presidential pigs and fabulous frogs.
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03/10/24•49m 45s
550: No Such Thing as an Ice Cream at Stonehenge
Live from Dublin, Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss banging heads, painful teeth, big stones and little men.
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26/09/24•49m 18s
549: No Such Thing As A Beaver Walking Backwards
Live from Bristol, Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss beavers, bottoms, mounties and counting teas.
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19/09/24•44m 49s
548: No Such Thing As Radioactive Jenga
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss your facts, including domes, mushrooms, hiccups and the Flying Doctors.
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12/09/24•54m 54s
547: No Such Thing As A Mystic Beluga
Live from the Edinburgh Festival, Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss raiders, radars, Wales and whales.
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05/09/24•49m 31s
546: No Such Thing As A Sausage In The Exam Hall
Live from the Underbelly in Soho, Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss cheating, repeating, a meeting and some seating.
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29/08/24•46m 6s
545: No Such Thing As Lightning At Sea
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss constant clouds, curvaceous comedians, Polish pilots and furious-sounding Finns.
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22/08/24•52m 11s
544: No Such Thing As An Accidental Stuffed Crust
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss pizza, poetry, complaining and conveying.
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15/08/24•54m 49s
543: No Such Thing As Ice Skating On Stilts
Dan, James, Anna and Johnny Knoxville discuss skateboarding, stilt walking, supersonic speed, and some seriously savage soup.
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08/08/24•56m 17s
542: No Such Thing As Darts Vader
James, Anna, Andy and Paul Sinha discuss cinematic blockbusters, celebrities going for gold, some questionable sport, and Martin Luther King's family's fortunes.
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01/08/24•56m 20s
541: No Such Thing As A Sycamore In A Silver Coat
Dan, James, Anna and Dan Snow discuss throwing shade, protecting trees, inventing fireplaces and exiling Romans.
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25/07/24•56m 2s
540: No Such Thing As The Three Gorgeous Dams
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss clippers, snippers, naval eunuchs and wasserkochers.
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18/07/24•1h
539: No Such Thing As Kimchi Pirates
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss electric guitars, hidden tracks, and why we all love a bit of Seoul.
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11/07/24•59m 12s
538: No Such Thing As A Sausage Cat
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss pink clothes, orange cats, ballot boxes and Buddhist blast offs.
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04/07/24•56m 51s
537: No Such Thing As The Notorious British Institute of Graphologists
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss squashing, scribbling, sun spots and sea snooker.
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27/06/24•55m 54s
536: No Such Thing As A Soaring Chinchilla
Live from the Nerdland Festival, Andrew, James, Dan and Lieven Scheire discuss coughing crocs, cunning computers, testing toilets, and tall tales about tails.
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20/06/24•51m 14s
535: No Such Thing As An Inside-Out Dolphin
Anna, Andrew, James and Helen Scales discuss curious cephalopods, destitute decapods, parky penguins, and munificent midlanders.
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13/06/24•1h
534: No Such Thing As The SS Enterprise
Dan, Anna, Andrew and Ali Plumb discuss cinema, spacemen, spiders and sewage.
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06/06/24•53m 56s
533: No Such Thing As The Farto Phone
James, Anna, Andy and a silent puppet of Dan Schreiber discuss Key West, D-Day, tomahawks and trouser handles.
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30/05/24•59m 20s
532: No Such Thing As 'Is It Mushroom?'
James, Anna, Andy and Dan discuss speeding pennies, presidents, peanuts and parasites.
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23/05/24•55m 12s
531: No Such Thing As A Teaspoon of Coal
James, Anna, Andy and Dan discuss speeding swallows, Swedish statues, staining glass and selling time.
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16/05/24•1h
530: No Such Thing As A Throbberthrob
James, Anna, Andy and Dan discuss YOUR facts, including donkey graffito, Zachary Quinto, Dvořák's tubas and baseball tubers.
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09/05/24•55m 30s
529: No Such Thing As A Badger Love Note
James, Anna, Andy and Dan discuss flying, canning, paging and leeching.
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02/05/24•54m 53s
528: No Such Thing As A Toilet Haiku
James, Anna, Andy and Dan discuss low lighting, deep diving, high kicks and haiku.
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25/04/24•55m 23s
527: No Such Thing As A Rum and Woke
James, Anna, Andy and Erica McAlister discuss flies, flies, flies and flies.
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18/04/24•55m 6s
526: No Such Thing As An Angry Banana
James, Anna, Andy and Alex Bell discuss Wasabi, Harriet T, an Angry Bee and NH3.
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11/04/24•53m 56s
525: No Such Thing As A Clenched Shin
Dan, James, Anna and Alex Bell discuss Porky, Hockey, Hippies and Nookie.
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04/04/24•57m 7s
524: No Such Thing As The Grand Old Dug Of Cardiff
Dan, James, Anna and Lydia Mizon discuss pregnant players, cunning companies, sinking snowballs and blistering barnacles.
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28/03/24•58m 39s
523: No Such Thing As A Dice The Size Of The Universe
Dan, James, Anna and Matt Parker discuss, Rising Sun, falling bridges, celebrity computers and tearaway trolleys.
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21/03/24•1h 1m
522: No Such Thing As Monet's Bog Cottons
Dan, James, Anna and John Lloyd discuss Orwellian liars, neolithic fires, spicy pillories and dusty lilies.
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14/03/24•58m 52s
521: No Such Thing As A Human-Sized Peanut
Dan, James, Andy and Anna discuss waging war, protesting pictures, subatomic shows and migrating moss.
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07/03/24•57m 37s
520: No Such Thing As A Prehistoric Air Fryer
Dan, James, Andy and Melanie Bracewell discuss swooping birds, shooting baskets, gaming downloads and grilling dinosaurs.
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29/02/24•54m 31s
519: No Such Thing As A Noice Computer
Dan, James, Andy and Olga Koch discuss Joni Mitchell, Joey Chestnut, Dawn Supercomputer and Archi Conjugation.
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22/02/24•1h 3m
518: No Such Thing As Andrew Marvell's Cinematic Universe
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss Trollope, tantra, chameleon die-offs and Crimean send-offs.
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15/02/24•56m 21s
517: No Such Thing As Julius Caesar's Dad Jokes
Anna, Andy, James and Dan discuss duplicating songs, repeating jokes, fugu and Waterloo.
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08/02/24•51m 49s
516: No Such Thing As Zeno's Harbour
Anna, Andy, James and Ethan Ruparelia discuss warm blankets, dry beds, and 'going down to the butts'.
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01/02/24•57m 31s
515: No Such Thing As A Reindeer Stockbroker
Anna, Andy, James and Leying discuss Bletchley teas, Thirsk MPs and sailing ships on stormy seas.
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25/01/24•1h 1m
BONUS: Drop Us A Line - January 2024
In this special bonus episode, Dan, James, Andy and Anna sift through the correspondence sent in by listeners.
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If you'd like to write in, you can email podcast@qi.com
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23/01/24•27m 7s
514: No Such Thing As A Computer Tower
Dan, Anna, Andy and James discuss mangroves, make-up, French waters and Swiss goitres.
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18/01/24•56m 45s
513: No Such Thing As Upside-Down Space Rain
Dan, Anna, Andy and Stevie Martin discuss flipped moons, reverse-shoplifting, topsy-turvy monorails and inverted rhinos.
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11/01/24•58m 52s
512: No Such Thing As A Dirty Bar Of Soap
Dan, Anna, Andy and Rhys James discuss soap, style, naps and novelists.
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04/01/24•58m 40s
511: No Such Thing As An Honest Washing Machine
In Andy's Mailbag Special, Andy, Dan, James, Anna discuss your facts, including underwater cars, over the top diving, teeth, toilets and Torquay.
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28/12/23•48m 44s
510: No Such Thing As Pumpkin Spice Moss
In a Christmas special, live from the Soho Theatre, Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss pumpkins, pancakes, sherry and gravy.
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21/12/23•52m 27s
509: No Such Thing As A Sausage Dog Helicopter
In a review of 2023, live from the Soho Theatre, Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss crocs, rocks, Berlusconi and Ivan Toney.
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14/12/23•56m 20s
508: No Such Thing As A Dragon Walk
Dan, James, Anna and Alex Bell discuss Goya, wire, dead bacteria and fax hysteria.
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07/12/23•55m 30s
507: No Such Thing As Fangtooth Boxing
Dan, James, Anna and Anne Miller discuss big eyes, big teeth, bean juice, and James Joyce.
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30/11/23•1h 1m
506: No Such Thing As Jenga Cop
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss Heads, Senna, Leas and Toes. Leas and Toes.
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23/11/23•1h 1m
505: No Such Thing As Hitchcock's 'The Worms'
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss snake bites, starfish bodies, sucking blood and a speaking building.
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16/11/23•56m 25s
504: No Such Thing As Captive Willy
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss bingeing, beeping, recording and re-introducing.
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09/11/23•1h 1m
503: No Such Thing As Meat Cute
Dan, James, Andrew and Maisie Adam discuss fizzy drinks, footy bans, evaluating meat and innovating mics.
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02/11/23•1h 1m
502: No Such Thing As The Opposite Of February
Dan, James, Andrew and David Mitchell discuss sea turtles, street music, sickly kings and sticky fingers.
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26/10/23•1h 5m
501: No Such Thing As Republican Barbie
A compilation of unheard material from Dan, James, Andrew and a whole host of guests, recorded over the summer at the Soho Theatre in London.
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19/10/23•57m 9s
500: No Such Thing As A Cougar Called Jeff
Dan, James, Andrew and Anna celebrate 500 episodes and discuss cougars, crocs, digits and David.
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12/10/23•59m 17s
499: No Such Thing As Old Testament Podcasts
Dan, James, Andrew and Lou Sanders discuss skating, shanties, flies and fishing.
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05/10/23•52m 28s
498: No Such Thing As Internal Eyebrows
Dan, James, Andrew and Hannah Fry discuss diamonds, duels and dodgy discussions.
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28/09/23•1h
497: No Such Thing As Oceans Eleven with Puffins
Dan, James, Andrew and Greg Jenner discuss why weekdays are confused, why electric cars were not all there, and why children were in Seine.
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21/09/23•51m 50s
496: No Such Thing As Viking Snooker
Dan, James, Andrew and Rachel Parris discuss parachutes, puppets and precise presidents.
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14/09/23•48m 53s
495: No Such Thing As A Peanut Hall of Fame
Dan, James, Andrew and Neil Gaiman discuss bagels, boulders, bees and boldly buttering burnt bread.
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07/09/23•54m 15s
494: No Such Thing As A Human Wind Turbine
Dan, James, Andrew and Sophie Duker discuss Barbie dolls, ladybirds, William Blake and a useful snake.
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31/08/23•52m 40s
493: No Such Thing As An X
Dan, James, Andrew and Susie Dent discuss algorithms, calculations, 'X's and 'Oh No's.
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24/08/23•52m 0s
492: No Such Thing As York Minster Crisps
Dan, James, Andrew and Richard Osman discuss heinous errors, outrageous lies, endemic theft and delicious maize-based snacks.
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17/08/23•54m 3s
491: No Such Thing As The Beurre War
Dan, James, Andrew and Ella Al-Shamahi discuss wailing whales, stock cocktails and immersible immortality.
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10/08/23•53m 8s
490: No Such Thing As Whistling At A Fact
Dan, James, Andrew and Cariad Lloyd discuss valuable wool, recycled stool, Suffragettes and PDFs.
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03/08/23•50m 31s
489: No Such Thing As A Quiet Whitsuntide
Dan, James, Andrew and Sally Phillips discuss Satan, Jason, hobbies and johnnies.
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27/07/23•49m 53s
488: No Such Thing As A Furby in Space
Dan, James, Andrew and Jamie Morton discuss water beds, water retention, Pentagon Pokemon and PMSL.
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20/07/23•54m 20s
487: No Such Thing As A Short Dalek
Dan, James, Andrew and Jenny Colgan discuss Doctor Who, Dr. Oppenheimer, detecting dogs and cotton candy.
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13/07/23•1h
486: No Such Thing As Purplue
Dan, James, Andrew and Sophie Duker discuss randy humps, landing bumps, A. Guy (a girl), and the most romantic Romantic.
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06/07/23•1h
BONUS: Drop Us A Line - June 2023
Dan, James, and Andy sift through the correspondence sent in by listeners.
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If you'd like to write in, you can email podcast@qi.com
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03/07/23•28m 7s
485: No Such Thing As Ballet On A Staircase
Dan, James, Andrew and Bec Hill discuss millipedes, spiders, odd dolls and terrifying interrogations.
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29/06/23•1h 1m
484: No Such Thing As An Exploding Janitor
Live from the Nerdland festival in Ghent, Dan, James, Andrew and Lieven Scheire discuss brooms, brains, books and Belgium.
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22/06/23•48m 27s
483: No Such Thing As Rivets On A Tombstone
Dan, James, Andrew and Ella Al-Shamahi discuss hops, hominids, Spitfires and Socotra.
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15/06/23•1h
482: No Such Thing As Parachuting Into Hollyoaks
Dan, James, Andrew and Rosie Jones discuss ziplines, olympians and chippy Yorkshiremen.
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08/06/23•56m 26s
481: No Such Thing As Taming A Plane
Dan, James, Andrew and Anne Miller discuss reckless roping, pseudo puffins, trash talk and green gables.
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01/06/23•56m 7s
480: No Such Thing As President Muffler
Dan, James, Andrew and Phil Dunster discuss thatched theatres, fake footballers and the Oval Office.
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25/05/23•55m 38s
479: No Such Thing As Fake Coal
Dan, James, Andrew and Alex discuss Swiss subduing, supermarket wrong-doing, model choo-chooing and JR Ewing.
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18/05/23•51m 52s
478: No Such Thing As An Award-Winning Gecko
Dan, James, Andrew and Sally Phillips discuss mythical beasts, hungry caterpillars, false geckos, and Super Furry Animals.
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11/05/23•1h 1m
477: No Such Thing As ShatGPT
Dan, James, Andrew and Hank Green discuss anserines, aliens, Alaska and Alexa.
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04/05/23•53m 55s
476: No Such Thing As Othello's Casio
Dan, James, Andrew and Cariad Lloyd discuss Groundhog Day, Citizen Kane, Spice World: the Movie and Groundhog Day.
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27/04/23•1h 1m
475: No Such Thing As The Three Little Pigs of Wall Street
Dan, James, Andrew and John Lloyd discuss misnamed insects, mislabelled body parts, misbehaving pigs, and Mister Bob Hope.
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20/04/23•46m 39s
474: No Such Thing As A Remote Controlled Cabbie
Dan, James, Andrew and Hannah Fry discuss navigation, colouration, lachrymation and an island nation.
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13/04/23•59m 38s
473: No Such Thing As Rice Babies
Dan, James, Andrew and Philippa Perry discuss clumsy kings, disciplining elders and Manley Hopkins.
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06/04/23•55m 16s
472: No Such Thing As A Giant Otter In H&M
Dan, James, Andrew and Athena Kugblenu discuss fast fashion, flash frying, remote repossession and terrible texts.
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30/03/23•54m 39s
471: No Such Thing As A Toin Coss
Dan, James, Andrew and Rachel Parris discuss delegating decisions, downing drinks and Desert Island Discs.
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23/03/23•1h
470: No Such Thing As A Walking Stick Full of Bagels
Dan, James, Andrew and Monica Heisey discuss fingers, holes, failed marriages and a very Canadian scandal.
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16/03/23•57m 31s
469: No Such Thing As A Rubik's Tube
Dan, James, Andrew and Lucy Porter discuss cube lube, pajama drama, a leech's home and the Cuckoo's Nest.
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09/03/23•57m 56s
468: No Such Thing As Drama-Free Pringles
Dan, James, Andrew and Sara Pascoe discuss IVF births, WB Yeats, Mr. J Pringle, and DJ Mustard.
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02/03/23•55m 7s
467: No Such Thing As Free Laundry
On Anna's final day before maternity leave, She, Dan, James and Andrew tell some salacious stories from the last 9 years and listen to some of Anna's best bits.
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23/02/23•1h 4m
466: No Such Thing As Political Moss
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss snail roads, convent gardens, political moss, and political goss. Visit nosuchthingasafish.com for news about live shows, merchandise and more episodes. Join Club Fish for ad-free episodes and exclusive bonus content at nosuchthingasafish.com/apple or nosuchthingasafish.com/patreon
16/02/23•56m 21s
465: No Such Thing As An Itching Powder Guild
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss rejections, ejections, lightbulbs and onion bulbs.
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10/02/23•58m 38s
464: No Such Thing As An Average Bucket
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss stone-throwing suffragettes, sizeable screens, simulated seasickness and scrotal scavengers.
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02/02/23•55m 0s
463: No Such Thing As An Especially Attractive Barge
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss Minion mythology, pregnancy pranks and poking parishioners.
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26/01/23•54m 2s
462: No Such Thing As A Luigi Board
Live from Up the Creek in Greenwich, Dan, James, Andy and Anna discuss ring mutts, King Tuts, reincarnation and the Restoration.
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20/01/23•53m 14s
461: No Such Thing as the Milkmaid's Tale
Dan, James, Anna and special guest Rhys Darby discuss boats, goats, Tintin's tuft and mystery moose.
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12/01/23•1h 1m
460: No Such Thing as Proust's Sausage Roll
Live from the Bloomsbury Theatre, London, Dan, James, Andy and Anna discuss Popeye, Proust, Hankies and Spankies.
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05/01/23•59m 31s
459: No Such Thing As A Bee On The Moon
Happy New Year! Live from the Up the Creek in Greenwich, Dan, James, Andy and Anna look back at 2022 with facts about Will Smith, Gareth Southgate, Jair Bolsonaro and Liz Truss (remember her?).
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29/12/22•37m 23s
458: No Such Thing As An Edam Tuba
Merry Fishmas! Live from the Bloomsbury Theatre, London; Dan, James, Andy and Anna celebrate Christmas with facts about Switzerland, meatballs and Nostradamus; as well as a special nerdy quiz.
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22/12/22•35m 8s
457: No Such Thing As An Acoustic Tram
Dan, James, Andy and Anna discuss muppet makers, soda jerks, and why Vicki McClure wasn't taken for a ride.
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16/12/22•53m 37s
456: No Such Thing As Glass in the Future
Dan, James, Andy and special guest Jamie Morton discuss Oscar records, Disney secrets, and what Rocky Flintstone was doing in the 60s.
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09/12/22•53m 11s
455: No Such Thing As A Suspicious Duffel Bag
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss chimps, caterpillars, darts and debris.
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02/12/22•56m 52s
454: No Such Thing As A Midsummer Night's Bream
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss bowler hats, Kalamazoo, gravestones and anaesthesia.
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25/11/22•57m 13s
453: No Such Thing As James Cameron's Worms
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss selfishness, Sundays, brilliant businessmen, and a blue movie.
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18/11/22•56m 42s
452: No Such Thing As Lemming Atlantis
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss Lemmings, Lightning, Lift-Off and Locking Lips.
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11/11/22•51m 37s
451: No Such Thing As Deckchair Wrestling
James, Anna, Andrew and special guest Angela Barnes discuss Goldfinger, the German poetry in-spectre, and a view to a kale.
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04/11/22•1h 3m
450: No Such Thing As A Deep Drawer
Dan, James, Anna, and Andrew discuss kissing, queuing, losing your head and losing your platoon.
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27/10/22•58m 7s
449: No Such Thing As the Blancmange Olympics
Dan, James, Anna, and Andrew discuss candy, desserts, popcorn and what's wrong with a Shirley Temple on ice.
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20/10/22•55m 33s
448: No Such Thing As Pastries in Alleyways
Live from Cardiff, Dan, James, Anna, and Andrew discuss kings, kissing, coaching and croissants.
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13/10/22•51m 45s
447: No Such Thing As A Rabbit-Cabbage Hybrid
Live from Inverness, Dan, James, Anna, and Andrew discuss clones, cardboard, car keys and deadly parrot fever.
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06/10/22•49m 0s
446: No Such Thing As A Ninja Wearing Clogs
Live from Glasgow, Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss spiders in space, chickens in clogs, and famous physicists in films.
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29/09/22•45m 29s
445: No Such Thing As Genghis Khan in Wimbledon
Live from the London Podcast Festival, Dan, James, Anna, and Andrew discuss cats, Confucianism and costly carrots.
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22/09/22•44m 53s
444: No Such Thing As Duck Bill Hickok
Live from Edinburgh, Dan, James, Anna, and Andrew discuss stopping scoundrels, squeaky sounds and a seriously suspect citation.
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15/09/22•51m 56s
443: No Such Thing As The Little Spreadsheet Loving Mermaid
Live from Aberdeen, James, Anna, Andrew and Dan discuss chimps, chickens, spreadsheets and changing sheets.
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08/09/22•53m 9s
442: No Such Thing As Borkenstein's Monster
James, Anna, Andrew and Dan discuss bugs, booze, plants and possessions.
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01/09/22•51m 10s
441: No Such Thing As Spying With Ritz Crackers
James, Anna, Andrew and Dan discuss emu eggs, exciting eclipses, musical machines and medical mishaps.
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25/08/22•56m 47s
440: No Such Thing As Death By 1000 Scallops
James, Anna, Andrew and special guest Steve Mould discuss bitterness, bricks, bivalves and boiling.
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18/08/22•53m 30s
439: No Such Thing As A Finger Fish
Dan, Anna, Andrew and James discuss Brontes, Bergs, Bugs and Big Ol' Boulders.
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11/08/22•59m 40s
438: No Such Thing As A Candyfloss Blimp
Dan, Anna, Andrew and special guest Malcolm Gladwell discuss Silicon Valley regrets, aeroplanes dangling from hooks and whether Dan should be a billionaire.
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04/08/22•59m 1s
437: No Such Thing As A Face Mite With A Laptop
Dan, James, Andy and Anna discuss mites, miles, Mayflowers and mucky movies. Visit nosuchthingasafish.com for news about live shows, merchandise and more episodes.
28/07/22•55m 37s
436: No Such Thing As An Alexa In Heaven
Dan, James, Andy and special guest Ed Yong discuss good uses for bad medicine, what hummingbirds do in a bed of roses, and why America is livin' on a prayer. Visit nosuchthingasafish.com for news about live shows, merchandise and more episodes.
22/07/22•1h 2m
435: No Such Thing As An Arm-Wrestling Chihuahua
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss huge heads, bloated batsmen, lopsided lighthouses and 'armful arm-wrestlers.
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15/07/22•54m 19s
434: No Such Thing As Robinson Two-Soe
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss Puerto Rican primates, epicurean pirates and painting princes.
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08/07/22•54m 52s
433: No Such Thing As A Golden Chicken
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss Francis Fitzgerald's fame, full-to-bursting fish, and a frankly phenomenal fruit.
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01/07/22•54m 43s
432: No Such Thing As Sexygesimal Time
Dan, Andy, Anna and special guest Bobby Seagull are discussing charts, talking clocks, and having a chit chat about Kitcatts.
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24/06/22•56m 52s
431: No Such Thing As A Vampire From Devon
Dan, James, Andrew and special guest Rachel Parris discuss piano prodigies, snow-struck skiiers, urine luck, and the Devon Dracula.
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17/06/22•49m 48s
430: No Such Thing As The Assistant Honcho
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss the letters A (for Airport Complaints), B (for Birdman Cults), C (for Crafty Caterpillars) and D (for a Dodgy Dewey).
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10/06/22•48m 54s
No Such Thing As A Royal Seal
Happy Platinum Jubilee Bank Holiday! Here's a little extra something from Dan, James, Anna and Andrew get you through the four-day weekend.
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03/06/22•33m 25s
429: No Such Thing As Newsbite
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss magnificent moustaches, mating moles and Miniscule Maltese Mothercare.
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02/06/22•52m 25s
428: No Such Thing As Free Urine In The Uber
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss surprise sedans, sustained smears, squatting ships and seldom-seen sticks.
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27/05/22•52m 0s
427: No Such Thing As A Magnetic Skateboard
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss a cupboard full of clown heads, the robot that doesn't jump over the moon and the rock and roll side of pension planning.
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20/05/22•49m 12s
426: No Such Thing As The Man-Trap Of Walford
James, Anna, Andrew and special guest Lucy Porter discuss Korean aging, Chinese quizzing, Dot Wordsworth and Dot Cotton.
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13/05/22•58m 22s
425: No Such Thing As The Ken Ages
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss the hedges of England, the river of Mississippi and the snowflake early universe.
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06/05/22•47m 18s
424: No Such Thing As An Ark For Peanuts
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss pilchard performances, banyan behemoths, thai tastes, and fun foley.
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29/04/22•55m 50s
423: No Such Thing As A Seminole Sorting Hat
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss seal sex, cricket contraptions, hard rock, and controversial colourful cafes.
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22/04/22•53m 44s
422: No Such Thing as The Long Kiss Good Brie
In our Easter Special Compilation, James, Anna, Andrew and Dan send lawbreaking emails, potentially libel the Royal Family, get a warm welcome in Dublin and are hounded out of Newcastle.
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15/04/22•41m 8s
421: No Such Thing As An Elephant On A Chessboard
James, Anna, Andrew and special guest Tim Harford discuss vital vitamins, stinging schemes, and the practice of pyrography.
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08/04/22•57m 13s
420: No Such Thing As An Actor Called Macbeth
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss paddling pachyderms, fatalistic funfairs and audacious actors.
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01/04/22•54m 12s
419: No Such Thing As SpongeBob with Worms
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss skaters' skirts, comedians coats and the worst thing you can possibly bring to the top of a tree.
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25/03/22•55m 9s
418: No Such Thing As A Pub Full of Corgis
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss Dean Martin's massive hands, Tasmania's lovely butts, and James's sexy mosquito legs.
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18/03/22•48m 43s
417: No Such Thing As A Guide Dog Called Neil
Live from Belfast, Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss e-mail, y-fronts and MRI scanners.
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11/03/22•46m 38s
416: No Such Thing As The Turin Towelette
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss bear toys, bare humans, and a museum that is barely there.
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04/03/22•48m 2s
415: No Such Thing As Tiddlywinks In The Wild West
Live from Bath, Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss top tiddlywinkers, poking pork, and bathing in Bath. Visit nosuchthingasafish.com for news about live shows, merchandise and more episodes.
25/02/22•51m 43s
414: No Such Thing As Miles Davis's Jazzercise Workouts
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss Army squads, Leggy squats, and heady squabs.
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18/02/22•42m 55s
413: No Such Thing As Squid Playing Games
Live from York, Dan, James, Andrew, & Anna discuss squids, sticks, artichokes and arty jokes. Visit nosuchthingasafish.com for news about live shows, merchandise and more episodes.
11/02/22•54m 36s
412: No Such Thing As A John Lennon Statue in Svalbard
Dan, James, Andrew, & special guest Deborah Frances-White discuss fake foxes, fake Drug habits, and fake Tina Turners. Visit nosuchthingasafish.com for news about live shows, merchandise and more episodes.
04/02/22•38m 55s
411: No Such Thing As Cristiano Ronaldo Eating Pistachios
Live from Manchester, Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss postcards, pistachios, postcards and a glamorous guillotiner. Visit nosuchthingasafish.com for news about live shows, merchandise and more episodes.
28/01/22•50m 10s
410: No Such Thing As A Cheesus Christ
Live from Newcastle, Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss dogs that escape, robbers who can't escape Detective Cumberbatch, and where best to escape the dreaded 'girlitis'.
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21/01/22•38m 32s
409: No Such Thing As Reverend Christian Book
Live from Poole, Dan, Andy, Anna and Andrew discuss tardigrades, tigers, testicle theft and trendy priests.
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14/01/22•48m 40s
408: No Such Thing As A 'Waiting For Godot' Action Figure
Live from Chesterfield, Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss monkey bashing grannies, monkey bashing Beatles, and how the number the beast can get you on the road to Armageddon.
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07/01/22•42m 45s
407: No Such Thing As An Echidna With An After Eight Mint
Happy New Year! It's the Fish Live Compilation Special! Dan, James, Anna and Andrew show why they're absolute pro podcasters, with a new bunch of outtakes and near disasters from our live shows.
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31/12/21•41m 16s
406: No Such Thing As Batman And Thrush
Live from Birmingham it's the Fish Christmas Special! Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss Christmas birds and Christmas paintings, and wish you a Randy Christmas.
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24/12/21•44m 10s
405: No Such Thing As Caviar-Flavoured Water
Live from Canterbury, Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss soup bombs, military llamas and the annual explosion of worm sperm.
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17/12/21•42m 41s
403: No Such Thing As The Buckingham Palace All-Day Breakfast
Live from Oxford, Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss the longest baseball match, the highest wedding ceremonies, the largest carpets, and the holiest trees.
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10/12/21•40m 51s
402: No Such Thing As A Pig Playing Fortnite
Live from Barnstaple, Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss smells in Southampton, screens in the sea, and some spectacularly suspicious sawing.
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03/12/21•43m 58s
401: No Such Thing As Scandalnavia
Live from Ipswich, Dan, James, Anna and Andrew ask the questions: did a plant cause the American Revolution of 1776? What the hell actually is a red panda? And who really was Cotton Eye Joe?
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26/11/21•46m 35s
400: No Such Thing As A Pope In A Helicopter
Live from the London Palladium, our 400TH SHOW (!!) Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss microwaves, Microsoft and microlights.
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19/11/21•55m 4s
399: No Such Thing As Larry Grayson's Shut That Cock
Live from Exeter, Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss a puzzle in prison, a chicken on the road, and the lone vegetable detective of the high seas.
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12/11/21•40m 28s
398: No Such Thing As An Upside-Down Upside-Down Bat
Live from Peterborough, Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss murderous midwives, Mexican mouths and motorcycling mothers-in-law.
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05/11/21•46m 40s
397: No Such Thing As Sexy Toda Milkman Time
Live from Reading, Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss Toda, Yoda and Tereshkova.
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29/10/21•42m 25s
396: No Such Thing As The Echidna Prince Charming
Live from Richmond: Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss echidna wooers, death eschewers, hailstone rescuers, and drug filled sewers.
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22/10/21•42m 5s
395: No Such Thing As A Kryptonite Drill
Live from Nottingham, Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss the lunar hammock, Titanic panic, Aussie officials and how to cook pizzles.
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15/10/21•46m 39s
394: No Such Thing As A Fourteen Humped Camel
Live from Tunbridge Wells, Dan, James, Andy and Anna discuss Canyons, Kanye, Space Invaders and Spies' Masqueraders.
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08/10/21•39m 33s
393: No Such Thing As Charlie And The Sperm Factory
Dan, James, Andy and special guest Mary Roach discuss vomiting vultures, bootleg truffles, hairy astronauts, and the seediest postcards ever sent.
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01/10/21•54m 18s
392: No Such Thing As An Ancient Persian Badger
Dan, Anna, Andy and special guest Craig Glenday of Guinness World Records discuss triple-decker tattoos, hidden codes, pre-Biblical air-con and extremely elderly balloons.
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24/09/21•56m 49s
391: No Such Thing As A Sausage Swingboat
Anna gets exasperated about Tin Tin, Dan is vindicated in a fact about camels, Andy tells the best joke you'll ever hear about the Umayyad conquest of Hispania, and James finally learns what a giraffe looks like.
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17/09/21•55m 38s
390: No Such Thing As The Chronicles of Chelmsford
Dan, Andy, Anna and Shaparak Khorsandi discuss hero adventure dogs, how to find God in the sidecar of a motorbike, and the mafia book with the world's most bizarre subplot.
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10/09/21•48m 11s
389: No Such Thing As A Semen Chest
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss the high-pitched president, inflatable shoes and likin' lichen.
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03/09/21•59m 35s
388: No Such Thing As A Danquito
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss melodious bridges, murderous dragonflies, made-up politicians and magnificent wigs.
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27/08/21•56m 11s
387: No Such Thing As The Northern Lights
Dan, James, Anna and special guest Robin Ince discuss hidden sounds, flashing lights and lots and lots of dancing.
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20/08/21•48m 14s
386: No Such Thing As Enough Bathtubs
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss flying urine, sinking floaters, Keaton and Kazakhstan.
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13/08/21•59m 38s
385: No Such Thing As Crossing the Futility Boundary
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss Albatrosses, Cheetahs, Mangles, Rocking Chairs, Dolly Parton and plenty more besides.
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06/08/21•47m 46s
384: No Such Thing As Jiminy's Cricket Shop
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss the unsexiest striptease imaginable, the Michaelangelo of fake rocks, and a mysterious ascent of Mont Blanc.
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30/07/21•51m 4s
383: No Such Thing As A Mead-Based Maasai Gameshow
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss shark exfoliators, droopy Concordes and who belongs behind a snob screen
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23/07/21•59m 5s
382: No Such Thing As A Waiter Made Of Potatoes
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss delicious dissections, tempting tatties, provocative publications and rearing rocks.
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16/07/21•55m 56s
381: No Such Thing As A Safe Toothpick
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss popular plaques, pioneering puppets, pointy picks and powerful people.
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09/07/21•48m 56s
380: No Such Thing As The Virgin Mary Toast Reunion Tour
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss 19th century dogbandittis, uncommon methods for removing a tooth, and the greatest knobheads in Science Fiction.
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02/07/21•54m 29s
379: No Such Thing As A Ping Pong Ballbag
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss fighting fire with fire, moon minerals, incontinent snakes and the weirdness of watermelons
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25/06/21•43m 47s
378: No Such Thing As A Reverse-Waterslide
James, Dan, Andy and Anna discuss forest foods, pachyderm pints and where bald eagles get their takeaways.
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18/06/21•54m 35s
377: No Such Thing As The Mole Street Journal
James, Dan, Andy and Anne discuss mole-ologers, beard-botherers, actors' special rings, and textual deviants.
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11/06/21•50m 50s
376: No Such Thing As Hamil-Son The Musical
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss polite British invasions, Lin Manuel Miranda's next big broadway hit, and what a Ptaszynski really means.
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04/06/21•48m 50s
375: No Such Thing As A Holiday On Uranus
Anna, James, Dan and Andy discuss bowling, bonging, fighting and farting.
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28/05/21•55m 2s
374: No Such Thing As Tarzan In A Waterpark
Anna, James, Dan and Andy discuss song sheets, short streams and service stations.
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21/05/21•57m 12s
373: No Such Thing As The Handshake Police
Anna, James, Dan and special guest Ella Al-Shamahi discuss unhealthy handshakes, pioneering pilots and Seattle's favourite shrink.
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14/05/21•1h
372: No Such Thing As A Dinosaur For Goldilocks
Anna, James, Andrew and Dan discuss boxes in Eastbourne and boxes of newborns.
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07/05/21•55m 25s
371: No Such Thing As A Welcome Lasagne
Anna, James, Andrew and Dan discuss Tetris, cow piss, and a leg that left the premises.
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30/04/21•53m 41s
370: No Such Thing As George Clooney In A Blackcurrant Suit
Anna, James, Andrew and special guest Athena Kugblenu discuss sexism for babies, an international coffee conflict, and a political Corrector gone mad.
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23/04/21•59m 19s
369: No Such Thing As Quartz For The Courts
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss skillful french bunnies and ancient chinese sunnies.
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16/04/21•56m 16s
368: No Such Thing As The Knipper And The Corpse
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss haemolacria, Olga Chekhova, butterflies and buttered muffins.
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09/04/21•53m 12s
367: No Such Thing As A Horse Drawn Segway
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss drugs with colourful names, a prince with a colourful grotto, and a country without colour TV.
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02/04/21•52m 47s
366: No Such Thing As Listening To Your Marmalade
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss historical blocks, indecisive baboons and who acted sly when it came to Stallone.
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26/03/21•1h 2m
365: No Such Thing As A Smart Cheetah At Harvard
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss slow cheetahs, smart cushions and why doing long charity broadcasts might be a terrible idea.
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19/03/21•50m 58s
No Such Thing As Enough Money For Comic Relief
In addition to your regularly scheduled weekly episode, here is a clip from last week's No Such Thing As A Fish 20-hour podcast, streamed live from last Friday for Comic Relief!
17/03/21•21m 39s
364: No Such Thing As Kylie Minnow
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss hungry marines, thirsty police and sleepy snooker players.
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11/03/21•54m 41s
363: No Such Thing As A Squiggly Pineapple
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss clothes pegs, pineapple burgers and a very Nortey footballer.
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05/03/21•53m 26s
362: No Such Thing As Batman and Robinette
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss where to find Randy Andy, who Neil Armstrong's quarantine cockroach was, and why you start a fake dust company.
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26/02/21•54m 27s
361: No Such Thing As The Mosquito Effect
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss how many mosquitos you can fit on to your cutlery, how to disguise yourself as street furniture, and why every diver in the world should be thankful to goats.
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19/02/21•56m 13s
360: No Such Thing As May Pole Syrup
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss Polish dragons, turkey trots and leopard dentistry.
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12/02/21•50m 2s
359: No Such Thing As A Sneaky Badger Swapsie
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss badgers, bombers, bees and books ...of the audio variety
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05/02/21•52m 36s
358: No Such Thing As The Gunfight At The Amazing Corral
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss unexploded bombs, unexpected shootouts and a very unpleasant way to go.
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29/01/21•55m 51s
357: No Such Thing As A Rapidly Deflating Walrus
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss spectacular lost films, sensational Victorian plays and orgiastic tupperware parties.
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22/01/21•57m 24s
356: No Such Thing As Potter The Great
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss double-thrones, rocking chairs and a load of old molluscs.
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15/01/21•59m 3s
355: No Such Thing As The Big Bad Virginia Woolf
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss the grammar police, termite pizza and the practical jokes of one of the great poets of our time.
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08/01/21•56m 34s
354: No Such Thing As Worrying About What Might Happen
An all-new bumper compilation of silliness with Dan, Anna, James, Andy, Jenny Ryan, Tom Scott, Rhys Derby, Alan Davies and Sandi Toksvig
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31/12/20•1h 30m
353: No Such Thing As Hans Gruber's Silent Night
Dan, Anna, James and Andy discuss crap cracker jokes, Zen monk Grinches and the dangerous world of carol singing.
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24/12/20•56m 59s
352: No Such Thing As Loki-day
Dan, Anna, James and Andy discuss a warrior who was Trieu, letters that are false, and why nobody seems to know what day it is
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18/12/20•59m 4s
351: No Such Thing As Pop Charts for Bagpipers
Dan, Anna, James and Andy discuss remote Russians, minted Madagascans and a very brazen Dane.
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11/12/20•1h
350: No Such Thing As Tickling Baseball Players
Dan, Anna, James and Alan Davies discuss people lending, perilous landing, rigid fishes and frigid dishes.
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04/12/20•57m 1s
349: No Such Thing As Tug of War for Clowns
Dan, Anna, Andrew and James discuss humidity, humility and a highly dangerous activity.
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27/11/20•53m 25s
348: No Such Thing As Infinite Toilet Paper
Dan, Anna, Andrew and James discuss burglary tools, hornet tales, and infinite tiles.
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20/11/20•52m 37s
347: No Such Thing As A Bacon Scented Sleep Mask
Dan, Anna, Andrew and James discuss prisons, escapes, chess and why you can never have too much spam.
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13/11/20•54m 13s
346: No Such Thing As An Unsexy Astronaut
Dan, Anna, Andrew and Major Tim Peake discuss an out of this world diet, the last species on Earth, and what Tom Collins has been saying behind all of your backs.
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06/11/20•1h
345: No Such Thing As A Sideways Treadmill
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss a swearing mongoose, gangster candy and the wickedest man in the world in this year's Hallowe'en special.
30/10/20•54m 58s
344: No Such Thing As The Icelandic Trampoline Corps
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss American Spooks, Indian Athletes and French Donkeys.
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23/10/20•52m 42s
343: No Such Thing As A Dolphin In An Escape Room
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss bodacious inventions, heinous nuclear errors and most triumphant costume design.
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16/10/20•44m 3s
342: No Such Thing As A Presidential Fight Club
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss the most badass members of the Roosevelt family, the legend of Barry Towncouncil, and what on Earth a not-a-bird is.
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09/10/20•55m 40s
341: No Such Thing As A May-I Sandwich
Dan, James, Anna and Rhys Darby discuss dog dramas, wacky walks, and killer Kiwis.
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02/10/20•1h 2m
340: No Such Thing As A Didgeridoo in a Bar
Dan, James, Andy and Anna discuss immobile fish, inedible sandwiches and incredible traffic jams.
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25/09/20•58m 9s
339: No Such Thing As A Penguin in a Nightclub
Anna, James, Andy and Tom Scott discuss flashing lights, measuring trees and naughty penguins
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18/09/20•56m 12s
338: No Such Thing As Carthaginian YouTube
Dan, James, Andy and Jenny Ryan discuss criminal times, baffling crimes and spurious rhymes.
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11/09/20•53m 38s
337: No Such Thing As A Triangular Rectangle
Dan, James, Andy and Anna discuss advanced spatial mathematics, linguistic philosophy and a really really big cow
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04/09/20•53m 45s
336: No Such Thing As A Delicious Emergency Salad
Dan, James, Andy and Sara Pascoe discuss DNA, 747s and TMI from a certain beetle.
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28/08/20•52m 15s
335: No Such Thing As A Cardigan For Ginger Rogers
Dan, James, Andy and Sandi Toksvig discuss Bargain Hoovers, Hidden Rivers and Ginger Rogers
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21/08/20•55m 44s
334: No Such Thing As A Babysitter's Trade Union
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss swimming, wrestling, necking, and a very unfortunate giraffe.
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14/08/20•53m 19s
333: No Such Thing As Fingerprints On The Avocados
A show of outtakes from the last four months. Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss Fingerprints, silly walks, figs, dunes and much much more.
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07/08/20•50m 58s
332: No Such Thing As An Innocent Apple
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss stickers, smartphones and a man who spent a lot of time cooped up.
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31/07/20•41m 8s
331: No Such Thing As A Queen In A Fig Tree
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss the Kings of Leon, debate some Mule-y Chambers, and find out Whose Snacks are on Fire
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24/07/20•50m 8s
330: No Such Thing As An Antarctic Vindaloo
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss rocks of ages, cool treads and disco moles.
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17/07/20•53m 3s
329: No Such Thing As A Female Cereal Mascot
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss ostriches, tigers and a history's loneliest crab
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10/07/20•53m 6s
328: No Such Thing As A Romantic Lollipop
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss Summer Homes, Summer Treats and Sunday Trading
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03/07/20•53m 43s
327: No Such Thing As A SCUBA Diver In A Tree
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss Spies, Flies and Tornado Lies
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26/06/20•48m 55s
No Such Thing As The iSausage
Extra Bits Special: Dan, James, Anna & Andy discuss Sausages, Eels and Unusual Swords in a bonus episode to raise money for the Care Workers Charity. Donate here: qi.com/donate.
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22/06/20•59m 31s
326: No Such Thing As An Infortunate Occurrence
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss a sure fire way to get a million quid, the secret of word peace, and why some people are more gullible than others.
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19/06/20•51m 37s
325: No Such Thing As An Earwig Family Zoom Chat
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss medieval knights, 1001 nights, and French day trippers.
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12/06/20•49m 40s
324: No Such Thing As Mambo No. 2
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss Shameful Tunes, Moving Dunes and Historic Cartoons
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05/06/20•47m 55s
323: No Such Thing As Floating Vaseline
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss what vaseline does in water; why an owl was found in an owl; and why you need to always keep in the lines.
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29/05/20•53m 25s
322: No Such Thing As A Crown Of Willie Thornes
James, Anna, Andy & Dan discuss dizzy monks, soggy cheese and slimy sausages.
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22/05/20•54m 53s
321: No Such Thing As A Frothy Beer
James, Anna, Andy & Dan discuss chalk giants, corn circles and what the Mayans got right in 2012.
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15/05/20•48m 2s
320: No Such Thing As A Hairy Gearstick
James, Anna, Andy & Dan discuss the Greatest Showman, the Longest Limo and the World's Most Dangerous Mirrors
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08/05/20•44m 45s
319: No Such Thing As 19th Century Feudal Japanese Monopoly
James, Anna, Andy & Anne Miller discuss the Amazon, Jumanji, Loofahs and Ooya!
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01/05/20•53m 26s
318: No Such Thing As 'Of Quails and Men'
James, Anna, Andy & Historian Greg Jenner discuss forks, eggs, ants, and why American audiences can be a little too Kean.
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24/04/20•51m 57s
317: No Such Thing As Panic Buying Frankincense
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss innovations in socks, a sure-fire way to win the lottery, and the worst place to keep your small change.
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17/04/20•55m 19s
316: No Such Thing As a Leg Made from Milk
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss Meaty Biscuits, Leather Baths and Other Strange Tails.
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10/04/20•38m 59s
315: No Such Thing As Tedious Moss
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss Plato, pizza and pliable planes.
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03/04/20•47m 51s
314: No Such Thing As A Tiny Ferris Wheel
Dan, James, Anna and Alex discuss 4-D, I.D., STDs and why we're all a little bit jealous of Jessica Alba.
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27/03/20•48m 1s
313: No Such Thing As A Dangerous Coconut
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss fruit that's expensive and dangerous; and people who got very hot and very cold.
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20/03/20•53m 28s
312: No Such Thing As Quentin Tarantino's Bambi
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss dangerous Roman toilets, what shoes were thrown at a Bush, and the love life of a Lothario turtle called Diego.
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13/03/20•46m 12s
311: No Such Thing As A Michelangel-ogram
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss a bank that was too warm, a bottle that was too full, and a nose that was just right.
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06/03/20•46m 52s
310: No Such Thing As A Mungmonger
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss Romans vs Vandals; Artists vs Artists; Door-to-Door Sales; and Bear-on-Bear action.
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28/02/20•48m 24s
309: No Such Thing As The Best Bubble
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss get-fit schemes, bubble extremes, Norma Jeane, and an olm's routine.
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21/02/20•45m 29s
308: No Such Thing As The Land Of Flying Sheep
Dan, Anne, Anna and Andrew discuss Ringo Starr's exorcism, driving with a pavlova, and the tiniest classified thing at GCHQ.
Visit nosuchthingasafish.com for news about live shows, merchandise and more episodes.
14/02/20•40m 19s
307: No Such Thing As EastEnders, The Opera
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss the never-ending opera, whether worms are carbon neutral, and how Edgar Allan Poe helped to create Scrabble.
Visit nosuchthingasafish.com for news about live shows, merchandise and more episodes.
07/02/20•43m 7s
306: No Such Thing As Heavy Snuggle-Pupping
Dan, James, Anna and John Lloyd discuss correct gambling attire, the inventor of Vaseline, and Athens' sixteen thousand secret swimming pools.
Visit nosuchthingasafish.com for news about live shows, merchandise and more episodes.
31/01/20•46m 37s
305: No Such Thing As A Sentient Jelly
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss the world's first electric cargo ship, jelly wobbliness testing Edison's near-miss with a flying badger.
Visit nosuchthingasafish.com for news about live shows, merchandise and more episodes.
24/01/20•39m 8s
304: No Such Thing As A Phantasmic Foot
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss parachuting beavers, why hotdogs are called hotdogs, and how your emails are warming the planet.
Visit nosuchthingasafish.com for news about live shows, merchandise and more episodes.
17/01/20•48m 28s
303: No Such Thing As Suckling's Column
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss 11th century rental eels, Nelson's lesser-known brother, and how to break into Alcatraz.
Visit nosuchthingasafish.com for news about live shows, merchandise and more episodes.
10/01/20•51m 11s
302: No Such Thing As A Hedgehog Circus
Happy New Year! Enjoy a bumper compilation of deleted bits from 2019 - all the facts, flubs and terrible terrible puns that somehow didn't make the edit.
Visit nosuchthingasafish.com for news about live shows, merchandise and more episodes.
03/01/20•1h 21m
Audiobook Of The Year 2019 Preview
A clip from the audiobook version of the latest Book Of The Year instalment - buy it now from audible.com!
Visit nosuchthingasafish.com for news about live shows, merchandise and more episodes.
27/12/19•29m 32s
301: No Such Thing As The Queen's Christmas Burlesque
Merry Fishmas! Live from Birmingham, Dan, James Anna and Andrew discuss the earliest known pornography, Mariah Carey's Christmas tree, and how a poodle saved the Queen's speech.
Visit nosuchthingasafish.com for news about live shows, merchandise and more episodes.
25/12/19•48m 1s
300: No Such Thing As Swimming In The Sky
Live at the Heinz Oberhummer Award ceremony in Vienna, Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss edible sleds, the first attempt at laser eye surgery, and our shithole universe.
Visit nosuchthingasafish.com for news about live shows, merchandise and more episodes.
20/12/19•58m 56s
299: No Such Thing As A Conscientious Brunette
Live from Washington D.C., Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss the goats that guard Reagan's library, poppy field crop circles, and which Apollo moon landing was faked.
Visit nosuchthingasafish.com for news about live shows, merchandise and more episodes.
13/12/19•52m 49s
298: No Such Thing As An Emotional Support Amoeba
Live from New York, Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss Hornigold the pirate, support animals for other animals, and why the French can't decide on what to call a pencil.
06/12/19•46m 5s
297: No Such Thing As A Shrimp Conga
Live from New York, Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss the loudest birds on earth, the astronaut who ate shrimp cocktail 48 times in a row, and who really gave us all syphilis.
Visit nosuchthingasafish.com for news about live shows, merchandise and more episodes.
29/11/19•39m 11s
296: No Such Thing As A Glowing Ballet Dancer
Live from Philadelphia, Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss crash test moose, radioactive slippers, and the multi-presidential inventor of chewing gum.
Visit nosuchthingasafish.com for news about live shows, merchandise and more episodes.
22/11/19•42m 59s
295: No Such Thing As A 200m Baguette
Live from Boston, Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss Bastard baguettes Saddam Hussein's campaign song, and the first ever criminal to be put in Boston's stocks.
Visit nosuchthingasafish.com for news about live shows, merchandise and more episodes.
15/11/19•42m 32s
294: No Such Thing As A 15-Hour Working Week
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss hand-drawn stockings, raccoon-damaged temples, and the doomsday aircraft destroyed by a single bird.
Visit nosuchthingasafish.com for news about live shows, merchandise and more episodes.
08/11/19•53m 25s
293: No Such Thing As A Sexy Ceiling Fan
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss prehistoric sippy-cups, Rasputin's litigious assassins, and the coolest ever publicity stunt.
Visit nosuchthingasafish.com for news about live shows, merchandise and more episodes.
01/11/19•52m 18s
292: No Such Thing as a Blatant Plug for the Book of the Year 2019
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss four facts taken from The Book Of The Year 2019, including Greta Thunberg's adventurous middle name, the polling station with only one voter, and the worst way to dispose of a speeding ticket.
The Book Of The Year 2019 is out now!
Amazon:https://www.amazon.co.uk/Book-Year-2019-Such-Thing/dp/1786332019
Apple Books: https://books.apple.com/gb/book/the-book-of-the-year-2019/id1462378633
Visit nosuchthingasafish.com for news about live shows, merchandise and more episodes.
24/10/19•51m 58s
291: No Such Thing As A Quintruple-Cooked Chip
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss marrying chips, geese-rearing astronauts and the restaurant with tables in two different countries.
18/10/19•53m 35s
290: No Such Thing As A Winter Fax Machine
Alex, James, Anna and Andrew discuss Tolstoy's hat-wearing habits, nuclear-powered icebreakers (literal, not conversational) and how to hack a fax from the moon.
11/10/19•55m 46s
289: No Such Thing As A Horse Called Brian
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss leaping maggots, the point of motion sickness and why you shouldn't put on too much red lipstick.
Visit nosuchthingasafish.com for news about live shows, merchandise and more episodes.
04/10/19•45m 41s
288: No Such Thing As An Elephant In The Airport
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss elephantine super-sniffing, Thomas Jefferson's version of the Bible, and André the Giant's all-night bender.
Visit nosuchthingasafish.com for news about live shows, merchandise and more episodes.
27/09/19•48m 16s
287: No Such Thing As Pets In Heaven
Live from Antwerp, Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss diamond vacuums, North Korean app stores, and what happens when you give an elephant a gold enema.
Visit nosuchthingasafish.com for news about live shows, merchandise and more episodes.
20/09/19•39m 57s
286: No Such Thing As A Banana With Wifi
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss the invention of ball pits, a fisherman's unluckiest fruit, and how the internet was nearly called The Information Mine.
Visit nosuchthingasafish.com for news about live shows, merchandise and more episodes.
13/09/19•36m 34s
285: No Such Thing As Giving Birth Up A Climbing Wall
Dan, James, Andrew and Anna discuss special mud for baseball, why YouTube was invented, and Brazilian caesarian section parties.
Visit nosuchthingasafish.com for news about live shows, merchandise and more episodes.
06/09/19•49m 26s
284: No Such Thing As Salty Yeti Bones
Live from Paris, Dan, James, Andrew and Anna discuss odour-analysing t-shirts, New York under meteor attack, and self-pricking porcupines.
Visit nosuchthingasafish.com for news about live shows, merchandise and more episodes.
30/08/19•38m 48s
283: No Such Thing As A Lost Shadow
Live from Geneva, Dan, James Anna and Andrew discuss selling shadows, exploding aphids and the emerging blimp driving industry.
Visit nosuchthingasafish.com for news about live shows, merchandise and more episodes.
23/08/19•38m 26s
282: No Such Thing As A Bored Shrew
Live from Copenhagen, Dan, James, Andrew and Anna discuss Bjorn Borg's karate-tennis instructor, singing teachers for canaries, and what happens when a shrew gets brain-freeze.
16/08/19•42m 2s
281: No Such Thing As A Chatty Cow
Live from Amsterdam, Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss how to clean warship guns, the anti-Valentine's march, and interviewing a cow.
09/08/19•38m 19s
280: No Such Thing As A Permanently Latvian Bear
Live from Oslo, Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss medically-induced drunkenness, how to avoid being eaten by wolves on holiday, and what happens if you go clubbing with millipedes.
02/08/19•41m 30s
279: No Such Thing As A Backflipping Doctor
Live from Berlin, Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss chicken lifeguards, carrot concrete and the most-signed birthday card in history.
26/07/19•40m 35s
278: No Such Thing As A Herring-Okapi Hybrid
Dan, James, Anna, Andy and special guest Richard Herring discuss Hitler's feet, greeting hyenas and George III in a house on fire.
19/07/19•49m 17s
277: No Such Thing As An Elephant Polo Rider In A Sombrero
Live from Stockholm, Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss Swedish cyborgs, swimming pools for horses, and self-destructing Game Of Thrones scripts.
12/07/19•39m 28s
276: No Such Thing As A Ninja With A Cat
Live from Gothenburg, Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss ninja snorkelling, Spiderman's fall from a traffic light, and waiting at a train station for 120 years.
05/07/19•40m 19s
275: No Such Thing As A Squashed Microbe
Live from Oxford, Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss lethal hippopotamus poo, ice cream-making warplanes, and how to avoid upsetting microbes.
28/06/19•46m 2s
274: No Such Thing As A Polite Baby
Live from Brighton, Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss Japanese musical floorboards, how much meat is in a Pepperami, and where you'll find the rudest babies.
21/06/19•43m 20s
273: No Such Thing As A Scuba Diver Covered With Meat
Live from Sheffield, Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss urine-tasting, relocating entire buildings and the thing that's more painful to tread on than fire.
14/06/19•37m 44s
272: No Such Thing As A Non-Judgemental Herring
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss the world's most fashionable accountant, disapproval-based herring migration, and the invention of veganism.
07/06/19•44m 5s
271: No Such Thing As A Safe Robot
Live from Birmingham, Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss underwater dog treadmills, hitchhiking robots, and the late, late Elizabeth Taylor.
31/05/19•37m 54s
270: No Such Thing As BIG SHERLOCK HOLMES
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss the Mona Lisa's wandering eye, coffee cups that grow on trees, and ancient Roman earlobe specialists.
24/05/19•39m 24s
269: No Such Thing As Singing The Sport
Live from Salford, Dan, James, Andrew and Anna discuss canine height restrictions, finch bite quotients, and the Manchester Of The East.
17/05/19•38m 3s
268: No Such Thing As Welsh Guinness
Live from Dublin, Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss miniature miniature trains, bees in mourning, and unholy transplants.
10/05/19•45m 33s
267: No Such Thing As Mission Impossible For Slugs
Live from Newcastle, Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss superglued frogs, how to get into an Ancient Turkish house, and the Oscar won by nobody.
03/05/19•35m 37s
266: No Such Thing As An Innocent Pisces Sign
Live from Cardiff, Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss Comic Sans engravings, nut products with no nuts, and transient jellyfish anuses.
26/04/19•39m 46s
265: No Such Thing As A Hole In The Bowl
Live from Redruth, Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss Disney-themed punishment, grandfather clocks, and George Eliot's massive right hand.
19/04/19•39m 46s
264: No Such Thing As Bikes In Space
Live from Barnstaple, Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss live scarecrows, the first ever caravan holiday, and the billionaire with only three things to say.
12/04/19•35m 18s
263: No Such Thing As Millipede Lipbalm
Live from Cambridge, Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss silk-spinning goats, the invention of the scooter, and millipede PR problems.
05/04/19•35m 37s
262: No Such Thing As A Man In A Wine Bottle
Live from the Eventim Apollo in Hammersmith, Dan, James. Anna and Andy discuss time-travelling swordfish, the actor who reviewed his own plays, and Waddington's cattle semen trading board game.
29/03/19•35m 25s
261: No Such Thing As A Chocolate Train
Live from Uffculme, Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss chocolate gramophones, licking your own forehead and Icelandic sheep dating.
22/03/19•38m 12s
260: No Such Thing As A Giant War Sausage
Live from Aberdeen, Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss the banning of sliced bread, broken turtle penises and muscly bums.Episode 260 - No Such Thing As A Giant War Sausage
15/03/19•34m 5s
259: No Such Thing As Flyagra
Live from Glasgow, Dan, James, Andrew and Anna discuss fly dating, 69ing on American roadways, and predicting the future with asparagus
08/03/19•36m 30s
258: No Such Thing As A Brutally Honest Yoga Mat
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss plumbing detectives, guinea pigs in the freezer, and the Head of Cybersecurity who's never used a computer.
01/03/19•42m 44s
257: No Such Thing As A Squilkman
Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss kissing hedgehogs, the time on Saturn, and competitive ploughing.
22/02/19•35m 23s
256: No Such Thing As A Puddle Photographer
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss flirty cuttlefish, rooster beer and the best weather for starting a business.
15/02/19•39m 53s
255: No Such Thing As A Bouncy Asteroid
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss skimming meteors, snowy bacteria, and incorrectly formatted declarations of war.
08/02/19•44m 35s
254: No Such Thing As A Toilet In The Car
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss gingerbread in the toilet, the invention of wing mirrors, and silent movie bags.
01/02/19•34m 53s
253: No Such Thing As Dolphins At The United Nations
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss talking NASA dolphins, Robert Louis Stevenson's death and how any parents have a favourite child.
25/01/19•40m 11s
252: No Such Thing As The Shark Tooth Fairy
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss baby sharks, bankrupt lottery winners, and the city where the streets are paved with used toilet paper.
18/01/19•40m 34s
251: No Such Thing As An Accidental George
Anna, James, Andy and Anne discuss undercover restaurant reviewers, weightlifting cockroaches, and what to pack for a trip on the Orient Express.
11/01/19•44m 3s
250: No Such Thing As The Mysterious Chamber
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss demolishing the Great Pyramid of Giza, with the WWF logo is a panda, and psychopathic teenage angst.
04/01/19•43m 53s
249: No Such Thing As A Pint Of Wine
A compilation of the best deleted bits from the last year of Fish. Happy New Year!
28/12/18•36m 28s
Merry Christmas from Dan, James, Anna and Andy
Merry Christmas! Here's a bonus extract from the The Audiobook of The Year 2018, available to download. Visit nosuchthingasafish.com for more.
25/12/18•40m 51s
248: No Such Thing As The Shatner Bunny
Live from Union Chapel, Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss the world's oldest krill, the £20 million bed, and the Christmas decorations that go up in September.
21/12/18•44m 2s
247: No Such Thing As Footprints On The Sea
Anna, James, Andy and Ed discuss whistling oysters, Captain Cook's goat, and King Lear's happy ending.
14/12/18•41m 7s
246: No Such Thing As The Worm Revolution
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss the Royal Anagrammist, the man from M.O.U.L.D, and Darwin's publisher's not-so-helpful notes.
07/12/18•50m 1s
245: No Such Thing As The Very Sexy Caterpillar
Live from Brighton, Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss the police force made up of criminals, why mice walk so loudly, and the world's first crossword.
30/11/18•38m 24s
244: No Such Thing As A Fishman
Dan, James, Anna, Andy and special guest Stephen Fry discuss frogs with regional accents, Canada's official tagline, and streaking in museums.
23/11/18•1h 15m
243: No Such Thing As Jean-Paul Sartre's Crabs
Live from the Union Chapel in London, Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss snail backpacks, the band from space, and Alexander Graham Bell's talking dog.
16/11/18•52m 27s
242: No Such Thing As The Ancient Monty Python Dynasty
Live from York, Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss scaring moths out of the sky, Sir Walter Raleigh's improv act, and why a robot would say 'poop'.
09/11/18•54m 3s
241: No Such Thing As Tom Cruise In A Manger
Live from Nottingham, Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss the Nativity with celebrities, giraffes with asthma, and chucking hospital patients into a bush.
01/11/18•46m 39s
240: No Such Thing As An Easy Tweet
Dan, James, Anna, Andy and special guest Maxïmo Park frontman Paul Smith discuss banned bananas, earthquake-sensing belts, and the Great Lost Massive Toilet Of London.
26/10/18•53m 52s
239: No Such Thing As The Queen Maaaaaaary
Dan, Anna, Andy and Alex discuss why wombats have the best bums, how to build an extension on a cruise liner and Who Do You Think You Are?'s rejected celebrities.
19/10/18•32m 5s
238: No Such Thing As A Low Sofa
Dan, Andy, Anna and Anne discuss the world's worst poetry recital, where all the world's hazelnuts go, and the first ever advert on Channel 5.
12/10/18•34m 13s
237: No Such Thing As A Closed-Minded Tortoise
Dan, James, Andy and Anna discuss facial recognition for chickens, the whales older than Moby Dick, and the European Space Agency's rockin' sound system.
05/10/18•42m 13s
236: No Such Thing As A Brie Sculpture
Anna, James, Andy and special guest Alex Edelman discuss illegal canoe practices, the funniest poo joke in history and Henry VIII's favourite pudding.
28/09/18•45m 14s
235: No Such Thing As Trousers For Spiders
Dan, James, Anna and Alex discuss how to make spiders less scary, the oldest message in a bottle, and unusual features of the Mastermind chair.
21/09/18•39m 3s
234: No Such Thing As The Lemur Police
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss earwax grubs, armadillo sex and selfies with sunflowers.
14/09/18•46m 6s
233: No Such Thing As A Sexy Question Mark
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss Beefeaters' birthdays, Roman ice and metal umlauts.
07/09/18•48m 14s
232: No Such Thing As A Seven Foot Bond
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss spiders with eyeliner, biblical teeth gnashing, and the sumo wrestler with silicone in his scalp.
31/08/18•34m 59s
231: No Such Thing As A 24-Minute Podcast
Dan, James, Anna and Alex discuss the first ever stripper to jump out of a cake, the Queen of Sweden's business cards, and why holding your breath underwater is cheating.
24/08/18•24m 3s
230: No Such Thing As Tinder For Sloths
Live from the Wilderness Festival, Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss how the Macarena could save your life, the secret penis code in the Bayeux Tapestry, and the one thing more painful than childbirth (for sloths).
17/08/18•36m 14s
229: No Such Thing As The Great Modesto
Dan, James, Andy and Alex discuss gold in the sewers, Robert Burn's homemade ink, and why Sweden's highest point isn't any more.
10/08/18•37m 21s
228: No Such Thing As Seatbelts On Your Sofa
Not live and not from Bristol, Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss indoor hot air balloon shows, McBaseball and what you'll find inside a giraffe's armpit.
03/08/18•33m 6s
227: No Such Thing As A More Ambitious Crossover Event In History
Live (partly at least) from the Wellington Opera House, Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss how to birth a lamb, the most niche Netflix categories, and Elton John's travel arrangements.
27/07/18•49m 5s
226: No Such Thing As A Turtle Painting The Ceiling
Live from Auckland, Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss painting pants on portraits, why Moscow's politicians don't kiss each other, and how often men really think about sex.
20/07/18•46m 15s
225: No Such Thing As An Interesting Riddle
Live from the Sydney Opera House, Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss BBC stock orgies, being buried with a chicken and why you might cycle the Olympic marathon.
13/07/18•45m 25s
224: No Such Thing As Mixed-Species Martial Arts
Live from Brisbane, Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss spider wrestling, policemen dressed as statues, and Ozzy Osbourne's no-so-last tour.
06/07/18•44m 9s
223: No Such Thing As A Worthless Doorstop
Live from Melbourne, Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss death by meteorite, the Manhatt-ant and the downhill history of the slinky.
29/06/18•40m 56s
222: No Such Thing As A Warmongering Pigeon
Live from Melbourne, Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss superloud fish sex, taxiing to a war zone and why these facts probably aren't true.
22/06/18•41m 32s
221: No Such Thing As A Fully Carpeted Country
Dan, James, Anna, Andy and special guest Alan Davies discuss the street value of football sticker albums, anti-diving shin pads and instructional chat-up pamphlets for Argentinian footballers.
14/06/18•30m 56s
220: No Such Thing As A Million Dots
Anna, James, Andy and other James discuss bouliganism, flying on Titan, and tiny, tiny wasps.Episode 220 - No Such Thing As A Million Dots
08/06/18•46m 11s
219: No Such Thing As Jeremiah Wingdings
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss cosmetic surgery for Fish, how to get the edge in the Tour de France, and competitive typesetting.
01/06/18•44m 52s
218: No Such Thing As Tennis On The Moon
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss cavemen living on the moon, Victorian reaction times, and the mystery of The Mystery Of Edwin Drood.
25/05/18•53m 8s
217: No Such Thing As A Trapezium-Shaped Hankie
Live from Liverpool, Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss bob.com, how to eat an avocado, and what the Ancient Greeks used for toilet paper.
18/05/18•36m 22s
216: No Such Thing As A Lobster War
Live from Perth, Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss the most annoying man in history, the regretful inventor of the Australian labradoodle, and how lobsters nearly started a war.
11/05/18•35m 38s
215: No Such Thing As A Chihuahua Dog Sled Team
Live from Dublin, Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss the monumental conception of Victor Hugo, when North Korea is the safest place to be, and why you should bring 600 pairs of shoes to a dog sled race.
04/05/18•44m 50s
214: No Such Thing As A Criminal In A Fabulous Hat
Dan, James, Andy and special guest Original Elf Molly Oldfield discuss blue whale birthing, ceramic pillows and how to cast for a police line-up.
27/04/18•36m 41s
213: No Such Thing As Panda Gladiators
Live from Reading, Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss the world's first waterskier, Harvard for pandas, and the the record-holding mat holder called Matt Hand.
20/04/18•45m 4s
212: No Such Thing As A Hipster Pharaoh
Live from Belfast, Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss smuggling pasta, the Queen's tri-annual review and the designer chickens of Silicon Valley.
13/04/18•44m 9s
211: No Such Thing As A Photograph Of A River
Live from Edinburgh, Dan, James Anna and Andy discuss dinner party etiquette for 5-year-olds, ugly American shoes and divorcées falling down the stairs.
06/04/18•47m 31s
210: No Such Thing As A Sheep's Bedside Table
Live from Leeds, Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss sheep in a lift, the cocktail-endorsing pope, and why the RAF have banned Tunnocks Teacakes.
30/03/18•37m 35s
209: No Such Thing As A Sexy Black Hole
Live from Glasgow, Dan, James Anna and Andy discuss denim arson, and why 1p on the ground isn't worth anything.
23/03/18•41m 35s
208: No Such Thing As A Female Egg Thief
Live from Oxford, Dan, James Anna and Andy discuss the man with an egg stuck in his mouth, Lost Wife posters and Edward VII's driving-drink.
23/03/18•36m 25s
207: No Such Thing As Harry Potter And The Great Overreaction
Live from Brighton, Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss suspended babies, computer-generated sweet nothings, and the man who waters his house every day.
09/03/18•38m 30s
206: No Such Thing As A Pig In Court
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss Victorian fern mania, why stripes are a fashion crime and ice golf championships.
02/03/18•41m 21s
205: No Such Thing As The Number Six
Andy, James, Anna and Alex discuss ski lift thefts, the world's largest wine cellar and what would happen if all the bacteria disappeared in the world.
23/02/18•48m 48s
204: No Such Thing As A Mean Butterfly
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss the Great Maple Syrup Robbery, a musical Russian invasion and the great Greek god Doris.
16/02/18•41m 3s
203: No Such Thing As A Muscular Butterfly
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss the secret Matrix sushi recipes, why our skin doesn't leak and butterfly sperm trickery.
09/02/18•38m 56s
202: No Such Thing As A Deadly Birthday Cake
Live from Coventry, Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss trousers for horses, swimming the Atlantic, and why the inventor of basketball was so bad at teaching it.
02/02/18•43m 11s
201: No Such Thing As Lobsters At The Lobster Festival
Live from Dunstable, Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss King Ferdinand's Orient Express phobia, the giant magnet roaming Glastonbury and Foyle's unorthodox method of wartime shop defence.
26/01/18•50m 36s
200: No Such Thing As A Jigsaw For The Queen
Live from Birmingham, Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss the squatting Queen impersonator, misplace nuclear launch codes, and the statue in Belgium commemorating Peter the Great's sick.
19/01/18•51m 33s
199: No Such Thing As An Heroic Fire-Goat
Live from Leicester, Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss meerkats' inside-out bottoms, California's imprisoned firefighters, and the risk of finding a golf ball in your crisps.
12/01/18•38m 30s
198: No Such Thing As Cleopatra Movie Trivia
Live from Up The Creek In Greenwich, Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss the dead author under the bed, the first ever sports bra, and Poopy the Ambassador.
06/01/18•47m 54s
No Such Thing As Wasted Material 2017
All the outtakes and deleted bits from Fish 2017. Happy In-between-Christmas-and-New-Year-bit!
29/12/17•1h 19m
Merry Fishmas!
A special Christmas Day extract from the audiobook version of The Book Of The Year.
25/12/17•38m 22s
197: No Such Thing As Eurovision For Christmas Trees
A special Christmas episode with Dan, James, Anna and Andy, live from Up The Creek in Greenwich
22/12/17•36m 30s
196: No Such Thing As Faking The Magic Dream
Live from Wimbledon, Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss what makes flamingos pink, Cape Canaveral's dialling code, and the secret dream that lets you keep bees in the mountains.
15/12/17•36m 16s
195: No Such Thing As A Hummingbird With A Greggs Steak Bake
Live from Manchester, Dan, James, Anna And Andy discuss how much Coke a human-sized hummingbird would drink, the world's first rollercoaster, and American grocery bag-packing competitions.
08/12/17•35m 29s
194: No Such Thing As An Orange Crocodile
Live from Nottingham, Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss green robins, Lenin’s unexpected accent and the Nottingham cheese riots.
01/12/17•35m 2s
193: No Such Thing As Death By Conga
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss testifying in court through a window, the ant nests made of ants, and book the size of postage stamps.
25/11/17•43m 59s
192: No Such Thing As A Restaurant Menu For Hats
Live from Cardiff, Dan, James Anna and Andy discuss listening to the radio with your hat on, the useless mating call of the pumpkin toadlet, and salmon-shaped mountains.
17/11/17•41m 8s
191: No Such Thing As A Cannibal Squirrel
Live from Bath, Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss Calvin Coolidge's robotic horse, the inventor of email, and the language it's easiest to speak while drunk.
10/11/17•44m 0s
190: No Such Thing As A Magic Oven For Chimps
Live from Newcastle, Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss British boomerangs, primate rock-paper-scissors, and why the Catalans are so anti-cat.
03/11/17•37m 47s
189: No Such Thing As A Meringue-Utan
Live from the Cheltenham Literature Festival, Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss the Queen's nickname, the man beaten in a marathon by a tumble dryer, and the anus that is Making America Great Again.
01/11/17•33m 30s
188: No Such Thing As A Mouth-Propelled Grenade Launcher
Live from Newcastle, Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss Mo Farah's only Guinness World Record, what's inside a Kit Kat, and how hamsters arrived in the UK.
27/10/17•35m 57s
187: No Such Thing As An Ant On Its Gap Year
Andy, James, Anna and Alex discuss how to get ants drunk, the stolen cities in China, and The Sound Of Julie Andrews Being Blown Over By A Helicopter.
20/10/17•40m 51s
186: No Such Thing As Russian Hacking in the Cockroach Election
Anna, James, Andy and Alice discuss portable bridges, sneeze-based votes, and why you can't detect magnets with your mind.
13/10/17•30m 48s
185: No Such Thing As Scottish Snow
Andy, Anna, James and special guest Cariad Lloyd discuss Unity Mitford's BFFs, how planes (don't) cure deafness, and why you shouldn't eat Scottish show.
06/10/17•45m 18s
184: No Such Thing As Dinosaur Diaries
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss snakes that eat snakes, mathematical street performers, and the celebrity most likely to give you a virus.
29/09/17•39m 41s
183: No Such Thing As A Bouncy Theatre
Dan, James, Andy and Alex discuss how to drive a submarine, Gainsborough's 6-foot-long paintbrushes, and where 1% of all the world's wood goes.
22/09/17•32m 11s
182: No Such Thing As An Auction For Auction School
Dan, Anna, Andy and special guest Jason Hazeley discuss the British Lawnmover Museum, questionnaires for narcissists, how Christie's auctioneers get over their nerves.
15/09/17•32m 0s
181: No Such Thing As A Shark Vending Machine
Dan, Anna, Andy and Alex discuss Spielberg's Great White Turd, maverick train carriages and how bird always know when they're in Aberdeen.
08/09/17•35m 2s
180: No Such Thing As Playing Snake On A Plane
Dan, James, Anna and Anne discuss Hitler's Beatles cameo, how lobsters fly, and the most surprising place to find John Goodman.
01/09/17•32m 15s
179: No Such Thing As Stare-Boxing
Dan, James, Anna and Alex discuss mail-order portraits, the first ever Encyclopaedia Britannica, and the country with only five star hotels.
25/08/17•31m 46s
178: No Such Thing As A Cup Full Of Nessie
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss your amazing expanding liver, the land of ex-presidents, and scientists disguised as mooses...or is that meese?
18/08/17•41m 28s
177: No Such Thing As A Barking Spy
Live from the Wilderness Festival, Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss the invention of crowd barriers, bombs that lecture their victims, and Volkswagen's biggest product [hint: it's not cars].
11/08/17•41m 47s
176: No Such Thing As A Communist Caterpillar
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss vomiting caterpillars, quarantined chocolate, and Russian news that's literally stored in the cloud.
04/08/17•39m 15s
175: No Such Thing As A Rice Krispie With Feelings
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss expert plastic sushi artists, the world's first bendy straws, and how fake dog noses help detect bombs.
28/07/17•45m 29s
174: No Such Thing As A Manta Ray
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss competitive tongue injuring, the popemobile for hire and Bogotan traffic mimes.
21/07/17•43m 42s
173: No Such Thing As Symphony For Sizzurp In D Minor
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss weather-forecasting rainbows, Mexico's artistic tax policy and the mandatory Big Book of Tennis Rules.
14/07/17•43m 17s
172: No Such Thing As A Cat-a-Cops Cartoon
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss the police force for dead people, Indonesia's KFC CDs and Chinese mistress-dispellers.
07/07/17•50m 32s
171: No Such Thing As A Half-Ape Vampire
Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss the man behind human chess, Agatha Christie's untranslatable book and deceitful camemberts.
30/06/17•38m 45s
170: No Such Thing As A Love Potion For A Vole
Anna, James, Andy and Alex discuss stinking ice, smart seeds and the world's greatest fly swatters.
23/06/17•42m 30s
169: No Such Thing As Constantly Awake Beauty
Anna, James, Andy and Alex discuss synchronised blinking, the ants the size of foxes, and nocturnal apple-counting robots.
16/06/17•39m 41s