Moving from Conflict to Cooperation - with Alyson Schafer

We're in the middle of a revolution in parenting.

It's clear to see that in the last twenty-plus years, parenting styles have radically changed. Gone is the view that children "should be seen and not heard," and in its place is a more kid-centric approach designed--we hope--to help our kids grow up more confident and balanced, and to allow parents to more fully enjoy the experience of raising kids.

But as with any change, there are some growing pains.

As we've moved away from a generally authoritarian approach to parenting, we've blurred some of the long-held lines in the parent-child relationship. "When am I your parent, and when am I your friend? Should I always be the parent and not the friend? How does a friend convince you to eat your dinner?" And with these lines blurred, we've introduced potential for daily conflict--both with our kids and within ourselves.

Alyson Schafer is a pro at teaching parents how to manage these conflicts and even avoid them altogether. She is Canada's leading parenting expert, and her list of accomplishments makes it easy to see why: She's the author of three books, hosted her own parenting TV show for six seasons, has appeared in dozens of online and print media, and has given presentations around the world--including TEDxKids in Brussels.

In this interview, Alyson dives into the conflicts that come up in modern parenting, giving you key tips to deal with and prevent those issues--and raise cooperative, happy kids in the process!

In This Episode, You Will Learn About: Raising cooperative kids versus simply obedient kids How to stimulate intrinsic motivation and mutual respect instead of always using external rewards to motivate your child Kids’ 4 goals when misbehaving Why we should look at misbehavior as a mistaken approach How certain types of praise might actually hurt your child’s chances for true success How to deal with back talk and bad attitudes Why family meetings are so important—and how to structure them to be successful And so much more! "Mistakes are opportunities to learn, not failures and deficiencies." "Any time [kids] can increase their sense of control, their lack of control in other areas becomes more manageable." -- Alyson Schafer

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Important Resources Alyson Schafer's website for more of her best resources Book: Honey, I Wrecked The Kids: When Yelling, Screaming, Threats, Bribes, Time-outs, Sticker Charts and Removing Privileges All Don't Work - by Alyson Schafer Book: Breaking the Good Mom Myth: Every Mom's Modern Guide to Getting Past Perfection, Regaining Sanity, and Raising Great Kids - by Alyson Schafer Book: Ain't Misbehavin': Tactics for Tantrums, Meltdowns, Bedtime Blues and Other Perfectly Normal Kid Behaviors - by Alyson Schafer Alyson's articles on Huffington Post Canada AnxietyBC.com -- Great resource for anyone with anxiety, filled with helpful articles, apps, and other resources

Music

Akashic Records – Motivation Extan - Sunshine