Top 10 Excuses For Not Going To Church

Top 10 Excuses For Not Going To Church

By God

On ‘God’s Top Ten List,’ you’ll learn all the best excuses to use when you want to skip church on Sunday and work-life balance. Mary Mags joins God to discuss a lovely review about Mary from a new abortion clinic escort. 

On ‘Human News,’ Elon Musk’s rocket’s “rapid unscheduled disassembly” inspires jokes and memes, the Sneetches Twitter analogy, Christians demand Tennessee Republican’s resignation, Lauren Boebert gets owned by drag queens, Disney spites DeSantis with an LGBTQ event at Disneyland, and the theocratic fascist gaystapo in Missouri. 

You’ll get all caught up on the goings on in Heaven on ‘Heaven News.’ Mary Mags clears the air on ‘Mary Magz Newz.’ On ‘Ask God,’ you’ll learn how Mary feels about being left out of “The Last Supper” painting, if Mary gets tired of being mixed up with Jesus’ mom, and did Mary think Jesus turning water into wine was a trick. On ‘Karaoke Battle,’ God and Mary sing rewritten lyrics to Journey’s “Don’t Stop Believing.”

And don’t skip God’s New Commandment!

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