Skip to content
Global PlayerGlobal Player
The F Plus

The F Plus

By The F Plus

Terrible things, read with enthusiasm.

Episodes

392: Fantasy Writers on Reddit

When looking for writing advice, who better to ask than the helpful Redditors at r/fantasywriting? That is a rhetorical question, don't bother answering it. This 馃憦 week 馃憦 The 馃憦 F 馃憦 Plus 馃憦 doesn't 馃憦 use 馃憦 commas 馃憦馃憦馃憦
23/09/231h 8m

391: Your Winning Lottery Numbers

The formalized lottery exists in most of the United States and lottery tickets are purchased at a rate of more than $100 billion a year, yet when it comes to the matter of actually winning the lottery, we're supposed to believe it's all random chance? Surely the people at Lottery Post know better; It's a forum where people share lottery numbers and lottery number systems, and we can confirm the numbers totally work, except for the whole "winning the lottery part", but other than that, they're great. This week, 4.
21/08/231h 21m

390: Do Not Advocate For Unsafe Play

Well, it seems we haven't explored all the ways that Reddit can encourage its own userbase to cause irrepairable harm to their own bodies and minds in the pursuit of sexual gratification, so let's continue our journey with r/estim; It's a subreddit for "Anything Erotic Electro Stimulation", and a place to watch people make their own lives worse on purpose. This week, The F Plus has some work for a very desperate notary public.
02/08/231h 12m

389: Creepy Encounters With Total Idiots

The subreddit of r/CreepyEncounters is a place where redditors post true stories of lived experiences that are disurbing, strange, paranormal, or somehow otherworldly. I mean, ostensibly. In our experience, the stories are dubious, meandering tangents of fictional self-inserts that frequently fail to meet the definition of "story". But if you were looking for a preamble of what an allyway is, you're in the right place. This week, The F Plus wanted mythological beats, but Socretes is just a man.
14/07/231h 30m

388: Confessions of a Bubble Slut

We just learned that Bubblegum Fetish is a thing, so we're going on a world tour. After learning a bit more about the fetish, we're spending a considerable amount of time with a man who needs to fulfill his very particular fetish in an Amsterdam brothel, then it's over to Girls Ask Guys before we buy some ABC gum and then finally close out with an erotic story that surprisingly has actual sex in it. This week, The F Plus gets arrested trying to smuggle Super Bubble into Schiphol.
17/06/231h 16m

387: MedBed: The Bed That Treats

This episode is all about medbeds. So what is a medbed? Well, first of all it isn't a bed, so let's just get that out of the way right now. It's possibly an MLM scheme, or maybe it's a bucket, but sometimes it's a mobile phone app that takes a picture of your bed, which may or may not prevent and cure all diseases. Do you have any questions? Great, so do we. In fact, this episode is mostly us asking questions. This week, The F Plus learns the true meaning of Technotronic's Pump Up The Jam.
11/05/231h 22m

386: No Gods, Yes Masters

I really don't know how the people of royalcello dot website toolbox dot com found each other, but they've found each other. And all of the posters here believe in a single inalienable right: The Right To Rule, or rather, to be ruled, sometimes by royalcello himself who gets very testy if you say anything unkind about Charles III. Look, none of the people featured in this episode know much (if anything) about The Monarchy, but they do know they like it, and at least one of them knows The Hapsburgs belong in Spain. This week, The F Plus wants Catherine The Great to sit on our face.
12/04/231h 28m

385: Pee Fans

This episode is about pee fans such as fannywatcher, uniloo, Wet Man J, Iron Bladderman, Greedy Needy Girl, P155wet, girlwipes, Slick Gracey, Miss Piss, wet wulf, Al Fresco, and MegaPoop Tech. I'm just writing down those usernames because I found them all very funny. This week, The F Plus learns the term for a manager who is somehow also a woman.
05/03/231h 33m

384: The Angry Apple Nerd

Self described appleist Brian Frange has some serious-assed opinions about different types of apples, and he wants to share all of them. And that's... honestly, that's entirely what this episode is about, Brian Frange's opinions about different types of apples. This week, The F Plus sees a tasty unwipe anus.
19/02/231h 31m

383: What Is The Meaning of Song?

Song lyrics are an indelible part of our collective cultural confidence, but can often be a puzzle. For all of these popular songs, what do the lyrics actually mean? Well, we're visiting SongMeanings.com to hear a bunch of bad theories explained amongst infighting and sex bragging. This week, The F Plus is with the bear, and the bear is with the bear, and the bear is with the boat (you nimno).
05/02/231h 20m

382: Good Reads for Bad Needs

Let's speak honestly for a moment: We're all intelligent, thoughtful, sexual beings, right? And as such, we desire intelligent, thoughtful, well-written pornography, don't we? I dunno, but anyway here's some crap. This week, The F Plus learns the meaning of banal anal.
31/01/231h 20m

381: Let's Pollute The Planet!

Of course, there's a lot of different ways for people to internalize their own effect on the environment, but the subjects of this episode have become super horny about it. We're starting things out on clips4sale reading the description of videos where women pollute the environment, then over to F List for some perverted pollutin' profiles, and finally closing with some Lorax/Fern Gully slashfic that probably didn't need to happen. This week, The F Plus is a maybe on canonballing.
20/12/221h 27m

380: The Gospel of Digimon

Project DigiClipse may or may not be a cult founded upon the spiritual belief in the childrens' cartoon Digimon. And it's time for us to learn more. We're starting at Facebook, but moving into several forums thru the ages to listen to brothers and sisters of the faith testify. This week, The F Plus get head from Gurlemurglemon.
18/12/221h 8m

379: Unpopular Opinions? On Reddit!?

I know, we were surprised as well. But here we are, visiting r/UnpopularOpinion and it turns out there's some bad opinions in here. We weren't gonna watch what happens, but it says "watch next". This week, The F Plus stands still and moves the goalposts around.
28/10/221h 16m

378: The Worst Creepypastas

Okay, so for this episode the plan was for us to read the worst-rated stories on Creepypasta.com, but we spent like half that time on some dude's insistence that his boner for the Venom symbiote is the cure for liberalism. This week, The F Plus vows to never turn left again.
22/10/221h 27m

377: Your Chance At Love Has Been Removed By A Moderator

Are you looking for love? Well as it happens there's a lot of people on Reddit, so that's probably a good place to start. We're going to be looking into a few different subreddits for personals ads, including r/cf4cf (childfree hardcore) r/AgeGapPersonals, r/VirginityExchange, r/MBTIDating and r/RandomActsOfBlowjob in search of available singles, and we're going to learn exactly why they're single. This week, F Plus is offering distance kink education.
05/09/221h 12m

376: The Secrets of Infinite Energy

Good news everybody! The forum members of OverUnity have solved all our energy problems. They've created perpetual motion machines, 3 million terawatt batteries, balloons which are heavier than lead and other assorted contraptions that provide much more energy than they'd ever require. Only one problem: They can't tell you any specifics, because of Google. We're spending an hour and a half solving all the world's problems, and we're getting rich besides. This week, The F Plus will sue you if you infringe our Boomer Blocker庐 patent.
22/08/221h 27m

375: Brought To You By Magic Spoon

If your chakras are all out of wack and you're in the market for new ugly jewelry, Skydin Zeal would love to be your supplier. The owner of a website with where every single word is printed in every single color (and with bevels and gradients besides) you may get lost along your way, but when you're done you'll lose weight because your flatware will physically prevent you from eating. The week, The F Plus wants one of those big pussy cars like what Joey Rembrandt paints.
14/08/221h 5m

374: This One Is Mainly About Butt Chugging

Health & wellness is a complicated issue, and so is the butthole, but fortunately this is an issue that combines both those things. This is an episode of enema recipes - from coffee to dish soap to cocaine, and all points in between, and we're going to have a whole lot of fun with this until Auntie Flo shows up. Also apparently Lemon is a boomer for the first half of this episode? Gross. This week, The F Plus takes a handful of Debbie Downers.
15/07/221h 28m

373: Private Lessons in the Cultivation of SEX FORCE

The redditors of r/SemenRetention are believers in a clandestine warfare they believe has been waged to keep down the underclass by continually robbing them of their semen. These true believers therefore are determined to maximize their personal inventory of semen... by any means necessary. This week, The F Plus summons The Aetheric Ass.
12/07/221h 8m

372: Loohan vs The Lizartarians

Loohan doesn't care much for Reptilians. Or anyone else for that matter. You see, Loohan's general worldview is... actually, really hard to suss out out. He believes in space monsters, and religious conspiracies, and some weird race/gender stuff we cut out of this episode, but he has the intellectual thruline of a streetcorner man wearing a sandwich board. It's a delight! This week, The F Plus needs to consult with The Committee.
30/06/221h 7m

371: Hopscotch Goblin

Rather than describe what's happening on The Crytpidz Wiki, I'll let the site describe itself: Cryptids are monsters... except that cryptids could actually exist! When talking about Bigfoot or the Loch Ness Monster you're talking about something that could live right on this Earth right now! On Cryptid Wiki, we document all of the possible information you can get about cryptids and determine if they're real or not. This week, The F Plus likes Utah, and that's pretty dang interesting!
23/06/221h 31m

370: I Am Hucow, And I Need To Be Milked

Hucows (a portmanteau of "human" and "cows") is a word to describe a special kind of lactation fetishist 鈥 a gender-divided community (the cows and the farmers), who are into the idea of woman as lactation machines. And sure, you assume this community is bonkers, and you're right, but there's still a number of surprises in here. This week, The F Plus wants you to punch our milk bags.. NICE!!!
11/04/221h 23m

369: Destroy Weak Men

In 1996, Diana The Valkyrie set up a website using raw HTML and her own computer in order to provide erotica for people who like the idea of strong women crushing weak men. And now, 25 years later, there's an entire library of material, plenty of it absolutely horrific... If you're new to The F Plus, just be aware this one gets pretty brutal pretty quickly. This week, Kathy Lee Hulks Out, so just like... prepare yourself emotionally for that.
07/03/221h 27m

368: Not Even Once-ler

In 2012, Dr. Seuss' widow and the Despicable Me company released a movie called The Lorax. It is entirely valueless, but that's not the point. The point is that the movie had a skinny boy who sang and Tumblr has horny girls on it and so the inevitable happened: The Once-ler Fandom. It mostly involves a character with no traits whatsoever making out with clones of himself. But also, there's a weird part? This week, The F Plus trades our panties for a half a peck of sanity.
28/02/221h 17m

367: Goodbye! Yahoo! Answers!

After over 15 years of cultivating some of the dumbest questions The Internet has ever pondered, a series of truly horrific business decisions forced Yahoo Answers to shut down permanently on May 4th of 2021. Our memorial episode may not be timely, it may not be well thought out, and it may not be informative - but in all those ways, this episode is representative of Yahoo Answers itself. This week, The F Plus is burning all our documents (but unrelated to that, Jeff had a fantastic orange)
30/01/221h 8m

366: Let's Do The Time Loaf Again

Hang on, didn't the F Plus do a Mandela Effect episode before? Well, this reality has us going to the r/MandelaEffect subreddit, before realizing that r/Retconned is even stupider and spending all our time there instead. This week, The F Plus is gonna drink Goldschl盲ger until the loaf shifts.
22/01/221h 23m

365: The Bimboification of The F Plus

Inteligence iz a u konw, relativ concept, and of absolutely kinda relativ uz. While many wudd venerate intellect and self-determination as key factorz of absolutely living a ful life, dere are otherz hu feal, like, such qualitiez are inherently unladylike. Now, dat may be concerning enugh by itself, butt it'z even more concerning when yah consider people are geting a boner fwom it. WE're spending ur evening on Tumblr and looking dwugh a absolutely considerable amunt of feederism in order to transform into bimboz. Thiz weak, Thi F Pluz believez in ya. U can do it cockbwain!
07/01/221h 18m

364: Sploshing Sploshing Sploshing! Oi Oi Oi!

The Urban Dictionary defines sploshing as 鈥渁 sexual/sensual food exchange, in which at least one person covers another person in foods of different tastes, textures, and temperatures.鈥 So with that, let's go to Shokolada's Messy Story archive and get ourselves properly gunged. This week, The F Plus opens our panties for you.
15/11/211h 16m

363: Here Come Da Advicinators

Predating some of the more well-known question and answer sites, the website Advicinators dates back all the way to 2003, and it hasn't changed a whole lot in the decades since. Teenagers will ask a question, typically about sexual health, and "columnists" will offer advice, typically unhelpful. And then at the end, we'll play a game about what site we're on. This week, The F Plus gets a real nice Fing Ring.
02/11/211h 14m

362: A Permanent Predilection

Jeroen Wagemakers has a fetish, and he's been blogging about it since 2006. You see, Jeroen likes perms, but like, a lot. A whole lot. It really cannot be overstated how much Jeroen loves perms, and I know that because he's been trying to do just that for 15 years but he doesn't seem to be nearly done. This week, The F Plus makes a joke once or twice.
16/10/211h 17m

361: Night of the Blood Sorceress

The Sorceress Cagliastro is an author, a teacher, a necromancer, a bloodwitch, a haunted doll maker, a 3D printmaker, and a relentless huckster. To that end, she has a whole lot of crap you can buy and classes you can take, as long as you promise you won't ever share anything you've learned with anyone else. It's a blood oath, I suppose. This week, The F Plus is filling your head with graveyard dirt.
08/10/211h 24m

360: All My Starchildren

Do you have alien-human hybrid children you've never met? Well it turns out that simply reading this means that you do. We know, we were surprised too. We're visiting the Hybrid Children Community - a group of people of similar class and ethnic makeup who want to tell you about their imaginary children. And then they want to share recipes. This week, The F Plus is screaming with a huge smile.
30/09/211h 26m

359: It's Time For Erotic Poetry

This episode is all poetry, and that poetry is entirely sourced from Fetlife. This week, How more intense is The F Plus' hunger, Cameron?
14/08/2150m 21s

358: Fighting Over Nothing

The Dream Fiction Wiki is a place where people work very hard to catalog, annotate and describe fake things that never happened. And while this may seem like a useless exercise, the actual determination of "which fake thing is a canonically real fake thing" is a topic that has caused a significant amount of drama in the community. This week, uhhh.... so what's this episode about?
07/08/211h 13m

357: Vintage Conspiracy Theories From 2002 Or Earlier

None of the websites we read in this episode are still online outside of archive.org, but all of them follow one basic rule: Every conspiracy theory must have been written before 50 Cent's In Da Club. In stark silence, do you hear children crying? This week, Victor finally wins an episode. Lemon's note: I'm still very much interested in an Artainment cassette. Contact me.
27/07/211h 18m

356: Dragons On Usenet

----- thoughts drift by: ----- < alt.fan.dragons is over 25 years old > < indifferent to time, immortal beings reside > < saying dumb shit with weird formatting > -- TheFPlus*
18/06/211h 6m

355: SWEATER FETISH

Rather than looking at a single website, we're going on a world tour to experience SWEATER FETISH in lots of different places: Custom-knitted skintight wool catsuits, gay sweater kindle singles, people who get off on feeling itchy, people who haven't had a woman talk to them in over two decades... it's all here, and it's all very hot. But not in that way, in the other way. Whichever way you're thinking of, it's the other way. This week, The F Plus isn't enjoyable (except for the sweater parts) if you are a straight (not gay) guy. Why do all podcast episodes have to be gay?
23/05/211h 11m

354: This One Is For My Gull Girls

The Aesthetics Wiki has devoted itself to the cataloguing of hundreds and hundreds of aesthetics and subcultures which are seemingly identical to each other. This may seem like a pointless excercise, but that's just because you're being real Grandparentcore right now, and I'm experimenting with Darkest Academia. This week, The F Plus is trying to get your attention. BLUT BLUT BLUT BLUT!
08/05/211h 40m

353: Boobs In Raingear

The people over at Rainwear Central have a fetish for rainwear. Whether it's ponchos or mackintoshes, wellingtons or sou'westers 鈥 they've got a lot of words to write, and they're all written with a British accent. Bunnybread is the only person in this episode who is able to do a British accent, but unfortunately that doesn't stop the others from trying. This week, The F Plus is fit to tit.
30/04/211h 33m

352: We're All Prisoners On A Borg Ship

For years, a Tumblr user by the name of Sylphiste was trying to turn normal brains into galaxy brains with his pontifications on conformity, pop music, feminism, hostile alien invaders, psychiatry, dragons, The Mandela Effect, and things tagged "red pill" for no good reason. This week, The F Plus is teddity tubbily Reddited. Side note: This episode was recorded on February 5th, 2021 - before the deaths of both DMX and Shock G (better known as Humpty Hump), and thus those jokes end up oddly timed. Shock G will be missed.
23/04/211h 1m

351: Hail Britannica

The Fake Countries Wikia is a place where people can catalog countries that are not real, have never been real, and have never appeared in any piece of fiction or writing before this wiki. As an excercise it's not the most fruitful, and we intended to read about a whole bunch of different countries, but pretty quickly we found our home. This week, The F Plus meets The Alley People.
26/03/211h 21m

350: The Similar Worlds Project

Similar Worlds is a website where users can share their own allegedly true life experiences in a quest for acceptance, comfort and camaraderie. Naturally, this means going off on insane rants and getting really excited about being strangled by nerd thighs. This week The F Plus sees two things, but mostly your vagina.
19/03/211h 6m

349: Erotic Stories of Mind Control

I don't know what you'd expect when visiting MC Stories Dot Com, but what you'll end up with is a minimalist website hosting over 12,000 stories of mind control being used for sexual reasons. Some of these stories are very long, but fortunately some are really weird, so let's dig in. This week, The F Plus is feeling electrahorny, so let's have sex... with each other!
11/03/211h 22m

348: Do Not Summon Beelzebub

The heavily art directed magickians over at BECOME A LIVING GOD have a number of products they'd like to sell you, and about half of those are supposed to help you get laid. There's a slut water kit, PDFs that call themselves grimoires, and there will be time for poetry. This week, The F Plus ensourcles Ally Sheedy The Character (not Ally Sheedy The Person). SPECIAL MESSAGE FROM PORTAXX: Hello again! After this episode I entered a frozen hell and saw the face of the Lord of the Flies himself. It looked like 脺. Terrified, I had to capture the moment before making my heroic escape.
03/03/211h 12m

347: That Hyperboard Over Thair

Men love to go on the internet and compare length. In this case, it's just their hair. We're going to be surfing The Information Superhighway and logging on to The Men's Long Hair Hyperboard; a community which has been supporting long hair-having men since at least 1997. It's actually kind of charming. This week, The F Plus wants you to call us to let us know when you're not posting.
26/02/211h 6m

346: How To Get Fat

There's an amazing array of food out there in the world today, and yet we're still struggling with the question 鈥淗ow can a person get fat?鈥 But, fortunately, 鈥淒octor鈥 Feeder has taken it upon himself to answer that very question... Provided you're a woman with not a whole lot of clothes on. This week, The F Plus is taking The Wall Test.
17/02/211h 12m

345: Thisepisodeis Verycrazy

Crucially, this episode is not about the television show Supernanny. It is about the Supernanny Fanon Wiki, a website with over 10,000 pages devoted to alternate universe fanfiction wherein it's the near-future, but the only cultural touchstone worth documenting is what happened in these fictional episodes of the television show Supernanny and its spinoffs. This week, The F Plus will see you at The Creepy Zoo.
07/02/211h 36m

344: Meet, Fight, Jizz.

The website MeetFighters is a social network for men who want to inflict pain on one another. This manifests in a number of different ways, plenty of them horrifc, and at least one involving President Abraham Lincoln. This week, The F Plus is gonna punch that dad dad.
31/01/211h 14m

343: Keeping Cantel Moist

Chris Cantelmo is no longer with us, but his teachings remain. He described himself as a Yale Biochemist who, at some point in his life, started taking DMT and had some profound revelations about God. And has it happens, most of those revelations are about DMT itself. This week, The F Plus has a stroke.... a stroke of genius!
22/01/211h 12m

342: Root Beer Advocates

You might have guessed, but Root Beer Review is a site that hosts reviews of different root beers. What you might not have inferred is that all of these reviews are (probably) written by the same person, and the other people on the website have opinions, not just on the root beer, but on the person reviewing the root beer as well. This week, The F Plus smells terrible like vitamins and raisins.
14/01/211h 9m

341: Lucid Dreaming For Horny Reasons

The people on r/LucidDreaming have figured two things out. 1: If they touch the top of their heads while they fall asleep they'll be able to control their own dreams. And 2: Real life sex is absolute garbage compared to dream sex. Sounds like some people with helpful advice. This week, The F Plus watches out for Wife Killer Man. He killed his wife!
07/01/211h 5m

340: Everyone Here Is On Ayahuasca

The website ayahuasca.com has a forum, and its 21,000 members are (as you might guess) fans of the psychoactive drug ayahuasca. Their conversations are quite profound as they understand both gravity and Antarctica. This week, The F Plus gets namasty.
31/12/201h 11m

339: Afterskin

The topic of male circumcision is a contentious one, but fortunely we're able to avoid all of that by simply reading the words of dullards who are doing horrific things to their own skin while complaining about their mothers. This week, The F Plus would like to remind you foreskin fetish does not make sense because the foreskin is part of a man's sex organ.
22/12/201h 5m

338: Let's Stick Crystals Up Our Vaginas

The capitalist innovators over at Chakrubs have a whole bunch of different crystals to sell you, and they know where you can cram it. From yoni eggs to yoni nunchucks, for spiritual healing, emotional welness, to get over a bad breakup, or just because you're bored - the answer was inside you the whole time. This week, The F Plus is troubled to hear a click.
14/11/201h 18m

337: Living In A Vacuum

Five lucky ridiculists from The F Plus Podcast were selected to visit the forums of VacuumLand.Org and read what they found there. You鈥檒l be happy to know that a love of vintage vacuum cleaners totally isn鈥檛 a fetish, except for the times when it is. But they鈥檝e got some pretty incredible vacuum collections that they bring to conventions, and also, eventually, it will be time for poetry. This week, The F Plus will need you to hide this in your closet for our boyfriend to smell.
02/10/201h 15m

336: Hungry Like The Sasquatch

The website Bigfoot Eruption has a whole lot of things to say about Bigfoot. Now, Few of those things make a lot of sense, and fewer still seem to be internally consistent, but the important thing is that Cain and/or Adam and/or Satan is involved, it's a conspiracy, and it's not a bear. Pay attention to your dog. This week, The F Plus gets a lot of milage out of that poo.
25/09/201h 7m

klap: Friday Morning w/ Pooner & The Snizz

Just thought we'd get to today's news after a quick rundown of our court-ordered recognizance.
25/09/202m 49s

335: Planet Horny

The redditors over at r/NSFWworldbuilding are constructing intricate creative universes for one reason: To make themselves horny. This week, The F Plus can say so much with ellipses; please listen.
18/09/201h 12m

334: Doing The Robot

The forum posters over at Fembot Central are (as you might have guessed) aroused by the idea of robotic humanoid women. And they're all too happy to explore the many facets of their specific fembot obsession, despite how often or how loudly you try to protest. This week, The F Plus finds out what Joss Whedon has been up to.
08/09/201h 29m

333: Wyt & Wyttycysm & Wytchcraft

Occultist author S Rob is an incredibly prolific... typist. His work spans the mediums of advice books, spellbooks, instructional videos, essays, general self-aggrandizement and, of course, poetry. We can't cover everything he's written in a single episode, but we can just cover the general tone. Including reading his bio twice. This week, The F Plus sets sail on the SS Metathree. Correction: Boots' original reading of S Rob was at F Plus Live 5: The Finnish Incident Additional correction: Further evidence demonstates that Open University is a legitimate educational institution. Apologies for the assumption, apparently two seconds of Wikipedia is not enough to base a conclusion on in this case.
31/08/201h 25m

332: Why Don't The Females Understand Bitcoin?

Here's a simple concept: All of the material in this episode was sourced by searching BitcoinTalk for the word "female". This week, The F Plus (like women) really is a paths duck.
24/08/201h 14m

331: Everything But The Sex Stories

Since 2000, Sex Stories Dot Com has been trying to serve its titular goal: Providing the people willing to look at the website with stories of sexual activity. However, that's not all the site has. There's also essays, product reviews, self-help guides, jokes, and poetry. And that's the stuff we'll be looking at. This week, The F Plus gives you something to listen to during your 15 minute jerk break.
17/08/201h 22m

330: The Rites of Price: Amazon Edition

User reviews on Amazon drive a lot of purchasing decisions, so let's have another look at the two most important categories: Cosplay accessories and erotic gay shapeshifter novels. And then when that's done, we're playing The Rites of Price. This week, our dick plumped.
07/08/201h 27m

329: Mid Riff Movies

The forums may be gone, but the stupidity still abounds on the Internet Movie Database. Good reviews of garbage movies, bad reviews of good movies, and generally creepy undertones to everything. There's more blood, boobs, and beasts than a document from National Geography. This week, The F Plus' pokery is undoubtedly jiggery.
30/07/201h 24m

328: You Are Likely To Be Yiffed By A Grue

Fapp is a furry erotic tabletop roleplaying game. Now, credit where it's due, they own the domain balls dot horse, which is a fantastic name. However, as you're about to find out, everything they enjoy is profoundly disgusting. This week, The F Plus requests a court-ordered explungement.
23/07/201h 23m

327: Hypothetically This Is An Episode

This time around, we're not just going to one subreddit, but five different subreddits, all of which are almost identical, and all of which ask the question "What if my preposterous hypothetical was real, would you upvote me then?" And also Satan really wants to watch you suck off ya boy. This week, The F Plus is real, you family member?
16/07/2053m 9s

326: Carne Idiota

The redditors at r/ZeroCarb have a particular diet they want to share with you, and here it is: Meat. Meat at the exclusion of literally everything else. Every other comestible on the planet contains toxins, so they've found perfect health. Also they're all getting hives and incontinence and a myriad of sexual, respiratory and sleep problems, but that's probably entirely unrelated. This week, we don't mention Jordan Peterson too much, so that's nice.
11/07/201h 9m

325: Butter Business Bureau

The folks over at Bulletproof tried selling coffee with butter in it. And not only did that plan work, but their customers were willing to pay a premium for the experience. So with that lesson learned they expanded the product line: Protein bars, tinctures, vibrating platforms, books, computers with pre-installed software. These are products designed to reverse the aging process. And if that sales pitch sounds compelling to you, please give me your credit card information. This week, The F Plus puts the coconut in the fire to relieve this bellyache.
27/06/201h 39m

324: I'm Not Touching You

The Psi Wiki is an encylcopedia devoted to the art of pisonics, which takes great pains to make sure that all the information is completely accurate. So with that said, let's learn how to time travel. This week, Venmo @TheFPlus and we'll tell you what your Radionic Box does.
19/06/201h 21m

323: Do The Dishes, Charles

The Redditors on r/BadRoommates are frustrated by their roommates. Why? Well, they'd like to tell you, but that would require a familiarization with the English language far greater than any of them are capable. But the roommates have been warned! This week, The F Plus has a Sour Daddy.
20/05/201h 12m

322: The F Plus Praises!

Sourced from all over the internet, we're singing songs of praise and worship (25 of them to be exact) and we expect you to feel our love deep inside you, except not in a sex way this time. This week, The F Plus begins The Upward Spiral.
20/04/201h 24m

321: Clips 4 Bake Sale

Hey, this is a gross one! We started reading a Clips 4 Sale document, and then very quickly realized was all about food. We've got recipes, we've got cooking tips, we've got women upside down with their head in a laundry basket, really - all your staples. It's very disgusting, but also fun. And Jimmyfranks bought a whistle. This week, The F Plus can't seem to sell any of this Cookie Puss!
15/04/201h 25m

320: BBB BBB BBB Bind.

The uncredited former owner of ChemtrailsAreDemonic.org has a very straightforward message to explain to you, but if you think the URL will explain it all, you're going to be surprised on pretty much every turn here. This week, The F Plus gets super efficient at releasing our sperm whales. SPECIAL MESSAGE FROM PORTAXX: Hi! Shortly after recording this episode, I made the mistake of going outside and was sprayed by demonic chemtrails. When I came to, I realized I painted this adorable demonplane while in a possessed frenzy.
23/03/201h 16m

319: The Alkaline Trip

Alfredo Bowman (aka Dr. Sebi) made an interesting discovery about germ theory: Namely, that there is only one germ, which causes a disease called "disease", which causes mucus, which in turn causes disease. And germs. Also beets cause perpetual motion. It's all very sensible, so please buy this 拢40 tea. This week, The F Plus is giving up the moisture.
08/03/201h 23m

live8a: wikiHow The Game Show | F Plus Live 8 | Heat 1

On January 18th of 2020, The F Plus came to Portland in order to do something very stupid indeed. Sixteen players would come up to the stage, one by one, and read randomly selected content they have never seen before, in order to prove who is the motherfucking best. Achilles' Heelies - From Nightmares & Rockets (an Elon Musk fanfic) by Tesla Pike Frank West - How To Shave Your Genitals (Male) Boots Raingear - How To Get Over Your Fear Of Slenderman Victor Laszlo - How To Ignore Your Husband I'm sorry, Dad. Heat 2 | Heat 3 | Heat 4 | Final Heat
01/03/2050m 55s

live8b: wikiHow The Game Show | F Plus Live 8 | Heat 2

King Lou Fernandez - How to Survive a Freestyle Rap Battle Jack Chick - How to Become Pope Lemon - How to Report Illegal Immigrants Kumquatxop - B.A.B.E.S. (Bay Area Bug Eating Society) Don't walk on the table, Jack. Heat 1 | Heat 3 | Heat 4 | Final Heat
01/03/2043m 17s

live8c: wikiHow The Game Show | F Plus Live 8 | Heat 3

Nutshell Gulag - How to Get Rid of Demons Adam Bozarth - How to Turn the Super Bowl into Super Sex! K. Thor Jensen - How to Pretend to Have Ice Powers (for Girls) Shell Game - How to Escape a Minefield K. Thor drank his own piss. Heat 1 | Heat 2 | Heat 4 | Final Heat
01/03/2045m 52s

live8d: wikiHow The Game Show | F Plus Live 8 | Heat 4

bumpgrrl - r/creepybossta Jimmyfranks - How to Fake Your Own Death Bunnybread - How to Throw a LEGO-themed Party (for Adults) STOG - How to Vomit While Driving Hands above the waist, Bunnybread. Heat 1 | Heat 2 | Heat 3 | Final Heat
01/03/2044m 46s

live8e: wikiHow The Game Show | F Plus Live 8 | Final Heat

Achilles Heelies - Daniel Songer's Comedy Act #191 Kumquatxop - How to Win a Swordfight Shell Game - How to Live in a Dungeon Jimmyfranks - How to Cook Lasagna in the Dishwasher That's the end. Now that you're at the end, you should probably go to motherfucking.best and vote for your favorite readings. Heat 1 | Heat 2 | Heat 3 | Heat 4
01/03/2036m 33s

318: Wookiee Ookiee Ookiee

The volunteer researchers over at The Wookieepedia have quite a job in front of them: They must catalog absolutely everything that has ever existed in the Star Wars Universe, including (but not limited to) the things that Disney has labeled as canon. This week The F Plus has learned one thing about Twi'lek dancers, and it's wrong.
11/02/201h 23m

317: Sticky! Icky! Icky!

The Wiki Sticky Site may no longer be with us, but the fetish it catalogued remains with us on the internet. The people who describe themselves as "Stuck In Glue Fetishists" have a specific turn-on that you might have guessed, but it is crucially important that they describe what specific kind of glue is being used in all cases, because this is not a place for fantasy. This week, The F Plus is still stuck in the window.
30/12/191h 17m

316: My Thread Is Bigger Than Your Thread

The frequent posters over at r/WhoWouldWin are looking for hard scientific evidence of what would happen if Popeye got into a knife fight with Johnny Bravo but also if being in a high altitude environment would change the outcome. It's a dumb thing to think about, and therefore there are several hundred thousand words on the subject. This week, The F Plus is horrified to discover that Garfield has killed at least one man.
22/12/191h 20m

315: A Representative Sample Of Fetlife

Over six years ago, Montrith gave us a Fetlife document. So thanks, Montrith. This week, The F Plus is really into Snugglefuxxx.
11/12/191h 12m

314: Too Many Pumps

From the title alone, you may have some incorrect guesses at what's kept the community over at Newart.com thriving since 1996, but quickly you'll learn (as we did) that they're bound by a singular focus of pumping, inflating, and injecting their junk. And then they post pictures. Oh christ, we've seen the pictures. We see them when we close our eyes. This week, The F Plus achieves The Engored Look.
02/12/191h 10m

313: The Suicide Banquet

At The F Plus' Suicide Banquet, we're serving the following... Adam Bozarth: Roasted Lettuce, Radicchio, and Endive Achilles' Heelies: Noodle and Coffee Casserole John Toast: Tofu French Toast Portaxx: Mashed Potato Ghosts (video) Frank West: Gamer Sandwiches Squiddy: Amaretto Sour Cherry Popsicles Boots Raingear: Fenelon Poutine Bunnybread: Boob Cake Lemon: Raw Vegan Tom Kha Soup STOG: Parsnip Pancakes Nutshell Gulag: Tuna, Lemon Gelatin, and Pimento Pie Victor Laszlo: Creamy Coconut Spirulina Superfood Smoothie View Photos .button { display:inline-block; border:1px solid currentColor; padding:0.5em 1.5em; } .button:hover, .button:focus { background:#c0282d; color: white; text-decoration:none !important; }
05/11/191h 47m

312: Failure Is The Only Option

The Redditors on r/NEET self describe as "Not in Education, Employment or Training", and yes that may be a very clumsy acronym, but what they're trying to tell is that they don't work, or go to school, or even do anything like chores. This makes some of them feel special and some of them feel sad, but if they feel sad it's just the fault of women. This week, we start writing some magical realist self help fiction.
29/09/191h 3m

311: I Am The Goddess Of Salvia

While bluelight.org is not the only drugs forum on the internet, it has had about two decades to collect nearly half a million users, many of whom are very excited to share their experiences of the things they've done, thought, and said while on drugs. And most of those things are about trance albums, apparently. This week: Dilute, dilute, dilute! OK, OK, OK?
18/09/191h 26m

310: Big Gay, Little Gay

The people who frequent the unpleasantly named Coiled Fist are gay men with a specific predilection; Either they want much bigger men to be sexually rude to them, or they want to be sexually rude to much smaller men. Oh, also they hate shaving their balls. It's so time consuming! This week, we started out climbing the rope but now we're all into feet.
06/09/191h 11m

309: !sleep

r/nosleep describes itself as "a subreddit for realistic horror stories." Well, realism is a hard thing to define, and while the stories that live here are mostly poorly spelled rambling essays that strain credulity, they also cause Boots Raingear's internet to drop out for a while! 馃槺 This week, The F Plus is waterboarding clowns correctly, for once.
26/08/191h 31m

308: Is It Edible?

Originally launched in 2005, Is It Normal? is a website where people can describe their own peculiarities, and the rest of the internet can weigh in on if that is "normal" or not. For our second trip to the site, we're looking specifically at the food-related questions that people have asked the site, and learning very little in the process. This week, The F Plus is in solidarity with that Chili's waiter.
17/08/191h 27m

307: D'Deer In The Head'dlights

Ulele is a crowdfunding site for self-described makers to get money for projects they may or may not actually follow through with. How does this differ from the several dozen other websites who are doing that exact same thing? Well, first of all Ulule is French. Secondly, shut up. We've got a $300 VPN box and a jockstrap for your straw boater. This week, Boots got a new pillow.
05/08/191h 34m

306: We 鉂わ笍 Hearts

Cardiophiles are motivated by two things: An intense fetish for the functions of the human heart, and the desire to tell the entire internet that they have a fetish for the functions of the human heart. This week, The F Plus wants to sleep on the left side of the bed.
30/07/191h 20m

305: You Get Wet

There aren't a whole lot of people who visit the iSoaker family of websites, but you can't deny the passion they have in their hobby. This is an episode of meticulously documenting all the squirt guns to have ever existed, of the life-changing obsession of being super into squirt guns, and about the super cool bad ass things these full grown adults do when they're holding a squirt gun and dressed in a ninja outfit. This week, The F Plus can't decide which soaker for bear.
24/07/191h 17m

304: The Waste From The Mothership

The Ashtar Command Crew is a global organization on a mission of.... peace, maybe? It's difficult to say. We're not even sure who's on the crew. Okay, we know three things: Ashtar is love, The Paa-Tal are old, and the tall greys are taller than the short greys. Beyond that, it's open to interpretation, which is difficult when some of these beings are in the twelfth dimension. This week, The F Plus is best, the F Plus is blest.
28/05/191h 10m

303: DIY Junk Machines

For well over a decade, John James has been committed to a single mission: Disrupting the economics of the global sex industry by innovationg solutions of upcycled aftermarket parts. By that, I mean that John James makes things for him to put his dick inside of and then recommends that you do the same. It's a very squishy episode, and also there's drawings. This week, The F Plus adds bumps to our brainy zildo.
09/05/191h 7m

302: Don't Forget (I'm) The A-Hole

People need a moral arbiter in their lives, and while that's understandable, it's an odd move to trust Reddit to do it for you. And yet, r/AmITheAsshole is there, and it's handling hundreds of conflicts a day. This week, The F Plus gets disgusted by an ugly 8.
14/04/191h 28m

301: Stuffed Full Of Fantasy

A previous subject from nearly a decade ago, the website of Fantasy Feeder is still committed to its cause: Encouraging people to overeat to an absurd degree so that other people can get boners. This week, Zboatzboat!
22/03/191h 7m

300: 300 Episodes

This week, episode.
22/03/193m 48s

299: Lavender Scissors Overlord

With a couple dozen books in the Kindle store at about 300 pages apiece, Morgan Blayde's contributions to the urban fantasy genre could best be described as "relentless". His protagonist has a magical tattoo that helps him straight up murder a hundred guys in hand to hand combat, and I don't need to tell you that the female characters in his books like that very much indeed. Because sometimes you have to fight fire with hellfire, there鈥檚 episode 299 of The F Plus: Raised as a demon, armed like a gun merchant, and fueled by booze. Poorly constructed sentences are in this episode and this is that what this episode then does best.
17/03/191h 10m

298: Giving You Tingles

The topic of ASMR first caught a number of peoples' attention as a very strange looking and suddenly popular YouTube goldrush. The idea of whispering, crinkling, and providing a number of close wet sounds is very much tied into the happiness of a certain demographic who we're honestly a little concerned about. This week, The F Plus contemplates the opposite of nails on a chalkboard.
10/03/191h 21m

297: Aliens & Autism

While technical writer Michael Menkin may not be an accredited scientist, he is a man of science. One scientific field interests him in particular, and that's the field of sewing plastic bags to the insides of a leather aviator softcap in order to prevent thought-rays from hostile aliens who want to give you autism. It's a specialized field, but he's written a lot of papers on the subject. This week, The F Plus has been manipulated by the greys to find this funny, but please do not be fooled.
03/03/191h 13m

296: SWORDS!!!

The world can be a scary place, and that's why the folks at BUDK Worldwide are there, day after day, to use that fear as a tool to sell cheap worthless crap to rubes with self esteem problems. We're here for the swords, but there's a lot of categories on offer here and it's easy to get distracted. This week, The F Plus opens the box and BAM THE FREAKING BANKAI SWORD OF ICHIGOS
03/02/191h 19m

295: A Role In The Sack

Sex! Sure, it's a thing that people pretend to enjoy, but when it comes down to it, it turns out very few people seem to like the actual physical act. As in all things, it's up to The Internet to this into a fulfilling experience, and the community over at Blue Moon Roleplaying Forums is really trying their best in this regard. This week, The F Plus can't get a job in Venus City.
23/01/191h 18m

294: Steve Bannon Ruined Your Sex Robot Conference

Since 2004, the International Conference on Advances in Computer Entertainment Technology (or ACE, confusingly) has tried to explore the forefront of the intersection between humans and computers. But some changes in the steering committee and a surprise keynote speaker set forth a chain of events we simply must explore. This week, The F Plus needs you to refill your smell cannisters before we Kissinger you again.
01/01/191h 7m

293: Problematic Sex Toys

Some years ago, we covered some of the sex toys on offer at Bad Dragon. But now this is an entirely different thing. We're taking a tour of different places on the internet, all of which want to you to have sex with truly horrifying objects. This week, limited edition F Plus toys are available in chafed anus.
13/12/181h 12m

292: Stumped!

DeviantArt is a strange place with many strange people, chief among them are the titular deviants, who use the site to share and explore their own peculiar sexual predilections. And that prediliction for tonight? Amputee fetishists, and the various ways they attempt to justify their specific interest which totally isn't gross you guys I promise. There's lore! This week, The F Plus learns that we're not very popular in Earmox.
03/12/181h 17m

live7a: F Plus Live 7 | Seattle, I Guess | Part 1

It took us until our seventh F Plus Live to figure out that we could do it somewhere other than Minneapolis, and that we could do it in a theatre! We're so excited about the idea that we start things off with a musical number, before moving right in to reading crap! 2 Wrongs Don't Make A Right (A Christian Puppet Play) Ghost Stores from true-ghost-stories.com I Don't Need That Junk (A Christian Puppet Play) 7 Poems from nwanime.tv Halloween Honesty (A Christian Puppet Play) A question from Quora about Harry Potter and atheism And this is only the first half of the experience: Part 2 is here.
17/11/181h 31m

live7b: F Plus Live 7 | Seattle, I Guess | Part 2

As is tradition, we return from the break drunker than we were when we started, which becomes really obvious in Lemon's failed introductions. But we've got more crap to read, and we're going to read it! In the end, the room shares what they've learned before being visited by a special guest who has an especially smelly message of peace. But first: more poetry! 6 more poems Some questions from r/witchcraft Recycling (a Christian Puppet Play) Latawnya, the Naughty Horse, Learns to Say "No" To Drugs [a message of peace] And that's our seventh F Plus Live in the books, time for the karaoke party. Make sure you come next time!
17/11/181h 8m

291: Hi Reddit, I'm On Drugs Right Now

Some people use drugs as a method of self-discovery. Some people use Reddit as a way to discover things they don't know enough about. What happens when these two things combine? Stupid things, obviously! We're looking at a number of different subreddits, but primarily r/drugs 鈥 a place where people who are high can describe exactly how high they are, while other people leave asinine comments that get 300 upvotes. This week, itl think ibecsuse it feel jo and sjd do mand there is no back but thicscsdi i will enterbdu thef shower the aneturies whmait fir ne in there ;
22/10/181h 8m

290: Smashed Words

With half a million works in their catalog, the marketplace at the strangely named Smashwords describes itself as 鈥測our ebook. your way鈥. And, as long as 鈥測our ebook鈥 is a christian cyberpunk business-minded erotic novalla and 鈥測our way鈥 is with rambling paragraphs and keyword-stuffed sentences almost nearly as difficult to follow as this episode description, then you, my friend are in luck. It's all descriptions of ebooks this time around, folks. Settle in. This episode, The F Plus knocks at the door of a woman in an illegitimate manner (and the whole spiritual realm is on alert).
12/10/181h 19m

289: May I Propose Prepuce?

When the users over at Adult Fanfiction Dot Org aren't writing porn, they're thinking of ways to critque the ways that you, personally, write your porn. Fortunately, the site has a forum to service this need. This week, The F Plus finds the Darkwing Duck erotic fanfic.
20/09/181h 21m

288: The Rites of Price

Let's not complicate matters: There are magickal items for sale on Etsy. This episode involves us reading about those items. We square? Great. Now, enjoy our new game show. This week, The F Plus doesn't give any sharp items to Contestant Number One.
11/09/181h 18m

287: Shorn To Secrecy

We've previously taught you that being into women's hair is a thing, but it turns out that the cutting of hair is a thing as well. There's a surprising number of sites documenting this fact, and we're looking at several of them, from forums to niche porn to... well, that's really it. This week, The F Plus saves #0000 for when we're nearing orgasm.
07/09/181h 12m

twas: 'Twas The Night of Jack Chickmas

So, Cat Examiner submitted a document that was nothing but "Night Before Christmas" style poems. Then, the next day, Jack Chick got drunk and recorded the entire document, top to bottom, by himself.
15/08/1852m 44s

286: Topix Not Worth Discussing

The website Topix has been around since 2004 and in all that time has yet to figure out a good reason to exist. It's a news aggregator website with specific regional subsections, and that's the part we're focusing on in this episode. Who called the cops on drug dealers in Indiana? Who is fat and talking trash in Western Kentucky? Who cares about any of this nonsense? 2 of those 3 questions will be answered! This week, The F Plus hopes we can figure out when you come in our mouths.
07/08/181h 18m

285: Our First And Only Vore Episode

It's kind of weird that a podcast that's existed for as long as ours has, that covers the sort of material that we do, has yet to do a full-on vore episode. Just a primer in case you need it: Vore is the (predominantly furry) preoccupation with one party eating the other. It's separate from cannibalism because there's a size differential and complete disregard for physical reality which tends to make it less gross. That is, until the ambulance shows up. Once the ambulance shows up, it's a whole different thing. This week, The F Plus demands you disregard everything you've ever read.
30/07/181h 17m

284: The Politics of Bimboland

Bimboland (or BimboLand or Bimbo Land, depending) is a browser game where where players create an avatar and then level up their stats, try on clothes, and date other bimbos. Much more crucially, the Nation of Bimboland has a state called Atheistia, recognizes Christopher Hitchens' birthday as a national holiday, and has a hotly debated election coming up soon. This week, the man has the penis to satisfy the woman. The man has the penis to satisfy the woman. The man has the penis to satisfy the woman.
06/07/181h 16m

283: Nice Guys Finish Last

Milovana.com is the internet's most comprehensive resource for methods of orgasm denial. From instructional videos to concept discussions, to a genre of video game that is entirely baffling, the folks over here are united by a single belief that having an orgasm is a super bad thing to do, and they'll stop it at any costs. This week, The F Plus enters the Edge N' Ride section.
01/07/181h 21m

282: Pounded In The Butt By The Heal Beam

Over time, the sociological constructs of multiplayer video games have bled ever more into the regular lives of sexually active adults. Whether with strangers or known companions, the construct of team dynamics in a pseudoviolent situation become more commonplace and more complex. Which is, of course, very sexy. To that end, this is an episode about r/healsluts, a community of people who extrapolate video game healing into a dom/sub relationship, because of course they do. This week, The F Plus allows you to hump a pillow.
10/06/181h 8m

281: I Want That Inside Me

Biohack.me is a place for "grinders". That's a word with many definitions, but to the forum community at biohack.me, a grinder is someone who cuts themsleves in order to stick something in the wound, like a magnet or a USB stick. As you might imagine, this episode is a bit intense, and I think we came close to making one our readers pass out. So just know that going in. This week, The F Plus regrets clicking on the image links.
01/06/181h 16m

280: For A Better Slearth

Of the many Stack Exchange communities out there, the brave souls at the Worldbuilding Stack Exchange are the ones working tirelessly to solve the very dumbest of problems. Got a problem with your fictional alternate reality universe? Logistics you want to work through? Poorly drawn metaphors you want to hammer home with Hard Science? Let's waste our time together. This week, The F Plus asks what is a hat.
24/05/181h 2m

279: Masters of Bating

If you're looking for a place where old men are chattin' about jackin', you could do a lot worse than JackinChat dot com. These are men who have transcended masturbation as you might know it and recognize it as the only pure form of human expression; an expression best conveyed with sexually explicit emoticons. This week, The F Plus is going for The Full 24 Hours.
14/05/181h 8m

278: It's Trichy!

You might expect that the people over at KinkyForums are dilettantes with their sexual proclivities, but that would be a mistake. They have found what is, for them, the one perfect fetish: hair. They may disagree on hair length, hair texture, and the most desirable haircuts, but they really like hair. And, as you're about to learn, their love of hair comes at a disservice to you, personally. This week, The F Plus actually was commenting on your beautiful bobs.
03/04/181h 20m

277: My First Time (Lying On A Website)

The website MyFirstTime.com was launched in 1997 to collect stories of formative sexual experiences from its visitors. Those stories are, on average, outright fabrications written by people whose pornography habits influence their worldview. As you read the actual content of some of the more popular stories posted, you'll recognize that's a good thing. This week, The F Plus will touch your pinacolada with our hands. Whooopee!
15/03/181h 19m

276: im鈥pr眉v y蓹r lek鈥蓹鈥k盲n

For nearly 20 years, the website Urban Dictionary has been providing definitions for words and terms not covered by the Merriam-Webster dictionary. And that statement is true, so you needn't concern yourself with the cromulence of these definitions, or exactly how many fictitious sex acts need to be defined. Because this time we have a game show to play and it doesn't go smoothly. This week, The F Plus tries to figure out the difference between Lil Pump and Lil Peep.
05/03/181h 13m

275: Plane Crazy

Our world was made a lot smaller with the proliferation of airplanes. Costing hundreds of millions of dollars apiece, an airplane can provide safe and efficient travel over the Atlantic in mere hours. Planes are great! Who wouldn't want to fuck one? This week, The F Plus comes for the plane sex and stays for the Deviantart poetry.
14/02/181h 12m

274: The Computer Wrote These

In a complete departure from our usual approach, we spend this episode composing and reading text using Botnik's predictive text generators: the system used to write Harry Potter and the Portrait of What Looked Like a Large Pile of Ash. We give that a once over, and then play around with our own, including a Nicki Minaj song, Seinfeld beat poetry, and some crossover fic. This episode is a bit o' knickers.
22/01/1845m 24s

273: Flashlight Enthusiasts?

There's a couple hundred thousand members of CandlePowerForums and I don't mind telling you: those folks are really into flashlights. In what is probably our most jargon-filled episode, we're exploring the predilictions of these (exclusively) men who want to share their obsession with their wives and children, who are having none of it. This week, The F Plus is attaching the tube to our tub, and the tub to our tube.
17/01/181h 21m

272: Yiff The Gathering

Furoticon is a game similar to Magic: The Gathering, but with two important distinctions: The objective of the game is to get your furry trading cards to have sex with each other and the rules are impossible to figure out. But we're not going to let that slow us down. We're going to read these rules, and if that doesn't make us horny, we'll move onto to the forum roleplay. This week, The F Plus doesn't know what we can do, but you don't have to pay anything if you don't want the final product.
06/01/181h 23m

271: The Screenplays of ComicsNix

ComicsNix is a somewhat prolific fan fiction author who became a brief point of internet interest after writing a story where Severus Snape has sex with all the Teletubbies. But that's pass茅 now, so we're off to explore his other, more intellectual works 鈥 like the one where Batman has sex with Robocop in order to stimulate amnesia, or the complications that arose after Bella Swan summoned Satan to be her personal bodyguard. This week, The F Plus learns vengenge is a dish best served could.
21/12/171h 10m

270: A Glove Fetish Is Like A Watch Fetish But With Gloves

The World Wide Glove Fetish Association (or WWGFA, for those in the know) is a surprisingly popular forum where the predominantly British members discuss the intricacies of their fetish for gloves while a dedicated group of niche pornographers try to exploit them. This week, The F Plus needs to put on a gas mask before fingering you.
13/12/171h 18m

269: So, I Guess I'll Just Keep Holding Out For A Hero

鈥淩eal Life Superheroes鈥 is a somewhat confusing term, because it describes actual living human beings who wear costumes and write bios in the third person espousing their worldview and then... I mean, well what is 鈥渉eroism鈥 really? Is signing up for an account on the superhero forums and then getting into a flamewar with a troll account called The White Power a form of heroism? No? Okay then, how about just whatever this is.
05/12/171h 16m

268: How To Win At ASCII Art

Since 1995, GameFAQs has served as a hub for video game walkthroughs and strategies. While this is of little concern to our podcast, the fact that this website also contains a forum where video game enthusiasts can share their thoughts concerns us. Having now read the thoughts they feel are worth sharing, we're simply concerned. This week, The F Plus comes down with a bad case of Frenchman's Leg.
26/11/171h 18m

267: We Resentfully Attend

As the previous episode on this subject (#129) can attest to, the people who blog about their weddings on Offbeat Bride are really into nerdy things. And it's okay if you don't believe me on this, because they'll be more than happy to provide evidence. Much more evidence than you could ever possibly need! Do you like it when people reference other things? These people do! This week, The F Plus has a hard time picking a funniest moment, since we are comedy writers.
19/11/171h 16m

266: For No One's Consideration

The Movie Ideas Wiki is (and this is going to come as a surprise) a wiki wherein people write and catalog ideas they have for movies. But (and this may come as an even bigger surprise) the ideas posted on that wiki are crap. So Boots was thinking "Hey, what if we read these crappy ideas out loud, would that be funny?" The answer may shock you! This week, The F Plus gets challenged to a Ponytail-Off.
12/11/171h 15m

265: Only The Preambles To Recipes

Food blogging has a conundrum: People like to read and share recipes, but with there only being so many unique varients on "Sausage And Peppers", how can one particular food blog hope to cultivate its audience? Why, with 馃専zazzle馃専 of course! And words. Lots and lots of words. To that end, we're looking at one particular food blog, and specifically all the content that happens before she gets to the recipe. This week, The F Plus feels that kind of excitement that only a new tub of Crisco can bring.
05/11/171h 7m

264: Folks On Amazon Reviewing Dildos

As the world's third largest retailer, Amazon provides a marketplace with an ever expanding range of products like groceries, fine art, television shows, video game streams, and dildos. Yes of course dildos this is the internet and there's always dildos. In this episode we're looking at those brave netizens who purchased cheap sex toys on Amazon, found the products lacking, and wanted to tell the world about it. This week, The F Plus sniffs our Splooge Juice to see if it's gone bad.
18/10/171h 19m

263: Not Always On Topic

Previous subject notalwaysright.com (which titles itself as "Not Always Right - Funny & True Stores") has sections other than the one where cashiers totally own customers and then everyone applauds afterwards. In this episode, we look at Not Always Romantic, allegedly true and allgedly funny stories about couples being really adorable together. It is absolutely dreadful, so we talk about other things instead. This week, The F Plus has to leave if you say the word "period".
02/10/171h 8m

262: WikiPlow

The website Wikiporno is fun to say. In addition to that, it's a Media Wiki site where, as best as we can figure, three guys lovingly catalog all of the pornography they have seen, and they've seen a lot of a pornography! This week, we start principal photography for Butt F Plus.
26/09/171h 24m

261: Ask Reddit And You Shall Receive Reddit

With a subscribed userbase of 18 million, r/AskReddit works with a simple premise: One person asks a question, other people answer it. And that open-ended concept means means Reddit can do what it's best at: Dim your view of human worth. It is a series of threads posted in by idiots, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing. This week, The F Plus ignores the court order and visits Fun Grandma again.
16/09/171h 8m

live6a: F Plus Live 6 | Conjuring Satan | Part 1

The F Plus Live 6 is the biggest and most dangerous F Plus Live in history. After explaining the premise of the show, Lemon starts out handing out documents (or "spells"), and the audience quickly learns there's going to be a lot to wrap your head around. Bunnybread: A Story of Dirt Eating from Experience Project Achilles' Heelies: A selection of poetry from Authors Den STOG: THE P(H)ANTOM! Jack Chick: some spells and magic from Spells And Magic Boots Raingear: Reiki Healing Increases Sex Power & Orgasm This is part 1. Part 2 is here.
11/09/171h 26m

live6b: F Plus Live 6 | Conjuring Satan | Part 2

Lemon receives a phone call from his supervisor and the plan changes. More readers! We need more readers! Ironicus & Cheapskate: wikiHow (The Good vs Evil Edition) Lou Fernandez: A religious tretise on Satan and Hell by High Priestess Maxine Dietrich Kumquatxop: Blow Up The Moon (one of several usenet essays by Alexander Abian about the moon and the blowing thereup) Jimmyfranks: Human Furniture (an erotic tale on Pixies Place by Mojoel) bumpgrrl: The organized crime (which is) against men (married or/& unmarried) & marriage that which is known as feminism is legalized criminality or/and mental disorder. This is part 2. Part 3 is here.
11/09/171h 34m

live6c: F Plus Live 6 | Conjuring Satan | Part 3

For the last segment of F Plus Live 6, we consult a supercomputer and our nearest available Frank West to learn that we have not yet collected enough magicks to summon Satan. And so, we take drastic measures. Lemon & The Audience: badfic snippets J W Friedman: Read how Katy Perry's video Firework is witchcraft and how the spell is cast Adam Bozarth: The Yahoo Answers of Spanky Gazpacho Frank West: Shelia Thong Sandal Goddess by mrstanley Lemon's reading (provided by Lady Frenzy) was cut for time and then performed the next day at the karaoke afterparty. Here is a video of that.
11/09/1754m 1s

260: The Eroticism of Barney Gumble

The members of The Burp Fetish Forums share one particular prediliction which is (and this may surprise you) they all have a burp fetish. How does this fetish manifest itself, you ask? Do they like women burping or men burping? Burping in public places or burping in private areas? Slow romantic burping or torrid non-con burping? The answer to all of this is yes. They really like burping! This week, The F Plus shall not escape The Pleasure Zone.
04/09/171h 14m

259: Eat Me Drink Me

Hello, podcast listener! This is an episode about making food with bodily fluids. If you're familiar with what we do, you're probably going to like this episode a lot. If you've never heard this show before, this isn't the one to start with. Maybe try a wikiHow episode instead? This week, we're sending back this Galliano shot.
04/08/171h 14m

258: Do Not Pass Go

The creators and visionaries over at The Game Crafter have some innovative new board and card games to sell you, and they're not hampered by such trivialities as marketability, distribution, is this game any good, and am I a cretin with an axe to grind about feminism and letting that motivate every aspect about myself. Yeah, it's those kind of games. This week, Joey likes.
28/07/171h 14m

257: The Wizard Forums!

This episode on The Wizard Forums can best be described with this opening note from the document: Order within each section is approximately 鈥渓east likely to be a serial killer鈥 to 鈥渕ost likely to be a serial killer.鈥
21/07/171h 12m

256: Findumb

The financial domination subculture is one centered around the act of one person giving money to another personfor reasons which must be self evident. We're looking at the thoughts and habits of both the findoms and the paypigs, and the troubles they have getting along with each other. This week, The F Plus can't reach the end of Josh's Amazon wishlist.
08/07/171h 21m

255: Thermodynamic Martinets & Jar Jar Breasts

There's a fella on the internet by the name of saganfan1983 who has a lot of opinions to share about the issues that affect us all, like what breasts should look like or if it's okay to eat that one fish from The Phantom Menace. Oh! Also he built a spaceship. It totally works. This week, The F Plus only appears to kill a panda.
03/07/171h 12m

254: I'll Show You The Life Of The Mind

The premise of the Millenial-focused superblog Thought Catalog can be neatly summarized in its slogan All thinking is relevant. This is infuriating by itself, and not helped by the dozen or so incredibly prolific bloggers who pose the challenge "All thinking is relevant, even... this!?" This episode, The F Plus were merely freshmen.
21/06/171h 20m

253: Heal Yourself With Crystals

The proprietors of online crystal shop EnergyMuse.com inform us that 鈥渁lmost ever [sic] ancient civilization has utilized Earth energy鈥攊n the form of crystals and gems鈥攊n some way.鈥 And if you think that statement is suspect, let me ask you - do you really understand what that means? I'm pretty sure nobody does. This week, The F Plus isn't sure who stole that joke from whom.
10/06/171h 15m

252: It Is Always Cold In Chili's

The stated mission statement of Corporate Office & Headquarters is to provide visitors with customer service contact information for a variety of different corporations. However, the site allows comments, so the actual mission is that. This week, The F Plus doesn't want the update, Doug.
02/06/171h 21m

251: 鍑(鈼庣泭鈼)鍑

If you visit RantRampage.com, you'll find that the middle 390 pixels are filled with thousands of grievances filed by anonymous people on every available subject. That's followed by dozens of comments by more anonymous people who are wholly disinterested in having a productive conversation, but they sure do have a lot of things they hate. This week, keep dreaming Lesbian Losers!
26/05/171h 14m

250: WAM!!!

There's a lot of peculiar naming conventions in unusual internet fetishes, which makes the Wet And Messy fetishists very appreciated. They like it when people are wet and messy! And they have many many many words to prove it. They also have a whole lot of pictures to prove it, but we needn't concern ourselves with that. This week, The F Plus learns something about Southern Hospitality.
19/05/171h 19m

249: Ridiculist Passions

The Passions Network presents a unique value proposition: What if, instead of making one dating website, we create literally hundreds of unique (in name, but largely identical) websites, in the hopes of luring in customers with a whole bunch of super-specific niches? What would happen if we did that? The answer, it turns out, is an F Plus episode. This week, try to find who loves to suck guys. Yam!
08/05/171h 24m

248: All World Keyboard Wrestling And Roughhouse feDeration

There's a lot of enthusiastic wrestling fans in the world, and some of them dream of one day becoming professional wrestlers in their own right. In the real world that would take a lot of diligence, luck, and willingness to adopt a lifelong addiction to painkillers - but this is the internet: a place for dreamers. Enter eWrestling Encyclopedia. It's a place where ideas are more important than physical spectacle, and those ideas are things like "Another wrestler that already exists except he has my name instead of his own name". Thought provoking stuff. This week, The F Plus loves it when rappers make albums.
10/04/171h 25m

247: r/eally_sorry_about_that

Personal relationships can be difficult to manage, and there are times when people look for advice from the people closest to them. This is all well and good, but what happens when your closest friends are the anonymous chowderheads on Reddit? Well, in that case things get complicated. This week, The F Plus gives Heather some erasers.
21/03/171h 17m

246: Compose With Joystick Controllers

Cartridge Lit invites visitors to share video-game inspired poetry and prose, and a number of people have taken them up on that invitation, bringing their credentials with them. And so, what we have in this episode is a straight hour of reading meticulously written video game literature, and if it hurts you half as much as it hurt us, you're gonna need some Percocet before you hit play. This week, she's not breathing.
15/03/171h 13m

245: In Memoriam IMDb Forums

This year, IMDb made the decision to dismantle its own message boards, saying that they didn't provide enough value to the site. This of course piqued our interest and we went to see what kind of conversations could be found there. As it turns out: It was exactly the kind of conversations we'd expect to find there. This week, The F Plus meets some like-minded Burgerheads.
05/03/171h 9m

244: The Definitive Vampire Episode

If you are a regular listener to the podcast, you are probably aware of communities who self-identify as superhuman or supernatural creatures. You are also probably aware that these communities often have inconsistent and arbitrary criteria to support their claims. This is more of that, but with draculas. Have you ever dreamt of drinking blood? Can you be killed by a wooden stake through the heart or decapitation? Do you have a tan Do you say 鈥楤LAH鈥? You MIGHT be a vampire! This episode, the F Plus gets a full-ride scholarship to Vamper college.
24/02/171h 23m

243: I'm Twelve And I'm Not Lying

Real Super Powers is a site for the documentation of real, actual, legitimate, bona fide, undeniable, serious, authentic, honest, indubitable, factional, non-fictional, unaffected, veritable, perceptible, irrefutable, sincere, honest, no really I promise super powers in human beings. From there, I mean... the episode pretty much writes itself. 1This 1week, 1The 1F 1Plus 1doesn't 1have 1a 1girlfriend.
16/02/171h 19m

242: (Untitled Vaping Episode)

As vaporizers became more popular in recent years, the internet did what it does: turn an uninteresting pastime into a cultural signifier with its own jargon and infighting. And so were born "Cloud Chasers"; the men who risk friendships, wages, and their own personal safety in a never ending quest to exhale glycerine vapor in a cloud larger than someone else's. Actually, when you type it out it makes a whole lot of sense. This week, The F Plus puts a finger in Missy's Wet Box.
04/02/171h 15m

241: DRUGS!

Drugs Forum is (and this may surprise you) a forum where people talk about using drugs. That is, hundreds of thousands of people, over millions of threads, gathering to discuss the drugs they're doing, have recently done, or wish to do in the very near future. It's a vibrant community which, after many years, finally figured out the best way to go rollerblading. This week, The F Plus is your salvia...vation. (edit point)
26/01/171h 14m

240: You Need Satan More Than He Needs You

The Satanic International Network (or SIN, hyuk hyuk) bills itself as "the most popular social networking site for Satanists". While I'm not really sure how many sites they beat out for that title, what we have here is a site where various flavors of Satanist can share their feelings on religion, magick, trans rights and the New World Order and none of it will be elucidating. This week, imagine standing on the beach when 800,000 F Plus listeners walk by you.
14/01/171h 13m

239: Here Are Some More Of My Favorite Kinks

Back in 2014, we did an episode on a website called F-List, which is a site where furry perverts can share their fetishes in hopes of finding a match with similar bizarre turn-ons. But only recently did we come to find out that the site has forums, where said perverts can share opinions, which are mostly about jism. Of course, we still consulted the fetish matrix because we know how to entertain ourselves. This week, The F Plus is also turned off by World of Warcraft.
07/01/171h 26m

238: We Wuv Wawa

There's a lot of justifiable reasons for a modern human to be angry, but the mostly anonymous users of PissedConsumer.com haven't stumbled on any of them. Instead, this is a site about screaming into an aching void of your own customer service indignities, real or imaginary. This week, the women of The F Plus have some opinions, but the men are usually nice and pleasant.
03/01/171h 5m

237: Craigslist Has Forums?

While Grindr may have revolutionized the way people have anonymous gay sex, Craigslist is still a useful repository for people looking for gross furniture, seedy "modeling" jobs and unpaid gigs for exposure. But in addition to all that, they apparently have forums for some reason. In this episode, we're looking specifically at the Ettiquite forums of craigslist, to learn how we can all be better mannered participants in the human race, mainly by gaslighting our husbands. This week, The F Plus popped your pussy and toggled your tits.
28/12/1658m 53s

236: Mana From Heathens

California rich guy and man who has opinions Rob Rhinehart invented Soylent as an open source replacement to the unbearable agony of preparing and eating food. And since its inception in 2013, Soylent has given the gift of uncontrollable butt problems to an audience of Reddit-posting free thinkers. This week, The F Plus dips our Twennybar in our Schmilk. CORRECTION: Rosa Labs is headquartered in Los Angeles, not San Francisco.
17/12/161h 1m

235: This Hub Is A Mess

This episode is about HubPages.com (don't forget the asshole).
11/12/161h 19m

234: Question.com And The Morons

Of the many dubious question and answer websites that The F Plus has covered so far, Question.com is certainly one of them. This week, we're visiting The Rude Boy Planet.
29/11/161h 15m

233: Yes, But Can I Get A Man's Opinion?

Near as we can tell, the website Girls Ask Guys exists for two reasons: To provide women with insight on the innermost thoughts that drive the actions of men, and to surprise you with autoplay music and ads. Near as well can tell, the website Girls Ask Guys succeeds at one of those two things. This week, The F Plus has no patience for your dumb smart people games.
21/11/161h 22m

232: Myers' Frigs

According to the Washington Post, roughly 2 million people a year take the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator. And according to A Number I Just Made Up, 66% of those were administered by people who work in corporate HR departments, habitually doing the voice of the boss from Office Space, like she's making fun of that mentality, except she's actually saying the thing she's pretending she's mocking and it's not funny, Linda. Anyway, by having you answer a series of questions, the Myers-Briggs Quiz has been studiously designed, researched and reported to most accurately tell you which character from the Harry Potter Universe you are. And of those, the people who scored INTJ (or Severus Snape) seem to be the most excited about their results. So, here we go to Reddit to read INTJs bragging about themselves and complaining about everything else. This week, The F Plus Gangbang isn't that serious.
13/11/161h 15m

live5a: F Plus Live 5 | The Finnish Incident | Part 1

Finland's plot is unleashed! In the fifth F Plus Live show (The Finnish Incident), each reader will approach the stage to be met by Montrith's courier, who will give them material they have never seen before and must read right then and there. The results are dramatic. This episode is divided up into three segments with three readers apiece. The audio presented here is the full live show itself, we also have a YouTube playlist with all the performances and interstitial segments, plus one bonus piece. This is part one of three. We start out with STOG skipping a whole bunch of pages while he scrolls through his inventory list, and then Frank West explores a fetish that he thinks he understands by the end. Rounding out the first part is bumpgrrl who has both religious and dietary advice. A huge thank you to Mique for handling the filming of this chaotic event, as well as the editing of the video afterwards. All of the video in this show was made possible by him.
05/11/161h 16m

live5b: F Plus Live 5 | The Finnish Incident | Part 2

The agony continues! With F Plus Live undaunted by Montrith's first selections, she reaches for incompehensible dialect, hardcore dorkporn, and selections of poetry. Did we mention the nuclear tipped Angry Birds? I'm pretty sure we've mentioned the Angry Birds. This is part two of three. Jack Chick's reading contains some very questionable dialogue and Kumquatxop's reading contains questionable everything. Boots Raingear gives a variety of pieces from a single author, and Bunnybread's ad is only in the video version.
05/11/161h 25m

live5c: F Plus Live 5 | The Finnish Incident | Part 3

The explosive finale! Montrith turns the screws on the audience, but they prove resiliant. This is part three of three. And we start it out with Lemon and a piece of music journalism with a bunch of lyrics in it. After that, Achilles' Heelies learns a lot about not giving up on love. And the closer for the evening is the good sir Jimmyfranks who gives the assembled audience some practical romantic advice they can use later on that night. Four hours of content in both audio and video form, and we are delighted by the results. We hope you're happy too. See you next time.
05/11/161h 15m

231: Episode 231 The Hedgehog

The Sonic the Hedgehog franchise has a fanbase that frequently creates their own "original characters" with all of the care, originality and effort that went into the characters they're emulating (which is a compliment to nobody). At the Sonic Fan Character wiki, we're going to read about them, because the world needs to know about Sonic the Hedgehog's cousin, Jack. This week, it can be!
23/10/161h 23m

230: Huge Hoops Hard Dudes

The men of HoopFetish.com are sexually excited by hoop earrings. And it's okay if you don't trust me on this, because they've written a number of words themselves to support this claim. We're going to be taking a look at the men in this community, and perhaps learn a little bit about the exasperated women that couple with them. This is the beauty and colors of life for women and men, for both sexes.
15/10/161h 23m

229: The Space In Our Planet

Our brand new intern is in the mix while Lemon forgets which setting his microphone is supposed to be on and we explore the science behind The Concave Earth Theory! Popularized by Steven Christ, The Concave Earth theory states that [onomatopoeia where you stick your pointer finger between your lips and move it up and down while going "bwee bwee bwee bwee"], and it's got forums, so we're set. This week, GMan just won't stop lying about pushups.
08/10/161h 2m

228: United Nations of Dinguses

Nation States is a game where players can create their own idealized version of a country, ally with other nations in the game, pass resolutions, and vie for supremacy. Separate from that, the forums of Nation States is a place where people post in character as emissaries from their fictitious countries to brag about their totalitarian regime and brag about which memes are the dankest. The results are infurating. This week, you still like Huswyae, right?
26/09/161h 11m

227: Self Publish And Perish

Our modern internet affords lots of opportunities for self-expression. However, these things remain ephemeral, and some authors long for the physicality of the written word. Fortunately for them, there's America Star Books (formerly PublishAmerica), a self-publishing book company that's innovated the publishing world by removing all those annoying standards of quality. We're looking at a number of descriptions of these books, in the authors' own words (when those words aren't "description coming soon"). This week, you can have a free consultation with a werewolf, but I don't imagine it'll be helpful.
13/09/161h 32m

226: This Is Not A wikiHow Episode

Launched in 1999, eHow is a content farm built to give advice on how to perform crucial tasks and it is, crucially, not wikiHow. It's still very much F Plus worthy though, as you can see from articles like "How to Give a Milk Enema", "How To Text A Girl Without Being Creepy", and "How To Kick A Cocaine Habit At Home By Yourself". This week, The F Plus reads an entirely new category of poetry.
28/08/161h 27m

225: Something Something Disrupt

The internet is an exciting global landscape under constant dynamic upheaval. I have no idea what any of that means, but we're talking about tech startups here, so it doesn't really matter. We're looking at a site called IdeasWatch where people can pitch their ideas for an interesting app or innovation and then... well, nothing. It's ignored forever. This week, Lemon's still figuring out how to use his new microphone (sorry).
23/08/161h 10m

224: UGH! F Plus Raps

It's been too long since our last musical episode, but this one is worth the wait. We gathered together some of The F Plus' greatest hip-hop enthusiasts (and also Boots) to browse the internet's finest sources for hip hop lyrics; I'm talking about DeviantArt, WikiHow, Yahoo Answers, and some site from Colombia. The result will make you kill a rainbow. This week, The F Plus lost their minds. Eight times!
13/08/161h 18m

223: Penis Problems & Water

Do you understand homeopathy? We don't. So we brought The Internet's own K. Thor Jensen along as we took a good long browse through the forums of ABC Homeopathy. We still don't understand homeopathy, but now we know that a lot of the men who are into it have small, thin penises which don't work very well. This week, Jimmyfranks doesn't count.
11/08/161h 22m

222: The Left Hand Complaints

With an estimated 2.4 million visits per hour, PornHub is one of the most popular websites on The Internet. In serving up petabytes of data to a huge customer base who are, by design, short term participants you might think that these participants would prefer to be anonymous. As an F Plus listener, you are probably also aware that there's a certain category of people who have a lot of opinions about the pornography they consume. To that end, this is PornHub Feedback: A place for people to argue about how their fetishes should be treated, Britain's role in the EU, and shadowy conspiracies that present you with niche porn that match your thought processes. This week, listen to F Plus Premium for only 40 million sexcoins.
29/07/161h 17m

221: Specialty Wankers

The Internet is frequently looking to expand the scope of human knowledge, and My Masturbation is a site doing that in a unique way. Offering hundreds of unique masturbation suggestions for both men and women, reading this site turned out to be way grosser than any of us were prepared for. In fact, this very nearly didn't end up getting released as an episode at all, until the raw files were dumped onto ballp.it and Djeser saved it from oblivion. This week, Nutshell's neighbors can hear us.
21/07/161h 8m

220: Girl Pits Boys

As we've demonstrated so far, human sexuality is a complicated and frequently confusing morass. And to that end, we present to you: The men of GirlPits. They like the armpits of girls. A lot. And now it's time for you to hear about it. This week, body odor gets a theme song.
16/07/161h 14m

219: Teens Talkin Trash On Gaia Online

With over 28 million members and 13 years of history, Gaia Online could accurately be called one of the most popular forums on the internet. It's central feature is a gamification effort where members can dress up their paper-doll avatars with bits and baubles while they discuss their favorite animes or (in the case of this episode) the troubles with feminism and the right way to sell your panties online. This week, I'm nawt sure wut slip'n'slope wuz supposed ta b dere wen child touchin' hath been Mohammad-san's way o' lyfe 4 over a millenia.
08/07/161h 15m

218: Idiocy is the Mother of These Inventions

In the past, The F Plus has provided listeners with all sorts of inventions that the internet has come up with and wants to sell to the general public. And, well, let's not complicate matters. We're doing that again. Lest you fear repetition, have you heard about the iPhone app that eliminates child negligence, a fitness regimen based on lifting women, or a sporting event played by ghosts? Because you're about to. This episode is copyright Chug Nug.
03/07/161h 19m

217: Steal This Episode

The internet is frequently a place where people brag about their talents in a particular skill, and if that skill is stealing things from stores, well that's just fine. We're looking at the people who steal, proudly, and they have things to say. Some of those things are coherant. This week, The F Plus gets some bonus tips on how to be a Sugar Baby.
25/06/161h 18m

216: DOWNLOADING PLACEBO.EXE

Victor is feeling a little under the weather, and it just so happens that Quantum Man offers "The World's First Downloadable Medicine". In keeping with the spirit of alternative medecine served over the internet, Quantum Man is a gaudy site that promises to cure influenza, malaria, meth addiction, constipation, food allergies, insomnia, erectile dysfunction, and not having your prostate stimulated. And in addition to all that, the product can perform the ever-popular "cleansing your body of toxins", all for the cost of many installments of another cost. But how does it work? Computers are involved. Beyond that: Shut up. The F Plus is supercharging our prostates.
20/06/161h 12m

215: Oculus Cruft

It's a confluence of technologies and interests that brought us to this point, but we're here. With a number of viable VR options released to the market, we find ourselves taking our first clumsy steps towards fully realized, three dimensional, immersive, interconnected, user created worlds. And the subjects of this episode have gathered together and announced clearly and in one voice: "I want to jizz all over that!" This week, The F Plus witnesses the birth of a brand new fetish.
10/06/161h 33m

214: Jerks Off Of Jerking Off

NoFap is a community, fortified by Reddit, where men (and hypothetically women, but always men) can discuss how they've reached their full physical and intellectual potential since they've stopped masturbating. And the results are self-evident when you read the one act plays where parts of their brain argue with their penis. It's a community of tense individuals, and we're gonna figure out why. This week, Frank West tests his Progressive Death Mettle.
03/06/161h 17m

213: You're Reviewing It Wrong

A self-published author has a difficult job to do when it comes to promotion. They've got to follow sales, trends, promotions, press, design, and beyond all that, they go on Good Reads and yell at people who didn't like their book. Well, maybe they shouldn't do that last part, but the subjects of today's episode do that anyway. We're looking at authors who, around the internet, show up to berate, insult, and argue with people who say unfavorable things about a book they've written. It's kind of like the Correct The Record PAC, except without the funding. This week, listeners will say wonderful things about this episode (and they already are), but who in the world are you?
27/05/162h 8m

212: History of the Dozerfleet Part 2

In late 2013, we focused on a particular man who calls himself The Dozerfleet Founder; a person who has written over a thousand pages of wiki devoted to himself, and the projects he would like you to give him credit for. We felt our work was pretty exhaustive on the subject, but we're aware there's plenty we missed. In this episode, we spend some time looking at the song parodies The Dozerfleet Founder has written, some television projects we weren't aware of, and finally end up on TV Tropes because of course. This week, The F Plus karaoke sequence is malfunctioning.
23/05/161h 17m

211: LIZARDS!

For decades, David Icke has been speaking loudly and publicly about his hypothesis that Reptoids (that is, beings who appear human but who are actually decendents of the Lizard People who live in the center of the Earth) walk among us and are plotting to enslave humanity. And of course, that's interesting and all, but we're going to be looking at the forums of the David Icke website to read the opinions of the people who took this theory and ran with it. This week, The F Plus better not be looking at pictures of human feet.
07/05/161h 12m

210: Adventures in ReTale

Working in retail can be a stressful and thankless experience, but as in all things, the internet is there to help. NotAlwaysRight is a place where visitors can share their stories of totally pwning the customers they had to deal with and how impressed everyone was with that experience. This week, The F Plus wonders "God, what is this madness?" PS: Lemon apologizes in advance for confusing Kevin McCarthy with Mark McKinney. It's eating him up inside.
17/04/161h 11m

209: Clips Against Humanity

Founded in 2001, clips4sale.com has served as an open-air fetish bazaar catering to all sorts of hyperspecific sexual interests of the people who are willing to pay a premium. We try to prepare ourselves, but nothing could prepare us for these animated GIFs. This week, The F Plus reacts to visual things. And you would too, buddy.
10/04/161h 29m

208: I Am Only A Mouth Yet Cannot Scream

Sooooo..... Fleshlight has forums. Did you know this? We didn't know this. Spooks found out about it and now that's what we're reading. As it turns out, this is a surprisingly active forum with a community of members who discuss the finer details of the plastic sleeve that they masturbate into. With that comes some of the standard themes you'd expect, like Harry Potter and gay panic. This week, The F Plus gets it on while Jimmyfranks is jammin' on his bass guitar.
06/04/161h 21m

207: Can I Borrow Your Brain?

There's a number of websites out there that can try to teach you some certain type of magic spell, or some certain type of mind control technique, but the superpredators over at Xtreme Mind take a shotgun approach to their methods, selling Neurolinguistic programming, mind power machines, magical wish fulfillment, orgone boxes, and pretty much anything else that they think will get clicked on. This week, The F Plus is posing magestically in front of red backgrounds.
02/04/161h 18m

206: Return To Castle Experience Project

The Experience Project is a site where members can share their own life experiences. And then, because this is the internet, those very same members can argue with each other about who is the worst human being alive and then overshare their own fetishes. This week, The F Plus starts our own jam band.
19/03/161h 11m

pdx1: A Portland Podcast

Lemon recently visited Portland. He met up with his friends Jack Chick and Nutshell Gulag to explore the city's restaurants, shops and bars. When the day was over and the group had plenty of liquor in them, he decided to test their friendship by making them all read stories from a site called Booksie. Booksie is the premier platform for unpublished authors who are interested in publishing things where nobody is willing to see them. Then Jack Chick made a batch of whiskeynanners (from episode 204) and made us all eat some. This week, The F Plus stops you with a tree.
06/03/161h 8m

205: Altered Creeps

The Transformation Story Archive is a very old website where participants share stories about turning into different things: bears, statues, the other sex, and concepts too horrible to read out loud. As a result, this episode is shorter than most. But if you've been looking forward to an episode in which Bunnybread says "crotch" then you are in luck. This week, The F Plus mostly just mushes our breasts together.
22/02/1647m 39s

204: Slap 'Em Sane

We've focused on a lot of people with varying mental disorders, so it's time to talk a little bit about mental health. Andy Kadir-Buxton is an unlicensed medical practioner who, in addition to a number of other profound and confusing accomplishments, has invented a cure for "a wide variety of mental health problems". In addition to learning about the Kadir-Buxton Method, we'll also be discussing a number of Andy's other discoveries, his contributions to the British Space Administration, and his petition supporters. This week, The F Plus has an orgasmic nose.
13/02/161h 22m

203: It's Toasted

Hoping to make some better decisions in his life, Lemon's been taking some time self examining his smoking habit. Then he reached out to his friend Montrith to see if she had any related reading material which would speak to cigarette smoking's effect on the body and mind. Then Lemon was reminded that Montrith knows only agony. To that end, we take a long journey through Smoking Feels Good, and then close on Liberty Van. Then all that's left is for Lemon to edit a episode where the words "smoking" and "cigarettes" are uttered a couple hundred times. This week, The F Plus needs a domain name for their new yellow denture business.
06/02/161h 12m

202: The Forum And The Fury

Life can be frustrating at times. To that end, there are sites on the internet where people can go and type the subjects of their anger into a form for others to read. These screeds can be on any subject, and restrictions of logic, spelling or grammar do not apply. Also, posting a screed usually means you get involved in flamewars with the other users of this website. And while none of this is helpful for the people involved in posting on the website, the results can be read aloud and help you feel better about yourself. This week, don't smash your keyboard. A portal might open up.
30/01/161h 9m

200b: Retrospective | Part 2

For the second half of our restrospective, we've got a lot of topics we need to cover, including how Victor Laszlo deals with depression and what STOG does in an elevator. Those important matters discussed, we touch on the visibility of women on the internet, how The F Plus met Left Handed Radio, and jokes so bad that they need to be augmented with crickets. The ridiculists then share a few stories about dealing with exhibits in real life, some favorite (and regrettable) moments from the podcast, and a bit of our plans for the future. All this, plus some clips that will delight and/or enrage, depending on how your day is going. Enjoy!
21/01/161h 44m

200a: Retrospective | Part 1

For our 200th episode, The F Plus is looking at a very strange group of people called The F Plus. This is part one of our retrospective episode, and seven of us are going to discuss the series of events that caused us to all know each other, start recording podcasts, and the absolutely terrifying act of meeting each other in person. Plus, we're going to be looking back on those moments that stuck with us, such as the Baby Drug Pusher, Boy Meat, and wanting to kill yourself because of your huge head. It's been quite a journey for all of us and now, perhaps, we've earned a couple of hours to reflect.
18/01/161h 37m

201: Funding The Infowar

For a number of years, and across several different forms of media, Alex Jones has been preaching his own brand of 鈥淭he Truth鈥 and has built a following doing so. Jones has an agenda to push, but more than that, Jones also has a whole bunch of crap to sell you. That's what we're focusing on here; a whole episode dedicated only to the products sold through InfoWars, including DVDs, shirts and nutritional supplements. We recorded this episode at the exact same time that an armed militia began their occupation of Malheur National Wildlife Refuge in Oregon. Coincidence!?聽Yes!
10/01/161h 19m

199: Episode #799

This episode comes to you from 600 episodes in the future! In that time, there are people who go to a poorly designed forum and say completely improbable things about themselves and how they got here, and these improbable things go completely unchallenged by the other posters on the forum. More importantly, they share schematics of how you can build your very own time machine. This week, The F Plus develops really negative opinions about Einstein.
01/01/161h 12m

198: Strong Body Feeble Mind

Fitness is important. I just typed that onto a keyboard after waking up with a hangover, smoking a cigarette, and then sitting in a chair staring at my computer screens for a couple hours. Sorry, what I was I talking about? So this is a bodybuilding episode. It's pretty funny, but I'm having a lot of trouble writing an episode summary for it, so I'm just gonna type into this box for a little while and then just publish the episode like this. This week, no homo.
20/12/151h 9m

197: Yahoo? Answers!?!?

It's been years since our last full journey to Yahoo! Answers, and it's actually kind of comforting to see how little the site has changed. From topics ranging from Race Relations in America to Anime Appreciation, as well as the ever popular "Hey, how do you spell the word pregnant?", Yahoo! Answers has always been a very reliable source of baffling and unintentionally hilarious questions from across the Internet. As long as there's a question, someone will have an answer, and sometimes that answer will just raise further questions. This week on The F Plus, Lemon just can't read the word "fights" for some reason.
14/12/151h 13m

196: Made With Mechanically Separated Podcast Parts

There's a lot of recipe websites out there, and a lot of websites owned by giant food conglomerates. Fortunately, the internet has a way of synergizing things and these corporations provide their very own websites which encourage people to cook with their products. Looking for a salad recommendation from SPAM? A cocktail recipe by Hormel? A filling desert that includes a large quantity of Velveeta? This is vertical integration at its finest. This week, The F Plus is cooking pad see ew with Raisin Bran.
07/12/151h 3m

195: Heaven And Urth

Urth looks and plays like the world's shittiest video game. The creators insist that Urth is not a game (which is why they call it Urth the Game), but a path to prosperity, a tool for resurrecting the dead, a meditation conduit to alleviate your fears, and a method for winning the lottery - not for the money, just, you know, to prove you can. But video game or not, you're still moving a man in a labyrinth to min-max your Spirituality. This week, The F Plus is droppin' payloadz all over the place.
21/11/151h 9m

194: r/ecuseyourself

No matter who you are, Reddit has something for everyone. A few examples include: complaining about women, complaining about video games, complaining about women playing video games, or (to our collective delight) sharing your terrible drawings of dragons. "But what about me?" asks the person who wants legal advice. "Where can I go to seek legal advice over... say... me being fined $2,500 by the man for thoughtcrime?" Welcome to r/legaladvice, weary traveler! Why not order a flagon of ale and share your embarrassing and impending legal doom? This week, we're having a sale on Oxy Cotton!
17/11/151h 11m

193: The Thing You Like In Pain

Fanfiction is a complicated artistic endeavor. To connect with an audience, a writer needs to exploit a subject that resonates with an audience, and then serve concept, dialogue and action which the audience would find pleasing. Or, if you're the people behind imaginensfwoah, you skip all of that completely. The characters are non-specific, the setting is non-specific, but the action taking place is 100% disgusting. This is very much one of the grosser F Plus episodes, just prepare yourself for that. This week, The F Plus is creeped out by that fifth dentist.
08/11/151h 10m

192: Patent Pretending

Okay, we've spent a couple episodes highlighting the brilliance of people who consider themselves "idea people", but now it's time to spend some time thinking about the other end of the supply chain. Idea Connection is a website that caters to customers who are looking for a terrific idea that they can purchase from the website, along with any relevant patents for this idea. There's only one small problem to this: These customers do not exist because these ideas are really stupid. This week, The F Plus is getting verbally abusive with our GPS devices.
01/11/151h 20m

live4b: F Plus Live 4 | Part Two

Part two goes to different places as we invite the lads from I Don't Even Own A Television to read what they've found. Also, while Adam Bozarth and Nutshell Gulag couldn't make it to the live show, they were kind enough to put together video packages in their stead. Lastly, there's a scene for a detective show (?) and STOG plays a dog. This one has a two remote segments that only exist in the YouTube playlist. Part Two Contains Nutshell Gulag cooks something (video only) Adam Bozarth I Want To Be Banksy (video only) bumpgrrl I Just Walk Away by MadHat886 Chris Collision The Worst Days: Part One by Jared E. Smith J W Friedman Enter the Wutang Clan by MrVoltz The Not Ready For YouTube Players: My Dark Dreams by Tony Clementz
25/10/151h

live4a: F Plus Live 4 | Part One

This is the audio for F Plus Live, part 1. All of these recordings are also available on video, thanks to Mique. We've put together an F Plus Live 4 playlist right here. We'll confess up front that the audio is... well, it's as good as it is. Lemon spent many hours trying to clean up the sounds, and believes it's good enough. But the content is what matters. The audio and video were each cut differently, each contain stuff the other doesn't. Part One Contains Frank West: Bipartisanship by Roscavenbar STOG: Sonic the Hedgehog: World War 2 Dragon by DarkDoomFireMaster Jack Chick: Vampires, Werewolves and Sparrow OH MY! by Kameya Sparrow The Not Ready For YouTube Players: Friday the 13th Part 11 Jason Vorhees by Jason Seamone
25/10/1556m 33s

live4c: F Plus Live 4 | Part Three

Part Three of F Plus Live 4 is brought to you by Wow, That's Almost The 90's Part Three Contains Bunnybread: about four minutes of ad copy (audio only) Adam Bozarth: Masturbate Night In America and A Girl (video only) Boots Raingear: The Defenestration of Cornelius Fudge by Qoheleth Lemon Butter Me Up by Pandanarchy Kumquatxop Harry Potter and the Horcrux of the Future by selenepotter Chris Collision & STOG: The Sky Is Falling! by E. B. McMillan
25/10/151h 4m

191: The Merchants of Urine

Have you ever been out in the middle of nowhere, probably camping or playing golf, and then realizing you really, really need to pee? Have you ever entertained the idea of being the secret MacGuyver of peeing, using a machine to discreetly empty your bladder while chatting with company? No? Okay, well, have you ever spent late nights on the Internet, looking for synthetic pee to go with your 'peeing robot' costume for Halloween? Not that either? Um... okay. Well, congratulations! Here's an episode about urine and urine accessories. This week, The F Plus has a few thousand photos to look at.
18/10/1551m 18s

190: Welcome To Planet Thumbsucker

Life is a scary and emotionally draining thing. So it's understandable that we deal with stress, loneliness and fear by using various coping mechanisms. We drink, we smoke, we have casual sex, and sometimes, we suck our thumbs. Nothing about this is terribly weird or shocking, right? Well, how about you spend an hour listening to internet spew about thumbsucking and see how you feel afterwards? This week, The F Plus pays very close attention to what thumb Cathy is sucking on.
28/09/151h 8m

189: Paranormal Stupidity

It's time for some spooky ghost stories! The website my-paranormal-experience.com is one man's mission to document other people's experiences with ghosts, psychics and other paranormal hullabaloo. This is all presented as fact, because why wouldn't it be? Learn about supernatural experiences that are completely unexplainable by any scientific rationale, like Netflix getting turned off or someone being angry. This week, The F Plus is... Steve? PS: Chris Collision apologizes in advance for his audio. He'll sound better at F Plus Live: A Two Day Event!
15/09/151h 7m

188: We Still Have Questions

We've asked a lot of questions on this podcast, but often the answers have not been satisfactory. I'm sure that's a trend that's going to change as we visit Quora: A top-ranked question & answer aggregator with a billion dollar valuation and the slogan "The best answers to any question". So we're all feeling super confident we'll get the best answers to questions like "Can Plants Fart?", "Why Aren't There Dinosaur Ghosts?" and of course the perennial favorite "How Can I Increase My Sex Power?" This week, The F Plus is being very progressive with our fetishes.
11/09/151h 3m

187: Attack Of The 50 Ft Episode

This episode is going to be huge! And other such puns about size, because for this episode we're looking at the confusing world of giantesses and shrunken men; These are people for whom the height of sexuality is found when two bodies are completely sexually incompatible with each other. This week, The F Plus opens our own fetish consultancy firm.
05/09/151h 15m

186: Hokum Pocus

The magick is still around us! For this episode, we're returning to SpellsOfMagic.com to learn some more terrific spells, most of which are very seductive in nature! This week, The F Plus learns the difference between the C String and the V String.
24/08/151h 17m

185: Because That's Stupid.

"Why not?" is the kind of question that carries with it a lot of connotations of poor thought processes, but in the case of this episode (recorded a while ago), "Why Not?" is the name of an idea dumpsite started by two Yale professors until they found something else to spend time on. The format should be somewhat familiar: People present unworkable solutions to problems nobody has, and then other people... do nothing at all. This week, beware of the joke locusts.
19/08/151h 19m

184: Watching You Watching Me Watching Your Watch

We've teased it out a couple of times, but now it's finally time to figure out what this watch fetish document is all about, although I cannot say that anyone is going to come out of the episode having had all their questions answered. But regardless, we're gonna be spending time on Watch Girls Forum; where people are very specific about their particular kink, plus I suspect it's British as well. This week, make sure you wear your watch on the right wrist.
09/08/151h

183: The Poems of Dishonor茅 De Ballsack

This time it's all poetry all episode! Specifically, erotic poetry. More specifically, "erotic" "poetry", because the things we're reading largely fail to meet the definitions of either of those words. This episode... eyyyyych! There's more. (additional material provided by Eye of Za and Montrith)
28/07/1559m 3s

182: Let's Do The Mind Warp Again

The human mind is a very confusing and (in some cases) profoundly stupid thing. And for the merchants and community of WarpMyMind.com, that can only mean one thing: opportunity! The purpose of this website is that some users will post hypnotic "curses" which cause the listener to do things many would find undesirable, such as a shift in sexual orientation or an inconvenient orgasm. Then, even more bafflingly, other users show up to purchase these curses and then kvetch on the forums about how terrible their life is now that they're cursed. This week, we find out what the F+ British Accent sounds like when it's a dog.
21/07/151h 18m

181: Go Fund Yourself

What a wonderful time it must be if you're the owner of a crowd funding website! Presenting one such example, GoFundMe is a crowdfunding site where people can raise money for a cause without being hampered by constraints like minimums or timelines. Is this a good model for persons deserving of help and/or charity? Emphatically yes. However, as you might expect, none of the people covered in this episode are terrific examples of this. This week, The F Plus is starting an anti-cowboy rodeo church.
15/07/151h 19m

180: r/un_away

There have been some recent controversies surrounding reddit, where just because of the actions of a few hundred thousand bad apples, the future of the website and of the fracturing social network is in question. But we at The F Plus are looking at the kind of thing the world would be missing out on if Reddit were to disappear today. To that end, we're reading the fetish prompts at r/dirtypenpals, to find the profiles of some netizens who are looking for love even though they are unlovable. This week, The F Plus is offering free drink refills and bottomless polka.
05/07/151h 1m

179: Use Only Food Grade Ingredients

Okay, I think it's high time for another food episode! This time around, A Meat and Montrith have provided us with a splendid menu of undercooked and shouldn't-be-cooked dishes, from appetizers all the way to desserts (with a special stop for Jello salads). What we might be lacking in mayonnaise we're more than making up for in Cool Whip and a miscegenation of pre-shredded cheeses. This week, The F Plus does market research into the cultural appeal of ghost poop.
27/06/151h 4m

178: The Measure of a Man (Base to Tip)

Body issues are a factor in just about everyone's life, but for a lot of men (and some women) the singular issue of penis size is an obsession which usurps just about everything else. The members of the Large Penis Support Group (or LPSG) are bonded by this preoccupation, and large penises, as an abstract concept, begin to shape their worldview. Meanwhile, for our part, we made fewer cheap jokes than you'd expect. This week, The F Plus is going to destroy your toilet paper rolls. Editor's note: Between the recording of this episode and the time it was released, the Large Penis Support Group forum had a massive structural overhaul. Congratulations, guys.
08/06/151h 18m

177: How To Listen To A Podcast You Hate

So have you had enough WikiHow episodes at this point? Of course you haven't. You are a human being with a capacity for joy and wonder. And there's a bunch of people who weren't in the other WikiHow episode who were jealous.
28/05/151h 37m

176: How To Listen To A Podcast Your Parents Hate

Boots gets more WikiHow for his birthday.
16/05/151h 19m

175: I Am I Am I Am (Annoying)

Does any modern society appreciate poetry more than the creative types over at Tumblr? Yes, of course. But would any other modern society be so quick to ape the creative output of Sylvia Plath in order to eke out some undeserved attention? Maybe, but for the purposes of this episode summary let's just pretend the answer is no. In this episode, we have a very, very specific rule; We are only reading pieces on Tumblr that have been tagged #SylviaPlath. The results will surprise you, but only a little bit. This week, the F Plus reinvents apple sauce?
07/05/151h 2m

174: Icky Pedia

So many video games are all about violence, where's the games with the sex in them? Well, it shouldn't surprise you to learn that they're here, and that's because they've been imported from Japan. Oh, and there's also a whole lot of violence involved, as well as massive amounts of misogyny and borderline beastiality. So... this is a gross one, if you haven't sussed that out yet. We're exploring the Monster Girl Quest Wiki, an exhaustive resource for an actual JRPG about a boy who must protect his sperm from a myriad of horrifying creatures. This week, The F Plus is bummed out by Iron Maiden.
29/04/1559m 33s

173: Sins of the Djinn

On this podcast, we've covered a lot of people who claim that imaginary things are real, BUT THIS... IS ANOTHER EXAMPLE OF THAT! We're looking at the universe of "Djinn", genie having people who have either conjured or purchased a noble thousands-year old spirit that they make do the dishes. Then things get weird after that. This week, The Thief of Baghdad is just looking for a nice cuddle.
11/04/151h 6m

172: Untidy Whities

Hey, so have you ever had a wedgie before? And follow up question, did you find the experience intensely erotic? Well, for your sake, I'm hoping the answer to at least one of those questions was "no", but the members of WedgieHaven.com are not quite so lucky. This week, The F Plus patents our unbreakable G-string formula.
04/04/151h 18m

171: r/mystupidopinions

There's so many opinions on the internet, and those opinions are held by people who take considerable effort to try to convince others that their own opinion is correct. But what happens if you want your opinion to be changed by facts and persuasive arguments that others provide to you? Well, hypothetically you go to r/changemyview, a subReddit where people share their own opinion, and then sit back and carefully consider every conflicting opinion that's presented to them. In theory, this is a terrific idea! This week, The F Plus discovers the White Power Black Hole.
30/03/151h 23m

170: Tickle Me Weirdo

Why do we like to laugh? A lot of reasons, really, but let's just go with "because it feels good". But if something just "feels good", does that mean that people on the internet will turn it into a fetish? Well, yes of course. It exists, so people on the internet turn it into a fetish. For this episode, we're examining the world of tickling enthusiasts; it's an overwhelmingly British community of people for whom "coochie coo" plays a disturbingly important role in their lives. This week, The F Plus lives in a Marxist Utopia.
20/03/151h 33m

169: I'm Gonna Cuddle Everybody In This Room

Being social animals, humans need human contact. There's been research done, but it's a self evident truth: We feel better about ourselves when we think there are others in our lives who support and comfort us. But what if nobody cares about you? Well, in that case you sign up for a cuddle party. A cuddle party is a place where people touch each other in a nonsexual way, insist that the way they touch each other is nonsexual, and use the word "boundaries" a lot. And if you aren't creeped out just yet, hit the play button and find out how long it'll take. This week, The F Plus puts touch in your sex.
13/03/151h 18m

168: Sir Rev. Dr. Prof. John Kitchin Ph.D, Esq.

You've probably come up with your own beliefs on sex, politics, race, religion, and capitalism, but you're about to realize that all of those beliefs are wrong. And maybe that reads like a strong declaration, but I bet it would be even stronger if was in 24pt Times New Roman orange bold italics. We're reading the personal website of John Kitchin, a homelesss Ph.D with a lot of ideas and just as much anger. This week, The F Plus is sick of binary code.
28/02/151h 18m

167: Hentaint Misbehavin

Luscious.net is a (hentai focused) pornographic website where members can do the things they usually do on a pornographic website - by which I mean set up a profile, argue about politics, and complain about problems getting laid. This week, The F Plus figures out that gender just isn't a big deal really.
22/02/151h 2m

166: Saturday Is Alright For Chickenfighting

Everyone wants to have a lover they can trust. Someone with whom they'll feel admired, safe, and unique, and someone who will pick them up when they are down. However, some specific people on the internet mean that literally. We're exploring the "lift and carry" fetish, a predilection of (almost entirely) men who are looking for (almost entirely) petite women to carry them on their shoulders. What's the meaning of this? I dunno for certain, but I'll assume it's British. This week, The F Plus avoids mentioning that Creed song.
17/02/151h 21m

165: Redefine Paranormal

There's quite a bit of debate on the existence of ghosts, and all of those debates are stupid and pointless. But fortunately, there's a forum over at anybodythere.net that sidesteps the debate completely and cuts straight to the evidence. Psychic powers, paranormal investigators, chakras, demon lovers, it's all here and it's all spelled as poorly as you would expect. This week, The F Plus finds one smiley particularly troublesome.
15/02/151h 32m

164: Father Goose's Nursery Crimes

Mpreg is a term that means "male pregnancy". And if you know that, you've been on the internet for too long. But you're in good company, because we're gonna spend the longest hour of our lives finding out what mpreg means, what people who are into mpreg fantasize about, and what exactly they think is so sexy about the whole thing. This episode, I shouldn't need to tell you, is very very gross. You should know that going in. This week, The F Plus enters the Pregnancy Olympics.
03/02/151h 13m

163: This Beat Is Dope

Drugs are expensive. Plus they're dangerous and illegal besides, so it should come as no surprise that there are swaths of people who are looking for alternative ways to get their collective swerve on. And with the sometimes predatory nature of internet marketing, it should also come as no surprise that there is a substantial number of people who try to convince themselves that listening to bleeps and boops in their headphones will totally give them the best trip of their lives. This week, we're looking at i-doser.com, a place on the internet where people can attempt just that. There's a company all too happy to take teenagers' money in exchange for those bleeps and bloops, and a forum full of teenagers who want to write about how high they are. The results are so much fun that the episode ended up over an hour after considerable editing. This week, The F Plus finally finds some jenkem.
24/01/151h 32m

162: Eee! Pinions!

"Caveat Emptor" the old adage says, but that adage is in Latin and doesn't mention the drive-thru window, so it might as well not even exist. We're looking at two different sites: ePinions and MeasuredUp, two different places on the internet where consumers can demand their voice be heard. Of course, nobody's actually going to pay any attention, but they can certainly demand it nonetheless. This week, we're all worried about Dimmy.
10/01/151h 9m

161: A Miserable Pile of Secrets

Vampires, as a concept, tend to fall in and out of favor, depending on the trends of popular culture. And with that shift in trends, so too is there a flux in the number of people who pretend to be vampires for whatever reason. But fortunately, there is help! Steve Leighton, the proprietor of vampirewebsite.net is a REAL vampire, and he has tips on how to find out if you are also a real vampire, and then how to distinguish yourself from the fakers. This week, The F Plus works on the pilot for our vampire sitcom.
02/01/151h 23m

160: To Serve Otherkin

Listen buddy, I don't want to eat your human food. I might look like a human, but I'm actually a bullfrog in my soul, so I want to eat bullfrog food. Except I don't want to eat bugs because that would be totally gross. And if that doesn't make any sense, you need to check your Making Sense Privilege. This week, we're exploring the delicious recipes of Kin Food: A website set up specifically to distribute recipes to tumblrites who refused to be pigeonholed (unless they're part pigeon and part hole). This week, The F Plus has a soft spot for people eating folks.
27/12/141h 6m

159: But Is It Deviantart?

We're all familiar with DeviantArt as the best place on the internet for crudely drawn pictures of Sonic The Hedgehog hit with a shrink ray and then eaten alive by the the girl in Lollipop Chainsaw. But did you know that DeviantArt also has a large archive of written work, such as poetry? And did you know that the great majority of that written work is terrible? Okay, I'm sure that second reveal wasn't much of a surprise, but we do have some in store for you. This week, Finland meets its match.
20/12/141h 10m

158: I Call It The Vaporhighzer

Conventional thinking leads to conventional problems. And when a conventional problem needs an unconventional solution, you'll need to step outside of your own mind to really understand the universal problems. And maybe that all looked like gibberish to you, but I'll bet it makes a lot more sense you get super duper high first. At least, that's the typical first (and second and only) step taken by the people of HighDeas.com; a place where the marijuana-inclined can gather and discuss what geniuses they all are except there's no way to prove it. This week, The F Plus makes a burrito turducken.
14/12/141h 21m

157: HSSSSFFFAWWW-WUGGHHHHHHH!

There's many non-orgasmic things that have been compared to orgasms, but probably none are quite as silly as the traditional sneeze. The subjects of tonite's episode would disagree, we're exploring SneezeFetishForum.org - a place on the Internet where interested parties can go to try to spell out sneezes, and then get super turned on at the spelling of those sneezes. This week, The F Plus hopes your mother doesn't get a cold.
07/12/141h 17m

156: Auto Moronic Asphyxiation

Internet eroticism is a varied, confusing, and repulsive subject. To that end, this is an episode about people who have sex with cars. Confused? Well, if you listen to this entire episode, you'll still be confused. And more than a little grossed out. But hopefully entertained. This week, The F Plus is using Jason's email address.
27/11/141h 3m

155: The Search For Terrestrial Intelligence

There's a whole lot of planets out there, but this one's mainly nimrods. We're looking at the curiously named alien-ufos.com, a very popular forum for true believers to discuss the various things aliens did to their butts. This week, The F Plus wants to get abucted (we will not state our reasons).
16/11/141h 25m

154: Witchyhow.com

We've done some other magick episodes, but we haven't yet learned the spell that causes any of this to make sense, so we're gonna keep at it. This time, it's PaganLore.com, another one man website with a bunch of poorly written spell instructions and appalling web design choices. This'll be the one where it all makes sense, I'm sure. This week, The F Plus needs to consult with our VCR.
10/11/141h 11m

153: What A Rip Off

With so many websites run by people with dubious ethics (take this one for example), we've been introduced to RipoffReport.com; an Alexa ranked website where the people who've been wronged can let the world know. With nearly 2 million reports filed, these people have a story to tell, but the story starts and ends with duh. This week, The F Plus wants to talk about your MILFaholism.
02/11/141h 4m

live3a: F Plus Live 3 | Weird Romance | Part 1

From the raucous Grumpy's Bar in Downtown Minneapolis, The F Plus Live is back! This time with an overarching concept of Weird Romance, you'll be hearing pieces many different books, all written by authors with different mental problems. John Toast: Sass Girls X by Imari Imarea Isfahan: Your Alpha My Mate by WolfWriter Boots Raingear, Kumquatxop & Lemon: Law & Order Fanfic by Where Did Angels Go? Bunnybread: Trolling For Pussy by Brenda Stokes Lee Frank West: Do Unto Others by Nick Stark Portaxx: Twisted! by Miranda Leek Victor Laszlo & STOG: Dark Knight Reboot (pt 1)
24/10/141h 18m

live3b: F Plus Live 3 | Weird Romance | Part 2

We got a lot of love to spread still. STOG: Becoming An Elf Mommy bumpgrrl: Konigsburg's Model Lemon: Popping It by Tim Popper Jimmyfranks: Pandora's Box by Em Furey John Toast, Bunnybread & Lemon: Law & Order Fanfic 2 by Where Did Angels Go? Jack Chick: Desire Untamed by Pamela Palmer
24/10/141h 10m

live3c: F Plus Live 3 | Weird Romance | Part 3

It's the last leg of F Plus Live 3, and we're not running out of energy. Boots Raingear: Taken by the T-Rex by Christie Sims The Not Ready For YouTube Players: Dark Knight Reboot, part 2 Adam Bozarth: The Painting Fuckerby Jonathan Platz-Halter Kumquatxop: Tears of a Clown Adam Bozarth & Frank West: Dark Knight Reboot, part 2
24/10/1455m 8s

152: This Ain't Episode 152 XXX

AdultDVDTalk.com is a forum where people talk about porn. And uh... Yeah, I think that pretty much covers it. This is definitely one of the gross ones. This week, The F Plus abandons our jerk off station.
11/10/141h 12m

151: F Plus Sings

SongWritingFever.com is a place on the internet where self-professed songwriters can post lyrics without accompaniment, and it's up to the internet to build a song around what they have. Alright then, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Our first-ever musical episode has 5 ridiculists trying their best to sing the unsingable. The rest is for the remix.
13/09/1456m 37s

150: Snoot By The Foot

It's probably a complicated confluence of biology and experience that leads a person to become a foot fetishist, but it is a confluence that clearly happens very often, if the internet is to be believed. What exactly is it that these foot fetishists seem to hold as a common interest? Well, if you ask the members of The Den Of Smelly Feet, the answer is... yeah, that. This week, The F Plus really wants to make out with Gary.
06/09/141h 20m

149: There's A Reason Why We Don't Do Drugs Together

When you get a room full of drug enthusiasts together, the topics of conversation are somewhat predictable; Terrible music, guys we ain't seen lately, and where can we get more drugs. But this episode explores what happens when those topics drift. We're going to The Hip Forums to browse some less popular forums, particularly sexuality and religion, and you WILL be horrified by what you find. No no no, you really will be. This week, The F Plus wants a boatboy (as soon as we know what one is).
01/09/141h 7m

148: Exclusive Unoriginal Content

The community of contributors to tvtropes.org are clearly experts in consuming mass media. They've honed their skills in identifying devices, contrivances, holes and structure in various plots, so much so that they may have distilled fiction as a whole into simple, repeatable formulas. Does that make them good writers? Let's find out! This week, The F Plus gets 241's at the Angsty Wang.
23/08/141h 14m

147: This Episode Doesn't Need A Title, Man

The understanding and definition of "truth" is constantly redefined, expanded, and re-evaluated with new information as it is learned. Fortunately for us, the brave citizenry of shroomery.org have taken more than their share of mind-expanding drugs, and now they are ready to share their knowledge. Knowledge about how to be a Muslim without believing in the Koran, or the best comedy routines on 9/11 conspiracy theories. This week, The F Plus learns what happens when you sit on a cake.
17/08/141h 16m

146: Don't Patreonize Me

What is the value of art? That's very difficult to say. It's possible to get your art to sell for hundreds of millions of dollars, but first you'll have to be dead and have your life's work liquidated by David Geffen. If you're unlucky, you're a webcomic author, constantly making Tumblr posts advertising your work to an audience of nobody waiting for the day that everything hits big. And that's where Patreon comes in. A crowdfunding service with no possible benefit for the world, Patreon wants to turn whiny, self-important Best Buy shelf-stockers into whiny, self important internet celebrities. This week, The F Plus can finally buy the special paper.
01/08/141h 19m

145: Elon Musk Won't Return My Calls

With a good idea and a great work ethic, anyone can find success. That statement isn't true at all, but what's more important is what happens when you have a terrible idea and no work ethics. We're looking at The Idea Wiki - a place where the internet can write down its poorly considered ideas for anything at all, and then close the browser window and go back to playing Minecraft. This week, The F Plus brings the chips to you (in the end).
26/07/141h 3m

144: Knowledge Is A Disease, I Have The Cure

The American medical apparatus is a frequenct source of discussion and consternation. We all want to be healthy and live long lives, but when for-profit institutions are supposed to help us with that goal, it's easy to get disillusioned. Lucky for us (and by us I mean the podcast), there's the eHealth forums. If you got a problem, and the only thing you're looking for is idiocy and crappy advice, boy do they ever provide. This week, The F Plus wants you to sniff our beer can.
20/07/141h 13m

143: Harry Potter and the Weekend Seminar

Have you ever thought to yourself "Man, I wish a pagan would come up to me and talk to me about how their religion works"? Well, that's a service you're gonna need to pay for. This is Wizard at Large Consulting, a company which.... uh.... you know, there's cleansing and reiki and stuff. This week, The F Plus is trying to avoid calling Nazi Christian Spiderman.
13/07/141h 14m

142: Indie Go Go Go Away

Hey guys, you remember that Kickstarter episode? We found worse than that on Indie Go Go. This week, The F Plus selects donors by fuckability.
05/07/1457m 29s

141: We're Gonna Need A Bigger Scrote

With sex still being something of a taboo subject, feelings of sexual inadequacy can be complicated. Are you emotionally strong enough to provide a sexual experience that's mutually enjoyed as adventure, discovery, love and combat? Probably not, so how about you just yank on your wang for about 12 hours and see if that makes things any better. This is the topic of penis enlargement. Does it work? You might be surprised to find out how inconsequential the answer to that question is. This week, The F Plus LOVES THE BEACH!
28/06/141h 11m

140: Is There Anyone With A Life on Mars?

-=ATTENTION EARTH PLEASE STAND BY FOR THE FOLLOWING URGENT MESSAGE Mars needs poets. Also copywriters. Because maybe if we draft better letters than this one we can hopefully get a couple people with some useful skills END TRANSMISSION=- This week, The F Plus' wives won't mind if we leave forever.
20/06/141h 5m

139: In a Past Life, I Was Also Insufferable

Death is a really, really terrifying prospect, and people go through all sorts of convoluted processes to avoid thinking of their own death as an impending end. Some people make up entire past life stories for themselves that they can imagine their lives as part of a greater continuum. Other people go to the forums and read those past life stories in a silly voice, just to pass the time. This week, STOG's daughter is his mother.
15/06/141h 17m

138: The Sound Quality Is Inaudible

It's easy to wax poetic on the trancendant power of music as an art form. What goes beyond words, beyond thought, and into a pure rhythmic experience can change you irrevocably. And then you hear a Ke$ha song and wish music never existed. We're looking at extreme audiophiles - people who experience music in such a way that it can only be quantified by large sums of money spent on useless crap. This week, The F Plus ruins your speaker cables with our negative energy.
01/06/141h 19m

137: Please Direct Complaints to This Hole in the Ground

There's a lot that can enrage a person. And while that's a perfectly reasonable feeling to have, it's best if you have friends to confide in, to share in your frustrations, and to help you grow and become a better person. But, if you don't have that, the internet has plenty of form fields. Just type words into one of those. This week, The F Plus doesn't trust that 2 year old with the crack rocks.
24/05/141h 10m

136: This Testes My Limits

Sometimes it's difficult to write these episode synopses, so let's do this one direct: This is the ball busting episode. Horrible things happens to balls throughout this episode, which is shorter than most. This week, The F Plus won't let you visit your dragon grandmother.
11/05/1447m 24s

135: These Are a Few of My Favorite Kinks

This one is super duper gross. Anyway, The F-List (unaffiliated with The F Plus) is a community where furries can view the profiles of other furries to see if they're (cyber)sexually compatible. So, what's it take to make a love connection? Common interests, shared life goals, and enough opposing perspective to keep things interesting? Of course not. You just both need to be into navel play. This week, The F Plus explores The Fetish Matrix and very much earns our explicit rating.
02/05/141h 25m

134: Build a Better Buttplug and the World Will Beat Off

For projects in need of crowdfunding, Kickstarter has raised a billion dollars for projects, many of which were poorly considered, but none of them were overtly sexual in nature. What's the world to do when they want to fund the next generation of innovative porno and/or pneumatic dildos? They head over to offbeatr.com. This week, The F Plus signed you up for surprise phone sex.
23/04/141h 15m

133: Coldmouth Strikes Again

Alright now fellas, what's cooler than being cool? These tongues! We're spending some time on IceChewing.com. As the name would imply, it's a place on the internet for persons who chew on ice to talk to other people with the same fascination, learn about the reasons that they share their passion, then ignore medical advice and go back to their ice chewing. This week, The F Plus wants to talk to you about the company refrigerators.
12/04/141h 16m

132: Skyrim Has Crashed (User Decency Error)

With over 20 million units sold, The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim has been a shared part of our cultural experience. It's an open world game where you can slay dragons, accept missions, and explore a world created for you. But you know what you can't do? Drink a potion to make your penis four feet long and then use it as a truncheon to assault thieves. And that's where the mod community comes in. We're looking at loverslab.com - a place on the internet where perverts can share and discuss different Skyrim sex mods and complain about how none of them are any good for some reason. This week, The F Plus isn't going to judge your personal footjob technique.
04/04/141h 28m

131: Ask a Stupid Question, Make a Stupid Podcast

What is there to say about BlurtIt.com that hasn't already been said about the Visigoths? Well, quite a bit, now that I think of it. The point is that BlurtIt is a populist Q and A website, less popular than (but just as stupid as) Yahoo Answers, where people ask all sorts of dumbfounding questions about genitals touching other genitals, and then the answers prove dumber than the questions. This week, The F Plus is suffering from panic panic.
29/03/141h 10m

130: Achievement Unlocked: Downloaded Podcast (40G)

When the internet shrunk our world, it became easier for everyone to compare their own lives against those of their peers and, invariably, feel meloncholy about what they've become and eat a bunch of ice cream. But there are those who rise above this sort of thing, and they are called gamers, or more accurrately, ---+==G4/\/\RZ==+-----. We're looking at True Achievements, a site that assigned each man a number, and then quickly went back to playing Halo again. This week, Mario Lopez steals your girl.
14/03/141h 19m

129: You May Now Fistbump the Spouse

As social mores have changed in the past century, the wedding has evolved dramatically. No longer is it a dogmatic ceremony of tradition, but it can be a celebration of love, community and family. Or it can simply be a fun party. Or, with the internet's help, it could just be another vain blog entry where you explain to a hostaged crowd what a special snowflake you are. This week, The F Plus can't stop laughing (our tongues turned blue!)
26/02/141h 12m

128: Pioneers of Squat Cracking

Do you ever feel imprisoned by your own life choices? Bills, jobs, responsibilities... it's like we're not even alive anymore! Wouldn't it just be nice to be out there, alone, on the road, making your own way in the world, contracting cholera and giving blowjobs to truck drivers? The people of Squat the Planet think so! This week, The F Plus makes sure there aren't any homos in the bathroom.
16/02/141h 21m

127: Cosplay to Win the Cosgame

Hey, did you ever have a good friend, and your friend was a really good dresser, and you thought "I'm gonna steal her entire outfit and wear it myself and pretend to be her and go to social gatherings specifically for other people who do this sort of thing?" Of course not, that would be creepy. But what if it's not a friend, but a cartoon character? Still creepy? We'll find out as we read Cosplay.com. This week, we're selling our eggs.
12/02/141h 21m

126: Acquire the Spiritual Energy of a Tiny Dead Pharoah

Hey, put this wire pyramid on your head, will you? No it doesn't look stupid at all. And it aligns your chakras or something. Okay, I need $300 please. This week, The F Plus chooses between extreme detoxification and profound detoxification.
05/02/141h 13m

125: This One's Mainly About SLEEEEEEEP.

Look at your hand. Look at the detail in your hand. Look at the center of your hand. Sleep. Deepener. This week on The F Plus, your boobs are making us gay.
27/01/141h 7m

124: Well, Since You Asked

Finally, a place on the internet where people can talk about themselves! ExperienceProject.com caters to people with all sorts of problems, diagnoses, and opinions. The only thing that matters is that nobody has to care. This week on the F Plus, we admire our Hunger Games standee.
19/01/141h 23m

123: The Beatings Will Continue until Dinner Improves

Does a strict Christian lifestyle prohibit a kinky sex life? As you might expect, there's varying beliefs on this which are nuanced and subtle, so here's the Cliff's notes version: If it gives me a boner, God wants you to do it. We're looking at the life choices made by the Christian Domestic Discipline movement - a patriarchal society who believe men should control women, and use the word "panties" as often as possible in doing so. This week, we're telling your mother EVERYTHING.
11/01/141h 3m

122: The Gospel of Saint Jimmy Olsen

Religion is one way to find meaning in one's life, and while it may be spiritually fulfilling, it's still not as fun as sitting in your room and reading Batman comics all day. Well, fortunately these are two great tastes that can go great together. This episode is about Pop Culture Pagans - People who believe their favorite fictional characters are their gods. No, really, they actually totally mean that. This week, you can add graveyard dirt if you like.
06/01/141h 10m

121: A Not at All Brief History of Dozerfleet

The artist leads a difficult life. Struggling to make sense of the world around him, he must create what is in his heart, then endeavor to show the world the truth he believes they must understand. Of course, the artist is a sucker. What he could be doing is putting together a massive wiki talking about himself, performing the same function with a lot more clarity. We're looking at Dozerfleet Productions: One man's quest to get somebody, anybody interested in what he has to say. This week, we're made to feel a little uncomfortable around purple pens.
29/12/131h 8m

120: Treat Me Like Garbage (But Really Nice Garbage)

Living in the 21st century means living in a disposable world. And as human interaction becomes as cheap as the products we use to emulate that interaction, you start to think about love as a disposable commodity, ready to be thrown in the trash at a moment's notice. And then you notice you have a boner because you read the word "trash". We're looking at trash fetishists - people turned on bythe bins, the bags, and of course the filth. This week, The F Plus considers a new kind of Sharia law.
20/12/131h 22m

119: How to Listen to a Podcast (Abridged, With Images)

Boots wanted more WikiHow.
14/12/131h 22m

118: My Little Podcast: Fandom Is Tragic

My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic premiered in 2010, almost exactly a year after The F Plus' first episode. But despite this, we've intentionally avoided the topic of Bronies throughout the podcast simply because it seemed too simple and straightforward to spend an hour going "I find cartoon horses sexy". Of course, we should have realized that is the entry point and it gets more insane from there. This week, nuzzling!
08/12/131h 9m

117: My Mistress is Machine Washable

Many children find comfort in stuffed animals as constant companions along their journey of growing up, providing a silent, understanding, and eternally available presence in a strange and overwhelming experience. Then, for a very very very small minority of people, those thoughts change. What was once a reliable friend becomes a masturbation sleeve, except it's worse than that because you insist you love it. That's right, it's plushies. This week, The F Plus tells another story about Mother.
03/12/131h 24m

116: Does An Ellipsis Count As Three Words?

Every year when November rolls around, conversation frequently drifts into one of two subjects: The moustache I totally would be growing if circumstances were different, and the novel I totally would be writing if circumstances were different. In this episode, we're concerned with the latter: Persons participating in National Novel Writing Month (or NaNoWriMo), mainly by hanging out on a forum and spitballing crappy ideas around. This week, The F Plus buys a hundred head of Satan's cattle.
25/11/131h 8m

115: Why Can't Social Studies Be More Like Call Of Duty?

One of the reasons why so many movies and televisions shows are set in high school is because, to varying degrees, the high school experience leaves an indelible mark on all of us. Our first experiences with sexual rejection, social politicking, and your own purpose in a greater society - these are difficult concepts which frustrated many of us when we were teenagers. And then, as we learned from school-survival.net, these can also be concepts some of us never grasped, and never could manage to get over. This week, The F Plus wants you to lose weight for school pictures.
11/11/131h 27m

114: I Don't Make Eye Contact On The First Date

In a pre-internet age, the best way for young guys who had problems finding love to meet other guys with the same problem was to ask the question "Hey dude, do you play Magic: The Gathering?" The community has become marginally more sophisticated since then and the term "incel" (involuntary celibacy) was born. "Involuntary Celibacy?" you ask, "isn't that a really irritating way to say that you can't get laid and pretend like it's a political group?" Well, welcome to love-shy.com, there's gonna be a whole lot of that kind of thing here. This week, The F Plus gets off just looking at each other.
02/11/131h 22m

113: Boink The Clown.

Coulrophobia (the fear of clowns) is a word that's only about three decades old. Presumably before that, people who were terrified of clowns were just called Person Who Has Seen A Clown Before. But a much less discovered topic is the one of coulrophilia, translated from the latin it means Perverts That Get Boners When They Think About Clowns Doing It, or more simply Tuesday on Fetlife. This week, The F Plus accidentally applies to work in the Circus.
09/10/131h 15m

112: I've Got My Spine, I've Got My Woman Crushed

There's moments of blissful comfort that can be undeniably wonderful. To find someone that you care about, and wrap their body around your own, silently sharing a few moments of euphoric, peaceful togetherness, is there anything better than that? The people in this week's episode would say: Yes, it would be better if she was flat and she just spent an hour talking about how flat she was, that would be totally hot. Because this podcast is still going strong, and as it turns out we haven't exhausted the weird fetishes yet, so this time it's about the object of your affection being flat. This week, The F Plus can't just play the theme song once.
03/10/131h 9m

111: Pokemon XXX & Why?

Emily Dickinson is often quoted as saying "The heart wants what it wants." She died in 1899, over a hundred years before the popularization of the modern internet. But I put the following question to you: If Emily Dickinson was alive today, would she have an account on the Serebii.net forums? More importantly, and stay with me here, would she go on the Serebii.net forums and participate in a 100 page thread about people who are sexually attracted to Pokemon? You can't, with absolute 100% certainty, say no, which is the same thing as yes. This week, Ampharos promises to be gentle up there.
26/09/131h 4m

110: This One's Mainly About Butt Ghosts

According to a 2012 Huffington Post omnibus poll, 45% of Americans believe that ghosts are real. And according in a 2008 survey published by Psychology Today, 44% of women admit to having rape fantasies. Statistically, this leaves an inevitable overlap for those two Venn circles, and that's what we're exploring. From several sites around the internet, this is Astral Sex - it's kind of like a Scooby Doo parody porno, except all the visualization is being done in your head, which probably makes it worse. This week, we're back from some time off, and THIS is what we're reading!?
12/09/131h 8m

109: Your Role Is Played Out

As modern people, it's easy for us to find our day to day lacking in dramatic moments. Of course, it could be up to all of us to go out in the world and find our own adventure, to live the life that each of us have been briefly allotted. The thing is though, finding our own adventure sometimes means losing your internet connection, so screw it. Outside is overrated anyway. And so say the members of Chicken Smoothie, a kid-friendly furry virtual-pet trading thingamajig with a very active community of role play forum posters. This week, there's no laws about The F Plus (just a long list of rules).
16/08/131h 9m

108: The Staind Lyrics In My Signature Will Demonstrate My Intellect

On a planet with a population of 7 billion, it's easy to get overwhelmed by the shortcomings of other people. Hopefully you have friends, loved ones, and a strong vibrant community where you can be a part of a greater whole, providing for others while benefitting from their care. But if there's not the case, there's a lot of other angry idiots on the internet you can shout at. We're looking at whyihatepeople.com, a site where you can complain about the stupidity of others while trying avoid pot/kettle conversations about your own stupidity. This week, The F Plus has been thinking about peeing on your coat.
04/08/1358m 56s

107: Trash At Demonhead

It's hard for an independent game developer to break into the business. With average budgets for high profile games now exceeding $20 million, and an ever increasing number of different publishers competing over market share, how is a guy with no education and no experience going to create, publish and market his own game? The answer is simple: He's not! And that's totally fine, because the game he would have created would have just been a rehash of other games using characters he didn't own the rights to. We're looking at the Fantendo wiki - a place where people can skip game development and cut straight to game journalism. Because really, the journalism's the most sophisticated part. This week, The F Plus needs to stay radical or it will implode!
01/08/131h 3m

106: Asgard Doesn't Have Alimony Laws

Love is a curious thing. The thing that drives two people together into a passionate embrace is as complicated as it is powerful. But the thing that drives one person to claim that they're married to a Norse god? That's called "being a crazy person". We're taking a look at Lokiwives and godspouses: People who claim to be in a polygamous relationship with one or more gods, and report that the sex is terrific. This week, wherever you go, whatever you do, these people still won't make any sense. Editor's note: Documents were provided for this episode by Sherlockian and Gaylord McHappenstance as well.
25/07/131h 3m

105: The Only Thing I Know Is That I Am An Expert In Everything

From the very beginning, the Internet was created as a method of transferring useful, verifiable, and well sourced information from one place to another. Then some other guys showed up and said "Free information? There's no money in that!", and thus our lives were forever changed by the ASP.NET framework. But when it comes to monetizing expertise, no website charges as much while supplying as little as LivePerson.com: A multi-million dollar website where morons sell information they don't have to suckers who don't know they don't have it. This week, The F Plus is reading strategy guides to this year's Christmas Games.
14/07/131h 8m

104: Your Universe Is My Universe's Therapist

Any wise man must know that there is much to the universe that he does not know. But the wiser man makes up a bunch of crap about other universes and then sells that crap to suckers for two hundred bucks a pop. On a completely related note, Burt Goldman wants to welcome you to Quantum Jumping. What is Quantum Jumping? That's privileged information, I'm gonna need your bank account information first. But while we're waiting for this transaction to process, how about I read some testimonials? This week, Isfahan will not hesitate to shoot his doppelganger.
28/06/131h 10m

sf: A San Francisco Podcast

LIVE from the home of Zynga, it's The F Plus Podcast! When Lemon and Boots visited The City By The Bay, they felt it was perfectly appropriate to sample the culinary traditions of such a vibrant and exciting city. Then, after eating some really good tacos, they made some raw food garbage based on recipes they found on the internet. Have you ever wanted to know what raw vegetable makes a perfect substitute for linguine? Or how changing the color of your salt can improve your chakra? Of course not, because you're not an idiot. This week, The F Plus plays the crunch twice for good measure.
18/06/131h 28m

103: Was It Worth It?

I guess if you think about it for a little while, you could probably come up with a couple good things that women have provided for the world. Apparently the square bottom paper grocery bag was invented by a woman, also COBOL, and say what you will about the execution, but Toxic is a pretty catchy song. Still though, for the writers of sites like the-spearhead.com, avoiceformen.com and Men Going Their Own Way, that simply isn't enough. These are some dudes that have some issues with women, and like a lot of things, that's the fault of women. This week, The F Plus feels emboldened by the smell of urinal cakes.
13/06/131h 5m

100b: Episode 100 (Part Two)

For the 100th Episode of The F Plus, we wanted to take a couple of hours exploring the internet's stupid and misguided history, tackling some subjects from many years ago that have stuck with us like a herpes sore. This is part two. Part one is here Alex Chiu Is Going To Make You Gorgeous Matthew Moulton Has A Hard Time Making Friends Why Is It That People Forget About The Elven Holocaust? And Then Legolas Said "Which Voice Did I Use For This Again?" Dave Hopkins Doesn't Need To Listen To Your Criticism
02/06/131h 27m

100a: Episode 100 (Part One)

For the 100th Episode of The F Plus, we wanted to take a couple of hours exploring the internet's stupid and misguided history, tackling some subjects from many years ago that have stuck with us like a herpes sore. This is part one. Part two is here Ulilillia Really Likes Pizza, Some Colors, And Bubsy (and he has the math to prove it) David Gontermann Has An Unhealthy Conversation With An Underage Hedgehog JustinRPG Goes On A Talk Show To Explain His Love For Reshiram I Genuinely Have No Idea Why I Can't Get Laid, I Presume It Must Be A Conspiracy The Rat Porn Lady Is Going To Cast A Spell On You Yiff The Otter Let's Read Random Selections From Time Cube HI I'M CAROLE AND I HATE MY BODY Pinku Is Japanese For Pink
02/06/131h 58m

102: I've Also Got An Idea For A Reboot Of Young Guns

With operating budgets starting in the millions of dollars, the American Motion Picture is not an art form prone to risk or innovation. As the internet democratizes art, fresh ideas can come from anywhere. Take, for example, the website FilmProposals.com, where people write down poorly considered movie ideas to an audience of nobody for no reason whatsoever. Could this change the face of Hollywood? Sure, why not? This week, sex will be had (like it or not).
13/05/131h 23m

101: I Hope My Kids Never Evolve

Many people would agree that monkeys, by and large, are pretty cute. This is why they make popular zoo attractions, popular designs on t-shirts, and popular themes in nursery gear. Because we like looking at monkeys, they're a lot like us. But not so much like us that we'd consider adopting one and raising it like it was our own child. Well... most of us wouldn't do that.
15/04/131h 6m

99: Mr. Gandolfini? We Have A Few Rewrites.

The F Plus has spent a number of years exploring odd areas of the internet in order to present you with material you might find thought provoking, interesting, horrifying, or otherwise upsetting to your worldview. Sometimes. We sometimes do that. Other times we find crappy fanfiction and read it derisively. This week, The F Plus has forgotten what The F Plus did with all the prounouns The F Plus had.
09/04/131h 8m

98: Can't Say I Approve Of Your Methods, Mister Holmes

For over a hundred years, the character of Sherlock Holmes has been an inescapable touchstone of Western Culture. The subject of sixty stories written by Arthur Conan Doyle has led to more radio, television film and stage adaptations than even Wikipedia would care to document, and you might say that since those original stories were published, these producers have been making fanfiction. However, it wasn't until the 2010 BBC series that the fanfiction became as creepy as it could be. This week, The F Plus finally figures out spooning.
31/03/131h

97: Even Nonsense

"Culture" is a tricky word, but it best describes our modern popular arts and entertainment, regardless of quality. When it comes to music, the disposable profit-motivated pop music released over the past 60 years has done far more to influence our way of life than the hundreds of years of finely crafted art before it. Maybe this is a condemnation of the direction humanity has taken, or maybe it's that it's way more fun to listen to "Shoop" than it is to read Leaves of Grass. But have you ever taken a moment to consider who was really responsible for all of this? Because it turns out it's just some lady with a blog. This week, we're writing the definitive Nirvana biopic. Editor's note: Cleretic also submitted a document with this content.
27/03/131h

96: Hocus Bogus!

Here's the thing about our AllRecipes episodes: Sure they're stupid, but food actually exists. Welcome to SpellsofMagic.com, a place where you go in knowing that you'll be reading instructions on how to cast magic spells and yet you're still surprised by the poor writing abilities. This week, if you take this podcast as a joke you'll have to restart life. Editor's note: Montrith provided additional content for this episode. Thanks Montrith.
19/03/131h

95: Why Crush A Bug When You Can Ruin It Emotionally?

This is an episode all about people who are sexually aroused by insects touching their genitals. So if you hit play, that's your business.
05/03/131h 4m

94: I'm Really More of An Idea Guy

Politicians would insist that American ingenuity is the reason for American exceptionalism. They are, of course, lying. All it really takes to be exceptional is the belief that you are exceptional, everything else is just details. Fortunately for the subjects of tonite鈥檚 episode (the members of InventorSpot and AHHHA) details aren鈥檛 important. They have an idea. They haven鈥檛 given it any thought, they won鈥檛 give it any effort, and it鈥檚 not a good idea in the first place, but they have an idea. This week, pay attention or it's the naughty chair again.
15/02/131h 10m

out10: Braking Bad: Aliens Attack

We were actually recording a completely unrelated episode when we stumbled across this content by accident. So, we just did what comes naturally to a young man.
02/02/139m 22s

93: I Can't Put Up With You People Because You're Bastard People

The last dozen years of internet development has brought avenues of conversation we wouldn't have thought possible in the previous dozen. And yet, through all of this, is there any place at all where ill-informed idiots can gather together and spew pointless hate about random subjects? The answer of course is yes, there is all sorts of places where that exact thing happens. And yet, it wasn't until JustRage.com that anyone actually thought that would be a valid thing for a website to specialize in. This week, you get drunk, you skip school, just have sex already.
02/02/131h 11m

92: We Don't Not Need No Uneducation

Parenting, as many have said, is a difficult task. But it's a task that's made significantly simpler if you just decide you'll let your children do whatever they want. We're exploring the forums of mothering.com, a place where mothers can gather to discuss raising the single most brilliant and unique person the world has ever known, but it turns out there's quite a few of them. This week, we're stocking up on Placenta Helper.
21/01/131h 4m

91: Boy You Fellas Sure Hate Frenulums

There's around 7 billion living human bodies on this Earth, and while there's some general variance between them, you'll find a lot of similarities. And the members of bodymod.org finds this all dreadfully boring. Theirs is a place where people can gather to discuss doing terrible things to their flesh with other people who won't try to talk them out of it. This week, you're gonna wish we had anesthetic.
01/01/131h 7m

90: The Remainder of My Time Will Be A Series of Grunts

The opening sentence on debate.org describes the site as a "community where intelligent minds from around the world come to debate online and read the opinions of others." We decided this needed looking into, on the assumption that any website which would brag about the intellectual level of its debates might be fooling itself. What we found was a mish-mash of poorly reasoned arguments, pointless mental excercizes, and flat out stupidity. This week, The F Plus discovers if Justin Bieber is cute or not.
16/12/121h 9m

88: I Can See Your Retch Marks

It should be no surprise to any of you that a reasonable percentage of the population finds the female breast aesthetically pleasing. There are all sorts of scientific and emotional reasons for this, but some tastes can develop from there. Many would prefer that they have a certain girth but (much to the dismay of Coco T), many will also agree that there is such a thing as "too big". The writers in this episode, all of whom belong to the website TheOverflowingBra.com, would argue that breasts can't be "too big" unless the Earth fails to contain them, and then only just. This week, The F Plus delivers our one week payload.
02/12/121h 7m

87: So Clearly You All Hate Us

A little while ago, we opened it up to you, The F Plus listeners, to provide us with some of the most intensely absurd material we could find. Then we had troubles releasing episodes regularly, but the two are unrelated. The point is, we sounded the alarm, and several people inundated us with crazy. To celebrate that fact, we have here a selection of three of the most irritating and/or baffling submissions of the lot, wrapped up with a little bow. You know, for fun. This week, we introduce Jenny J Jay Number J.
29/11/121h 5m

86: All RFIDs In Me

Hypothesis, thesis, antithesis. It's those three words that distill the Scientific Method. A way of thinking that has brought our society the majority of the gifts given to itself over the last thousand years. But some people (mainly from the Southern US, to be frank) have decried this methodology, believing it unknowable when an inkling becomes a theory. This is all just as well, because the folks over at Godlike Productions have come up with a new crucible: Go to a hideous website, explain your theory to uncaring nitwits, and if you still believe what you think by the time the thread dies, your statement is fact. This week, The F Plus all have our hands on our vaginas.
16/11/121h

85: Drowning In A Bucket Of Words

Here is some poetry. It is butt.
06/11/1254m 52s

84: Elisha Cuthbert Has To Pee Sometimes

Explaining his methodology for creating tension in his films, Alfred Hitchcock said "There is no terror in the bang, only in the anticipation of it." This sums up the fetish of our subjects quite well, as long as you substitute "the bang" with "peeing". And substitute "terror" with "boner". And... well, you should probably misspell all the other words just to make it thematically appropriate. In this episode, we're looking at the writings of omoroshi fetishists 鈥 persons whom (for reasons known only to themselves) the idea of needing to pee is super duper hot. This week, you'll grit your death in agony.
18/10/121h 11m

83: Just The 160,000 Of Us

Some people believe that it's poor form to make fun of people with legitimate mental issues. We have a slightly different ethical stance on the matter, mostly centered around the fact that Connie Marshall makes us all giggle. But anyway, if you were to have this standard, where would you draw the line? If people with schizophrenia are off-limits, what about people who don't have schizophrenia, but pretend like they do? Wouldn't that just be a different kind of mental disorder? And if those people were banging on about how they're being persecuted by the "singlets", wouldn't that drain any compassion you might otherwise feel? To test all of these, we're exploring Multiple Systems - a complicated architecture drawn by people whose brains are basically a television with a hyperactive remote. This week, we're running out of voodka.
12/10/121h 3m

82: I Sink I Love You

As third wave feminism took hold in the 1990's, popular culture found themselves once again looking at the power dynamics of sexuality. Could a woman be strong and independent while still bandying around words like 鈥渟lut鈥? Perhaps. Can people live self-actualized lives and still secretly crave a certain sense of helplessness and longing for the strength of another? Probably. Is this a terrible summary for an episode that's all about ladies getting stuck in quicksand? Undoubtedly. We're exploring QuicksandFans.com - a site for people who really like to think about other people getting stuck in preposterous situations only slightly less embarassing than Mitt Romney's current campaign. This week, the F Plus learns the correct way to measure how much room there is in your bog.
02/10/121h 13m

81: Fear And Loathing of Las Chicas

As each generation ages, it looks back on the mistakes of generations before and tries to make changes. As a result, the status and politics of gender are in constant upheaval, as men and women are constantly redefining what it means to be a member of their sex. Learned sociologists have explored what it is to be a man, and our subject for this episode is not one of them. Instead, we're reading the musings of Michael Byc. He considers himself an alpha male as well as a writer, though we're left to guess which of these two things he thinks he's better at. This week, we're all wearing sandals.
19/08/121h 6m

80: Disliking This Episode is a Form of Harassment

A civilized society is a society of laws, but problems may occur when brilliant and cunning individuals find ways to circumvent the spirit of a law while adhering cynically to its letter. Our subject for this episode, Jonathan Lee Riches, is neither brilliant nor cunning, and it was his many thousand daliances with the legal community that got him a fair amount of gawker attention, and nothing much else. Can one man bring down the entire legal system just by filing frivolous lawsuit? Nope! Seems like he can't but that won't make him stop trying. This week, various buddhist monks finally get what's coming to them.
17/08/121h 4m

79: Help Me Help Rob Help You

Like any modern internet citizens, we mourn the loss of AskJeeves.com. Back in its heyday, you could ask Jeeves any question, and the software would provide a response. Okay, sure - the response that Jeeves would give would have nothing to do with your question, and would instead try to point you to the website of its sponsor, but at least it was comforting that whatever your question was, Jeeves felt he has an answer. As it happens, over at the website eHelp.com, there's a similar situation. Except instead of poorly written algorithm that randomly selects a sponsor, eHelp has one guy, or maybe it's a parrot. Anyway, you'll find out when you listen. This week, The F Plus learns if slavery was a good or a bad thing.
02/08/121h 1m

78: The Devil Went Down To Tumblr

As the debate about the United States being a Christian Nation鈩 rages on (mostly in the form of poorly conceived Chick-Fil-A marketing efforts), we at The F Plus (excluding its leader, who spent the week on other pursuits) found ourselves wondering: What is the truest vision of Hell, and is Brokencyde making records there? Fortunately for us all, Tumblr exists, and if there ever was a more informative website than Tumblr, I haven't seen it. Full disclosure: The writer of this summary has only ever seen Tumblr and CatsThatLookLikeHitler.com. This week, The F Plus has a coupon for half of any sandwich energy.
26/07/1259m 9s

77: Go Get 'Em, Tiger

In the four years that we've been cataloging the stranger parts of the Internet in podcast form, we've been asked why we've never done anything with furries. The issue mainly relies on the expansiveness of this subject - with the sheer amount of furries and furry-related shenanigans on the internet, along with the fact that most internet-savvy people at least have some passing knowledge of what a furry is, we need to be selective in our focus. Fortunately, Zeis introduced us to Pounced.Org - a furry dating website similar to okCupid, but with far more use of the term "diaperfur". This week, The F Plus develops a clothes-wearing fetish.
16/06/121h 10m

76: Today's Progress Was Yesterday's Form Field

In the run up to the 2008 American election, Barack Obama told the world that "We are the change we seek." And now, as we reflect on our discontent with the status quo of tax policies, drone strikes, prisoners held indefinitely, and general apathy, we may realize that maybe we weren't looking for us at all. Real change is gonna come from the internet, in the form of asinine and pointless online petitions. We're looking at Change.org and PetitionOnline.com, two sites where your voice can be heard, but it will still be marble-mouthed and pubescent. This week, who wants to get high? Go Islanders!
09/06/121h 11m

75: If I Could Turn Back Time, I'd Still Cut You In Half

WikiLeaks founder Julian Assange taught us a couple things about the world we live in. Firstly, it turns out that Steve Martin's hair may actually just be that color. But only slightly less shocking is the revelation that our government is keeping secrets from us. Millions of secrets! And yeah, some of them might involve the United States bombing our own journalists, but the folks at Above Top Secret have unraveled even deeper mysteries. Did you know that you can jump higher during the night time? It's true! Just don't bother testing that empirically because the Government will probably falsify your records. This week, The F Plus is breaking the laws of thermodynamics.
01/06/121h 10m

74: Our Love Doesn't Need A Third Dimension

An independent artist and Jell-O spokeswoman once said "love is a battlefield". She then said "love is a battlefield" many more times, because it was part of the chorus of her hit single, and if you don't sing the hits, the guys that run the state fairs don't give you the money. Anyway, what was I saying? Oh yes, love. It's a difficult topic, fraught with pain, heartbreak and uncertainty. Just because you love someone, does that mean she'll love you back? Well, if the object of your affection is a fictional cartoon character, the answer is always no, and among Otaku, that means yes. We're reading the thoughts of people in love with cartoon characters, and their love is just as real as their love for their last girlfriend. You don't know her. She lives in Canada. This week, The F Plus gets a busy signal trying to call the 3-D Police Department.
20/05/121h 11m

73: I Can Do Dream Analysis In My Sleep

For man to be truly aware of himself, he must explore his own mind. To examine your own thoughts, wants and failures and growing on the things you've learned is the way to thrive; to be a member of an evolving species who looks toward the horizon and takes a step forward. But what of dreams, those manifestations of your subconscious that you cannot seize control of? With an expression so disjointed and free of rational thought, can a dream really ever be understood? Well, if you're a member of dreammoods.com, sure! All you gotta do is start typing. This week, The F Plus is just waiting for Varzandeh to show up.
10/05/121h 12m

72: Commissioner Gordon's Back Up Plan

Popular media seems to get no end of pleasure in exploring the day to day drudgery of characters who belong in a comic book universe. For those superheroes and supervillains, their life is so absurd that there is very little relatability of those characters to people living in the real world. But then thanks to online RPGs like City of Heroes and Champions Online, anyone with an internet connection and a love for paying fees can create their own superhero and live in a world populated exclusively by other characters who also have stupid skill-sets. For the first of our Race For Ridiculism Showcase Episodes, Cleretic will be bringing us to this world, and forgetting to pack enough moist towelettes. This week, buy one glimp and get one free!
01/05/121h 9m

71: Amazon Recommends Years of Therapy

Respected authors and lifelong readers hold differing opinion on the benefits of the kindle. While some bemoan the loss of the tactile pleasures of a good novel, others feel an e-book is a purer manifestation of the written word. Of course, their debate is an irrelevancy. Human society never backs away from a technology for romantic reasons and those who want to do so are usually being nostalgic just because they enjoy being nostalgic. Plus, most people are just reading porn on those things anyway. This week, The F Plus tries to return our inflatable dog.
11/04/121h 9m

70: The Ace and Cakes

Hoosier biologist and unbelievable superpervert Alfred Kinsey believed that human sexual proclivities could all be charted on a seven point scale, from fully hetero to fully homo. Further, he attested that the majority of the species drifted towards the middle - in a grey area between gay and straight. But there's an oft-forgotten classification in this scale of sexuality, and that is for people who are completely dismissive of the whole affair altogether. I'm talking about the asexuals: people so unconcerned with sexual pursuits that they are free to spend their time more wisely, like telling the internet how unconcerned they are with sexual pursuits. This week, The F Plus doesn't even know what you're talking about. No really!
04/04/121h 8m

69: The State of the Micronation Is Wrong

As politcal rhetoric becomes increasingly rancorous and the division between politcal ideals divides wider so that no plausible middle ground can be reached, there are some people out there that feel that existing within a pre-established democracy just isn't going to work out, and that it's probably better to just start a new country from scratch. For all of these people, from the founders of Sealand to Sarah Palin's husband to those Libertarians in the 80's who got invaded by Tonga, results have been fairly discouraging. However, none of those people have ever made their own wiki site to explain their pitch, so things are probably looking up for the Federated Commonwealth of Malatora. This week, The F Plus learns that existence is futile.
11/03/121h 3m

68: The Episode Is Coming From Inside Your House!

The psychology and thematic considerations of "What Makes For Good Horror?" is something often discussed at length by people you probably don't want to associate yourself with. Obviously they may argue amongst themselves over minutae, but will usually cite a construction of tension, a feeling of malevolence, a spirit of helplessness, and no fewer than six bare breasts as the essential elements for finely constructed, timeless horror. The stories contained within this episode have none of these things, relying instead on grammatical errors and poor plot construction for a different feeling of unease entirely. This week, she melted. Seriously: she melted!
29/02/121h 8m

67: Where Can I Find A Tailor For These Pinstripe Balls?

For as long as man has had conscious thought, he has thought about sex, and this has certainly been reflected in his literary themes. From the literate but hypermasculine rememberances of Henry Miller's Tropic of Cancer, to the literate but impishly comedic creations of Voltaire's Candide to the not-at-all literate nor interesting fap material in John Cleland's Fanny Hill, erotic writing has had a storied history inside the pages of legitimate fiction. But fortunately, the English published Literary Review has helpfully highlighted some of the least impressive examples for us to lend our voices to. This week, the F Plus is on top of you, Skinner.
15/02/1228m 28s

66: As Normal As The Cosby Show (with Ted Kaczynski)

The modern world is one of isolation. As citizens of The First World, we are increasingly given license to socialize with whom we want, experience the things we choose, and create communities where we notice one lacking. As this happens, the concept of the status quo fades into a more abstract concept, and people start to wonder if they're normal being who they are. Looking for guidence, they turn to the internet, which is problematic because asking the internet what's normal is like.... asking the internet what's normal. If there's a better corollary I haven't thought of it. This week, The F Plus discovers new ways to take peyote.
09/02/1258m 25s

65: God Bless You, Water Woman

The Sasquatch (or "Bigfoot", if you're prone to epithets) is a large ape-like creature which typically finds its home in the Pacific Northwest where it somethimes poses for blurry photographs. Also it can read and write. Also it has sixth sense. Also it exists both in our world and in another dimension which has neither shape nor form. Also it lives among The Star People. Also it can teleport. Also it farts a lot. Also it can shape shift. Also it actually exists. Look, the point here is that dolphin expert Joan Ocean has a website which introduced all to the beauty of nature, and now we want to teach others about it. This week, The F Plus starts to apologize for that long hiatus.
01/02/121h 8m

64: Ignorance of the Law is My Excuse

There's a number of laws we all understand: Murder is illegal pretty much everywhere, as is theft and assault. We all recognize that, but then there's always gray areas. Does a schoolyard fight count as assault? Is it truly theft is it's not a physical object? And is murder justified if the person you just killed was talking about how funny last week's Big Bang Theory was? Legal experts have a difference of opinion, and as a country ages, laws get more and more complex. The finer points become less clear to the country's citizens, in particular the citzens who are also idiots. This week, The F Plus makes a protein shake with iguana meat.
15/12/111h 3m

63: Achtung! Adult Babies!

Growing up is hard. There's plenty of fiction centered around the frustration of adolescence, even more fiction on the malaise of adulthood, and then it's death after that. Wouldn't it be nice to just be a baby forever? Well, no - obviously it wouldn't. None of us remember our time as an infant, but clearly being mute, frail and covered in your own waste cannot be the most intellectually stimulating time of your life. But then, there's those that think that all sounds pretty good, especially if they can have sex while they're at it. This week, The F Plus wonders if adult babies are grosser than Bad Dragon customers.
30/11/111h 8m

62: The Private Language of Sinead O'Connor

Celebrity is a powerful but complicated status to keep on yourself. Some achieve by accident, some achieve by will, but then suddenly twenty years have gone by and you realize the ticket sales aren't what they used to be. Take Sin茅ad O'Connor for example. Responsible for a double platinum album in 1990 and the center of the biggest SNL scandal since John Belushi invited Fear on stage, now we're nearing the end of 2011, and she still wants you to know she's in the mix. This week, The F Plus learns a little something about lurrve.
04/11/1140m 48s

out07: Masturbation Gone Wrong [short]

In this outtake from episode 47 (In The World of Dragon Dildos, Is The Chin Wattle Man King?), we come across a thread where Bad Dragon customers freely discuss the times that their masturbation routines went unexpectedly. Absolute horror ensues.
28/10/1117m 0s

61: Any Cling You Want (You Got It)

We've been doing The F Plus podcast for a couple years now, so it's actually kind of an oversight on our part that we've never read stories about Roy Orbison. Or, more specifically, stories about Roy Orbison being completely wrapped up in clingfilm. Honestly, I can't imagine how we've avoided the subject for so long. This week, The F Plus finally experiences the greatest pleasure man has ever known.
20/10/111h 6m

live2b: F Plus Live 2 | F Plus Improves Your Life | Part 2

Part Two of F Plus Live 2 starts out a little dirty, but eventually we wipe up the floor. Lemon ft. bumpgrrl: Lemon's Craft Corner (using Make Your Own Sex Toys by Matt Pagett) Jimmyfranks: The Fine Art of Erotic Talk by Bonnie Gabriel bumpgrrl: The Power of Your Subconscious Mind by Joseph Murphy Lemon: How To Be A Sexual God In 3 Easy Lessons by Dusty White Portaxx: 10, 000 Ways to Say I Love You by Gregory Godek Isfahan: Mentalist Martial Arts by Ryan Blumenthal
15/10/111h 43m

live2a: F Plus Live 2 | F Plus Improves Your Life | Part 1

In our second live show, The F Plus Improves Your Life with the following readings... Kumquatxop: Here's The Situation by The Situation Boots Raingear: How to Good-bye Depression by by Hiroyuki Nishigaki Jack Chick: The Love Voodoo Kit by Voodoo Lou STOG The Power (The Secret) by Rhonda Byrne John Toast: Every Young Man's Battle by Stephen Arterburn
12/10/111h 23m

59: Planet Moneygrubber

Starting any creative endeavor takes a lot of hard work, dilligence, business acumen and some amount of money. It used to be that you were expected to come up with all of that yourself, but with the internet being what it is, people have come to expect that other people should provide at least one of those important factors. To that end, we would like to introduce you to kickstarter.com - a site dedicated to enterpraneurs amassing capital by the time-tested means of asking someone else for it. It's kind of like panhandling, except they like to use the word investment. This week on The F Plus, you won't need to put down your controller to grab a snack.
10/10/111h 5m

out08: The Otakindude Journal [short]

This is the last in our series of shorts for a little while, while we get the F Plus Live audio prepped for public consumption. This is a six minute short originally recorded during episode 42 (The Childfree Hardcore Episode). In the episode, we had read a little piece from a guy named Otakindude, who was angry because he was too fat to be Henry. After reading his tirade, we found his livejournal, which is what we're reading here. What's Otakindude's religion? And how did he discover his vampire powers? You're about to find out!
07/10/116m 18s

60: The Best Crowning Podcast of Awesome Greatness

The Austrian-born philosopher Ludwig Wittgenstein contended that a man could never truly know the mind of any other man. His belief was that language and thought are just too dissimilar in concept that to use one to explain the other is at best insufficent and at worst a fruitless excercise. Now it's about 70 years later, and we've all learned how to say 鈥渋t's just like that one Star Trek episode.鈥 TV Tropes is a community that defines and catalogues the shortcuts used in modern fiction, but this week, The F Plus is going to learn a little bit about these TV Tropers, and why so many of them are so gosh darn terrific.
18/09/111h 5m

58: I Can't Believe It's Entirely Butter!

We've been looking into your Facebook updates, and we've noticed you've been good all summer. You've been eating healthier, cutting down on sugary drinks, even getting a reasonable amount of excercise this year. Yes indeed, it's been work, but we've noticed you're looking a lot better and you don't seem quite as depressed as you used to be. But guess what? Summer's over. So let's get you back to your old habits. From the very fattest locations of AllRecipes.com to the most criminally negligant Food Network celebrities, we're going to be reading recipes that will make your arteries clog just from the sound of it. This week on The F Plus, it's all gonna look like poo poo.
04/09/111h 1m

57: Gotta Poke 'Em All

Since the dawn of the moving picture, studios have produced cartoons to appeal to a younger audience. These cartoons are typically colorful, whimsical, and unscrupulously cynical in their approach to selling merchandise to an impressionable and undiscerning fanbase. And since the dawn of the internet, this very same fanbase has demonstrated their psycho-sexual attraction to these cartoons that only wanted to sell them junk. To that end, we present you with Pok茅girls - one man's fantasy to create an entire race of anthropomorphic beastgirls forced into sexual servitude and apparently being fine with it. This week on The F Plus, we take The Elite Whore Challenge*. (Portaxx assures us that joke is funny.)
19/08/111h 3m

56: Excuse Me, May I See Your Water Selection?

As a species, humans have a small list of needs, a larger list of wants, and an even larger list of things to get arrogent and pissy about. This episode is all about water, specifically bottled water, which (as it turns out) can fit all three of these categories. Much in the same way that certain self-professed experts can wax poetic on the merits of certain wine vintages, there's a small but growing number of people who would like to share their enthusiasm for water, and just like the wine guys, they seem to be making most of this stuff up. This week, The F Plus gives the internet a thousand dollar swirlie.
07/08/1148m 7s

55: The Ship Vas Crash Like Boom

When you hear the words "bad fiction", there's a lot of different things that might come to mind. Perhaps you think of the works of completely inept but infuriatingly popular writers like Dan Brown or Danielle Steel. And one day, we'll get to writers like those. But for now, we have Storyprovider - a Finnish fanfic writer who, in a sentence, will misspell as many words as he spells correctly. This week, The F Plus would like to recommend the Army Fried Gyu.
22/07/1155m 39s

54: Yum, Slurp and Drool

This is an episode all about vore. If you don't know what the word "vore" means, then you can consider yourself morally pure. You don't spent a lot of time on the internet looking up creepy fetishes, and you're probably living a healthier and more productive life because of it. Unlucky for you, you're about to lose that innocence. Vore is a fetish wherein people eat other people. It's not cannibalism, that's something else. This is a thing about people eating other people whole. I'm sure the community for this will be well-rounded and reasonable. This week, The F Plus asks to Super Size our meal.
14/07/111h 4m

53: Socks, Bots and Burps

Some of our favorite F+ content has come to us, unsolicited, by our listeners. Honestly, I don't know how it is that you're coming across this kind of reading material, but I'm glad you do. To that end, we're offering three profoundly strange listener submissions: The first is fiction involving a transmogrification fetish, the second is a confession of one woman's love for a Peterbilt truck, and the third? Burp fetish. Yes, you read that right, burp fetish. This week, The F Plus tries to find their missing sock.
01/07/111h 2m

52: How To Listen To A Podcast (Advanced Users)

Yes, it's another WikiHow episode. No, it's not a re-run. Frankly, Boots has been wanting to record a second WikiHow episode since we finished recording the first one, and he's got a point. There's really so much additional ground we need to cover, it would be downright irresponsible for us to think we've taught you enough. We're covering the words of teenagers, misogynists, morons, nerds and perverts, all of whom have helpful advice for you. This week, The F Plus finishes Step Twelve.
25/06/111h 3m

51: She Thinks My Sex Are Spexy

If you've listened to the F Plus for any length of time, you've probably found yourself familiarized with certain obscure fetishes. And while some of these fetishes have been really strange, there's always a portion of the listenership that was already familiar with this subculture. That trend ends now. What we have here is a community of men and women who are really turned on by poor eyesight. People for whom the height of eroticism is ophthalmology exams with really poor numbers. This week on the F Plus, we let STOG sing a country song.
18/06/111h 2m

50: What's Louisville Got To Do With It?

Over the last couple months, the so-called "legitimate press" has spent time talking about the extension of the USA PATRIOT Act, legislation which has allowed the US Government to secretly monitor its citizens since 2001. But really, so what!? It barely makes a hill of beans of difference when you consider the sophisticated audio, video, microwave, laser and improvizational surveillance which the goverment has put in place specifically to annoy some woman named Connie Marshall. This week, The F Plus rethinks their millinery choices. (Look it up)
05/06/111h 2m

49: Reno Iz Drest In A Kostoom

Poorly constructed news reports and badly writen books will often speak about the "digital lives" that the anonymity of the internet afford us all. In the world of a MUCK (or multi-user chat kingdom), players can create an artificial personality and then use it to have artificial sex with other artificial personalities. And if that already sounds gross, it's gonna get worse when you're dealiing with people who have no idea how the female body works. This week, the F Plus finds new uses for the heart shaped box.
27/05/111h 1m

48: Weighted Companion Dudes

Nearly 50 episodes in, and it's time for The F Plus' first crossover. Lou Fernandez (of the Lou Reads podcast) is no stranger to terrible writing on the internet, but how will he respond when he's stuck in a room full of F Plus readers? Moreover, how will the F Plus readers respond to reading the okCupid profiles of the internet's most irritating nerds? The results shouldn't surprise you! This week, The F Plus looks at people who cannot possibly have sexually transmitted diseases.
21/05/1159m 17s

47: In The World of Dragon Dildos, Is The Chin-Wattle Man King?

I'd like you all to think back to the time that you were at an adult video store browsing the various "marital aids" that the store had available. Don't be shy to admit it, we're all friends here! Now... you remember looking at some of the more ridiculous products and giggling with your significant other over the thought of "Who would actually buy this thing?" This episode is like that, but way worse. We're focusing on the community of Bad Dragon, an online retailer of sex toys accurately modeled after the genitals of creatures that don't actually exist. This week, The F Plus visits the astral plane and gets busted by vice cops.
14/05/111h 2m

46: A Man Short On Charm

The PUA (pick up artist) Community is filled with self identified experts on bedding women, all jockeying for prominence and trying to sell basically the same book. How does one peacock his way to notoriety and celebrity status to be identified as an alpha-PUA? Well, if you're tonight's subject (a man named Roosh V), you do it by spending most of your time banging away at your blog, and trying to find the best font for the "I HATE WOMEN" sign that you hang over your head. This week, The F Plus congratulates American women for making this guy leave the country.
03/05/1157m 34s

45: It's Only Supernatural

For those unfamiliar with it, Supernatural is a television show about two hunky guys who fight monsters. Pulling from The CW's demographic of sexually frustrated young women with disposable income, it's a show with a fan base of a surprising number of pervy women who want to see the two hunky guys do it with each other. You'd think these women would be deterred by the fact that the hunky guys are actually brothers, but apparently that makes it better. This week, The F Plus looks at Wincesters until we reach for our Winchesters.
29/04/1150m 14s

44: How To Listen To A Podcast

While you probably couldn't tell it by this podcast, the internet is not entirely a place for weirdo fetishists to meet other weirdo fetishists and talk about Pokemon. I mean, yeah, that's a pretty big part of it. But there's also the often overlooked sector of the intenet which functions as an informational resource. We're already familiar with Wikipedia and IMDb, but there's also sites like WikiHow, a site which will teach you how to do ANYTHING! (as long as it's stupid) This week, The F Plus will be drinking during our 12 step program.
18/04/111h 7m

43: My Fanfics Are Full of Emotion

This is the internet, and there are nerdy teenagers on it. As such, there are a lot of people writing a lot of fanfiction about their favorite television shows. Having a podcast with an interest in such things means you have to be discerning, and seek out the fanfiction authors with a certain je ne sais quoi, a mixture of verve and enthusiasm for the written word that causes you to rethink everything you've been taught. Or maybe it's just terrible prose. This week on the F Plus, we're learning Danube ain't just a river in Germany.
12/04/1155m 25s

42: Suffer The Little Children

Most will agree that the decision to have a child is not one to be taken lightly, and in a modern world with new and complicated parenting concerns, some will remain resolute to never have children at all. But then there's a subsection of those people who will elect to be really annoying about it. We're tackling the livejournal community of cf_hardcore, a group of charisma-challenged individuals who feel they are constantly being persecuted by breeders. This week on The F Plus, we're finding new compound words to use with "crotch".
04/04/1157m 58s

41: Lemon Types In A Title For This Episode

The multiple award winning screenwriter Billy Wilder once said "Don't be too clever for an audience. Make it obvious. Make the subtitles obvious also." To that end, I think Mr. Wilder would applaud the fanfiction writers who we've profiled for this episode. We have Resident Evil and CSI screenplays featuring characters who actually speak their own stage direction along with the dialogue. And after that? A Star Wars crossover you probably weren't expecting. This week on The F Plus, dialogue won't be coming naturally.
22/03/111h 6m

40: I'm So Lonesome I Could Post On This Forum

Despite various expensive websites strongly promoting their "social" aspects, the fact remains that internet forums are a fairly antisocial experience. You sign in with an alternate identity, type some words into a box, and hope that other people might do the same in response. We visited alonelylife.com, where forum users kvetch about their problems meeting people, chime enthusiastically about how much better their e-friends are, and trade terrible poetry, despite having never learned how a haiku actually works. This week on The F Plus, seven will be the loneliest number you could ever do.
13/03/111h 3m

39: Hoc Est Praecipue De Buttsex

With all of the various sexual proclivities which the internet has allowed us to examine, it's sometimes easy to forget that there were actually perverts writing perverted things long before the internet was even invented. Thing is, you had to be a notable French Rensaissance writer or Latin poet for anyone to even pay attention. Well, in an effort to bring some classiness to the podcast, we'll be reading selected works from Catullus, Fran莽ois Rabelais, and James Joyce, and see how they compare to The Modern Weirdo. This week on the F Plus, it's gonna be like a classical literature class with a really creepy professor.
08/03/111h 1m

38: Let Your Subconscious Be Your Guide

People say that most human beings only use ten percent of their brains. The thing is, people who say that are lying to you. I mean, we have MRIs. All that glowing red stuff? That's the brain working. It's reminding you to breathe, remembering song lyrics, or in the cases of these subjects - making up a bunch of new age hippie nonsense. This week, it's psychic energy and hypnotism, and everything about it is as silly as you'd expect.
01/03/111h 2m

37: By Demons Be Driven (Insane)

Outside the walls of your apartment lie complications that are difficult and confusing. What will traffic be like on the way to work? If I go to the restaurant I like, will I get the awful waitress who never remembers my drink order? Why is my son failing math? These may seem like different problems, but in fact they have the same cause and the same solution. DEMONS DID IT. Throw blood on things. This week, The F Plus looks at people tormented by demons, and wonders how often they wash the floors.
24/02/111h 5m

36: Not As Funny With The Sound Off

Welcome to the exciting world of the ANIMATION COMMUNITY! A land of milk, honey, and nasally whines about the artistic merits of Quick Draw McGraw! Did you know that cartoons are the Greatest American Artform? Well, they would be, if studios would spend more time worrying about the needs of storyboard artists, and less time foolishly assuming that children are a good audience for this sort of high-brow expressionism. This week, The F Plus explores the world of overly-nostalgic manchildren, and learn that some of them aren't John K..
18/02/1148m 16s

35: Without Adult Supervision

When John's unavailable, Boots can't talk, and Lemon's internet dies, should the remaining ridiculists record an episode anyway? That's for you to decide! This episode we're discussing dragons, unicorns, flux capacitors, and light sabres. There's also a lot of talk about the Avatar Fleshlight, even though Boots edited that part out since it's just people looking at a picture.
13/02/111h 3m

34: This Is What You Want? This Is What You Get!

This episode of The F Plus is all stuff you've given to us. We start out with the psychotic racial and gender views of MAI-TRANG THI NGUYEN (PRONOUNCED AS 鈥榃IN), who thinks she is God. Once that's done, we have some fun with some Star Trek slash, take some of the best nuggets out of some of the worst fanfics, and learn a new way you can get cancer. This week, The F Plus looks directly into the face of GOD, and finds out she's a big slut.
09/02/1159m 13s

33: A Frottage In The Woods

Jesus! Are you back finally!? Yes we are and thank you very much for asking. The F Plus finally shambles out of its involuntary vacation to bring you unpleasantness you'll probably wish you never learned about. What is it this time? Frottage. Man-on-man, dong on dong frottage, the way that it was intended, at least from one very crazy person's perspective. This week, The F Plus brings you content you should plug your nose for.
28/01/1152m 58s

32: Excessive, Overwraught and Annoying

Pitchfork Media, often referred to as either "tastemakers" or "douchenozzles", depending on the source, have done the impossible: They have built a successful business, relying almost entirely on indulgent record reviews. And inarguably, the man responsible for the most eye-meltingly pompous reviews has been the focus of tonite's episode: Brent DiCrescenzo. This is a man who was actually dismissed from Pitchfork for the content of his record reviews, a man who wrote a Beastie Boys record review that Pitchfork actually had to print a retraction for. Clearly, he is F Plus material.
07/11/1058m 50s

live1a: F Plus Live 1 | Part One

A City Pages Certified A-List Event! Bunnybread: Sliding Into Home by Kendra Wilkinson Lemon: The Day I Shot Cupid by Jennifer Love Hewitt Boots Raingear: The Ice Opinion by Ice T Portaxx: Confessions of an Heiress by Paris Hilton bumpgrrl: Junior by Macaulay Culkin
19/10/1058m 40s

live1b: F Plus Live 1 (part two)

The live shenanigans continue, louder and drunker than before! STOG: Behind The Bell by Dustin Diamond John Toast: The Way Of The Master by Kirk Cameron Jack Chick: Wild by Fabio Jimmyfranks: The Man With The Gold by Mr. T Lemon: 60 Years Of Wit And Wisdom by Andy Rooney
19/10/1051m 27s

31: The Antisocial Network

With an registered userbase of over 500 million, Facebook has not been hindered much by niggling security concerns. Enter YourOpenBook. A site which, like Google, searches through all public profiles for people talking about the pressing news of the day, like their uninformed political opinions or details of who is cheating on them now. This week, The F Plus will make you doublecheck your security settings.
11/10/101h 3m

30: No Sense of Decency

With a two-party system, and an entrenched media bias favoring the status quo, often it is difficult for less established candidates to have their views heard. As a duty to the country more than half of call home, The F Plus attempts to correct this oversight, and reads the words as written by three overlooked candidates for political office: A fundamentalist libertarian, a man with his own religion, and Basil Marceaux: A man who, even by F Plus standards, is completely unclassifiable. This week, we go way beyond the beltway, and start to wish more people used soap.
22/09/101h 5m

shorts2010: Shorts Bonanza 2010

Back in 2010, we had a bunch of shorts up in the feed, all of which were accompanied with a plug for the first F Plus Live. Then when we switched the site over, those files were taken out of the feed. Well, Djeser was kind enough to stitch all these shorts together with some music, so now you can listen to the Gucci Mane Race War just like when Ke$ha was still a thing. Oh, the progress we've made! SHORTS INCLUDED: Gucci Man Race War This six minute short explores the curious case of a race war breaking out on YouTube just from people watching the video for Gucci Mane's song Lemonade. Here Come The Metalheads This fourteen minute episode has our ridiculists taking on the YouTube comments comments for a video of Metallica's Enter Sandman. Let's Settle This Religion Thing In nearly 20 minutes, we're going to try to solve the question of whether or not God exists. My Grey Baby This woman thinks she has been impregnated by a grey. Is she right? Yeah, probably. Sybil At The Movies In this thirty minute episode, we're going to read the opinions of a man who is not in control of his mental faculties, and ends up writing strange essays instead.
11/09/101h 19m

29: The Netflix Revue

With six million registered members, Netflix has become a dominant force in the entertainment industry. In fact, the recommendations given to you each time you sign in to the Netflix home page is crafted that way by what Netflix considers to be your peers - faceless people who have some sort of opinion about the movie in question. This episode, we plan to find the next Harry Knowles... and then mock him for being fat and stupid.
10/08/101h 6m

28: But What If They're All Crappie?

If spending sixteen hours a day on the internet is the reason why you can't get a date, you can solve your problem by stepping away from the computer every once in a while and having a real, human, engaging conversation with someone you find attractive and personable. But of course, you're not going to do that, and that's why dating sites exist. This week, the F Plus puts on those floppy hats and goes angling in PlentyOfFish.Com, the fact that it doesn't charge means we don't have to pay to make fun of it.
29/07/101h 9m

27: Sub Sub Pop

The internet isn't only a place for for shut-ins to discuss their fetishes. It's also a place where self-aggrandizing attention sluts ceaselessly bludgeon the public with their own material in a transparent and shameless grab for attention. And as podcast providers, The F Plus is sympathetic to such naked egotism, but what happens if your band sucks? This week, we're taking on the music site Review Rinse Repeat, which not only reviews bands, but also lets unsigned bands explain how different and special they all are.
21/07/101h 6m

12: The Christmas Offensive

So as it turns out, we were prevented from releasing the hackneyed Christmas Episode, and so instead are releasing the slightly less hackneyed Christmas In July Episode. This one focuses on the ire that Christians feel when they walk into a store and see the most offensive phrase in the English lexicon: Happy Holidays. Before we started doing The F Plus, we all had no idea that White Privilege could have so many different voices.
17/07/1057m 39s

26: Ranch Dressing & Other Delights

Since 1998, throngs of internet users have come to AllRecipes.Com to learn how to make the meals they've been dreaming of, and share recipes of their own. It's a site visited by literally millions of people, including clinically depressed housewives and lifelong bachelors with erectile dysfunction. What do these people like to feed themselves? Really horrific things. This episode, The F Plus has the sodium levels of the South China Sea.
28/06/1057m 49s
-
-
Heart UK
Mute/Un-mute