Heart UK

Wheneverly! with Dave and Tana

A Lesbian and a Jew get Drunk on themed Cocktails and talk circles about all things Pop Culture. Spoilers, Drinks, and Mayhem. All Men Must Drink!

David Willig,Tana Ford


 
Dave and Tana Get together one last time on Podbean to discuss their present and future. They solemnly swear to never pressure listeners to "LIKE AND SUBSCRIBE AND HIT THAT BELL" on youtube. Dave Teases a future Project, discusses his gourmet lunch, and Tana talks Comic book industry COVID issues, and humble brags about her 2nd Hugo award Nomination (the award definitely does not look like a Penis) .

#70 - This is Not the End, The End (Reupload)

Dave and Tana Return with this all New edition of Westeros Wheneverly. Tana came up with a genius new segment, called WISA...aka Who Is Still Alive. Spoilers....we think Stannis!!!! It is episode 69 and we make no innapropriate jokes...in fact, its about 15min before Dave mentions a Penis. This episode is a return to the books, to re-examine where the Winds of Winter will pick up. Who is still left on the battlefield.
 

 

^^Look at that Penis Sound Wave I made with my Voice! -Dave
 
All Men Must Drink
THE NORTHERN LIVING
Tonight we bring back an old favorite from way back “The Stannis Sour”. The True King deserves his crown so tonight I am drinking my version of this classic cocktail with:
2oz CROWN ROYAL CANADIAN WHISKEY
Juice of one whole LIME
I substitute simple syrup for the sweet cherry juice from BADA BING cherries, add freshly squeezed lime juice and top it all off with ice, ice baby. 

#69 - WISA in the North

Dave and Tana reunite for a friendship podcast. We touch on some Game of Thrones content but mostly, you guys, we just shoot the shit. If you want to get caught up on what Dave is up to (He is an American 007) and What comics Tana is doing (Laguardia came out today! NEW COMIC BOOK DAY!) Join us for a fun loving and bourbon soaked jaunt into nerdom.
WE ARE DRINKING THE SAME FRIKKEN BOURBON YOU GUYS!
Dave kept calling it “Devil’s Ridge”. Tana kept calling it “Devil’s Run.” The real name? “DEVILS RIVER”. Someone get these kids a water chaser. Or even better?
A Blue Curacao Nip, baby
WE BACK!
 

All Men Must Drink:
The Devil’s Peach
Half a Peach, roast in a baking dish, drizzled with honey at 400* for 40 minutesLet CoolInto your WESTEROS WHENEVERLY COCKTAIL SHAKERMuddle that sweet honey half peach with a sprig of fresh mint from the garden and Add 2-3 shots of whiskey of choiceAdd IceShake hard and strain well.
or in Dave's Case, Straight Bourbon on the Rocks...drink until Dave gets wasted (one drink).

#68 - Devil in the Details

Dave and Tana Assemble their Kings Council to discuss this AMAZING */s* episode....nuff said.
 


#67 - The Iron Throne

Dave and Tana Come together to discuss the Penultimate shitisode of Game of Thrones. Dave sees poop emojis everywhere!!! Tana tries to look on the bright-side, but D&D stuck a big Starbucks cup in her face...and somehow, Jamie grew a hand! What do you want to see in the final episode....cause Dave and Tana talk about their hopes, and nightmares.

 
ALL Men Must Drink:
Lemonade and Cherry Limeade
Sober....No amount of alcohol could have made this episode better.

#66 - The Bells

 
Mine is more of an (Irish) Massacre Mule (add bitters)
 
ALL MEN MUST DRINK
Tana’s Irish Massacre Mule
 
The juice and pulp of (2) limes
Irish Whiskey (I used the Costco/Kirkland brand which is decent, honestly) 
Sorghum and Sassafras Woodford Reserve bitters
 
Dave’s Moscow Mule 
(made with Crushed Ice, because Dave is fancy and has Crushed Ice fresh from the fridge which is where Missandei got dumped this episode) 
 
Titos Vodka, to taste
Lime, freshly squeezed
Crushed Ice (as mentioned) 
And a dash of grenadine - for all the blood that D and D have spilt this season from our hearts. 
 
HIGH NOTES: 
Genry becomes a Lord! 
We didn’t even mention that someone still lives in Dorne! 
Is it… Muentyn Quartell? A Sand Snake?! 
WHO KNOWS! 
On the long list of things these writers have ruined, DORNE barely gets a mention in this episode, my friends. 
So, drink up. Cheer up. 
And may the odds be ever in your favor. 
#WrongFranchise 

#65 The Last Stark (Starbucks Cup Included)

Dave and Tana discuss the lack of death (of the major characters), the amazing darkness (so red! so hellish!), and Tana can't help but notice the killing of all the brown people first (Dothraki and Unsullied),
(Tana your Westerosi politics are seeping through!) #brokethiswall. Tana unabashedly loved this episode (who even is she anymore?!). It was scary and exciting and chaotic and had us on the edge of our seats the whole time. We completely forget to mention the obvious name smash: "Azor AhArya!" But we certainly don't miss Jon doing Nothing.And why was Bran just watching Tree-V the whole time?Aren't you supposed to be the memory of mankind of something? (Hard eye roll) All Men Must Drink!

The Sour, Salty Tears of the Butthurt Haterbois

Coastal Elite IPA from theWest Palm Beach BreweryServed Frosty Cold and as Bitter as the Black Hearts of HatersDave sips on a Coke Zero (because he has an early day of work tomorrow and we don't always have to drink!)Long Live the Women of Westeros! Missandei, Melisandre, Team Dany, Lyanna Mormont and Arya Stark, Assassin Queen of my heart

#64 -The Battle of Winterfell


TRIGGER WARNING! 
To avoid the words "fap," (gross) "stacked" (meh) and "Jamie Bottoming" (I am here for this!) skip to minute 07:35 to avoid our problematic (?) discussion of Arya's sex scene, Jamie bottoming for Brienne, and the word "fap" ---which-- SUPER ICK DAVE.
--------- 
Otherwise - Best! Episode! Ever! 
This episode takes the cake (for Tana!) when it comes to this HBO show.
Join us as Dave and I discuss the ins-and-outs of "A Knight of the Seven Kingdoms"
Great character moments, Tormund steals the show, the brothers Lannister are reunited, Dany is alone, alone, aloe, everyone shares their last night before the apocalypse together and BRIENNE BREAKS THE GLASS CEILING OF WESTEROS.
All while Jenny's Song breaks every one of our hot blooded human hearts. 
(Yes, I have listened to the Florence and the Machine version approx. 2M times) 
(Don't @ me, bro)
Dave (as usual) sips his 
RUM AND COKE, with BLUE CURACAO.
Tana sips:
GIANT'S MILK out of her OWN HUGE HORN*
(actually a mason jar) 
2 oz Vanilla Vodka
2 oz Kahlua
Floater of Peppermint Schnapps (because the ICE KING COMETH!)
Almond Milk to taste
Pour over ice and stir to combine. 
Listen carefully, sweet friend, and you will for sure be able to tell how potent my particular drink was by the end of this episode. 
ALL MEN MUST DRINK! 
 
 

#63 - Knight of the Seven Kingdoms

Dave and Tana Return to Westeros by way of Green Dragons. Podcasting across the state of Florida we have a slightly new recording format...and Dave has to do some slight Editing. We talk all things "Winterfell" including boning in a cave, EDM rave parties, and ripping bandaids off. Bran is a Super Creep, Super Creep, Supper Creepy and Sansa is a Jelous sister?

All Men Must Drink:
Tana's Drink:Tonight I am also RIDING THE GREEN DRAGON!
THE GREEN DRAGON1 Whole Lime, Juiced1 Sprig of Mint, expressed2oz Gin (I used FORD's GIN) #Narcissism1oz Jim Beam Fire WhiskeyTopo Chico Sparkling Mineral WaterDrizzle of Peppermint Schnapps
Stir over ice in your WESTEROS WHENEVERLY TUMBLER (only 6 in existence) then pour over crushed ice (I wish) (It's cubed iced) and garnish with a lime wedge and sprig of mint.
Enjoy.That cold peppermint and hot taste of cinnamon mingle in your mouth for the experience of a lifetime, not unlike riding a dragon named after your real dad and his gal (RHAEGAL) #LyannaStark
Dave's Drink:
Lame Rum and Coke Zero...with a splash of Blue Curacao

#62 - Winterfell - Final Season

We watched, we casted, we ate breakfast. Dave and Tana end season 2 with a bang (just kidding, we did this one sober). Tana drinks Sprite Cranberry Zero, Dave has a Coke Zero, and Haleoris has a bag full of brain balls. We answer some questions, and create new ones thanks to the show runners. Finally, if you're interested we do some house cleaning at the end!
 


#61 - The Passenger

Dave and Tana Return to talk about Westworld Season 2 Episode 9, the Penultimate episode Vanishing Point. Tana quickly makes some Angles Envy Vanish, and Dave brings up some points (good? eh...maybe). We discuss if Man in Black is a host, is in the matrix, is this real life, or is this fantasy...caught in a westworld...oh escape from reality.
 
This Drink Looks Like Nothing:
Dave's Keto Rum and Coke:
Rum and Coke Zero
 
Tana's Bourbon:
Angles Envy on the Rocks....delicious, but you will forget the final question of the night.

#60 Vanishing Point

Tana and Dave finally reunited with Season 2 Episode 8 of  Westworld. We flush the format, and are now spoilers to the end of the season. This episode is variations on a theme (love) just like our drink is variations on a beverage (beer...or in my case Truly). Come take a ride on the train, as we tangent (Boston Marathon...really? Tana) toward the Valley Beyond...can we find the door (help....im trapped)
 

 
This Drink Looks like Nothing:
 
Beers of assorted variety, or whatver you have in the fridge.

#59 Kiksuya

Dave and Tana are back like Roaches. You Can't kill us...but you can kill our backups, which were two chains. We discuss Season 2 Episode 7 "Les Ecorches" which we find out means...naked body sketches...draw me, like one of your french girls Ford. Tana Coins/Ships the new Name for Ford + Bernard...FORDNARD, and we chow down on Shark Toots.

 
This Drink Looks Like Nothing:
Changes in Additude:
2oz Sake
1/2oz Blu Curacao
Topped with Lemon Lime Soda (we used Truly Lime)
Garnished with a Cherry.

#58 Les Ecorches

In this Cast every possible scenario happens all at once. Dave and Tana make Anal Jokes (whats new), Talk Ford Spoilers, Shogun world is finally over (except you get a Rant from Tana....two...two rants), and we get real (or robot) and deep with Man in Black.

 
This Drink Looks Like Nothing:
Hard (he he he) Seltzer. Choose your favorite type, sit at the pool, and listen to our podcast!

#57 Phase Space

Dave and Tana Saki Bomb this episode to shit, so much Tana couldnt have been bothered to make some art for it...see below. We get a glimpse into shogun world (why?) and Dolores upgrades Teddy Bear...and bones him in unwatchable robot sex.

 
This Drink Looks Like Nothing to Me:
 
Sake no Mai
Sapporo
Clear Chilled Sake
Many Many Burps...Chug away!

#56 - Akane No Mai

Here is the real jucy cortical fluid. Season 2 Episode 4 "Riddle of the sphinx" has us asking the important questions. WHAT THE HELL is Delos doing? Seriously, what are they up to? Will we ever see Logan again? (Tana really likes this dude...must be a comic book thing...snikt) We get a little lost in the bunker, but Closet Case returns and sets us straight.

 
This Drink Looks like Nothing:
 
Johnnie Walker Black served over a Big Ball of ice.

#55 - Riddle of the Sphinx

Dave and Tana do a quick Recap of Episode 3, Virtu e Fortuna. The Really good stuff happens in next episode...so listen to this cast, then listen to the next! Fort Hopeless Hope is on the Local Area Network Network, and Dolores is boring us...

 
This Drink Looks like Nothing:
 
Johnnie Walker Black Served with a Giant Ice Ball (Tana put her balls in my cup)

#54 - Virtu e Fortuna

Dave and Tana return for a twofer, Tequila Sunrises in hand to discuss the Reunion. Dolores may not belive in dreams, but she looks like one in that Black dress. Logan drinks to the end of humanity (what happens to that guy?), and Tana wonders if Maeve and Hector mirror Dolores and Teddy (William says everyone wants to look in a mirror).

 
This Drink Looks like Nothing:
Tequila from a tiny water bottle searved with orange Juice and some Grenadine!

#53 - Reunion

Tana and Dave Take a Journey into Night...while drinking Tequila Sunrises, because the sun never sets on a badass. Join us for this Season Opener, for the Season 2 Opener. We talk Dual Timelines, Is this Bernard or Arnold, and play a little Stump Dave.
 

 
This Drink Looks like Nothing:
Tequila Sunrise, served over crushed Ice!
 

#52 - Journey Into Night

We did it!!! We watched the whole first season before Season 2!!! Come listen as we get answers to some questions, WHERE IS GI JOE?, get more questions, and realize that Dave is Right...a bunch. Disect the Finale with us, and get ready for season 2!
 

 
This Drink Looks like Nothing:
 
Muddled Blackberries, Champagne of your choice!

#51 - The Bicameral Mind

Come to the Back woods, get your Clever, and join the Profun-dick jokes with Dave and Tana. We're already a couple Rum Poops in, so apologies for rambling while we talk about episode 9. The well Tempered Clavier.

 
This Drink Looks like Nothing:
 
Rum Poop Punch, The Technically name is The Well Tempered Curacao;
Muddle/smash Fresh Pineapple
Add Some Orange Juice, Cherry-Cran, and a touch of Blue Curacao
Dump a Bottle of Coconut Liquer (we used Clement, Mahina Coco a French Caribbean liquer) In and serve over Crushed Ice. 

#50 - The Well Tempered Clavier

Dave and Tana get busy with another Twofer, and Talk Episode 8 Trace Decay in this half. Its a blurry memory, but we get through it thanks to Tana's excellent notes. Tana, I kept distracted and only watching the show...Maybe I need better focus. 

 
This Drink Looks like Nothing:
 
Rum Poop Punch, The Technically name is The Well Tempered Curacao;
Muddle/smash Fresh Pineapple
Add Some Orange Juice, Cherry-Cran, and a touch of Blue Curacao
Dump a Bottle of Coconut Liquer (we used Clement, Mahina Coco a French Caribbean liquer) In and serve over Crushed Ice. 

#49 - Trace Decay

A trick, "No Micheal not a trick, and illusion". A design intended to create an illusion of a 3d object. That is what our episode/recap of S1E7 is all about. Everything would be what it isn't, and Dave and Tana are loopy. Giant Goblets of Mimosas, and deep thoughts about peacocking...how we didn't make dick jokes is a miracle.
 

 
This Drink Looks like Nothing:
Mimosas:Equal Parts Orange Juice and Champagne with a splash of Cran Juice to brighten it up

#48 - Trompe l'Oeil

Its SUNDAY SUNDAY FUNDAY, come on down and join Dave and Tana for bottomless mimosas. We give a treat, and cast a twofer (split) this half is episode 6 The Adversary. We talk about the Devil, The Maze, and the Vingear in Teddy's Soup. Becky was "Murdered" (WAS SHE?), Delos CEO Arrives, Teressa's a spy, Ford's Robot Family revealed, and Maeve gets an upgrade on this wild wild Westword Wheneverly!

 
This Drink Looks like Nothing:
Mimosas:Equal Parts Orange Juice and Champagne with a splash of Cran Juice to brighten it up
 

#47 - The Adversary

Dave and Tana discuss episode 5 entitled "Contrapasso". Stumping Dave, it means...listen to find out. We also go drink over the definitions of Dolores, Paraiah, and what the boy with the short pants might be. Guard Dog? Spy? Annoying little Shit? Listen to hear the all powerful Ford (Robert) interact with the man in black (and Dolores) and what that could mean. Cheers to the Woman in the White Shoes!

 
This Drink Looks like Nothing:
 
Heaven, Hell, and Earth Bourbon Tea
-Equal Parts Cinnamon Whiskey and Wild Turkey
-Splash of Unsweentend Iced Tea
-Sprig of Mint
-Bourbon Gummy Bears
 
Chill,stir and pour over crushed ice (duh). Garnish with the Mint and Bourbon Gummy Bears...Cheers to the woman in the white shoes and enjoy!

#46 - Contrapasso

Scott Fitzgerald, admittedly a drunk (he had 4 booze-related breakdowns), once claimed that gin was undetectable on the breath. (Bullshit, Dave can easily detect its terrible taste) But he *ALSO* said “The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposed ideas in the mind at the same time, and still retain the ability to function.”
 This is from his “The Crack-Up” and the entire passage is worth repeating here:
 “Before I go on with this short history, let me make a general observation– the test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposed ideas in the mind at the same time, and still retain the ability to function.
 One should, for example, be able to see that things are hopeless and yet be determined to make them otherwise.” –F. Scott Fitzgerald.
 Seen in the context of todays episode of WESTWORLD you can guess why Dave and Tana chose GIN as our booze of choice! Well, Tana chose it, and Dave just Drinks it.
"I wish this drink tasted like nothing to me"

 
This Drink Tastes Like Nothing:
 
Gin
Lime
Sprig of Mint
Tonic
Crushed Ice
Quarter Limes, Squeeze it in, and spin yourself off!

#45 - Cognitive Dissonance

Dave and Tana continue to spin themselfs off by making choices of their very own. Do you like it hot? Do you like it Cold? Whiskey Straight? We don't judge. In this episode we define "marpiosa", play a few rounds of stump Dave, and break down the meaty, juicy, chewy, philosophical nut that is conciousness. 
 

 
This Drink Looks like Nothing:
The Rum ChaiLatte:
 
Chai Tea (Hot or Cold)
Rumchata
Bourbon 
 

#44 - The Stray

According to the Cambridge dictionary an “OLD CHESTNUT” is: a subject, idea, or joke that has been discussed or repeated so often that it is not funny any more.
 
Repeated so often that it is not funny any more?..."Boobies"
You know, I’d say that explains rather a lot about this here second episode.
*spits into a spittoon*
 
Join Dave and Tana as they geek out, sip their Old Fashioned, and define yet other words (Bespoke) while pondering the great mysteries of what it means to be real.

 
This Drink Looks like Nothing:
Old Fashioned with Sassparilla and Sorgham Bitters
 

#43 - Chestnut

Dave and Tana are back, and they are spinning themselves off!! This time they are in a different West-World....in fact, they are in Westworld!!! We attempt to be smart about the New HBO Phenom Westworld, while we drink and ramble on.

 
This Drink Looks Like Nothing:
 
Craft Beer of Your Choosing
 
Shot of Walker Black Label....The Man in Black Label!

#42 - The Original - Westworld Wheneverly


In honor of the many couplings in this show getting an added (and often uninvited) character, Westeros Wheneverly presents:
 
The THREE-WAY FREEWAY
 
 
Three ingredients, shaken in equal parts over ice:
 
Fireball Cinnamon Fire Whiskey
Vanilla Vodka from the North
Apple Juice
 
Garnish with an apple slice over a rim of cinnamon sugar, especially if you like your unions extra sweet. Though, judging by that Brienne banter these Game of Thrones unions were extra salty.
 
Staying on point, this recipe was happily provided by our special guest and Wetseros Wheneverly Third - Kirsten! She joins us to nibble sharktoots, sip a beverage and talk all things Season 7.
 
Join us as we discuss such topics as: Joneys performing that savory Roast Chicken position, is AEGON going to be his real name? Did Sam just steamroll Gilly? #menamirite How about that TheonJon scene? Or Cersei’s inability to murder ANY of her brothers.
 
#ALLMENMUSTDRINK

#41 Dragon and Wolf

Tana finally comes back from the great beyond (Comic-Cons) to discuss Two episodes with Dave, Eastwatch and Beyond the Wall. After a huge mess with a food processor we Drink Jonnie White Walker Blue Slushies, play a quick game of "Dave reads Tana's Notes", and get jiggy with the episodes. I mean, come on...Northern Winter Olympics Anyone (thats a Gendry Maraetheon, and White Walker Tom Brady Joke)? Oh Yea...we turn 40!!!
 

 
White Walker Slushies
2oz Johnny Walker Black
3oz Blue Curacao
1 floater of chilled peppermint schnapps
Grape Gatorade
Crushed Ice blended into slushy perfection
 
This drink is a smokey peppermint delight.
Perfect for those moments when the White Walkers drag a dead dragon carcass out of the ice lake using huge (I mean massive!) chain they obviously have spent a ton of time building for just such an eventuality.
Next up?  The Season 7 Finale! 